Hi,

This I suppose is a very trivial issue, so apologies in advance, but would just like to get some feedback as its really bothering me.

A promotion came up in work a short while back, which was advertised internally first as per union rules. Another person who was at the same level as me went for it and so I didnt apply because I felt like my colleague would easily get it instead of me. I was too embarrassed to be rejected and have everyone else in the office know that I wasnt good enough to get the job. My colleague got the job as I knew he would.

Anyway, that same colleague has just handed in his notice and will be leaving, so the job opens up again. The problem is that while I want to apply for the opening, I think ive messed things up too much trying to hide my lack of confidence. My boss asked me why I didnt originally apply and I made up some lame excuse about not being able to do the shift for that job. I also told everyone else in the office the same thing, making out like I didnt really want it and I was happy where i was.

I do want it, but how do I apply now and do a complete turn around on what I was telling people just a fortnight ago. Also, as theyve already posted in internally, it will probably go external so there will be more applicants. Im already thinking of the shame if I applied now and didnt get it ahead of someone external (as the company is big on internal promotion, so I'd look really bad if i didnt get it i think).

Im just so annoyed myself that Ive messed up this chance. I'm currently stuck at the lowest possible level in work and this was my chance to move up. Its not even about the money, it was more the opportunity to learn a lot of new skills which would really have stood to me in future

[mari2222]

Ask the boss for 5 minutes private chat. Come clean. Ask for advice. Go get that job!

[thefeatheredcat]

2 weeks ago the opportunity came up and you didn't take it for fear of rejection and lacking confidence... 2 weeks later from that opportunity the position has come up again.

In your position I'd apply for it; nobody is going to think less of you. You realise you really do want it for what you stand to benefit from it in experience and through learning and I wouldn't worry what other people think. The only thing that really matters is you having the skills and competence to do the job.

Depending on how well your manager knows you, they might have guessed that it was an excuse when they asked why you didn't apply. If you feel more comfortable have a chat with them.

I don't think worrying about what others may or may not think should ever hold you back applying for a position... and if it sets gossip going or raises a few eyebrows, so what? Some people in your position might not even have the courage to consider it first time round and especially a second time as that takes even more courage.

The important thing is that you realise you missed the chance in lacking confidence and assuming your colleague would have been picked over you; you can still learn from that by applying. Let people think whatever they want to think and just go for it!

[JoeyJJ]

Who cares what people think, don't put time into fake side stories, however now that you have just say something like you were disappointed after x guy started work in his new role and realised you should have gone for it originally and you are keen on the position now.

[LittleBook]

Originally Posted by Unregistered

My boss asked me why I didnt originally apply

Just a thought ... your boss probably wouldn't have asked you this question if he thought you applying was a waste of time.

I agree you should have a chat with your boss but I think all you need to tell him is that you've been thinking about it and have changed your mind and ask his advice on how to proceed.

[lau1247]

people change minds all the time.. situation change, circumstance change.. just apply for it.. what have you got to lose.. Only way is up..

if anyone ask, just say that you manage to make a work around and organise something to be able to take up the position (if it ever come to that)

[Pessimist]

I'd apply for the job. What have you got to lose? Initially your boss asked you why you didn't apply so she/he must think you're qualified for the job.

If people look down at you for not getting the job over an external person, then they probably already don't think you're capable & so you lose nothing. In my experience though, it's people who worry & over analyse (like you seem to do) that are the most intelligent & capable.

Really, we regret the things we don't do in life, not the things we do do. So give it a shot and you won't have anything to regret. Explain to your boss that you have regretted not applying originally and feel fully ready & committed to the advancement.

[Sycopat]

Go for it. Just apply.

If anyone asks what changed afterwards, you can just tell them you didn't really think too hard about it last time around. When it came up again, you figured you had nothing to lose. Simples.

Your boss most certainly wouldn't have asked you why you didn't go for it if they didn't think you could do/get it.

Best of luck!

[Killed By Death]

You're totally overthinking it. You must be in with a chance if your boss asked you why you didn't apply for it.

Also this talk of 'shame' and 'rejection' and worrying what 'everyone' thinks is madness OP. Nobody thinks twice about anyone other than themselves. You are just not that important to other people you know, people are too wrapped up in themselves to really notice or care what you are doing.

Apply for the job, if you get it you get it, if you don't you don't. You're making far too much of a big deal out of it.

[mikemac1]

Go for it

The fact that your boss had a quiet word with you shows they were expecting you to apply and surprised you didn't

Just apply
Nobody in the place will think badly of you if you are rejected.

Instead it shows you are interested and aiming to move forward

The worst that can happen here is you don't get it but you've done an internal interview and are more prepared for next time

[Overheal]

Originally Posted by mari2222

Ask the boss for 5 minutes private chat. Come clean. Ask for advice. Go get that job!

+eleventy. Managers live and die on good communication from their team. Show them you don't have any quips about being that good communicator, that you're the kind of person they need to be able to trust in that spot.

[dellas1979]

Apply for that job now!!

What is humilating about going for a job and not getting it? You tried. Shows character.

Not applying for it IMO is worse than going for it and not getting it.

Let it be known to your boss that you are going for the job, that you want it, and that you are happy applying.

Its your life, and if you want something go get it and it shouldnt matter what people in your office think-thats something/some bubble youve created in your head.

[Zen65]

Originally Posted by Unregistered

I was too embarrassed to be rejected and have everyone else in the office know that I wasnt good enough to get the job. My colleague got the job as I knew he would.

What's to be embarrassed about? It's a nonsense to say that not getting a job means you were not good enough. Several applicants will be good enough to do the job, but managers pick the best. If you don't apply you'll never be the best, so it's a self-fulfilling prophesy.

People change their minds all the time. Several of my staff have told me they'd never apply for a particular promotion and days later they apply . . . "I'm entitled to change my mind" . . . and they are!

Go for it, and give it your best shot.

Be at peace,

Z

OP here,

I went for it and got it

Thanks for everyones advice on here - dont think I wouldve gone for the job if it wasnt for everyone who replied to my post and gave me the confidence to do it

[Magenta]

Yay!!!! Well done OP!