[G86]

Dear D..

I think you're awesome! (not to mention very, very hot!) I'd a brill day with you today, and you almost made me forget I'd dropped 20kg on my foot....

You'd better hit that 220kg deadlift before I go.... And you'd better be here when I get back!

Sure it's only a skip, hop and jump away...

G

Dear God/universe/karma/whoever or whatever is out there.

I've never wanted much for myself, i'm not a selfish person, i try to be a good person. There are only 3 things in this entire world that i've ever wanted for me, for myself, they are not materialistic things, they are 3 things you give to people every day of the week. I know 2 of these things are out of my control, and i accept that they may never happen for me. But one of these things i've done what i could to make happen, i mean i really did the best i could do then i hoped and wished and dreamed, i even prayed, but today i found out it wasn't to be .

The hurt inside me i can't even begin to describe. I feel sick to my stomach. I know i would've been so good at it, nobody would work harder than me, nobody.

What the hell do i do now? Why don't i deserve it? Do you hate me that much?
I feel like such a failure.

What to you do when you've lost your dream? Honestly i don't even know, the only happiness i'd ever gotten was the belief that soon i'd get to do what i've always wanted. That i could start building the life I wanted, not the life everyone else wanted me to have. Everything i've ever done since i was 17 years old was for this.

Now it's all gone, and there's no happiness anymore. I'm just so sad, that complete hollow empty achy kind of sadness. My future is just a vast empty pit of nothingness.
You must really hate me.

And then to add insult to injury you decide to bring him into my life?! for 3 days you allowed me to believe that two of those things i've always wanted, TWO! could actually happen?! More fool me for actually being stupid enough to believe it. Why? what was the point? Showing me someone who could actually make me happy? Someone nice and warm and kind, the instant i met him i felt a comfort and safeness i've never felt before. I can never have him now, you made sure of that today, you finished it before it could even have a chance to start, he now exists just to show me everything i'm missing, everything i can't have. You must really hate me.

Is this punishment for something? Whatever i've done wrong, i'm sorry, i'm so sorry because it must have been so awful to deserve this.

I'm a good person, why are you hurting me like this?

From
Broken Girl

[Walls]

Originally Posted by brokengirl

Dear God/universe/karma/whoever or whatever is out there.

.... I'm a good person, why are you hurting me like this?

From
Broken Girl

Don't know if we're allowed to comment, but just to say the universe doesn't give you what you want. You have to fight for it. Fight for it, don't give up! Keep going, you'll get there!

[pinkheels88]

Dear Z,

I never in a million years would have guessed I'd find myself on this path but wow am I glad I'm here! You came into my life so suddenly and so ground-breakingly, and I've questioned everything which has come and gone before, and everything which lies ahead.

I feel like a new person already and I've only started on this path. There are many obstacles to come, many awkward questions to be answered, but with your continued support and the support of those few close friends, I can see this happening.


x

[shakencat]

Il be happy when its over.

10...weeks..couldnt..go..any...slower..

and in return.

I want him.

[Novella]

Dear U,

It has been nearly 4 years now and we're still in the exact same place we were back then. We constantly have the same conversations. I'm tired. I'm tired of hearing about how it's "always me", how we just have something you can't find with anyone else. I know that. Do you think I don't know that?

It was instant attraction for me. Then I got to know you as a person and it's hard to know now if that was a good thing or not. On one hand, we get on so well and we've always had such intense chemistry and sexual compatibility but on the other, it never goes anywhere. We tip-toe around each other when it comes to feelings and the majority of the time we can be honest with each other, one or both of us is/are drunk.

I don't think I want you but at the same time, I can't make the "what if's" go away. When I have a bf and you text me, I automatically feel like I'm doing something wrong. And you have cheated on so many girls with me. I think that makes both of us pretty horrible people.

It needs to stop. All of it. I need it to stop.

Dear you,

It's been almost a year now; and it somehow seems like much long and much shorter all at the same time. God, I was so in love with you, I remember that feeling I'd get every time you looked at me; that rush I'd get every time you held my hand. I'd never felt a love like it before, and I think that's what made it so damn hard to let you go.

I knew it was the best thing, but it hurt so much and I couldn't see how I'd ever move on. Loving you took over my life, and when I lost you I lost a part of myself in the process. The reality is though, that I'd lost you a long time before we actually said the words, those words that went unsaid for so long.

It seems like forever since you held my hand, forever since you looked at me with that cheeky twinkle in your eye. But somehow, - somehow in the middle of forever, I stopped missing those moments....and I stopped missing you.

I don't think I ever really knew you, you'd changed so much by the time I met you that I don't think you even recognised yourself anymore. You changed to cope with a world that seemed to smother you with every breath you took, and I think you somehow lost yourself along the way. I think maybe I was a part of that coping mechanism for a while, until I became a part of the problem.

See, I can admit that to myself now, I can admit that loving each other wasn't good for us, and that we just couldn't make each other happy. I can see that love really shouldn't hurt that much. And that's a big thing for me, it's a really big thing.

I'd convinced myself that things would get better, that you'd get better and everything would be ok. I was in a relationship with no intimacy, no honesty, and no stability - yet I convinced myself that I could fix it, because giving up felt like failure, it made me feel like a failure - like I'd let you down. That's the legacy my mother left me with when she hit that bottle, she left me with self worth so low that the only way I could feel like anything but a failure was to fix someone else.

I know now that I was co-dependant, I can see how I enabled you and I can see that we're better off apart. You're happier now, at least you appear to be, and I am so unbelievably proud of you. I always knew you could do it, I always believed in you, and I know you're going to be so, so successful in everything you do. I'm so happy that you've found yourself again, and that you're chasing the dreams that always seemed so far away.

I'm alot happier now too, I've done so many things that I've never have done had we not brought things to an end. I'm so excited about the rest of my life, because I've taken ownership of it again and it's mine...my life is mine, and I no longer carry the weight of other people problems as my own. I still care, too much sometimes, but I've learned where to draw the line now - something I was never capable of doing before.

Some harsh words have passed between us, and a lot of pain has been caused, but I think that somehow we've both come out the other side. I don't think I could ever really know you again, but I'm ok with you from a distance. I think you feel the same - and that's more than either of us could have asked for. I don't hate you, despite it all, and I promise you I never did.

You'll always have a piece of my heart, but just a tiny piece, because I need the rest for all the love I have to give. Live well, be happy, and do everything you feared you never would.

With love, and a smile.

Me x

p.s. You'd be a great father, no matter what you may think, don't let any of it stop someone calling you Daddy some day.

Communication difficulties. That would be putting it mildly, alright. Sometimes I think you expect me to communicate through telepathy or something. Tis frustrating, to say the least, especially when I don't think I've ever been unduly tongue-tied around you, or us, or any of this, really.

[Asphyxia]

Dear Uncle Bob!

Happy Birthday

I can't believe it's nearly been three years since you've gone I hope you're safe and happy wherever you are. You lit a spark inside our hearts For now the angels have you but we'll see you again in different times

Miss you and love you

N xXx

Dear N.

Why do you have to make everything so complicated? Even the most simple things are turned into drama and arguments. Why? Do you get some kind of kick out of being permanently angry and taking it out on those closest to you?

I am only asking for one small thing from you and of course you refuse. After all the favours and things I have done for you on my own accord and you can't even do this for me. I hope you enjoy being so self-centered because it's not going to get you far in life. And the fakeness? Dear God if I have to listen to anymore "I'm always this happy woowee" blah blah blah fake crap anymore I might actually scream. Please give it up. We all see right through it, and find it offensive that you think we'd believe it. It's ok to be down now and then. No one is judging you. Sometimes I want nothing more than to give you a taste of your own medicine, but I know that that would only make me like you, and I am a better person than that.

I know you are hurting inside, but please stop taking your hurt out on S. He is the most fantastic son and he does not deserve to be made feel worthless and useless by you. He is always there for you, supporting you, helping you and you don't even appreciate it. You have no right to treat him like you do. Please talk to someone about your problems becasue your behaviour is creating unneseccary tension between me and S. It's difficult for me to always have to pick up the pieces after your tirrades.

Your behaviour has had only one positive affect, and that is to make me realise how lucky I am to have S. in my life. I am thankful that we have each other, and that I can be here for him and reassure him that eventually things will get better. I don't know how and I don't know when, but someday I hope that you realise how amazing and special and wonderful he is, and that you can appreciate him and love him like I do. It may never happen, but I can always hope.

[Justask]

Dear Ex...

Your only angry because you got caught!!!

You thought you were smarter then me...guess what your not

You lost, and in my book thats called TOUGH

From The clever one

Dear B,

Please take me back. I was so stupid to let you go and I know I was just playing games by leading you on for so long... I couldn't see what i can now!

I can't stand people telling me these things happen for a reason or if its meant to be it will!
Fate doesn't always work like that! Sometimes you have to put out your two hand and grab it.

I'm nothing without you. I love you so so so so so so so much I just hope you realise that. Every thought for my future is with you.

Please take me back.

Love and miss you,

S

x x x

Dear P

Oh look you're online now, gonna talk to me?
Of course you're not.
I almost bought it, you were so very close.

You could've at least sent me one text or a message! I deserved that much!
But it's OK, i get it now, you only let people get so close, friends are disposable.
You'll keep in touch with them when you need drinking buddies and forget them when you don't.
I was just an extension of that wasn't I?
Just something to boost your ego until it was time to move on.
You're an alright guy tough, I don't think you even do it on purpose to be honest, you just put yourself first all the time, every time, which is fair enough, but it's not something that i want in a partner, you're definitely not someone who's right for me, our values are way too different.

I'm so glad i didn't sleep with you!! There was just something that wasn't quite right, a little niggling doubt..

It's the best thing i never did!

I genuinely hope everything works out for you.

You need to start trusting people again and stop being so afraid of looking foolish, i hope you do. Let people get to know you, what's the worst that could happen?
You've a lot of growing up to do, i know you'll understand one day when you mature a little more

Maybe i should delete you but... meh i've no real ill will against you.
I can just be another long lost acquaintance eh? Fine with me. I know what it is now.


From Me

[Kaffy]

Hey F

Stop talking in a baby voice ! You are 21 not 2!
Its driving me crazy having to listen to it and it makes you sound ridiculous!!!!
I may not be responsible for my actions if you keep talking like that !!

me

Hey R

How can you fancy someone who talks in a baby voice? Does it not make you cringe?

me

[theg81der]

Originally Posted by Kaffy

Hey F

Stop talking in a baby voice ! You are 21 not 2!
Its driving me crazy having to listen to it and it makes you sound ridiculous!!!!
I may not be responsible for my actions if you keep talking like that !!

me

Hey R

How can you fancy someone who talks in a baby voice? Does it not make you cringe?

me

I don`t know if we`re allowed to comment but -

Dear k,

Any chance you fancy R and thats why you find F soooo annoying?

Me

(joking, couldn`t help myself)