[Karsini]

It's been difficult for me the past few days. I think it's been adding up over the last 6 weeks or so as I've been working more than usual to cover for other work colleagues being off. The thing which has been keeping me going is that I was meant to be taking a train driving course next week but that has been cancelled due to engine trouble. I had also planned a trip to London but that's a no-go for obvious reasons.

Due to this I just feel empty and pointless. I'm supposed to be off work from Friday until September 5th but I'm almost considering cancelling my leave or at least reducing it as I'll have nothing to do with my time, short of going back to my parents' place in Kerry and having a lazy week or two. However I do need some time off as it feels like I've been doing nothing but working recently.

Today was the worst, I came home from work around 2:30 and slept for a few hours because I couldn't think of anything to do. I just feel so lonely and empty. It's times like this that I do stupid things, such as walking late at night with no regard to my personal safety. I already did it tonight around 11pm, the words going through my head at the time were "I don't care if anything happens to me, nobody would know anyway." I sometimes think that if something major were ever to happen to me, it would probably take days or even weeks before someone found out about it, I'm that withdrawn from the world.

[mw9121970]

Originally Posted by Karsini

It's been difficult for me the past few days. I think it's been adding up over the last 6 weeks or so as I've been working more than usual to cover for other work colleagues being off. The thing which has been keeping me going is that I was meant to be taking a train driving course next week but that has been cancelled due to engine trouble. I had also planned a trip to London but that's a no-go for obvious reasons.

Due to this I just feel empty and pointless. I'm supposed to be off work from Friday until September 5th but I'm almost considering cancelling my leave or at least reducing it as I'll have nothing to do with my time, short of going back to my parents' place in Kerry and having a lazy week or two. However I do need some time off as it feels like I've been doing nothing but working recently.

Today was the worst, I came home from work around 2:30 and slept for a few hours because I couldn't think of anything to do. I just feel so lonely and empty. It's times like this that I do stupid things, such as walking late at night with no regard to my personal safety. I already did it tonight around 11pm, the words going through my head at the time were "I don't care if anything happens to me, nobody would know anyway." I sometimes think that if something major were ever to happen to me, it would probably take days or even weeks before someone found out about it, I'm that withdrawn from the world.

I'm sorry to hear you are feeling like this. If I was in your shoes I would make an appointment to see a doctor. You can feel better. Have you got any friends you can talk to in the meantime. Hope this helps.

[Karsini]

Originally Posted by mw9121970

I'm sorry to hear you are feeling like this. If I was in your shoes I would make an appointment to see a doctor. You can feel better. Have you got any friends you can talk to in the meantime. Hope this helps.

Thanks. I've very few friends to be honest. Here in Dublin I pretty much only have my cousin as a friend. I have two or three in Kerry but don't see them very often these days. I never had many friends as I've always been very quiet and appear a bit "odd" to some people, especially to other kids when I was a child.

[mw9121970]

Originally Posted by Karsini

Thanks. I've very few friends to be honest. Here in Dublin I pretty much only have my cousin as a friend. I have two or three in Kerry but don't see them very often these days. I never had many friends as I've always been very quiet and appear a bit "odd" to some people, especially to other kids when I was a child.

You don't seem odd to me then again we are not children any more. You sound like someone who is honest and a good person. The feelings you have are something you have in common with a lot of people. Kerry seems to have a good social, life lots of things to do - am I wrong?

[starviewadams]

Was out tonight with a group of friends of a friend and bumped into my ex,was talking to her for ages and we were getting on great,was like old times,then I went to the toilet and when I came back I found her getting off with probably the stupidest guy of the group.I haven't gone out with her for over two years now but she was my only 'proper' girlfriend of my adult life.

I know it shouldn't hurt and I should just forget about it,and her but it does and I can't,no matter how I hard I try to block the image out of my mind.I think I liked things better when I was by myself in my room instead of out and attempting to socialise.

Think I'll take a full diazepam tonight,with any luck it will erase my memory's of tonight.

[mareliada]

Originally Posted by Karsini

It's been difficult for me the past few days. I think it's been adding up over the last 6 weeks or so as I've been working more than usual to cover for other work colleagues being off. The thing which has been keeping me going is that I was meant to be taking a train driving course next week but that has been cancelled due to engine trouble. I had also planned a trip to London but that's a no-go for obvious reasons.

Due to this I just feel empty and pointless. I'm supposed to be off work from Friday until September 5th but I'm almost considering cancelling my leave or at least reducing it as I'll have nothing to do with my time, short of going back to my parents' place in Kerry and having a lazy week or two. However I do need some time off as it feels like I've been doing nothing but working recently.

Today was the worst, I came home from work around 2:30 and slept for a few hours because I couldn't think of anything to do. I just feel so lonely and empty. It's times like this that I do stupid things, such as walking late at night with no regard to my personal safety. I already did it tonight around 11pm, the words going through my head at the time were "I don't care if anything happens to me, nobody would know anyway." I sometimes think that if something major were ever to happen to me, it would probably take days or even weeks before someone found out about it, I'm that withdrawn from the world.

you seem exhausted. take the time off, even if you just sleep- it might do you world of good. go walking during the day for fresh air and hopfully some sunshine(!)
have you considered getting a pet? dogs are amazing company. if you can't realistically look after a dog due to work hours, could you see yourself volunteering at dscpa? we have a little fella and he has been so good for mood lifting and companionship. he is also a good way to have regualar but brief chats with other dog owners in area.
maybe dogs aren't for you, but it is the best thing we ever did, more effective than anything else we tried.

[Karsini]

Originally Posted by mw9121970

You don't seem odd to me then again we are not children any more. You sound like someone who is honest and a good person. The feelings you have are something you have in common with a lot of people. Kerry seems to have a good social, life lots of things to do - am I wrong?

Well I'm originally from Dublin, I just lived in Kerry for a few years. It wasn't really for me down there so I came back, but I've nobody here bar family.

The impression of being "odd" was more to do with my interests, I had (and still have) no interest in sports, I'm more interested in technology, railways and media.

Originally Posted by mareliada

you seem exhausted. take the time off, even if you just sleep- it might do you world of good. go walking during the day for fresh air and hopfully some sunshine(!)
have you considered getting a pet? dogs are amazing company. if you can't realistically look after a dog due to work hours, could you see yourself volunteering at dscpa? we have a little fella and he has been so good for mood lifting and companionship. he is also a good way to have regualar but brief chats with other dog owners in area.
maybe dogs aren't for you, but it is the best thing we ever did, more effective than anything else we tried.

My lease specifically forbids pets so getting one is out unfortunately. I wasn't really crazy about dogs for a long time but in recent years I've warmed to them.

[flutterflye]

Ugh I hate this.
I am unable to do very little atm.
Basic planning seems impossible.
Usually my brain never shuts up and there are too many thoughts at once, but at the moment it's like there is not one thing going on upstairs at all.
Usually, I love reading and researching stuff, and forming opinions etc...
But I am only able to think very basic things like "I agree with that" and so on.
And as for any tasks or errands, it's like I don't know where to start;
Do I have a shower, or organise what to wear, or ring the bank, or have lunch first?
Simple, simple things.
As I already said - uuuuugggggghhhhhhh!!!!!!!

[mw9121970]

Originally Posted by Karsini

Well I'm originally from Dublin, I just lived in Kerry for a few years. It wasn't really for me down there so I came back, but I've nobody here bar family.

The impression of being "odd" was more to do with my interests, I had (and still have) no interest in sports, I'm more interested in technology, railways and media.


My lease specifically forbids pets so getting one is out unfortunately. I wasn't really crazy about dogs for a long time but in recent years I've warmed to them.

Could you get involved with a shelter for dogs maybe?

[Gillo]

Feel like I'm back to square one at the moment, I had been doing okish but completely dropped yesterday and have felt like complete crap the last twenty four hours. I told one friend who got really anxious about how bad I was and she went and told me parents (who I hadn't told about the depression) so now they are all over me, I know they mean well but really just want to be by myself. In fairness to that friend she felt she was doing the right thing and was concerned for my saftey.

The really bad thing is I keep getting suicidal thoughts and the more it goes on the easier it is to see myself acting, which is something I know I shouldn't do.

[girlonfire]

Originally Posted by starviewadams

Was out tonight with a group of friends of a friend and bumped into my ex,was talking to her for ages and we were getting on great,was like old times,then I went to the toilet and when I came back I found her getting off with probably the stupidest guy of the group.I haven't gone out with her for over two years now but she was my only 'proper' girlfriend of my adult life.

I know it shouldn't hurt and I should just forget about it,and her but it does and I can't,no matter how I hard I try to block the image out of my mind.I think I liked things better when I was by myself in my room instead of out and attempting to socialise.

Think I'll take a full diazepam tonight,with any luck it will erase my memory's of tonight.

That's a bummer alright. Do you still have feelings for this girl or was it more a case of bringing other feelings to the surface?
While this wasn't the best situation, it's still positive that you were out socialising and enjoying yourself up to that point. Try to hold onto some of the positives if you can.

[starviewadams]

Originally Posted by girlonfire

That's a bummer alright. Do you still have feelings for this girl or was it more a case of bringing other feelings to the surface?
While this wasn't the best situation, it's still positive that you were out socialising and enjoying yourself up to that point. Try to hold onto some of the positives if you can.

I still do have feelings for her,I'm not much of a ladies man like and I was the happiest I've ever been when we were together.Last night was the first time in ages that I've seen or spoken to her and the feelings just came back I spose,usually try to avoid being anywhere where she's likely to be cos I always end up feeling bad after seeing her,last night even more so after witnessing her with another fella.

Crap time too cos I'm starting a new course on Wednesday and I just feel completely down and worthless,which isn't a great way to start anything off.

[fisgon]

I asked this question in another thread, but I thought I'd ask it here too.

I'm taking Lexapro, and have been for 4 weeks, a low dose 5mg, and it's helping me a lot for anxiety and depression, but I have bad dry mouth. I know that this is common with SSRI antiDs, but I was wondering, if you get one side effect with one SSRI, then is it likely you will get the same with the others?

In other words, is it worth my while changing the medication to try and avoid the dry mouth, or is it likely I will simply have the same experience with Prozac, Cipramil, etc.? Thanks in advance..

[Princess Peach]

Originally Posted by tony 2 eyes

i am starting a course of 10mg of lexapro today and just want to know bout it. i have been reading some of the posts abouts them but am wondering how long do i have to stay on them. if they work do i have to stay on them? what about side effects? i dont want to be going around like a zombie or maybe be too happy as the complete opposite to depressed. whats your experience with them. i am just a little worried about taking them.

Hey! I'm on Lexapro too. How are you getting on? First week side affects were the worst for me. Some side affects stuck around for a few months. Didn't get any kind of zombie reaction at all, think if you do it means its not the medication for you and you should change.

Been on it about 2 years now. My doctor recommended a 9 month period at first but then extended it to early next year. She said some people have a slower recovery rate but I'm not to worry about that and probable won't have to take them forever

Lexapro really works well for me but I'm mostly sick of paying for them! So pricey.

Originally Posted by fisgon

I asked this question in another thread, but I thought I'd ask it here too.

I'm taking Lexapro, and have been for 4 weeks, a low dose 5mg, and it's helping me a lot for anxiety and depression, but I have bad dry mouth. I know that this is common with SSRI antiDs, but I was wondering, if you get one side effect with one SSRI, then is it likely you will get the same with the others?

In other words, is it worth my while changing the medication to try and avoid the dry mouth, or is it likely I will simply have the same experience with Prozac, Cipramil, etc.? Thanks in advance..

I had the worst dry mouth ever with Lexapro! Sipping water all day long. I started on 20mgs. It did go away after about 3 months of taking it though.

If it works well for you keep taking it and just keep a bottle of water with you at all times. Water is really good for you anyway

[someyoke]

Originally Posted by starviewadams

Was out tonight with a group of friends of a friend and bumped into my ex,was talking to her for ages and we were getting on great,was like old times,then I went to the toilet and when I came back I found her getting off with probably the stupidest guy of the group.I haven't gone out with her for over two years now but she was my only 'proper' girlfriend of my adult life.

I know it shouldn't hurt and I should just forget about it,and her but it does and I can't,no matter how I hard I try to block the image out of my mind.I think I liked things better when I was by myself in my room instead of out and attempting to socialise.

Think I'll take a full diazepam tonight,with any luck it will erase my memory's of tonight.

feel real empathy for you. sounds like you're a similar character to me. just tell yourself if you got a girl like this once you can do it again. and if that's the way this girl wants to behave she's not even worth thinking about. doesn't even have the sensitivity to consider how her actions might affect you. disgraceful behaviour really. you're better than that. get out and do some excercise, will help to form some positive thoughts again.