[Kivaro]

Question stolen from the fun thread.

I would like him to say:
"Sorry for the misunderstanding, but I told that bastard Moses to go back and tell the tribe to live life to its fullest and love one another. But that flucker twisted my words into one of the biggest disasters in all the Universes. Yes, the planet earth is dead last in evolving societies from the millions of other planets I created."

And I would say:
"But God, you curse?"

And he would say:
"Yeah, and I drink like a fish too. Come on in, it's 5 o' clock somewhere and I'm gasping."

[Pushtrak]

I would like him to say:
I'm not really omnipotent, that is why I couldn't do anything about the suffering. Oh, and there isn't a hell, and you don't have to stick around for existence for millenia. People do get bored eventually.

I would say:
Shoulda wrote a better book

What he would say:
I ain't no Frank Herbert

[Jernal]

I would like him to say:
"Congratulations it was all a test and you PASSED! ! ! Welcome to Heaven."

I would say:
"Thanks ... I think. Er, what was the test again?."

What he would say:
"To see if you would recognise that religion, the supernatural, tales of the afterlife etc. were all bullshit lacking evidence and reasoned logic!"

[philologos]

Good and faithful servant. You have been faithful over a little. I will set you over much enter into the joy of your master. (Matthew 25:21)

I hope He'll be able to see my life and see that I served Him over myself and that I really cared about others and them coming to know Jesus Christ.

[Beruthiel]

what would you like to hear god say when you arrive at the gates?

Coke on the left, Tomoya Nagase on the right.
Knock yourself out.

[efb]

We've got Fibre Optic Broadband (and were big into cloud computing)

[noddyone2]

He'll be so stunned to see me there, he won't be able to say a fking thing!

[MagicMarker]

براہ مہربانی اپنے جوتے کو خارج کر دیں، ہم صرف قالین صاف ہے.

[Sir Digby Chicken Caesar]

asian women, asian women everywhere

[legspin]

You were right, I really am a cúnt.

[joseph brand]

"Congratulations brah!!" (Suddenly, trumpets and balloons)

"You didn't follow all those crusty old men down there, but instead chose to think for yourself. You'll never know how often I have had my own ROFL and /facepalm moments, watching those theists wasting their time. You see those dudes actually nailin' themselves to crosses? Like, wtf brah?".

"Anyway, there's a party right through that door, and lots of tits".

Me: "Thank God".

God: "Mi casa es su casa". (Massive high five)

[Sarky]

Yup, I was completely misinterpreted to suit human agendas. Seriously, did you READ that bollocks? Red sea? Faked. Water into wine? Yeah, I wish. Flood? Pull the other one, it has bells on. Now, grab a scotch and let's go visit hell to laugh at Christians.

[endacl]

I'd settle for 'sorry about that'.

[pauldla]

He'll say "Not you again!"

And I'll say "Didn't see that coming, did you?"

Then I'll ask if he's up for an angry pirate.

[Penn]

"Thanks you for participating in the Beta test. Based on customer feedback, we've now fixed all the faults and bugs. Your life will now be restarted."