How gay is football?

STaN

Soccer, the beautiful game - played more often than not by beautiful men in even more beautiful tight pants - must be the queerest thing going. Queerer than all six of the Village People squashed into a sauna for one. And not in the way your average burger-brained American means when he declares soccer to be 'totally gay' - ie it's British and you're not allowed to barrel into the other lads with your padded shoulders. No, we mean the real thing. Soccer is for homos.

Why? Well lets start with all the shennanigans on the pitch. Where else on the face of the earth, outside a boilerhouse or cruise club, would you see men lavishing this kind of physical affection on each other in public? At the merest sniff of a goal, they're all tripping over themselves to kiss each other and make big happy piles of writhing, celebrating footballer on the ground. This doen't happen in any other sport. It's the first link in the great soccer chain of man love. The second is the love grown men have for their favourite player, If you've ever been to a football match where a real bolden boy like Michael Owen or Robbie Keane is playing, you'll know that no teenage girl could match the sweaty ardour displayed by men of all ages in the terraces. 'Oohhh Robbie' they groand and squel, 'lash it in, go on!'. Schoolboy soccer is crawling with coaches, trainers, physios and other groupies whose abject devotion to 'the boys' on the field is fairly touching.

Then there's the love fans have for each other. Witness the scenes of pure sensual decadance between fellow fans at closing time when, say United win the Premiership or better still, Ireland fluke their way into a World Cup. On the back page of daily tabloids you've got more tantrums, bitching and gossip than you could ever hope for backstage an Eldon John concert. There's the obsession with fancy haircuts led by the likes of Becks and Aresenal's Freddy Ljungberg. The world of soccer is also top heavy with glammed up birds (all the best looking women usually wont be seen dead with a straight man and suspiciously perfect marraiges). Then there's Jordan. We'll, she's enough to turn anyone gay, isn't she? And don't even get us started on bent referees.

PiE

Originally posted by STaN
Soccer, the beautiful game - played more often than not by beautiful men in even more beautiful tight pants.

http://uglyfootballers.com/ugly_files/premiership/l_chadwick.html

If that doesn't turn you straight I dunno what will

ColinM

Good, but you need to do more ranting, and more examples of them being gay. Maybe you could expand on the undressing each other after the match, starting with their jerseys. Also make allusions to what they probably get up to in the showers.
It'd probably be a good idea to cross-post this in the GLB forum as well.

jEt|Dino

i so dont wanna get banned so

starstarstar and star to u

Big Ears

Stan u talk about gay so much i bet u are gay please ganalf ban this jack A.s.s

Dun

Why men play football?

Big Ears

some of those pictures are funny but the game isnt gay. i bet this stan guy thinks that all sports are gay and we should spend or time reading .any1 who thinks soccer is gay can **** OFF !!!

jEt|Dino

he digs it up bof pipes theres nothtin wrong wiv gettin a 9inch dong up yous batty

STaN

Originally posted by STaN
This doen't happen in any other sport.

Have you read the whole thing?

UbahOne

what a ridiculous post.

Sangre

I wasn't to sure of the truth in this...but then I thought about Celtic...and I knew it, football is gay.

neoB

So if that is the case.. are the women that play lesbians? O_o

Pepe LeFrits

hehe, nice post Stan. some of the replies are pretty funny too

DeVore

Originally posted by Big Ears
Stan u talk about gay so much i bet u are gay please ganalf ban this jack A.s.s

O_o

LOL, frankly.

You know, I bet he is too.

DeV.

Sangre

Originally posted by jEt|Dino
he digs it up bof pipes theres nothtin wrong wiv gettin a 9inch dong up yous batty

9 inches?

Fs, I'm hanging out with the wrong guys.

tHE vAGGABOND

this has stupid thread is now closed (and going to be moved to recycle bin)

DeVore

Dont you hate it when you say a thread is closed... and then forget to actually *close* it... I know I do.

I dunno though, I thought it was kinda funny but then, well, I think footie is gay... *shrug*

DeV.

Sangre

Oppression!
Fight the power!

Gay football for all!

Antisocialiser

what a ridiculous post.

This shows your underlying insecurity about your sexuality.

AngelofFire

lol when i was read this thread i thought stan meant "gay" in the cynical derogartory way. but i suppose hes right.

Crash

by "gay football for all" do you mean round balls of leather which enjoy the company and touch of other round balls of leather of the same gender? cus i'm all for equality in football sexual orientation circles. tbh i think there should be a board for it.

s0l

I can't remember any of stans other posts, but if this is anything to go by, he's either a total muppet, or felt like getting a funny argument going hope it's the later.

Tha Gopher

This thread be rather stupid......
In all honesty except maybe some of the europeans who come from places where kissing is the customary greeting how often have you saw players kiss after a goal scored? In all fairness loike.
By your logic the kiss of death and ring kissing means the mafia are actually comprised of a load of stuck in the closet beefy homos. And next time your in Los Angeles make sure to pull up to the black lads who give each other the welcoming hug and point out that it all shows an underlying gheyness.
Theyll pop something in your white ass but it probably wont be their nobs.

tman

i can see where STaN is coming from...
but hey, at least its not wrestling:D

Jimi-Spandex

"how gay is football?"

Stan is either a woman or a fat lazy nerd who has been bullied by a footballer.

anyway, rugby is gayer by a long shot. you know it, the scrum for christ sake?

Wook

Originally posted by dun_do_bheal
Why men play football?

are you Thai ?!

Tyrrial

Your such a blood Idiot,
come on, try to think about making that Brain cell you have Mutiply :rolleyes:

elexes

so many ppl dont know stan... thought he was more known then this ... a well

stan u bring up some intresting points but i think its just the way the players show that they are a close and well knit team... american footballer's/baseball slap eachother on the ass .basketballer's hug , etc...

+ i think u may be right about it also .. like the showers...what goes on in there after full time

tHE vAGGABOND

Dont you hate it when you say a thread is closed..

Maybe moving it to the recycle bin reopened it

On the topic of the post, reading it, it seems to be trying to say any person who shows affection for anyone else of the same sex is automatically gay?

thats just plain silly..

maybe its that people are not like light switches, on or off...gay or straight..

gay people dont own the copyright to love and affection for their fellow man

What is worth an article and some investigation is why is that in the entire planet of millions of soccer players there is not a single (mid to high profile at any rate) one who is openly gay..not one (not since Justin Fash, who was not open about it till right at the end of his career, not while he was playing for england)

zAbbo

/me nods

stan = raging homersexual

STaN

Notorious campaigner Peter Tatchell claims to know of at least 12 premiership players who are gay or bisexual. So who are they? And why won't they come out of the dressing room? Probably because they fear they'll get the same treatment as Justin Fashanu, Britian's first and only openly gay footballer. Fashanu has already broken the mould by becoming the first million pound black player, being sold from Norwich City to Nottingham Forest in 1981 at the age of 20. But his secret socialising while at Notts Forest came to the attention of the team's famously unpleasant then-manager Brian Clough. Clough humiliated him in front of the entire team and demanded to know why he 'kept going to that bloddy poofs club' before suspending him.



It would be another nine years before Fashanu historically came out, selling his story to The News Of The World for £80,000. Less noble was the fact that he'd made up all sorts of scurrilous sh*t about flings with Tory MPs to bump up his fee. Disgraced, he fled to the U.S. to begin coaching but trouble followed him there too and in 1998 - persecuted by claims that he had assaulted a 17 year old - he returned to England and hung himself in a lock up garage in Shorditch, East London. He is still the only British soccer player to come clean about his sexuality.

Sarky

Gayer than a tree full of monkeys on nitrous oxide.

Well, probably not. But I always did find it terribly amusing to see it being described as such a manly man's game, when I'd also notice what the original post mentioned.

Maybe they're all just really good buddies. Maybe there's a large proportion of closet homosexual people there. I don't know. As long as I don't get forced into watching what I consider a boring sport, I don't really care, either.

tHE vAGGABOND

persecuted by claims that he had assaulted a 17 year old

The Police in the US were going to arrest him for rape, but he left the country immediately..

I think he was a mixture of George Best and the modern footballers who went/go off the rails for too much money and booze ..

He was amazing at norwitch as a kid, but after his huge transfer he never made it at Forrest (what I have read that puff comment you quote from Clough to him was not made publically, but in a one to one) After forrest got rid of him he went to port vale, and then played for a load of clubs in england and scotland. He ended up coaching in the USA, where the unfortunate events happened just before he died..

But in this day and age, where you have a few organisations 'outing' people, its weird that there is not a single openly gay footballer..

(Justin F article in 442 this month BTW)

Dun

Originally posted by Wook
are you Thai ?!

Not the last time I checked! Got it by e-mail, but couldn't have been bothered uploading all the pics, so I googled it, and there it was. Never even noticed it was a Thai address.

Mossy Monk

Originally posted by Jimi-Spandex
anyway, rugby is gayer by a long shot. you know it, the scrum for christ sake?

indeed! olympic wrestling has to be the gayest sport on this planet though. 2 grown men rolling all over the ground in the name of sport

Sarky

In yellow spandex.

Tiesto

poor poor stan
WORST POST EVER

Stephen

I agree, football = gay.

Please continue with the "OMG STAN YUO FAG0T OLOLOLOLL" type comments, they're quite entertaining.

TomTom

Do gay people not alienate them selfves by creating a gay olympics or gay football team. It's not as if they deserve special treatment or that there is anything different about them. If gay people want to play let them, if gay players want to stay in the closet them let them, what the hell business is it of anyone else anyway. Maybe they are worried that they will loose respect of fellow players or maybe they know that there is no way in hell the others will feel comfortable in the showers with them.

That said, in comparison to hurling or gaelic, soccer is a soft game.

Ryo Hazuki

As cartman would say:

Your a fuc*in fa**ot dude.

Worst Thread Evar

(I hate football)

Tails

Originally posted by STaN

He is still the only British soccer player to come clean about his sexuality.

I thought Freddie ljunberg(?) (arsenal) admitted to being gay.

You started with the point that football is gay, yet later on you say there is 12 gay premership players.
12 gay people out of 242 isnt bad! i heard the average is about 1 in every ten is homosexual, but that could have been made up on the spot!:p but if thats the case football players are less gay than the average population!

and im pretty sure they are confident enough of their sexuality to hug another man without temptation, it would seem that stan would lack this confidence as he is uncomfortable merely to lack at men doing this!

sceptre

Originally posted by Tails
i heard the average is about 1 in every ten is homosexual, but that could have been made up on the spot!:p

Actually, it's based on a 1953 study of dubious veracity. The figure was 13 in 100 for men if I recall correctly.

STaN

Notorious campaigner Peter Tatchell claims to know of at least 12 premiership players who are gay or bisexual.

That one guy along know about 5% of the players were gay.

Also

and im pretty sure they are confident enough of their sexuality to hug another man without temptation, it would seem that stan would lack this confidence as he is uncomfortable merely to lack at men doing this!

Im not sure what the last part is ment to mean. But if you are of the opinion that i fancy any guy with legs, you are most mistaken

Gangsta

What a stupid post, soccer is the most popular sport in the world and any1 who doesn't like one sport or another has got a serious problem.

bizmark

TBH i dont like league Football much the players are over payed idoits (Beckham anyone ?)

But in all fairness it takes skill and the national games are great to watch

the question stan asks is a bit odd a sport cant be gay or non-gay (well WWF is pritty gay but thats not a sport)

sceptre

Originally posted by Gangsta
What a stupid post, soccer is the most popular sport in the world and any1 who doesn't like one sport or another has got a serious problem.

I'm a bit confused (no pun intended:D) by this. Do you mean "anyone who doesn't like sport has a serious problem"? Or "anyone who doesn't like one sport in particular" has a problem? Or something similar?

Let's put it this way. In my younger days (say, ten years ago), I was a prety hot sprinter. Wasn't going to make the Olympics in 96 but possibly/probably would have in 2000. That's before I moved off to college in '93 and got far more interested in having lots of sex (with girls if you must know but it's pretty irrelevant to be honest), interesting discourse with interesting people (we called it "coffee" and "drinking") and gradually just got fatter. These days I've absolutely no patience or interest in watching any soccer or athletics on the telly. Not even 30 seconds for the pole vault (lost interest in that years ago when Bubka made a business out of breaking the world record with a 50 grand bonus for each time). Far cry from the youngster who stayed up all night for 15 days to watch the Seoul olympics on the telly, never missed a cup match on the box and went to as many All-Ireland finals as I could. I don't have the patience to watch 90 minutes of a soccer match any more (last time I did was a year ago at a big-screen showing of a WC game at the Cat Laughs in Kilkenny). It's not bitterness, it's not anything more than a sheer geniune lack of interest. I didn't even feel like watching the Ryder Cup on the telly a wee while back. Do I have a "serious problem"?

nadir

competitive sport sucks imo
http://www.geocities.com/headhelicopter/text/sports.html
I rest my case.

Originally posted by Gangsta
What a stupid post, soccer is the most popular sport in the world and any1 who doesn't like one sport or another has got a serious problem.

Eh wtf? Oh please your majesty, be so good as to enlighten me and purge this unholy demon from me so that I may enjoy "the most popular sport in the world".:rolleyes:

That, my good friend with the IQ of a melted welly, is the most stupid post I've seen in a good while.


People like you are synopsised perfectly in the above link.

Sangre

*Swwoooosshhhhhh*

That was the sound of the thread going over the thread of half the people here.


P.s St@n j00 f@G