I'm interested in getting opinions on something.

1st, what is it you look for in a woman (or man), for a relationship.

2nd, if you're in a relationship, does your partner match up to the ideas you had before the relationship?

Me, I'm 25 and have not ever had a gf. Ya its a strange one. but I don't think I'm a quasimodo. Maybe I'm too picky - I want a girl who shares my interests, my music, my sense of humour, my love of travel, etc. I get bored with real girly girls, like my friends gfs, I dont see what they can talk about all the time when theyre alone.

But my mates have said that they felt the same as me before meeting their gfs. They think that theyre not compromising now, but of course they are?

Maybe what I'm looking for is a buddy, but in hot female format. Does such a thing even exist! Maybe I don't no what Im looking for, til I'll find it?

Curious to know others experiences, whether yer opinions maybe changed ovr the yrs, and so on.

[Otis Driftwood]

Moved from tGC.

[stripysocks85]

Im looking for someone easy going with a great sense of humour. Someone confident, but not arrogant. Hardworking, but not overly so. Someone who shares similar interests with me, but also different ones. Someone who enjoys sex. An all rounder I think. Your partner SHOULD be your best friend. Someone you can tell anything to and feel completely comfortable with. Someone you enjoy being with and look forward to spending time with. I'm being very idealistic here, but anyway

[cactuspaw]

tbh op, i think your one of the few 25 year old guys who looks for that kind of girl. most guys i know are very based on how a girl looks and while the group i hang out with is a good mix of guys and girls, most of the girls are single even though I would say they are very intelligent, attractive women. the guys in our group don't seem to be interested in us at all really, but happy to date girly, ditzzy girls.

anyway, what do I look for in a man? hmmm...how long have ya got?
sensible, decent funny guy. I used to be a lot more pickyer, but tbh now i just want a nice sound guy who i can have a bit of craic with. I guy who makes the effort and treats me with respect.

[allgirlz]

I am at the other end of things now as am married, but what I looked for in my husband was someone kind, who I could chat to about anything and who made me laugh and vice versa. Obviously at the start there was all the physical attraction (still is) but over time it grew into something more solid. I knew from the beginning he was different though, he never played games and always made me feel good about myself. He is my best friend, and is always in my corner, that is hugely important to me.
Sounds like you have a good attitude and I have no doubt that you will meet someone soon.

[bluewolf]

OP, this is now in PI, and not for getting others' experiences.
Is this a personal issue for you? If not I will lock it or move it somewhere

Originally Posted by bluewolf

OP, this is now in PI, and not for getting others' experiences.
Is this a personal issue for you? If not I will lock it or move it somewhere

No, certainly not a personal issue. I was just interested in hearing the experiences of others,to see how things had gone for them, if their opinions had changed over the years.

Its not an issue for me that I havent had a girlfriend. I thought it might have been a good discussion is all, whether your wants and needs change when you meet the right person. I was looking for discussion, not advice.

No point moving to AH I think. I thought gents club may have been interesting place for it, but it seems not. I'm not sure where else would suit really.

[ihsb]

OP, I think you have to change what you expect.

I personally think that your OH should be your best friend. But to share all the same interests I think is mad. Variety is the spice of life and if you find someone that shares all these things with you then you may aswell stay alone because you will be dating a female version of yourself.

Of course you need some things in common. To me sex and sense of humour is the most important. But the OH has a completely different taste in music, doesn't have the same passion for travel as I have and expects completely different things off me in a relationship as to what I expect of him.

But somehow it works.

Be more open to girlie-girls, they might surprise you and be open to compromise.

[That_Guy]

Personally I look for someone with a good personality first and foremost. If she's pretty then that's a bonus but not a necessity for me.

I'd like someone with similar interests but I think it's important to share different interests and to get involved with her interests just as I'd like her to share in mine from time to time.

Just somebody I can trust really and share nice moments with and have stupid private jokes and basically just to have that butterfly feeling again knowing that somebody thinks the world of you like you do her.

Oh and the ride.

[jaffacakesyum]

Looks and personality are equally important for me. I'd hate to be with someone who didn't think I was 'that pretty' and was just with me because we got on really well, clicked personality wise.

I don't think it's shallow either. I just won't get in a relationship with someone who I think is 'alright' looking. They have to be really attractive to me. That doesn't mean they need to be a supermodel - what I find really attractive somebody else could think is 'meh'.

[stupidusername]

The right amount of sensitive, hard working, funny, intelligent, open, thoughtful - the usual things people go for I suppose. a big thing for me is feeling he's into me. don't like doing the chasing.

[Sauve]

Originally Posted by allgirlz

is always in my corner

^^
Very well said. That sentence pretty much sums up what I would describe as the perfect relationship.
It summarises a healthy balance of encouragement, inspiration, loyalty, trust. Someone who will challenge you, pull the best out of you, and still be there when it all falls apart.

Physically, I rate 'that something' over looks everytime. That flash of attraction when you first make eye contact? Unbeatable

[kangaroo]

Aside:
Personally, I find this sort of thread more interesting if people say if they are male or female. Note: I'm not saying anyone has to. However, some posters may think many or most people will know while I, for one, find it hard to keep track of who is who, even when I'm posting, or reading, a bit.
(Male, although I find the gender thing more interesting for the "What is important for you in a relationship?" question and similar questions, rather than this sort of comment).

[amacachi]

Looks aren't hugely important to me but for me to be interested in a girl she has to have blue eyes.
I'm pretty non-specifically fussy when it comes to women. Funny and smart would be the two main things. Also not worried about heavy usage of alcohol and stuff. Doesn't seem too likely.

[guitarzero]

First off, I have to be physically attracted to her. I still cant grasp how folks can be with someone and not find them arousing, it simply doesnt add up for me. And as many have said too, I'm not out searching for a model, just someone that I find attractive. Based on girlfriends in the past, what I find attractive can vary a fair bit.

The hardest part for me is the character compatibility, I'm like a triple A battery. I dont get a long with most folks I meet but I'm always accommodating. I'm naturally introspective and prefer meaningful dialogue over small talk. Of course, with the opposite sex, this means the odds are even more unfavourable, here in Dublin anyway.

You mentioned your 25, I wouldnt worry, a few of my mates havent had GF's before and they're heading into their late 20's, one of them is actually a great catch. Vast majority of fellas/mates I know are single not by choice but because what you were kinda hinting at, the actual talking to women and how much compromise you have to make. Would I be wrong is guessing you're from Dublin? I've found a lot of the Dublin women in their 20's, whether it be cuz of the celtic tiger, TV, Sugar Babes or whatever, to be pretty dim, easily amused, a bit hysterical. You simply cant have a conversation with most of them without wondering "what would my 14 year old self say?".

Your mates are with those girly girls for one thing, it just depends how much you are willing to compromise, what your threshold for stupidity is. If she's a cracker then I'd definitely laugh at her bullshít over a few pints.

I think a lot of depends on what you're into, your character and how attractive you are. If you're into alternative types of music, very picky and another face in the crowd then online dating could be the thing for you.