[Grolschevik]

Originally Posted by Chucky the tree

No one said anything about the kids being in danger.

You've been on Boards since 2002: surely you know by now that every thread, in every forum, eventually ends up with a "think of the children" post...

[Sea Filly]

Originally Posted by shoes34

I don't want to be horrible and say I don't want him there every weekend as this is the only time I have in my own home and I don't want to be uncomfortable and feel like I am playing gooseberry in my own home. But at the same time I don't want him there every weekend, I don't mind if its like once a month - does this sound terribly unfair

In a word, yes it's unfair, two weekends per month is not excessive. Just because it's your home, doesn't mean she's not allowed to have a life. Think about it, if ye were both renters, you wouldn't have any right to say anything, so why would you in your situation? I would be really pissed off in her shoes if told I couldn't have my boyfriend to stay every other weekend. Once a month is not enough, IMO.

[Sea Filly]

Originally Posted by mewriti exam

Are they renting a room, or paying to share a house? i.e Do they have use of the kitchen, living room etc or is their agreement based on some sort of reduced rent to limit their access? When you decided to have them pay part of the mortgage, you lost the right to call it "your house" for the duration of their tenancy. I'm sorry that this isn't how you want it to be, but at least you get to keep the house afterwards - they get nothing but a rent book showing them how much of your mortgage they paid.

Yup, this. It's not just your home, it's theirs too while they pay rent.

Stuff like this is why I would never rent in an owner-occupied place again, it never feels even or homely. Your landlord wants/needs your money but doesn't want you to encroach. Tough titties, IMO.

[Sea Filly]

Originally Posted by cant log in right now

Actually they don't get a rent book if the OP doesn't want to give them one. They are a licensee or lodger and not a tenant. They are not covered by the Residential Tenancies Act 2004 and as such have few rights.




They don't have rights. They have no contract with the OP as they are not a tenant, they are renting under the rent a room scheme and are not protected by the Residential Tenancies Act 2004. The OP can ask them to leave at any time and does not need to give them any reason nor any notice. I'm not saying the OP should do this but just pointing out that it's misinformation to claim the lodger has rights that they don't have. OP go check the citizens information page on the rent a room scheme. As you can't go via the PRTB as your not covered by the Residential Tenancies Act 2004 they rec you should try discussing the situation with them and attempt to resolve any issues between you. If you can't then you have to make the choice of either living with it or asking her to leave.

They have the right to find alternative accommodation.

[Sea Filly]

Originally Posted by djimi

Whether or not the place is registered with the PRTB does not change the fact that a licensee has very few rights and can be asked to leave without reason.

Or the fact that a tenant can leave at short notice if they dislike strict controls being put on their life. And it would harder to find a new tenant in an owner-occupied place.

[riclad]

If a young woman wants her boyfriend to stay 2days every week,
should should get a small flat,theres flats of various different sizes avaidable.if you are staying in a house ,with a landlord, ,theres compromises to be made,
you have no legal right to have people staying overnight ,You want more privacy,freedom, get a flat.
if a landlord wants 3 people staying in a house,he,ll advertise for 3tenants and at least get paid fairly for the inconvenience .
if i go to a cafe ,and buy a cup of coffee ,that doesnt mean i have the right to watch some horror film on a 17inch laptop ,there for the next 3 hours ,while eating 3 large sandwitches i made at home earlier.
And the landlord should say something if a tenant is bringing in too many people ,making too much noise,disturbing the neighbours,
whens shes,s away.
ITS not strict control to say ,you can have your bf staying here ,
3days ,per month.

[Idbatterim]

Op I totally see where you are coming from, most couples are a complete pain in the ass to be around often and in small spaces. I take it you rent the rooms out of necessity?

[djimi]

Originally Posted by Sea Filly

In a word, yes it's unfair, two weekends per month is not excessive. Just because it's your home, doesn't mean she's not allowed to have a life. Think about it, if ye were both renters, you wouldn't have any right to say anything, so why would you in your situation? I would be really pissed off in her shoes if told I couldn't have my boyfriend to stay every other weekend. Once a month is not enough, IMO.

But theyre not both renters. The OP is the owner of the house; this girl is only a licensee in the house. If the OP wanted to let her have her bf over every week or every other night or whatever then more power to them, and you might think its unfair if they dont, but the bottom line is that in this arrangement the owner/landlord sets the rules and the licensee either abides by them or finds somewhere else to live. Thems the laws of renting a room from an owner-occupier, and anyone who doesnt like them is free to rent their own apartment where they can get up to whatever they like, with whoever they like, and whenever they feel like it!

Originally Posted by Sea Filly

Or the fact that a tenant can leave at short notice if they dislike strict controls being put on their life. And it would harder to find a new tenant in an owner-occupied place.

Of course they can, and thats the other side of being a licensee in this situation. There are plenty of people who are looking to rent rooms, and the majority of them are quite happy to live by the rules. Just because this girl has the right to leave whenever she wants doesnt mean that the OP can let her do whatever she wants because of it.

[OldNotWIse]

If they are staying in her room that she is paying you for then I dont see the problem. It can cause a lot of bad feeling if you start laying down the law about who can and cannot stay, like living with parents again. This happened to me where my girlfriends flatmate actually banned me from the apartment, and I winded up creeping around like some piece of dirt, and being unable to go to the bathroom etc if I stayed with her after a night out. If they are keeping to themselves I would leave it be. of course if they are sitting up in your face every evening then that is not on.

[odds_on]

Originally Posted by OldNotWIse

If they are staying in her room that she is paying you for then I dont see the problem. It can cause a lot of bad feeling if you start laying down the law about who can and cannot stay, like living with parents again. This happened to me where my girlfriends flatmate actually banned me from the apartment, and I winded up creeping around like some piece of dirt, and being unable to go to the bathroom etc if I stayed with her after a night out. If they are keeping to themselves I would leave it be. of course if they are sitting up in your face every evening then that is not on.

The room is being rented to the licensee/lodger, one person. By having her b/f stay overnight she is not abiding by the rules. If she wants her b/f to stay let her find somewhere that allows that - a tenancy of some kind and all the consequences, responsibilities etc that go with a tenancy.

[djimi]

The OPs lodger should count herself lucky; I used to go out with a girls whos landlord (in an owner-occupier house) tried to charge me €50 a night to stay there...! He was quickly told where to go with himself!

[riclad]

its better to state from the start rule, re people staying over ,Before tenant moves in.
IF she wants to spend every weekend with boyfriend,she should find a new flat.

[OldNotWIse]

Originally Posted by odds_on

The room is being rented to the licensee/lodger, one person. By having her b/f stay overnight she is not abiding by the rules. If she wants her b/f to stay let her find somewhere that allows that - a tenancy of some kind and all the consequences, responsibilities etc that go with a tenancy.

I'm aware of that. But I think most landlords would be reasonable provided the tenant is not taking the proverbial. Maybe not.

If I want to be told I cannot bring anyone into my room I can live with mammy and at least get a free dinner every night and a lift to the bus in the morning haha (actually my mother doesnt mind me bringing my gf home, they even changed my single for a double when we'd been going out for a while - solely for sleeping puposes of course!)

[Bluefoam]

Originally Posted by cant log in right now

Actually they don't get a rent book if the OP doesn't want to give them one. They are a licensee or lodger and not a tenant. They are not covered by the Residential Tenancies Act 2004 and as such have few rights.




They don't have rights. They have no contract with the OP as they are not a tenant, they are renting under the rent a room scheme and are not protected by the Residential Tenancies Act 2004. The OP can ask them to leave at any time and does not need to give them any reason nor any notice. I'm not saying the OP should do this but just pointing out that it's misinformation to claim the lodger has rights that they don't have. OP go check the citizens information page on the rent a room scheme. As you can't go via the PRTB as your not covered by the Residential Tenancies Act 2004 they rec you should try discussing the situation with them and attempt to resolve any issues between you. If you can't then you have to make the choice of either living with it or asking her to leave.

The rent a room scheme only applies to renting out one room. In this scebario the owner is a Landlord and needs to pay tax on the rental income.

+ if you are renting facilities to anyone, you need to be respectful of them. The OP sounds very selfish in this instance.

[Sea Filly]

Originally Posted by djimi

But theyre not both renters. The OP is the owner of the house; this girl is only a licensee in the house. If the OP wanted to let her have her bf over every week or every other night or whatever then more power to them, and you might think its unfair if they dont, but the bottom line is that in this arrangement the owner/landlord sets the rules and the licensee either abides by them or finds somewhere else to live. Thems the laws of renting a room from an owner-occupier, and anyone who doesnt like them is free to rent their own apartment where they can get up to whatever they like, with whoever they like, and whenever they feel like it!

Yes, I know, the law has been mentioned many times in this thread, but IMO, the tenant DOES have a bit of power here too, as if she leaves, it might take a while for the room to be filled. Btw, a lot of people can't afford to rent an apartment alone. But many people, me included, avoid owner-occupied places like the plague as it's never feels like you are on even footing. The choices aren't just live in an owner-occupied place or rent by yourself, you know!

Originally Posted by djimi

Of course they can, and thats the other side of being a licensee in this situation. There are plenty of people who are looking to rent rooms, and the majority of them are quite happy to live by the rules. Just because this girl has the right to leave whenever she wants doesnt mean that the OP can let her do whatever she wants because of it.

Living in an owner-occupied place is a much less desirable prospect for renters than living in a house-share where everyone is on equal footing. So, IMO, there is a certain power in that that should ensure the lodger is treated like an adult, as MANY new tenants would be equally unimpressed by such restrictive rules.