my ex is unwilling to do things the easy way and I'm going to have to go through court. What im wondering is, when i go to apply to district court can i apply for joint custody, or do i just apply for custody and a judge decides if it should be full custody, joint or none at all.
I don't want to try and take kids off my ex and i feel her getting a letter sayin i'm bringing her to court for custody may cause more bull and aggro if she feels im trying to "steal" her kids.
So is it possible to apply to court for joint costody
Are you married? If so, you already have Joint Custody. You cannot lose custody unless the court makes a declaration that you are "unfit to have custody of any dependent child of the family". Section 41.-(1) JUDICIAL SEPARATION AND FAMILY LAW REFORM ACT, 1989
Just be careful as the Court will seek to water this down by granting you and your wife Joint Custody "with main care and residence to the mother".
As a married father, you are also an automatic guardian which means that all decisions regarding the children should be made JOINTLY as per Section 6.-(1) of the Guardianship of Infants Act 1964.
According to S.I. No. 5/1998 GUARDIANSHIP OF CHILDREN (STATUTORY DECLARATION) REGULATIONS, 1998, Guardianship is "The collection of rights and duties which a parent has in respect of his or her child. It encompasses the duty to maintain and properly care for the child and the right to make decisions about a child's religious and secular education, health requirements and other matters affecting the welfare of the child. The exercise of guardianship rights may be agreed between parents. In the event of a dispute arising concerning the exercise of guardianship rights the court may determine the matter on the application of either parental guardian".
If you are not married, it's a whole different ball game.
I suggest that you write to your ex and suggest mediation before making an application to Court.
thanks james but thats not what im asking. what i need to know is when im speakin to the clerk do i say specifically joint custody or do i tell her i want to apply for custody.
on a side note. i've never signed a maintainance agreement and never had a receipt, can i force my ex to give me one every time i pay. i've never missed a week and overheard a couple of her friends say how she reckons i never give her a cent.
not being rude but just ask the clerk they don't bite they actually very nice and will tell you which to apply for.
Maintenance is a separate issue, you should always make sure you leave a paper trail otherwise its her words against yours. The best way to do it is through a bank if she will not agree with that maybe a postal order but do not give cash.
You could apply in the court for a maintenance order and if your both happy with the amount the judge just writes up order. This is what me and my ex did regarding guardianship and access.
My earlier post outlined how you already have joint custody if you are married so, are you married? I also advised mediation before going to court.
In relation to maintenance, you cannot force her to give receipts but you can pay her by cheque or postal order or write to her and ask for her bank details (account number, branch and sort code) and pay by standing order.
There is a new mediation service available in Dolphin House, being run as a pilot project. It could really help! Check it out.
Applying for joint custody means saying exactly that: joint custody, and if possible/necessary, joint guardianship and access. Also might I recommend you keep a paper trail for all payments, and keep receipts for all purchases, on behalf of your child. If your child's mum is lying to her friends, than it is possible she might lie in court too. She would be foolish to do so, but she might consider it, and if she does, at least then you can prove you are doing right by your child.