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Ugly birds- why do lads bother?

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  • Registered Users Posts: 130 ✭✭jammie


    Good one ANTI :D have to agree nothing looks worse, why does any girl/female want to look like that eeeeeeeeeeewwwwwwwwwwwww it embarrasses me :confused:


  • Moderators, Regional East Moderators Posts: 21,502 Mod ✭✭✭✭Agent Smith


    well, isnt beauty in the eyes of the beholder?


  • Registered Users Posts: 130 ✭✭jammie


    yes it is agent smith, I dont judge people on looks etc just because they have a camel toe, I just said it's disgusting and theres no excuse for jeans/trousers etc SO tight...:rolleyes:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,525 ✭✭✭vorbis


    people are being very harsh on the OP. Could be insecurity about looks coming through. I'm average looking myself and can see what the OP is talking about. He's on about girls who are seriously obese and did nothing to help their looks.

    I'm not saying girls have to plaster on make up, spend hundreds on fashion and hairstyles but theres a lot of leeway between that and having a dykish crew cut and wearing clothes that do not help your figure. That doesn't make him an incredibly shallow person. At a guess, only about 20% of girls would even fit this description. People are acting as if he is saying nearly all girls are ugly.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 21,296 ✭✭✭✭gimmick


    Issues issues issues.

    From glancing quickly over this after getting bored after the first 23 posts, is that everyone has different opinions on how one 'should look'.

    OP: That girl, and indeed her boyfriend are probably ok with how they look. So what if she looked somewhat unorthodox. They might go onto their messageboard complaining about the Armani boy and Morgan girl they saw later, and wonder how these people could be so deluded into thinking that that fashion sense makes them look good. I know i certainly dont like Morgan girls.

    Ladies : get a sense of perspective here. The OPs post wasn't having a dig, he was merely stating an opinion which, believe it or not, many many guys have. Little surprise that the majority of these fellas are single, but thats the way it is.

    Fellas : Most of you on this thread are not funny, so stop trying. Its a waste of my eyesight, and webink (if such a thing exists)


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 634 ✭✭✭AB03


    brilliant thread, OP, your almost spot on imo.

    vorbis and gimmick have made some excellent points just now that summed up how ive been thinking reading throughout this whole thread.

    I definately agree that the only reason the OP is getting such abuse is because its directed from people who are insecure about their appereance in the first place and, quite likely, would probably jump into a thread bashing stereotypical pretty men/women, on the front line.

    Im shallow, and make no bones about it. BUT on the other hand, for a serious relationship, she has to have depth and intelligence aswell.
    Ive been in a happy relationship for 2 years now, with a girl who is in my eyes very attractive (and very few of my mates disagree, and neither would most of you I would imagine). She knows Im shallow and isnt too particularly fond of that trait, but I think she secretly is a little too. In my opinion, Im fairly good looking but by no means gorgeous. I know Im not the best looking bloke out there, but far from the worst aswell.
    I also know that I could have basically any woman I wanted because Im funny, intelligant, kind, a genuinally nice person etc....
    The woman I want however has to make me laugh like I do to her, and stimulate my brain aswell as body.
    Pretty girls with no brain are quite common but in the end are only good for sex, a relationship is generally tedious and frustrating and very unfufilling.

    But thank the sweet lord, there do exist gorgeous women who are intelligant, funny, sound etc...!!
    And theres plenty out there, I think thats what the OP is after, as am I, and I think the point hes trying to make is that, all blokes should be.

    My point being, people should be just as concerned about looks as about personality in my opinion. There should be no excuse for letting your brain or your body get out of shape, imo.

    And also,
    Women,
    Dont even try to argue what is aesthetically pleasing to a bloke. Fair enough, some people will find overweight women attractive, but they are in the SEVERE MINORITY.

    I would seriously reckon that is it safe to say, 90% of straight men would find the following stereotypically beautiful women attractive:
    I could obviously keep posting similar links all day, and would be happy to if nescessary :)

    http://www.bullz-eye.com/Models/200201kathie/image.asp?theFile=b40

    http://www.the-sensual-woman.com/contents/media/1037la8667ls.jpg

    http://www.riscom.com/~none/pics/brook.jpg

    http://www.top-uk-web-design.com/g/sexy.jpg

    etc etc etc etc...


    Or alternatively just pick up *any* womens magazine and its inevitably plastered with pics of "pretty" women and their daily goings on, which in itself I find very strange.

    I dont think many blokes will find any problem deciding who is basically good looking and who isnt, especially without women in the room. There just is no argument most of the time, its plain and easy to pick good looking people of the opposite sex from bad looking. Everybody knows this deep down I think.

    I remember seeing a documentary a few years ago about obesity, maybe it was supersize me, cant remember, but anyway, a doctor in it said that he cant understand how people have the nerve to ask people to "stop smoking, youre destroying your health and your looks etc..", for whatever reason, but the same person wouldnt ever think of going to a fat person and saying "stop eating, youre destroying yourself and your looks etc..".
    His opinion was that people need to be critical to make people stop doing things. Obviously bullying is a totally different story, but telling people to cut back on their food or to wear some make up isnt always a bad thing, regardless of how the fat/ugly (or fugly haha) person chooses to recieve the information.

    Anyways, HUGE rant over, opening this reply for attack in..
    3
    2
    1


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,618 ✭✭✭Civilian_Target


    I mostly agree, AB03. I couldn't fathom a relationship with an unintelligent or unexciting girl, but I couldn't fathom one with a girl who doesn't take care of herself either.

    Fact is, someone who doesn't look after their body is immediately displaying some sort of undesireable mental trait. So I have no objection to women who display natural imperfection, such as burns, and while I still may not be physically attracted to them, I wouldn't rule out the possibility of getting together in my head. If I meet a girl with 3 chins, I most certainly do!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,230 ✭✭✭scojones


    well, isnt beauty in the eyes of the beholder?

    Beauty is in the pants of the holder.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 175 ✭✭exCrumlinBoyo


    To the OP. Mate, you are young and I had a some what same opinion as you have now. I really don’t think you have any idea of what love is to be honest simply because of your attitude. You have never felt real love for someone. To me my wife is the most beautiful, graceful lady I have ever laid eyes on. It dose not matter what or how thinks other wise, it only matters what I think. As Dessie in the Snapper said “**** what the neighbors” think. What matters is what you think and feel; nothing else should compromise how you live your life.

    Let me put a question to you? Let’s say it all works out to plan for you. You meet your supermodel beautiful trophy girl, fall head of heels in love with each other, decide to get married and start a family! Now as cruel as nature is, we loose some of our good as we get older. Your trophy wife gets pregnant, your both overjoyed. Your looking at your wife grow bigger and bigger while pregnant and is no long the slim lady you married. You think, well not to worry she will be fine when the baby comes along.. My point is women’s and men’s bodies change as we get older and mature. Your trophy wife has some baby weight after the baby is born. She will and can loose it, but gravity will take its toll and all of her lovely curves and bits a pieces will not be in the same place as they once were before! Will this bother you that your trophy wife is no longer as she was? She is the mother of your children after all. How do you see yourself in this situation OP? Will you feel the same as you do now? Remember that some women unfortunately, due to hormones and all of that stuff cannot loose the weight and put more on, what will you do then? Walk out on your wife and kids because your wife is fat?

    Conditional love is something I hope you find, because when you have conditional love for another human being, nothing matters, not what they look like now, not what they look like in the future and especially what other people think, that dose not matter one bit.

    This about it mate and good luck.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,525 ✭✭✭vorbis


    this is the kind of patronising that a lot of people are saying about the OP. Its also unconditional love. Why do people think that just because he finds some women extremely ugly then he will only go out with supermodels. Nothings stopping any girl from staying in decent shape (as in not obese).

    If the girl isn't in decent shape, the majority of guys will not be sexually attracted to her (sober;) ). Thats not shallowness, thats our wiring by nature. If a guy has a problem with this, he should mail his balls back to his mother.
    To the OP. Mate, you are young and I had a some what same opinion as you have now. I really don’t think you have any idea of what love is to be honest simply because of your attitude. You have never felt real love for someone. To me my wife is the most beautiful, graceful lady I have ever laid eyes on. It dose not matter what or how thinks other wise, it only matters what I think. As Dessie in the Snapper said “**** what the neighbors” think. What matters is what you think and feel; nothing else should compromise how you live your life.

    Let me put a question to you? Let’s say it all works out to plan for you. You meet your supermodel beautiful trophy girl, fall head of heels in love with each other, decide to get married and start a family! Now as cruel as nature is, we loose some of our good as we get older. Your trophy wife gets pregnant, your both overjoyed. Your looking at your wife grow bigger and bigger while pregnant and is no long the slim lady you married. You think, well not to worry she will be fine when the baby comes along.. My point is women’s and men’s bodies change as we get older and mature. Your trophy wife has some baby weight after the baby is born. She will and can loose it, but gravity will take its toll and all of her lovely curves and bits a pieces will not be in the same place as they once were before! Will this bother you that your trophy wife is no longer as she was? She is the mother of your children after all. How do you see yourself in this situation OP? Will you feel the same as you do now? Remember that some women unfortunately, due to hormones and all of that stuff cannot loose the weight and put more on, what will you do then? Walk out on your wife and kids because your wife is fat?

    Conditional love is something I hope you find, because when you have conditional love for another human being, nothing matters, not what they look like now, not what they look like in the future and especially what other people think, that dose not matter one bit.

    This about it mate and good luck.


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  • Moderators, Education Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 10,686 Mod ✭✭✭✭melekalikimaka


    well, isnt beauty in the eyes of the beholder?

    yes thats the case when the girl is 'ok' looking but there are girls that are just plain ugly, no amount of beholding can get around it. these are usually the ones whom cling to the guy for dear life...or even worse develop ideas of grandure that they are in fact attractive...this leads to those mingbags ya see on nights out whom try to dance sexy or flirt with guys when the sight of them does quite the opposite of arousal...


  • Registered Users Posts: 12,148 ✭✭✭✭Sangre


    Don't see how anyone would go out with someone they're not attracted to sexually. What is the point then? Just call them you're friend and leave the relief to your the 5 sisters and some visual stimulants.

    For me being overweight is the biggest turn off in a girl looks wise. I just label them as lazy, with no work ethic and with no pride in themselves. Also there is nothing worse than a fat girl making excuses about her weight e.g. 'ive a slow metabolism'

    Although if I'm attracted to a girl I don't care what other people think.

    Of course being drunk is a whole other kettle of fish


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,567 ✭✭✭mloc


    i think its important to differentiate between finding a life partner and finding someone for a more short term relationship (if a relationship at all).

    in terms of shorter term stuff, I guess some lads settle for anything, if they think they'll get a shag out of it. There are those girls that make you wonder... why, why would a guy do that to themselves. I'm sure theres guys out there that girls would think the same about.

    If I'm on a night out looking for a bit of craic, or even a girl to stick with for a while (nothing hugely serious, of course), then I wont be looking at her reading list, her lifetime acheivements or how deep she is.

    I'll be looking at if she's hot or not.


  • Moderators, Education Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 10,686 Mod ✭✭✭✭melekalikimaka


    mloc wrote:

    I'll be looking at if she's hot or not.

    you must be blind... I've seen your catches


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,567 ✭✭✭mloc


    people in glasshouses...


  • Registered Users Posts: 40,856 ✭✭✭✭Xavi6


    well, isnt beauty in the eyes of the beholder?

    God I'm sick of that phrase. Look some people are just ugly. Period. It's one of those unfortunate things in life.

    For me it's more of a case of standards than anything else. Some people go very high while others have there's around their ankles. Standards are defined by a lot of things, your mates being one of them. As the saying goes 'bro's before ho's'. The opinion of the rest of the lads is highly important, it's part of the bond we have. When you inherit a guy, you inherit his mates and their opinions too. If you don't like it tough.

    Basically what I'm tryin to say is that there are girls who just aren't cut out for it and the opinion of all guys towards them will be the same. Shallow? Yes of course it is but lets face it, girlfriends aren't just for Christmas so it's important to get it right.


  • Moderators, Education Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 10,686 Mod ✭✭✭✭melekalikimaka


    mloc wrote:
    people in glasshouses...

    ouchy thats harsh


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,666 ✭✭✭charlie_says


    I think its all about receptivness. All of it. Yep.

    BTW the OP is saying what alot of people wouldn't nowadays, you have to give credit for that. Whilst people like me are just plain vague.


  • Registered Users Posts: 17,469 ✭✭✭✭Mr. CooL ICE


    Like the OP, I'm not gonna bother sugar-coating my opinions, and am going to express them raw and simple. All the people on the first page(s) who flamed him should have realised he was speaking his mind and didn't mean to offend anyone (AFAIK), and neither do I here.

    The OP has some fair points, but I must say that guys 'who go out with ugly birds' are more-than-likely less shallow than guys who wouldn't. But it's not always the case; some might be desperate, or just plain strange, like my following friend:

    Friend of mine in college was going out with this girl from back home for a few years when I first met him. I had known him a few months before she visited him in college and we met her, but beforehand, he always talked her up as being an absolute babe. We never heard a bad word about her looks, but quite the opposite; always that she was gorgeous in every possible way. When she did eventually come down, what I saw was a 'beached whale'. She was small, quite overweight, wore unflattering clothes (tracksuit pants, etc, all the time), didnt have a nice face, and generally had no redeeming physical features whatsoever. Beauty wasnt even in the eye of the beholder here; she made no effort whatsoever to talk to her boyfriends' friends, and we found her to be generally lacking in any form of personality. Of course, we shared our opinions to him.

    Anyway, about 6 months later, they broke up. We thought he came to his senses, but literally 3 weeks later, he met another girl, whom wasnt much of an improvement (IMsexistO, of course); she was a giant, over 6ft, not overweight, but, uh, generously built. She has the type body that looked like she would break your hips if she straddled you, but she has got a pretty face and turns herself out well (despite various features like dual-treetrunks when wearing a miniskirt). But here we ago again: no personality. She treats him like shít, abuses and embarasses him in front of us, often ignores us, and generally is difficult to talk to when she doesnt. But he will still blatantly boast about how his old gf was amazing, but I quote him saying "but look at what I have now".

    Bit of a long speech, but this is an example of a guy that makes no sense. He is a good looking guy, and usually gets quite a bit of attention from ladies when he is out with us, so is not insecure about his looks.

    So to continue the OPs original point about what makes guys, etc, etc: There is an endless list of reasons, the majority being that a guy can see past a girls appearance and like them for the truly great person they might be, or that, like my friend above, be with a girl like that for seemingly no reason whatsoever, but is probably due to some sort of insecurity.

    Please excuse any bad wording... insomnia has gotten the better of me


  • Moderators, Education Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 4,436 Mod ✭✭✭✭Suaimhneach


    All blokes are fat, ugly, bad in bed, inconsiderate, selfish cnuts.

    They should all become feminists, start plucking their eyebrows and spend all of their time adoring women.

    I got bored after the first page... but trying to keep up with the Jones I thought I'd put my two cent in.

    There is a lot of threads about women here, and thats mainly to due with the ratio of men to women on the internet and indeed boards is probably 10:1, however, this does not excuse all of your blantant ignorance and huge generalisations, which you should all stick up your bum.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 36,634 ✭✭✭✭Ruu_Old


    Now you don't get any cake, Jesjes. Ah no I'm not mean, have a piece. :)


  • Moderators, Category Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 47,212 CMod ✭✭✭✭Black Swan


    I think this whole thread is a craic. The OP intended it to be, and many of the posters were just playing along. Of course, there will always be a few that get a little too serious (when AH is not intended to be so serious a forum). Correct me if I am wrong, Ruu. Oh, and don't offer me any cake, I don't eat desserts, but a tall cool one would go down nice right now (it's 11.08 PM in So Cal/OC and a little warm this night).:D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 170 ✭✭SteamTrean


    ThrownAway wrote:
    ...stop and think maybe that these ''ugly'' [although there is no such thing].....

    Yes there is, I'm with OP. Imagine Denise Richards (not actually Denise Richards but some of similar standards) walking down the street with a Richie Kavanagh lookalike, or (Jo Brand and Brad Bitt) You'd think to yourself.. OK.. they may be very funny, intelligent, nice, generous, a real humanitarian, but he/she could definitely do better. Obviously those examples are extreme but I just wanted to highlight 'ThrownAway' and 'Pink Bunny''s complete disconnect from reality. There are ugly people and certainly different standards of ugliness. You can pull a stunner that is slightly better looking than you and use you personality to maintain an equilibrium, you can also fall for someone who you might have previously thought was not your type, and have a brilliant life together.. But there are certain stinkers that would make no effort at all to look nice or to keep fit.. how these people can attract anyone other than similarly careless oafs is beyond me. Good for you OP. I don't mind getting on anyones ignore list who refuses to face facts. Pink Bunny indeed. Wouldn't it be great if we were all pink bunny's prancing around in happy land (They probably met before his horrible accident, fair play to her for being able to get passed that.. she's better than most of us). My girlfriend is hot by the way, even though I've got man boobs.. But I've a huge c0ck.
    :cool:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 546 ✭✭✭Froot


    The person you choose to be with doesn't better you as a person!

    Yes they do.

    Something as simple as validating your own self image by having an attractive partner does better you as a person.

    So in short, yore ma! obviously told you that you were cool and special when you were young.

    My ma is dead, therefore making it offensive for anyone to saying anything about her.

    +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
    +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    I had replied to JesJes's earlier post but I realised that there is no point in arguing with that kind of rubbish.

    +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
    +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
    Nightwish wrote:
    I'd be what the OP would consider ugly. Considering I wear thick rimmed black glasses and have a similar dress sense to the girl he described. My bf finds me beautiful and thats all I give a **** about. Its shallow people like the OP who will end up alone because he'll spend his life searching for the perfect woman (who doesnt exist). When you fall in love OP, you will realise that its their personality that is more important. Although you need physical attraction to the person, love is deeper than whats on the outside.

    Nobody is disputing that anybody loves you. What the OP is effectively asking is why some people look beyond genetics. It is natural to want an attractive woman (physical attraction), that is why we are here. There is no other reason for humans to be on earth other than to reproduce and produce the healthiest offspring to continue the trend. I have to say that the OP has a point. Beauty is in the eye of beholder is crap. Everyone wants an attractive woman. There is not a person on this planet who doesnt think about another partner instead of their own. Its human nature.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 29,930 ✭✭✭✭TerrorFirmer


    My last girlfriend was great looking, even if it only lasted six months.

    I see it as a victory for us "uglies" :D

    I spent enough time in the past worrying about looks...all about the personality!! (wink wink)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,107 ✭✭✭adonis


    gatecrash wrote:
    can be a picky enough crowd down there. But then again I'm not exactly Adonis either!! ;)

    But i am!!!
    im also with the OP here...I know that good looking and intelligent girls exist..im going out with one of them and i also know lots of them..

    but i wouldn't go out with an ugly or overly fat girl..sorry...dont think it makes me particularly shallow either..


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,028 ✭✭✭Hellm0


    My philosophy is this....whilst I am young and have the ability to score girl's I'm acually attracted to, I'm not very much inclined to be the aesthetically forgiving one in a relationship.
    Bottom line is, if the physical attractions not there,I'm not going to go out of my way to score a girl. I should think the same is true of most women?


  • Moderators, Education Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 4,436 Mod ✭✭✭✭Suaimhneach


    Froot wrote:

    +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
    +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    I had replied to JesJes's earlier post but I realised that there is no point in arguing with that kind of rubbish.

    +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
    +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    IRONY!!

    Pretty though...


  • Registered Users Posts: 17,410 ✭✭✭✭Blazer


    Egotron3000 notes that this thread causes confusion in its circuitry. Why are all human male optical systems not wired the same?


    best part of the thread:D


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  • Moderators, Education Moderators, Music Moderators Posts: 10,686 Mod ✭✭✭✭melekalikimaka


    Hellm0 wrote:
    My philosophy is this....whilst I am young and have the ability to score girl's I'm acually attracted to, I'm not very much inclined to be the aesthetically forgiving one in a relationship.
    Bottom line is, if the physical attractions not there,I'm not going to go out of my way to score a girl. I should think the same is true of most women?

    I just take everything I can, as in 5 years i'll regret every one of them, for the uglier ones i like to call them BPB's ( Brown Paper Baggers)


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