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My wife's breast cancer ordeal.

  • 23-12-2011 3:11pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 2,526 ✭✭✭


    On the advice of tbh I have decided to start this thread on my wifes ordeal with her recently discovered breast cancer.

    I originally posted this in the "worried about lump" thread and I think if would be unfair to continue on that thread because not all lumps are cancerous.

    We were in the hospital yesterday for two scans, a bone scan and a CAT scan. We also seen the social worker asigned to her and to be honest I was glad we talked with her.

    We got the bone scan results yesterday and it was all clear :). They did not have the CAT scan results and sent us home.

    After an anxious night they called her this morning with the best Christmas present that we could hope for under the circumstances ALL CLEAR on the CAT scan. We hugged and cryed for about an hour after the call and told all our family. At least we can enjoy Christmas with our babies who for the first time this year are very much into Santa.

    The road ahead is very much clear now and we know what's ahead. She will get her surgery on the 5th of Jan and 5 months (at least) of Chemo 3 weeks later. Followed by radiation theropy and hormone treatment thrown in there aswel.

    I would like to thank all the posters from the "worried about lump" thread for all there kind words.

    I will post udates as time goes by on her condition and ordeal, It has been the longest and most stressfull 2 weeks in my life so far and I encourage others in the same situation to come on and let us know your ordeal.

    Merry Christmas to one and all.


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Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 393 ✭✭skippy2


    Great to hear your wifes good news hope you have a lovely christmas


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,128 ✭✭✭cynder


    Great news, hope you have a good christmas.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,683 ✭✭✭Carpenter


    Have a read of my wife's blog (Man I know how you feel) I thought the worst but after you read it all will be explained also get your wife to read it after yourself if you feel it might help.
    Best of luck and a happy Christmas to you all


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,526 ✭✭✭JohnnieK


    Carpenter wrote: »
    Have a read of my wife's blog (Man I know how you feel) I thought the worst but after you read it all will be explained also get your wife to read it after yourself if you feel it might help.
    Best of luck and a happy Christmas to you all

    Hi Carpenter

    Where will I find your wifes blog?

    Merry Christmas to you and yours too.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,683 ✭✭✭Carpenter


    JohnnieK wrote: »
    Hi Carpenter

    Where will I find your wifes blog?

    Merry Christmas to you and yours too.

    http://thestoryofmybreast.blogspot.com/

    Here you go chap


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  • Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 7,458 Mod ✭✭✭✭CathyMoran


    As the 5 year survivor of another cancer (oesophageal) I know how scary it is - am delighted that you got good results :D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 23 jimmydec


    Courage,strength and believe or not a sense of humour are important- sound like you have a strong relationship which gives you a great base to start with


  • Registered Users Posts: 18,562 ✭✭✭✭The Princess Bride


    Hope all goes well for you both today,Johnnie.
    My thoughts and prayers are with you.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,526 ✭✭✭JohnnieK


    Thanks msthe80s.
    Brought her in at 7am this morning. She was very upset this morning, I think it has finally sunk in with her that she has what she has and the fact she will be loosing 1 of her breasts. I have just rang the hospital and she has not come back up to ward yet so I'm paceing my mothers living room.

    As jimmydec said we also need a sens of humor and we definatly have that, it's regarded within the close family circles as the bold boob and it always gets a laugh.

    My wife has always found it hard to express her inner feelings. Her mother walked out when she was only 12 years old and it has adversley affected her and it's this i'm worried about. She would always bottle it up and would be strong for her two sisters and never think about her self. She will definatly need some councelling after this.

    She reared her little sister since she was 12 and for this to happen to her is so unfair in light of what she has been through in her life.

    I'll keep you posted.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,526 ✭✭✭JohnnieK


    Post op and my wife is doing great. I am so proud of her. After I left her in the morning she was still crying and upset. In theatre prep the consultant sat with her and reassured her that everything was going to be ok. He said "when you wake up the desies will be gone" I think this was a lovely thing to say to her.

    Have to admit the TLC we have got from Beaumont has been second to none so far.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 23 jimmydec


    Hang in there. Your doing great so far in a difficult situation.


  • Posts: 6,025 ✭✭✭[Deleted User]


    Hi, just came across your post. Delighted all seems to be going well. Best of luck to your wife, and indeed yourself. She is very lucky to have you with her :)

    have a great New year.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,980 ✭✭✭Kevster


    Hi Johnnie, lovely to hear about your successful story. I'm in the UK (originally from Kildare) just finishing my PhD on breast cancer, and will be starting a 5-year postdoctoral scientist role on March 1st. Research in breast cancer moves so quickly - and is so well-funded - that if you miss even a single day you are already out of date.

    Good luck to you, your wife, and family.
    Kevin


  • Registered Users Posts: 53 ✭✭purrrfect1


    Glad to hear all going well after surgery.
    I had mastectomy on the 5th Dec last - so I know exactly all the emotions that your wife is experiencing.
    Everyday is am improvement. Chin up and find something to chuckle at everyday!!


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,526 ✭✭✭JohnnieK


    Her recovery is going well so far. There was nothing in the drain on Sunday morning and it worried us a bit so we went back into the hospital. They said there was nothing in the drain because there was nothing to drain so they removed it.

    That lifted her spirit a bit and it's been lifted even more since the kiddies came back home. It's great to have them here with us. Our oldest who is nearly 4 is even helping her with her pysio it's comical.

    She has no pain and her arm is not that stiff. The next step will be the chemo.

    @ purrfect1
    I hope your recovery is going well and fast. Are you due to start chemo soon?


  • Registered Users Posts: 53 ✭✭purrrfect1


    JohnnieK wrote: »
    Her recovery is going well so far. There was nothing in the drain on Sunday morning and it worried us a bit so we went back into the hospital. They said there was nothing in the drain because there was nothing to drain so they removed it.

    That lifted her spirit a bit and it's been lifted even more since the kiddies came back home. It's great to have them here with us. Our oldest who is nearly 4 is even helping her with her pysio it's comical.

    She has no pain and her arm is not that stiff. The next step will be the chemo.

    @ purrfect1
    I hope your recovery is going well and fast. Are you due to start chemo soon?
    Thanks
    Will find out tomorrow what is next. I get results of FiSH test.............fingers crossed


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,683 ✭✭✭Carpenter


    JohnnieK wrote: »
    Her recovery is going well so far. There was nothing in the drain on Sunday morning and it worried us a bit so we went back into the hospital. They said there was nothing in the drain because there was nothing to drain so they removed it.

    That lifted her spirit a bit and it's been lifted even more since the kiddies came back home. It's great to have them here with us. Our oldest who is nearly 4 is even helping her with her pysio it's comical.

    She has no pain and her arm is not that stiff. The next step will be the chemo.

    @ purrfect1
    I hope your recovery is going well and fast. Are you due to start chemo soon?

    We are watching this so you 2 are not alone tell her when it comes to reconstruction she can have a belly tuck and a boob job all in 1 my wife found that funny and a laugh is worth a lot :D


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,683 ✭✭✭Carpenter


    How are things over the last few day,s


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,526 ✭✭✭JohnnieK


    purrrfect1 wrote: »
    Thanks
    Will find out tomorrow what is next. I get results of FiSH test.............fingers crossed

    I hope everything went well for you yesterday.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,526 ✭✭✭JohnnieK


    Everything is going well so far. On Wednesday there was some fluid there so they drained it with a syringe and the colour was right and she appears to be healing well. She is going back tomorrow to get results of the tissue tests to see what the next step will be.

    I'm a bit anxious because I cant be there with her as I have a job I'm committed to and cant get out of it. Her little sister is going in with her and she knows the medical jargon as she works in Crumlin Hospital.

    I suppose I will just have to keep the head down and wait for the call.

    To make matters worse our 2 year old got a tummy bug today and she was unable to cuddle her which peed her off.

    Thanks for all your comments by the way. This thread is giving me a good avenue for getting it all of my chest:)


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  • Registered Users Posts: 2,683 ✭✭✭Carpenter


    Listen there will be low & high times that I can tell you so you may get used to it as soon as you can I don't want to sound bad but that's the way it is.
    Try staying positive I know its hard but if you can it will do wonders for her & yourself and please god she will be fine.
    It,s a long road but there is light at the end


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,526 ✭✭✭JohnnieK


    JohnnieK wrote: »
    Everything is going well so far. On Wednesday there was some fluid there so they drained it with a syringe and the colour was right and she appears to be healing well. She is going back tomorrow to get results of the tissue tests to see what the next step will be.

    I'm a bit anxious because I cant be there with her as I have a job I'm committed to and cant get out of it. Her little sister is going in with her and she knows the medical jargon as she works in Crumlin Hospital.

    I suppose I will just have to keep the head down and wait for the call.

    To make matters worse our 2 year old got a tummy bug today and she was unable to cuddle her which peed her off.

    Thanks for all your comments by the way. This thread is giving me a good avenue for getting it all of my chest:)

    She seen the surgeon today. There was 17 lymph nodes taken out 6 of which were infected. The 3rd smaller lump was pre cancerous. The liver will be investigated further but we knew that before Christmas from the cat scan. We were told that it is probably a bit of fatty tissue and 90% of us have it.

    Im worried about this now although the surgeon said he is quite confident the liver is fine.

    Anyway back in in 2 weeks to discuss the chemotherapy.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,683 ✭✭✭Carpenter


    JohnnieK wrote: »
    She seen the surgeon today. There was 17 lymph nodes taken out 6 of which were infected. The 3rd smaller lump was pre cancerous. The liver will be investigated further but we knew that before Christmas from the cat scan. We were told that it is probably a bit of fatty tissue and 90% of us have it.

    Im worried about this now although the surgeon said he is quite confident the liver is fine.

    Anyway back in in 2 weeks to discuss the chemotherapy.

    If it,s any help my wife's count was a lot higher on the lymph nodes front a lot higher


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,526 ✭✭✭JohnnieK


    We had a bad day emotionally today. She is overwhelmed with all the text messages of support and wishes people would leave her alone. I was upset because I feel helpless to help her.

    I suppose we are going to have up's and downs and this was just one of the downs.

    @Carpenter. The fear I had about the liver has subsided some what since you said your wife's count was higher. Thanks for that.

    Now I'm feeling why us:(


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Politics Moderators, Recreation & Hobbies Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators, Regional East Moderators Posts: 12,108 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dizzyblonde


    I'm sorry to hear yesterday was tough, I suppose your wife just wants to be treated normally by people. Don't be afraid to ask people to back off if necessary.
    As her husband of course you're frustrated at not being able to help her, but just being there and giving her your love and support as you are, is enough. When someone is ill it's often the little mundane things that matter the most.

    I hope today is better for you both.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,526 ✭✭✭JohnnieK


    The rest of the weekend has been fine thank God. She finally opened up to me this evening and showed me the scarring. I think it has made her feel better that I have seen and accepted it and it is another page in the book turned over.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,683 ✭✭✭Carpenter


    JohnnieK wrote: »
    The rest of the weekend has been fine thank God. She finally opened up to me this evening and showed me the scarring. I think it has made her feel better that I have seen and accepted it and it is another page in the book turned over.

    Well how are things going now


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,526 ✭✭✭JohnnieK


    Everything was going great up till about 20 mins ago. She got the medical report of the consultant on Friday for a serious illness policy we have. I read it an I'm feeling afraid at the moment, is this normal? A lot of it I dont under stand full of big words and stuff. She still has not received an appointment for the MRI for the liver and no word from the oncology which was supposed to be Wednesday.

    I suppose I'm just feeling the longer things take the less of a chance she will have of making a full recovery.

    Am I being silly??


  • Registered Users Posts: 53 ✭✭purrrfect1


    Never silly. Its just one of the many emotions that we go through.
    These documents are always baffling to read. Just the jargon thats used. Hopefully it will be Ok. Oncology just phoned me on Tues for an appointment the next day - they wont contact you till they have all results ready., which is all good.
    Dont get down now...you have been doing so good


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  • Registered Users Posts: 2,526 ✭✭✭JohnnieK


    O.K. My wife seen the surgeon last Friday week, he told her that the liver will be looked at again which we knew before Christmas. (fatty tissue we all have it, just want to take it out of the equation) We were told she will see the oncologist this Wednesday, now this might not happen because the oncologist will want to have all findings in front of him before he determines a treatment plan (which makes sense).

    Absolutely no word from the hospital as of yet. My wife got a missed call from breast care on Friday when she rang back no answer so left a message.

    No word today so she rang twice, no answer. Left a message the first time and then got them to page the bleep number the second.

    I am livid to say the least. Is it normal for this to happen.

    My worry is if this cursed cancer managed to move to the liver, with this delay it might become well established.

    I'm so angry right now.


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