I can see where you're coming from. Just could make you feel a bit false though? Don't want to be a constant downer either I suppose.
As long as people see what they need to see, want, what have you, I don't think about it too much.
Down ta fuck again. Changes every couple of hours... god this is hell sometimes. This is why I always worry about feeling good, I know it'll hurt more the more I come down to cold reality.
feel like **** at the minute, and feel **** for feeling ****..
feel like a dealt really badly with a situation at work today.. work with challenging behaviour and actually got visibly upset in front of group today because I just couldn't cope with the behaviour, in particular the attitude and language towards me.. its natural in a way, but I'm supposed to be the professional and be able to deal with this stuff but feel like situation got better of me. Hopefully a change coming soon, which is good because I just don't think I'm capable any more.. if I ever really was.
Hopefully its a sunny day tomorrow and I wake feeling brighter.. I had thought that maybe I was doing a bit better but I think I've just been suppressing things and avoiding situations/ things that would make me anxious.
Feel like a teenager, except its not that I wish my life was better or different.. more if someone could sort out my brain.
Not sure how I'm doing over the past few days, maybe a bit better or maybe a new stage. We'll see.
I wouldn't hope for sunny day if I were you... where we live it might lead to disappointment... ye have to stick with whatever has been keeping you well.
A new stage sounds good, hope ye get to it!
A new stage can go in either direction unfortunately, can only tell in hindsight.
Got some valium for the weekend so Il be ok!
I could do with some
Damn it, cut my hand quite bad yesterday, not sure why I did it instead of doing the usual cuts. Have a big dopey bandage on it today, and dealing with each and every awkward moment a customer asks me what happened..
OHHH if only someone could sort out our brains !!
Know how you feel ie feeling like **** for feeling like ****.
Sometimes I wonder do a lot of us have major problems dealing with other people.....and work makes us deal with other people daily !!
Work is hugh stressor....and the people we work with....
Not sure of a solution except trry like others seem to be able to do to let it roll off your shoulders and dont stress about it ! As if eh ;-)
hope today was a sunnier day for you all round ;-)
This might sound really weird but I'm feeling ok but terrified today. I feel like I'm sitting around just waiting for my mood to plummet again. I have a mountain of work that needs to get done and I'm scared that if I start into it, it'll just seem like too much so I'm not even going to try it Bloody brain!
Where can I find a list of registered/qualified counsellors? I need to talk to someone, but I am very reluctant to go to my GP.
Yea I'm experiencing that exact same thing alot now that I'm really actively trying to get better. When ye don't have optimism for years of your life, when it comes along it's such a relief you're afraid of doing anything that will make you forget it. I'm afraid to do anything that isn't concentrating on getting better - like reading - because I might lose what I've gained.
Going anon for this as have a lot of mates on boards I don't want knowing about this.
I don't really know where to start. As s far as I was concerned I've always being a perfectly happy and healthy person. I'm 28, have a great girlfriend who I love dearly and great set of really close friends. Depression or anxiety never once entered my head. If I'm honest I was ignorant to it and its effect. Until last Sunday. Was in my living room with my gf and she was chatting away to me, just random talk, nothing important. Next thing I get this strange feeling. Unlike anything I've ever felt before. I turn to her and say "I don't feel well" and she looks at me and then looks worried and asks me am I gonna faint as I've just turned pale as a ghost instantly. I have no idea whats happening me. My heart starts to pound a million times a minute. My arms and legs get a numbing sensation in them. I feel like there's something wrong with my breathing, I cant get a full breath of air into my lungs. I also have a sensation that I'm about to swallow my tongue. I get up and start pacing up and down outside my house frantically. I fell I have to move. This might sound stupid but I am convinced I am having a heart attack or a stroke or something terrible. I am about to ask my gf to ring for an ambulance or a doctor but I don't.
I try to drink some water but I actually can't swallow it. My heart slowly starts to beat at a more regular pace so I sit down. One minute I'm shivering the next I'm sweating. My gf says to me that she reckons I've had a panic attack when I start explaining what was wrong with me. For the rest of the night and into the next day I cant stop fidgeting, I have to keep moving my hands or legs. I don't sleep for about 48 hours. Ever since then I literally haven't thought about anything other than what happened me. It was without a doubt the worst feeling I've ever had in my life by a mile.
I used to think that a panic attack was something that a person could simply
"snap out" of if you told them to cop on there's nothing wrong with you. How wrong I was. I've been so anxious and worried about what happened me last Sunday. It hasn't left my mind. I've barely slept. My gf says it probably happened because I've been burning the candle at both ends a bit too much lately. And its true I have been, but I am living in constant fear of having another attack. Which I know is probably the worst thing I can do. Has anyone any advice on how to proceed from here? Thanks for reading.