Passive aggressive - can you trust them? - boards.ie
Boards.ie uses cookies. By continuing to browse this site you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Click here to find out more x
Thread Closed  
 
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
03-10-2008, 20:35   #1
AARRRGH
Banned
 
AARRRGH's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 12,119
Passive aggressive - can you trust them?

As we all know, there are a lot of passive aggressive people out there. They smile and say "no problem" but inside they're thinking **** you, and like clockwork they'll do some sort of passive aggressive action as revenge.

Personally, I don't trust passive aggressive people. I have some friends who I would consider to be ****ed -- for example, I have an exceptionally racist friend who used to buy Al Qaeda DVD's before 9/11 -- but at least he's honest; I know where I stand.

But passive aggressive people are liars - they pretend they're nice and gentle when in fact they're just too weak to say how they really feel.

As a result of this, I don't trust passive aggressive people. Luckily they're easy to spot (they're oh so nice).

Am I right? Are the oh so nice passive aggressive people liars who can't be trusted?
AARRRGH is offline  
Advertisement
03-10-2008, 21:55   #2
stovelid
Closed Account
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 27,655
Come again?
stovelid is offline  
03-10-2008, 22:03   #3
pseudonym1
Registered User
 
pseudonym1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 1,028
Quote:
Originally Posted by stovelid View Post
Come again?



I dont think so - I am probably " oh so nice " actually thats a lie but I know people that just dont want to upset anyone including themselves due to others actions. Non confrontational folk that are not vocal about their emotions are in my opinion less threatening then al quada followers!
pseudonym1 is offline  
03-10-2008, 22:04   #4
brianthebard
Registered User
 
brianthebard's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Boho Galway, sinking into debt
Posts: 15,448
Apparently I'm passive aggressive but I'm not nice, so that's that theory out.
brianthebard is offline  
04-10-2008, 05:11   #5
Crumble Froo
Registered User
 
Crumble Froo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Posts: 11,760
what about the genuinely nice people?
Crumble Froo is offline  
Advertisement
04-10-2008, 17:05   #6
GirlInterrupted
Registered User
 
GirlInterrupted's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Dublin
Posts: 1,414
Quote:
Originally Posted by Crumble Froo View Post
what about the genuinely nice people?
I was told I was nice last night.

I guess that means I'm horrible.
GirlInterrupted is offline  
06-10-2008, 10:32   #7
AARRRGH
Banned
 
AARRRGH's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 12,119
Quote:
Originally Posted by Crumble Froo View Post
what about the genuinely nice people?
I'm not talking about genuinely nice people, I'm talking about passive aggressive people.

Why would I have a problem with genuinely nice people?
AARRRGH is offline  
06-10-2008, 10:37   #8
Mena
Registered User
 
Mena's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: 32.1819, -22.7967
Posts: 2,648
Quote:
Originally Posted by AARRRGH View Post
I'm not talking about genuinely nice people, I'm talking about passive aggressive people.

Why would I have a problem with genuinely nice people?
Ah but ARE they genuinely nice or are they just passive aggressive people you've not weeded out yet?
Mena is offline  
07-10-2008, 15:32   #9
AARRRGH
Banned
 
AARRRGH's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 12,119
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mena View Post
Ah but ARE they genuinely nice or are they just passive aggressive people you've not weeded out yet?


They might be nice. I know there are some genuinely nice/chilled people out there.

I think in general though, if someone is "too nice" there is something odd going on there, for example, they had violent parents and have reacted by becoming the opposite of them, e.g. no negative emotions.

You can generally tell passive aggressive people as their mouth is saying one thing while their eyes say something else...
AARRRGH is offline  
Advertisement
07-10-2008, 18:07   #10
anonymous_joe
Registered User
 
anonymous_joe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2005
Posts: 17,254
Send a message via MSN to anonymous_joe
If someone's actually passive aggressive then it can be very dangerous.

I've seen people have huge arguments because someone suddenly goes mad, seemingly from nowhere. It's troublesome.
anonymous_joe is offline  
13-10-2008, 15:10   #11
bigstar
Registered User
 
bigstar's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Dublin Fair City
Posts: 1,023
Quote:
Originally Posted by AARRRGH View Post


You can generally tell passive aggressive people as their mouth is saying one thing while their eyes say something else...
id be more afraid of you then!
bigstar is offline  
13-10-2008, 21:30   #12
irish_bob
Registered User
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Posts: 4,260
Quote:
Originally Posted by AARRRGH View Post
As we all know, there are a lot of passive aggressive people out there. They smile and say "no problem" but inside they're thinking **** you, and like clockwork they'll do some sort of passive aggressive action as revenge.

Personally, I don't trust passive aggressive people. I have some friends who I would consider to be ****ed -- for example, I have an exceptionally racist friend who used to buy Al Qaeda DVD's before 9/11 -- but at least he's honest; I know where I stand.

But passive aggressive people are liars - they pretend they're nice and gentle when in fact they're just too weak to say how they really feel.

As a result of this, I don't trust passive aggressive people. Luckily they're easy to spot (they're oh so nice).

Am I right? Are the oh so nice passive aggressive people liars who can't be trusted?


not sure the people you are describing are passive agressives , i would class a passive agressive as someone who was arrogant yet easily humbled who after showing assertiveness , 2 seconds later comes over all appeasing , passive agressive people are fickle , in my opinion , half the population of this country are passive agressive

the people you describe are just underhanded and sneaky
irish_bob is offline  
14-10-2008, 11:32   #13
WindSock
Closed Account
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 8,425
I am passive - aggressive - assertive. A walking contradiction, but I am one of those nicey nice people in general, sometimes I am genuine, othertimes I bitch behind backs while I am smiling or else there are times when I say straight out what I think and people tell me I am very harsh.
WindSock is offline  
15-10-2008, 23:10   #14
simu
Closed Account
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Posts: 10,144
Many passive-aggressive people don't necessarily understand and analyse their actions - they just act that way because it works for them as a coping strategy in life. Can you take that sort of stuff personally?

Wiki (o wise one) defines passive agressivity thus:

Quote:
Originally Posted by wiki
Passive-aggressive behavior refers to passive, sometimes obstructionist resistance to following authoritative instructions in interpersonal or occupational situations. It can manifest itself as learned helplessness, procrastination, stubbornness, resentment, sullenness, or deliberate/repeated failure to accomplish requested tasks for which one is (often explicitly) responsible. It is a defense mechanism, and (more often than not) only partly conscious. For example, suppose someone does not wish to attend a party. A passive-aggressive response in that situation might involve taking so long to get ready that the party is nearly over by the time they arrive.
It's not quite the same as being two-faced (which nearly everyone is, to some degree)
simu is offline  
15-10-2008, 23:15   #15
J.S. Pill
Registered User
 
J.S. Pill's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Cork
Posts: 1,185
Quote:
Originally Posted by AARRRGH View Post
They smile and say "no problem" but inside they're thinking **** you,
i.e. anyone who has a boss??
J.S. Pill is offline  
Thread Closed

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search