Thanks for sharing your story with us.
Was it in Ireland?
Your birth mother never married?
yes in Ireland, even the same city!!
No she wasnt married, as far as i no she didnt tell my father she was pregnant....as they broke up....but the mad thing is they got back together and had a futher 2 kids which were given up for adoption aswell...
I'd like to disagree with the above if I may. I was adopted from St Patricks in 1977 and my parents are absolutely terrific and if I ever did make contact with my birthmum I'd like her to know that first and foremost. So don't be so sure of having messed up for her. Despite all the heartache adoption can be a positive experience and who's to say your daughter doesn't feel the same way too.
My story so far.
I'm 46, living in Dublin, was raised by an amazing couple who gave my big sister (adopted also) and myself everything they possibly could and we could not have been shown more love by anybody.
Dad is gone a good few years and we lost Mum recently which is what has led me here.
We have always known we were adopted and it was just the way things were, no big issue but not anything we ever talked about.
Sis who has lived abroad for over 30 years is in contact with her birth Mum who we have known her all our lives, Sis only became aware of the relationship when she was in her late teens and they exchange letters, the occasional phone call and visits when Sis comes home.
I on the other hand have very little info on my passed and have only really felt the need to find out what I can and see who might be out there since Mum passed. I often thought about looking but never felt the need.
So what I know, I was born in the UK, London and adopted here very young. I think I know my birth name and that is about the lot.
I'm about to apply to The Adoption Authority of Ireland for whatever info they have on me and try to follow the gide from there.
One question someone might know the answer to as its not clear to me, where would I have to go to do a birth cert search, here or the UK? It said on UK.gov site that I would have to get it from the authority's here because I was adopted here ?
I'll keep the forum updated on progress, might start a thread. Any tips, advice, or help of any kind is most welcome.
Thanks for reading.
New to this so here it goes! I have a half brother in Ireland somewhere and I would love to find him. Where on earth would I start?? He was adopted in late 70's early 80's
Any help would be great!
Have you tried the national adoption contact register?
Hi. I'm 28, I've known i was adopted since i can remember. I've never had any issues with it, and have always been very open about it, as have my siblings.
A couple of years ago i found my bm, and we have now met a few times. I've been taking it very slowly, and things are good. The last meeting was the nicest i think because we are getting more comfortable and conversations are just flowing nicely. But i still think the key for me, is taking months in between contact. It's helped me figure out my thoughts and feelings on the matter.
Will probably meet her parents next time. They are my dads age, which is kinda funny.
Hi, I'm 28 and searching for my birth mother/family. Haven't gotten further than the contact preference register and writing to the board for my non-identifying information, as I have very few details and I'm not even sure if they are correct.
I'm 24 and adopted..always known ive been adopted...just got a letter in the door from a social worker saying there are "relatives who want news of me"...this has caused interesting reactions from my parents...they literaly have ignored it and ive no idea what to do!! id love to find out more about my birth mother but dont know what to do now! I love my family...had the best life i could have asked for and im soo lucky and thankful that i was adopted into this family and not any other one!!!
God thats a hard one Wyyldfaery. You might want to try and sit your adopted parents down and talk it out with them. They are most probably in as much shock as you at the moment. You can only be honest with them and ask them to be as open with you as they can be. Have you rang the social worker back to find out more information? You could always exchange information with your BM (or whoever it is) for the moment and leave any face to face contact for a while. This would give your parents some time to get used to things too. I feel for you, its very hard.
Hi all, I'm Paul and I am 43 years old. I was born in St Patrick's Home, Navan Road, Dublin 7 on the 14th December 1968. I was adopted by two fantastic people who have given me the best up-bringing I could have wanted. I have obtained non-identifying information about my birth and birth-mother and I'm about the start a search. I have registered with Cunamh for information and a trace, but the waiting list is about 3 years, I have also registered in the Contact Preference list, no 'Match' so far.
My brith-mother was 19 and her name was Ann. Her mother, Father and sister knew about my birth and as far as I can tell helped her with the adoption process. She I believe was from Dublin and my Birth-Father (Paddy) was 23 years old.
Don't know really why I putting this information on this forum or what I will get back. We will see.
I wanted to throw my tuppence worth in to the debate. I had dealing with a Social worker there when the office was in Haddington Road. Christine was her name and she was very nice and helpful. She found my birth Mother quite quickly but that was almost 15 years ago. I was told some things about my natural family like my parents married and had a number of siblings including twins. They said that there were not ready to meet as the children were wrong. As you all know there is that part of you like a jigsaw that is missing and will never go away until you get the answers you so crave. Anyway the weird thing is that I have asked a couple of Private Investigators to search for them and to date nothing. I've even gone into the Records office to try and trace the twins whom I believe, according to the information given to me, were born between 71-73. And Nothing!!
So now I am questioning everything I was told by Christine. Also I am questioning if my Mother came up with all this to throw people off the scent.
Like the other people I've found the marriage certificates of everyone with her name but again nothing.
I'm going to chance talking to Sister Francis who was really rude the last time I spoke to her about 18 months ago. I happened to phone when she was going on her holidays and she said she would ring back!! Nothing again.
I am so annoyed and frustrated that St Patrick's Guild have a file on me and I am not entitled to the information contained within it!! I know that's the way things are but it is so unfair to adopted people!!
I'll finish now before I explode and wish all who are searching the best of luck because I am now starting to question everything I was told about my natural family as every lead comes up as a dead end!!
I was never officially adopted I was long term fostered with the same family since I was 6 months old. I am now 35 married with my own family.
I have my original birth cert and know my birth mothers name. I now feel it is time for me to trace my family back ground I would love any information on what's the best way to go about this. I was born 09/11/1976 my name on my birth cert is Barry Martin and my mothers name is Mary
Hi Sean, the best thing to do would be to contact the HSE in your area and they can put you in contact with their adoption and fostering social workers. You ideally would like as much information from ther file as possible. I'm not sure if the same rules would apply as an adopted person, you may be entitled to alot more info than us. From there you could ask the social workers do a trace for you or you can take it on yourself. The first step to trace yourself would be a trip to the GRO research room to see if your BM married (using the info from your file to narrow down the area as much as possible)
You could check out the hse website and have a look at the not legally adopted for more info
Hope this helps
Hi thanks for that got not the she and have now sent off a foi form to gain access to. My file .