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The characters of your local pub/club

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Comments

  • #32
    bb1234567
    Registered Users Posts: 5,491 ✭✭✭bb1234567


    AnonoBoy wrote: »
    In our local at home there's this lad who comes in about half an hour after closing and shouts at everyone that they have to go home. If you don't leg it he takes out a notebook and starts writing down your name.

    It's hilarious. He's harmless like so they let him away with it for years but you can tell he's a bit touched. He has a special hat that he wears and everything.

    Lately though I think the owners are getting a bit sick of him because if they hear he's coming they close the blinds and everyone has to stay quiet so he won't know we're in there.

    A bit touched? He sounds insane


  • #33
    The Backwards Man
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,299 ✭✭✭✭The Backwards Man


    Patww79 wrote: »
    This post has been deleted.
    Everyone is a wanker regardless of age. You don't become a character until after you die.


  • #34
    Dozer Dave
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 491 ✭✭Dozer Dave


    The Backwards Man wrote: »
    Top shelf sellers are Jameson, Grouse and Malibu.

    Any sheep dip?


  • #35
    Birneybau
    Registered Users Posts: 10,220 ✭✭✭✭Birneybau


    The Backwards Man wrote: »
    Everyone is a wanker regardless of age. You don't become a character until after you die.

    Good point, 'a character' is usually past tense. When alive it's probably "Ah sh!te, here's your man again"


  • #36
    The Backwards Man
    Closed Accounts Posts: 18,299 ✭✭✭✭The Backwards Man


    Dozer Dave wrote: »
    Any sheep dip?
    Dunno what kinda timewarp you live in, but round here you buy that in the co-op.


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  • #37
    Dozer Dave
    Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 491 ✭✭Dozer Dave


    The Backwards Man wrote: »
    Dunno what kinda timewarp you live in, but round here you buy that in the co-op.

    Not that kind :pac:

    http://whiskeyreviewer.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/03/sheep_dip_scotch.jpg


  • #38
    Dr. Kenneth Noisewater
    Registered Users Posts: 3,236 ✭✭✭Dr. Kenneth Noisewater


    My local is grand. Very basic spot but they do a lovely pint. Craft beers will never be the order of the day. My oul fella gives out about how ****e it is but he's still over there most evenings for a couple of hours. It's just full of oul fellas who sit around taking the piss out of eachother. I like it.

    Also full of local GAA know-alls who sit around spoofing about the club scene in other counties.


  • #39
    the evasion_kid
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,740 ✭✭✭the evasion_kid


    My locals character is the bar owner himself,awful tipso his benders are legendary in the town,last time I was in it he was so pissed he got down into the cellar and couldn't get back up,four lads had to lift him out of it.another night the bar was full with people watching TV and he was scuttered,as he was walking by the TV he reefed the TV aerial cable clean out of the back of it.always keeps an eye on his wife and when she's out of sight he's straight under the spirits optics with a glass, has another look around for her again and gos back for more.


  • #40
    Steve_Carella
    Registered Users Posts: 172 ✭✭Steve_Carella


    the evasion_kid wrote: »
    My locals character is the bar owner himself,awful tipso his benders are legendary in the town,last time I was in it he was so pissed he got down into the cellar and couldn't get back up,four lads had to lift him out of it.another night the bar was full with people watching TV and he was scuttered,as he was walking by the TV he reefed the TV aerial cable clean out of the back of it.always keeps an eye on his wife and when she's out of sight he's straight under the spirits optics with a glass, has another look around for her again and gos back for more.

    So by 'character' you mean 'raging alcoholic that can barely keep it together'... :eek:


  • #41
    PTH2009
    Registered Users Posts: 37,756 ✭✭✭✭PTH2009


    I go to my dads local with himself. Its a nice pub but has a lot of craft beer drinkers and students. It's always busy on a Friday and quite on a Sunday


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  • #42
    buried
    Registered Users Posts: 9,674 ✭✭✭buried


    These "characters" that be in these pubs are the main reason I don't go to the pub no more. Where I live its 4 pints in and these people act like the bath salt smoking "characters" out of a looney tunes comic book, 10 pints in and its verging on the full blown mental asylum candidate for life "character", and they get away with it purely for the reason they spend much of their money in these kips, so their outlandish bat$hit alcoholic behaviour is tolerated by the greedy pub owner who gobbles up their money.

    "You have disgraced yourselves again" - W. B. Yeats



  • #43
    anto9
    Registered Users Posts: 883 ✭✭✭anto9


    All expats where i live (Asia )and boring as **** charectors .(same people every week ,spouting the same old **** ).I must change pubs soon .There is a far better one ,and closer to my house ,but is currently being refurbished .


  • #44
    efb
    Closed Accounts Posts: 35,514 ✭✭✭✭efb


    The old queens in the corner bar, the twinks tearing it up on the dancefloor, the shy newbies hiding in the shadows.
    That's my local


  • #45
    porsche959
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,499 ✭✭✭porsche959


    efb wrote: »
    The old queens in the corner bar, the twinks tearing it up on the dancefloor, the shy newbies hiding in the shadows.
    That's my local

    So you're a TD then? :confused:


  • #46
    efb
    Closed Accounts Posts: 35,514 ✭✭✭✭efb


    porsche959 wrote: »
    So you're a TD then? :confused:

    No.


  • #47
    porsche959
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,499 ✭✭✭porsche959


    efb wrote: »
    No.

    Ok.


  • #48
    Jarrod
    Registered Users Posts: 500 ✭✭✭Jarrod


    Johnny Carson wrote: »
    In every local pub in Dublin there's always a Macker or a Smasher who has tattoos of a rose on his wrist and scars on his face but "is a top bloke, boss. Top bloke".

    A pub I used to frequent had a 'Mickser' who sounds roughly as you describe. One of the lads accidentally spilled a pint on his crossword one night, he was not a happy camper.


  • #49
    dandyelevan
    Closed Accounts Posts: 257 ✭✭dandyelevan


    A few years ago our old pub closed down.
    Was a place well known for its 'characters.'
    One old boy had the first 'mobile phone' in the world.
    After six pints he'd start talking into his cupped hand.
    I listened in once and he was having a long secretive (one sided) chat with his sister who had passed away yonks ago.
    Jeez, t'was scary.
    I understood he had regular 'chats with the deceased in this fashion.
    He's long dead now himself.
    Another chap, let's call him old Joe, managed to squeeze his bony ass into a freshly installed urinal in the Jacks and had a crap, even though there was a real crapper not two feet away. Anyway, the owner of the Pub was a lazy sod who never bothered cleaning the place. When old Joe died three weeks later, his crap was still languishing in the urinal as a type of memorial to his passing. It was still there when the pub closed down a year later (but it had turned a funny color)

    A female 'character' used to verbally abuse people for 'looking at her legs' !
    She accused me of this once and I told her I saw better ones hanging out of a crows nest.


  • #50
    Mint Aero
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,570 ✭✭✭Mint Aero


    I don't frequent the type of place of that which is home to the characters you speak that there of.


  • #51
    Gooners
    Closed Accounts Posts: 388 ✭✭Gooners


    AnonoBoy wrote: »
    In our local at home there's this lad who comes in about half an hour after closing and shouts at everyone that they have to go home. If you don't leg it he takes out a notebook and starts writing down your name.

    It's hilarious. He's harmless like so they let him away with it for years but you can tell he's a bit touched. He has a special hat that he wears and everything.

    Lately though I think the owners are getting a bit sick of him because if they hear he's coming they close the blinds and everyone has to stay quiet so he won't know we're in there.

    Loved this :D


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  • #52
    Filmer Paradise
    Registered Users Posts: 1,339 ✭✭✭Filmer Paradise


    Steve_Carella wrote: »
    So by 'character' you mean 'raging alcoholic that can barely keep it together'... :eek:

    That would be a 'colourful character' really.


  • #53
    arybvtcw0eolkf
    Closed Accounts Posts: 24,878 ✭✭✭✭arybvtcw0eolkf


    There's an older lad in The Gypsy Rose (Dublin) who drinks there every Saturday night.

    If you ask him anything he tries his best to answer with a line from a Thin Lizzy song, if he can't fit Thin Lizzy in it'll be Rory Gallagher.

    He's f*cking hilarious.


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