[caprilicious]

Edel I definitely think if you're happy with your current set up then leave things as is. If it aint broke, don't fix it!
I don't understand why some (albeit well intended!) people can have such an obsession with how other people's kids sleep!

I had similar advice proferred to me about our daughter, except I was advised to give her Phenergen.
At the time I didn't realise what it was, it's supposed to be a fairly strong antithistimine. It's also the drug they gave me in hospital to put me to sleep when I was having mild contractions
Definitely not something you'd want to use as a sleep aid for a child.
The person that recommended it to me had been using it for their own child too when he was about a year old.

What bugged me most about that offer of advice & others was that I'm perfectly happy with our set up.
When our daughter slept in her own room, she would wake several times during the night regardless of what technique we tried.
When she sleeps in the room with us, we get a solid 12-14 hours sleep.

[edellc]

I do find it quite annoying that everyone has something to say about his sleeping habits and its not that I bang on about it I dont.

It only came to the inlaws attention as I had to stay with them for a couple of nights, and for the whole time I was there the sister in law kept telling me about dozol and how she used it all the time and she has even told my OH to let my boy stay with her for a week and we will have a different child on his return over my dead body will she ever have my child on his own, the though of him crying himself to sleep and desperate for me to comfort him, while she is preparing the dozol down stairs makes me feel physically ill

And my sister is only aware of it as she keeps ringing me during our late morning nap and gives out that I shouldnt be having a nap and should be up doing housework and if I am having a nap due to not sleeping at night cause my little boy keeps waking up then I need (yes Need) to give him Phenergen...yes she gives her 7year old it nearly every other night and says its okay cause she is a single mam so she needs some time away from him....I did think that school was her time away form him but i'm obviously wrong with that one

We did however have a bit of a sleepless night last night himself was awake for nearly 2 hours bouncing up and down and singing his head off so a bit tired today so roll on nap time

[dublinlady]

Originally Posted by edellc

I do find it quite annoying that everyone has something to say about his sleeping habits and its not that I bang on about it I dont.

It only came to the inlaws attention as I had to stay with them for a couple of nights, and for the whole time I was there the sister in law kept telling me about dozol and how she used it all the time and she has even told my OH to let my boy stay with her for a week and we will have a different child on his return over my dead body will she ever have my child on his own, the though of him crying himself to sleep and desperate for me to comfort him, while she is preparing the dozol down stairs makes me feel physically ill

And my sister is only aware of it as she keeps ringing me during our late morning nap and gives out that I shouldnt be having a nap and should be up doing housework and if I am having a nap due to not sleeping at night cause my little boy keeps waking up then I need (yes Need) to give him Phenergen...yes she gives her 7year old it nearly every other night and says its okay cause she is a single mam so she needs some time away from him....I did think that school was her time away form him but i'm obviously wrong with that one

We did however have a bit of a sleepless night last night himself was awake for nearly 2 hours bouncing up and down and singing his head off so a bit tired today so roll on nap time

Ah god - tell them to mind their own bloody business!!! Stick to ur guns and do what's suits u and ur little one!!!

I have one family member who keeps insisting I replace my girls 5am bottle with water - she's only 14 weeks and goes down from 11pm - I know she's doing great and think its unfair to expect more!!
Some ppl are just daft

[January]

Originally Posted by edellc

I do find it quite annoying that everyone has something to say about his sleeping habits and its not that I bang on about it I dont.

It only came to the inlaws attention as I had to stay with them for a couple of nights, and for the whole time I was there the sister in law kept telling me about dozol and how she used it all the time and she has even told my OH to let my boy stay with her for a week and we will have a different child on his return over my dead body will she ever have my child on his own, the though of him crying himself to sleep and desperate for me to comfort him, while she is preparing the dozol down stairs makes me feel physically ill

And my sister is only aware of it as she keeps ringing me during our late morning nap and gives out that I shouldnt be having a nap and should be up doing housework and if I am having a nap due to not sleeping at night cause my little boy keeps waking up then I need (yes Need) to give him Phenergen...yes she gives her 7year old it nearly every other night and says its okay cause she is a single mam so she needs some time away from him....I did think that school was her time away form him but i'm obviously wrong with that one

We did however have a bit of a sleepless night last night himself was awake for nearly 2 hours bouncing up and down and singing his head off so a bit tired today so roll on nap time

God the poor child... There are much better ways than medicating your child to sleep train them... especially at seven years old!

[edellc]

I know January I have said it but as she has a 7year old and has reared him by herself and I only have a 21mth old then as she sees it I know nothing and I am also with my babas daddy so in her mind I shouldnt need to drug my child but its okay for her as she is a single mother I do wonder how I am related to her half the time

[pwurple]

OP, i read your description of your night, and tbh I would be shattered tired from that. We all need sleep. Awake three times a night is a lot for both of you.

Anyway, i am in no way an advocate of either drugging children to sleep, or crying it out.

But maybe something simple like a comfy chair for you in the baby room would help. Let him settle on your lap in the chair, then back into the cot for a few nights. That may be the next step for getting used to staying in the room. falling asleep in your bed, and then waking up somewhere else would be pretty disconcerting for a lot of adults. Let alone a baby.

Or leave it as is if it suits you of course.

[JimsAlterEgo]

Originally Posted by January

God the poor child... There are much better ways than medicating your child to sleep train them... especially at seven years old!

Theres a strong case for reporting both of them.

[edellc]

Originally Posted by JimsAlterEgo

Theres a strong case for reporting both of them.

I am by no means agreeing with what my sister does but seriously reporting her is just laughable

It seems any mother I have around me has given dozol or the like to their kids at some stage in the hope of their kid sleeping, yes giving it to a 7year old is not right, my sister in law gives it to her 7year old as well. My other sister in law has used it on all her kids from when they where 3mths old to "get them into a routine" Its more about being uneducated about the product than anything else, because if you google it you will see plenty of forums with people asking about it as a sleeping aid, all thinking that it is when it actually is a pain relief with something in it that makes kids drousey ( I googled and am now educated about it, thankfully I have never used it)

I mean its not child abuse its just bad parenting, what is a social worker going to do about it, and why would I waste their resources when there are many kids getting abused, starved and god only knows what else

If I was to report every time I seen my scobie neighbour smack the legs off her kids who are about 3 and 4 the social services would laugh at me

I do not agree with hitting kids and would and have never ever done it but its not my place to say how another discipline's their child, or what they use to help their kids sleep at night, I know that when I was a kid I got smacked by my dad (who didnt in the 70's/80's) and it did my no harm apart from a few bad memories.

Believe me I am in no way making light of the subject but real child abuse or neglect does not include giving your child dozol

[amyjtyrrell]

Originally Posted by edellc

So I stayed with relatives the other week and they where shocked that my little fella 21mths doesn't sleep through the night

Usual routine is
bed at 8pm
asleep by 8.30pm at the latest 9pm
wakes up around 4hours later usually between midnight and 1.30am
I give him his soother back and lie him down, he wont go back asleep but is by no means wide awake
(Bold me) I take him in with me we lie down for a 20mins or so and he is out of it again so I transfer him back to his cot
He sleeps for around and hour and is awake again, looking to be picked up(bold me) I do this , lie down in my bed he goes asleep again I put him back in his cot and the process starts again
Some times on the second pick up I just leave him in with me as I have fallen asleep and we both sleep soundly until around 7am

Now this has been the way since he was born, I breast feed and did take him in with me but never ever let him sleep with me as it was too dangerous, but as he got older he kept getting sick (chest infections) turns out he has asthma and with teething and bold me just took him in with me as I was just so knackered
Now he has a bad sleeping habit my fault I know

Anyway I know what a lot of people think about the crying and self soothing method but I really disagree with it regardless of what anyone says I am not doing it

My sister in law said to use dozol for a few nights to help establish a new sleeping pattern if I didnt want to let him cry it out, I know I should not be using this stuff until he is 2+ and as far as I know it is not a sleeping aid anyway

I am not complaining about my child waking up obviously if he slept through the night that would be great but I believe that eventually he will find his own way and sleep successfully

So after that long story, I suppose what I want to know is this
What if any are peoples experiences with dozol and the like?
Does it help establish a sleep pattern if the toddler keeps waking
And if I was to administer it once my child is 2years old is it given when he is going to bed, when he has no issue going to sleep or at 1.30am when he is awake and wont settle back to sleep in his cot?

I am so glad that I read thus post it is exactly the way my son is 19months. We tried everything to get him to sleep in his own bed n nothin worked I briefly tried the crying it out method but the poor child was literally traumatised he wouldn't leave my side all the next day and was very jumpy, which is so unlike him, the guilt was horrible :-(

He has also started waking up while in our bed too so doesn't matter where he is he will wake but at least if he's in our bed we aren't getting up and down.

A lot of my friends and family had baby's at the same time as me and they are full of advice because their baby's are perfect sleepers. I used to get really upset and try every method they suggested as I felt like I was failing in some way but iv come to the conclusion that every child is different and he's hardly goin to be an 18yr old Stoll in mammy n daddy's bed!!!!

But defiently feels better to know we are not the only ones!!!! Hope it makes u feel better too x

[CaraMay]

Op if baby is sleeping as much as he wants and when he wants during the day then there is no motivation for him to sleep all night. The morning nap is telling his body that even if he doesnt sleep during the night that he will get the nap to compensate. If you dont mind waking up all night then keep doing what you are doing.

[littlemissfixit]

Originally Posted by pwurple

OP, i read your description of your night, and tbh I would be shattered tired from that. We all need sleep. Awake three times a night is a lot for both of you.

Anyway, i am in no way an advocate of either drugging children to sleep, or crying it out.

But maybe something simple like a comfy chair for you in the baby room would help. Let him settle on your lap in the chair, then back into the cot for a few nights. That may be the next step for getting used to staying in the room. falling asleep in your bed, and then waking up somewhere else would be pretty disconcerting for a lot of adults. Let alone a baby.

Or leave it as is if it suits you of course.

I will go along the lines of most post, if it doesn't bother you then let everyone think whatever they want. That said its easier said than done, I have quite judgemental inlaws and I know that their comments would get to me even if I didn't want to.

Your child as no "problem" with sleep, and even if he had, I don't believe meds are a way to go at all! I say he has no problem because the only reason he doesn't go back to sleep himself is because he much prefers being brought into your bed and cuddle up (as you do maybe too ).
The only thing I always have at the back of my mind when it comes to my kids habits is, the longer it goes on, the harder it is on all parties to change it... with that in mind, I would think that maybe when he's 4 you'll not want him to be coming into bed at every hour of the night... but then I don't know, do they grow out of that? My friend's son is four and they have to lie with him every night and wake up with him every morning, its just not something I would want.

Whenever your ready, as pwurple says, a progression from your room to his etc. is what I would go for.

[rosebush]

Op you seem happy with your child's routine so don't worry about it.

However I wouldn't be so quick to judge people who 'drug up' their children with dozol. A friend of mine had literally not one full nights sleep in a year since her child was born and was very sick with her second pregnancy. Her doctor
recommended that she use dozol to help her 1 year old to sleep and she did.

I wouldn't judge her and call her a bad parent for doing so as I know what serious sleep deprivation was doing to her and I know that she is an excellent, loving mother.

[Oral Slang]

Hopefully the OP's baby is now sleeping - seeing as this thread is now over 10 months old!!!! Maybe she can come on & update us & let us know that there is light at the end of the tunnel

I have the same thing in my house. My 17 month old is still waking 3 times a night & would like to reduce this if not completely solve it. Totally against crying it out though, so difficult to nip it in the bud. Still bfed, so I know thats the issue, but hoping to try & start refusing at least 1 feed a night soon, so hoping that she will stop waking if there's nothing there for her. She used to settle for her daddy, but only mammy will do nowadays.

[dollybird2]

Oral Slang - have you tried replacing a feed with another sleep "trigger"? I had the same problem with my 17 month old sleeping. I reduced the snuggling and picking up at the same times each night gradually with a singing teddy, called Scout I think?! It does a 10 minute bedtime lullaby routine so when my lady woke I would settle her back into the cot, pat her a couple of times to calm her and play the teddy. It worked and finally after 17 months I get to sleep a full night!

Now there's still nights that it isn't effective but on the whole the new routine has made life a lot easier.