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a woman in a pub

  • 04-04-2014 9:12pm
    #1
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 2,011 ✭✭✭Tugboats


    Smiled at me twice today and I did nothing about it.


«1

Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 3,973 ✭✭✭Sh1tbag OToole


    how bad


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 892 ✭✭✭GenieOz


    Tugboats wrote: »
    Smiled at me twice today and I did nothing about it.

    www.tumblr.com


  • Registered Users Posts: 567 ✭✭✭.Henry Sellers.


    You'll get her next time OP, nobody should take sh1t like that.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,305 ✭✭✭131spanner


    Sounds like she's a cock-tease. Smiling and what not.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,301 ✭✭✭Daveysil15


    You'll have to settle for a tug.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 27,944 ✭✭✭✭ Kai Freezing Sleuth


    Looks like boats aren't the only things you'll be tugging tonight.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,380 ✭✭✭✭Banjo String


    Tugboats wrote: »
    Smiled at me twice today and I did nothing about it.

    Nothing?

    Didn't even sniff her seat?

    http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?p=87272544


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 18,299 ✭✭✭✭The Backwards Man


    STD test in the morning for you my boy. Better safe than sorry.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,791 ✭✭✭Sir Osis of Liver.


    A girl went into a bar and asked for a double entendre, so he gave her one.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,623 ✭✭✭thegreatgonzo


    She was probably smiling at someone behind you anyway.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 10,914 ✭✭✭✭castletownman


    U ok hun? xx


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 18,299 ✭✭✭✭The Backwards Man


    A girl went into a bar and asked for a double entendre, so he gave her one.
    Not much of a barman, the girl asked for a double.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,518 ✭✭✭stefan idiot jones


    It could have been wind.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,750 ✭✭✭john the one


    shoulda made a leggit to the jacks for a fapping, its cheaper


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,380 ✭✭✭✭Banjo String


    A roman soldier walked into a bar, stuck 2 fingers up at the barman and said "ten pints please"


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,916 ✭✭✭shopaholic01


    You missed out there. :( Smiling is our subtle, non-verbal way of letting you know we want you to put us through the headboard. Next time it happens the correct response is to grab your crotch, suggestively thrust your pelvis and grin in a lecherous manner.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 18,299 ✭✭✭✭The Backwards Man


    A man who didn't like jokes walked into a bar, ordered a pint.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 653 ✭✭✭Aphex


    Tugboats wrote: »
    Smiled at me twice today and I did nothing about it.

    Good on you for admitting it dude ;)


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,088 ✭✭✭Pug160


    Tugboats wrote: »
    Smiled at me twice today and I did nothing about it.

    Did you at least smile back? :pac:


  • Registered Users Posts: 10,914 ✭✭✭✭castletownman


    A man walks into a bar.

    He's an alcoholic whose habits are destroying his family.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,916 ✭✭✭shopaholic01


    A man walks into a bar.

    He's an alcoholic whose habits are destroying his family.
    No one is smiling at him though.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,380 ✭✭✭✭Banjo String


    Stevie wonder walked into a bar one day.

    His guide dog got sacked immediately afterwards.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,887 ✭✭✭Mariasofia


    Awaits "a man looked at me twice in a pub today thread"...... :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 774 ✭✭✭debabyjesus


    Woman in a pub = kitchen going dirty somewhere


  • Registered Users Posts: 13,589 ✭✭✭✭Aidric


    A roman soldier walked into a bar, stuck 2 fingers up at the barman and said "ten pints please"

    A man walks in to a bar and orders ten brandies. The landlady serves up ten brandies and he swiftly knocks 'em back. I shouldn't be drinking like this with what I've got he says. Why, what have you got she says? 'Fúck all' he says.

    Bernard Manning


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,512 ✭✭✭Muise...


    A man walks into a bar.

    Ouch.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 14,380 ✭✭✭✭Banjo String


    Aidric wrote: »
    A man walks in to a bar and orders ten brandies. The landlady serves up ten brandies and he swiftly knocks 'em back. I shouldn't be drinking like this with what I've got he says. Why, what have you got she says? 'Fúck all' he says.

    Bernard Manning

    Man walks into bar, asked the barman for a double brandy,gets handed one from barman and swiftly necks it.

    "another" says the man.

    Barman passes him another glass of brandy, which the man skulls again.

    "another" he said. Barman gives him another, he necks it again.

    The barman then tells him to take it easy or he's going to end up locked.

    The man looks up, and says "if you seen what I just seen today, you'd neck them like that too". The barman, curious, asked him what it was he seen?

    "came home from work early today, headed upstairs into the bedroom to find my wife and best friend in bed together, her naked, and him giving it to her hard from behind".

    The barman, feeling sorry for the poor guy pours him another brandy and tells him it's on the house.

    Then the barman asked him "what did you say to your wife"? The man tells him that told her to pack her bags immediately and get the hell out of the house!

    The barman, nodding said" you did right man, you did right., what about your best friend, what did you say to him?

    The man looked up to the barman, a tear in his eye and said " I looked him firmly in the eye and said BAD DOG!"


  • Registered Users Posts: 20,329 ✭✭✭✭dxhound2005


    I walked into that bar in the company of one of our Caledonian cousins and a denizen of perfidious Albion. I didn't see the smiling woman but maybe it was because I was distracted by the long faced horse, the talking duck, the lion and the giraffe.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 18,299 ✭✭✭✭The Backwards Man


    Two fish go into a bar.


    Bartender says, 'I'm not serving you, you're legless'


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,512 ✭✭✭Muise...


    Two fish go into a bar.


    Bartender says, 'I'm not serving you, you're legless'

    Legs.Eleven walks into a bar. Buys a round for the fish.


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