[Shane-KornSpace]

are the lack of rights as a result of the name given?

[bluewolf]

no, nothing to do with the name

[Shane-KornSpace]

Ok, so Joint Guardianship is something to look in to. Thanks for that.

[Lola92]

Just to point out you don't need to be married to get joint guardianship. You can fill out a simple declaration and get it signed off.

[RubyGirl]

Op is your name on the birth certificate? If so then this is the only important document not whats on a christening or invites.

[Daisy M]

I agree it is your decision and your family should respect your choice. However maybe you and your gf should think a little more long term, if you and your gf marry or end up having more children and decide you would like for you all to have the same or a double barrell surname then it would be a little more complicated to change your childs name on the birth cert. If you put both surnames on the cert then you can choose to use one on a day to day basis but have the option to include the other in the future.

[bluewolf]

Originally Posted by Daisy M

I agree it is your decision and your family should respect your choice. However maybe you and your gf should think a little more long term, if you and your gf marry or end up having more children and decide you would like for you all to have the same or a double barrell surname then it would be a little more complicated to change your childs name on the birth cert. If you put both surnames on the cert then you can choose to use one on a day to day basis but have the option to include the other in the future.

he can take hers

[Lola92]

Originally Posted by Daisy M

I agree it is your decision and your family should respect your choice. However maybe you and your gf should think a little more long term, if you and your gf marry or end up having more children and decide you would like for you all to have the same or a double barrell surname then it would be a little more complicated to change your childs name on the birth cert. If you put both surnames on the cert then you can choose to use one on a day to day basis but have the option to include the other in the future.

It is actually very simple. Changing a child's name in the case if marriage of the parents just requires all involved to go to the registrars office with ID and a copy of original birth cert and marriage cert. A new birth cert with new/changed name will then be issued.

[Daisy M]

Originally Posted by bluewolf

he can take hers

If the op was female I would be encouraging her to put both surnames on the birth cert, my advice wasnt given on either the op and his gf using his/her surname in the event of marriage but based on keeping options open in case of a change of circumstances. Like, god forbid the death of one of the parents or a change in the op and his gfs feelings regards surnames.

Lola I didnt know that its great its so simple now.

[bluewolf]

Originally Posted by Daisy M

If the op was female I would be encouraging her to put both surnames on the birth cert, my advice wasnt given on either the op and his gf using his/her surname in the event of marriage but based on keeping options open in case of a change of circumstances. Like, god forbid the death of one of the parents or a change in the op and his gfs feelings regards surnames.

Lola I didnt know that its great its so simple now.

i didnt mean marriage i meant deed poll, he can change his, or they can change the kid's

[true-or-false]

OP, disregard your family's objections. They're being ridiculous.

[Shane-KornSpace]

thanks for the replies. ive been getting calls from my parents and my grandad, telling me how im direspecting the famiy by not giving him my name.
now im just feeling pressured in to making a change. very annoying

[James Jones]

Originally Posted by Lola92

Just to point out you don't need to be married to get joint guardianship. You can fill out a simple declaration and get it signed off.

Guardianship by either Statutory Declaration or Court Order can be taken from a father by the Court whereas Guardianship by marriage can't.

[lazygal]

Originally Posted by Shane-KornSpace

thanks for the replies. ive been getting calls from my parents and my grandad, telling me how im direspecting the famiy by not giving him my name.
now im just feeling pressured in to making a change. very annoying

Point out how disrespectful it would be to your partner's family to give the child your name.

We plan on a double barrel surname for our child, we won't be entertaining any expressions of sorrow or anger from anyone, including our parents. Our family, our decision, no else gets a say.

[Lola92]

Originally Posted by James Jones

Guardianship by either Statutory Declaration or Court Order can be taken from a father by the Court whereas Guardianship by marriage can't.

Unless the OP has a reason to believe that his partner intends on trying to remove his guardianship at some stage through the courts or he is a completely unfit parent then he probably doesn't have much to worry about. Marriage is a hell of a step to take just to get 'equal' guardianship of his own child and not necessary if the OP doesn't plan on getting married right now to go rushing into it just for this sake!

OP, tell your family how much they are disrespecting you and your partner by not accepting your wishes on this matter. It is obviously a decision that you both came to together and have considered. Your family need to stick their nose out of it. The child is both of yours equally and I don't know why they think that their name is so superior as to deserve a place beside your child's name rather than his mothers name.

I am not married to my partner and our daughter has my name and we are both very proud of that.