I love jokes but im a disaster at telling them and remembering them, hence why I cant think of one at the minute!
Anyone else with a half decent memory that remembers a joke get it started...
Do not quote really long posts. Its a fcuking pain to read.
Care of AlmightyCushion ..
What's the difference between Marmalade and Jam.
Saudi Arabia do not sell Flintstone DVD's
but Abu Dhabi do
How many potatoes does it take to kill an Irish person?
Whats a sh1tzu?
Why do elephants have 4 feet......................................cause they'd look silly with 6 inches
A man and a friend are playing golf one day at their local golf course. One of the guys is about to chip onto the green when he sees a long funeral procession on the road next to the course. He stops in mid-swing, takes off his golf cap, closes his eyes, and bows down in prayer.
His friend says: “Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You truly are a kind man.”
The man then replies:
A woman is on a beach one day when she sees Gary Glitter.
She turns to him and says "Excuse me but you're in my son".
A man who works in Carphone warehouse gets a text from his daughters saying,
As the man rushed home he couldn't help but wonder what "ternative" meant....
Why did Humpty Dumpty push his girlfriend off the wall? To see her crack.
I'll stop at nothing to avoid using negative numbers.
AGNB, that's bang out of order!
I'll be f*cked if this rape alarm doesn't work.
I was at an ATM and this old lady asked me to help check her balance. So I pushed her over.