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Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

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    #422
    mickman
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,661 ✭✭✭mickman


    its also quite possible that the actual depression is what causes the chemical imbalance, not the other way around.

    when we are down our horomes or chemicals if you like to call them that act in a certain way and if this goes on for quite some time then it will lead to an imbalance. serotonin and dopamine are some of these. anti d' then force the leves of these chemicals back up again and make you feel better but unless you address the issue that caused the problem in the first place then it will just be a vicious circle

    meds most certainly have a place as they can take the person from the dark place quite rapidly as some people just wont do natural fixes like exercise etc.

    i dont believe that anyone is born with or all of a sudden has a "chemical imbalance" i believe that the person gets down, cant deal with it properly for any number of reasons and it goes on so long that they develop a "chemical imbalance"


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    #423
    princess-lala
    Closed Accounts Posts: 30,731 ✭✭✭✭princess-lala


    Up until about 4 months ago I was the happiest person going, ok things got me down but never for too long.

    Then 4 months ago everything changed. No one thing I can say made me change but I'm not the person I used to be, any little thing can set my tears off now.

    I only admitted it to myself in the past few days that I could be depressed and I know I should go to my gp but I just don't know what to say, shes always saying how smiley I am :(

    Any help or advice please.


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    #424
    C_Dawg
    Closed Accounts Posts: 431 ✭✭C_Dawg


    I think one of the best things to do is let a friend or family member know that you're not feeling great. Letting someone close know first should make it easier to talk to your doctor about. Your doctor will of heard of this issue so many times before so you've nothing to be worried or ashamed of. Hope everything goes well for you.


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    #425
    George Orwell 1982
    Closed Accounts Posts: 595 ✭✭✭George Orwell 1982


    princess-lala wrote: »
    Up until about 4 months ago I was the happiest person going, ok things got me down but never for too long.

    Then 4 months ago everything changed. No one thing I can say made me change but I'm not the person I used to be, any little thing can set my tears off now.

    I only admitted it to myself in the past few days that I could be depressed and I know I should go to my gp but I just don't know what to say, shes always saying how smiley I am :(

    Any help or advice please.

    Yep don't delay.

    Tony Bates is a clinical psychologist with St James hospital. He suffered from depression himself and has written a useful book called "Depression: The Common Sense Approach".

    Here are some tips from an interview Tony Bates did with Marian Finucane in 2009: http://www.rte.ie/radio1/marianfinucane/1185304.html

    One thing I found very useful for dealing with depression is Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction.

    The programme was originally developed for cancer patients at the University of Massachusetts Medical Centre in the 1970's and has been proven in clinical trials to significantly reduce stress and help with depression and anxiety. It now forms part of cognitive behavioural therapy for depression. You just listen to the CDs and practice the instructions for one hour a day and it will help you get through this.

    Good luck!


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    #426
    Lone Stone
    Registered Users Posts: 3,405 ✭✭✭Lone Stone


    stupidusername wrote: »
    I think that's a bit harsh.

    I've been seeing a counsellor for a few months now.It's not like I'm doing nothing. what can I do? I want to get better I just don't know how. I'm not sure my counsellor is helping.

    Sorry wasnt trying to be harsh. I just think with this kind of thing the longer you let it control the direction of your life the harder it is to try and get it back i was just trying get across how important is to push yourself even tho lack of motivation goes hand in hand with depression. You have to try and think of the positive's and find a goal for some thing you want to do in life and work towards that.

    And if you dont like your gp you should ring the clinic or where ever it is you attend and ask if any of the doctors specialise in depression or what ever the exact problem you have is. I was lucky that i managed to find a gp who was studying my specific problem and it helped me a great deal.
    Altho some doctors in this country are clueless when it come's to this sort of thing so it can be a pain in the arse it might be worth a try to just ring around different gp's and explain your situation.


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    #427
    RubyXI
    Registered Users Posts: 1,596 ✭✭✭RubyXI


    Anyone else get stressed if your routine is thrown out a bit? I never noticed it before. It's kinda like an obsessive compulsive thing and i never knew i was like that. It's not a major obsession for me. But it is a little bit.


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    #428
    MUSEIST
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,258 ✭✭✭MUSEIST


    ^^^yeah phi3 I am the same.

    I have been feeling really guilty lately, this depression lark has been going on a long time for me now and I have tried cbt and loads of medication and still nothing. I was at the doctor the other day and I feel pathetic, I still dont feel that much better and I keep thinking the doctor is sick of me at this stage.


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    #429
    mickman
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,661 ✭✭✭mickman


    phi3 wrote: »
    Anyone else get stressed if your routine is thrown out a bit? I never noticed it before. It's kinda like an obsessive compulsive thing and i never knew i was like that. It's not a major obsession for me. But it is a little bit.

    <SNIP dont make online diagnoses please> i get a bit stressed and anxious when my routinte is out of synch. only thing you can do is keep your routine as much as you can, if it gets thrown out from time to time which it will , use breathing techniques to calm you down and go for a run when you go home that evening

    thats what i do anyway and it works. losing my routine causes me to get chest tightness and all sorts, crazy but thats the way it is


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    #430
    tikkaman
    Closed Accounts Posts: 32 ✭tikkaman


    Well i've had a tough session of cbt today for what they say is social anxiety, but i don't know if i'll ever be better....!!!!

    got to the place to do the task early, walked in to get a seat, there where none, i freeked and walked out, only to have to go back in with the cbt therapist and sit at the same table as strangers...!!!!

    i feel ugly at the best of times, and worthless, and my thinking errors never seem to go.... i know i've not got out enough to combat what i'm thinking but times are tough,

    i think to myself, how am i going to meet someone if i cannot talk to them...!!!!!

    today really has taken it outta me and i'm shattered and sore though being as tense as a board....

    i feel i'll never be able to meet anyone and have a relationship... :(

    And she tells me things will get tougher....!!!!!!!!!

    i don't know if i can see this through.... :(


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    #431
    Lone Stone
    Registered Users Posts: 3,405 ✭✭✭Lone Stone


    phi3 wrote: »
    Anyone else get stressed if your routine is thrown out a bit? I never noticed it before. It's kinda like an obsessive compulsive thing and i never knew i was like that. It's not a major obsession for me. But it is a little bit.

    yea im moving out for the first time ever now with two lads from college and it's been left to me to sort out the place to move into and all that kinda stuff stressed to bits been anxtin non stop ughh nasty week, Still happy i actually managed to do it by myself.


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    #432
    MUSEIST
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,258 ✭✭✭MUSEIST


    tikkaman wrote: »
    Well i've had a tough session of cbt today for what they say is social anxiety, but i don't know if i'll ever be better....!!!!

    got to the place to do the task early, walked in to get a seat, there where none, i freeked and walked out, only to have to go back in with the cbt therapist and sit at the same table as strangers...!!!!

    i feel ugly at the best of times, and worthless, and my thinking errors never seem to go.... i know i've not got out enough to combat what i'm thinking but times are tough,

    i think to myself, how am i going to meet someone if i cannot talk to them...!!!!!

    today really has taken it outta me and i'm shattered and sore though being as tense as a board....

    i feel i'll never be able to meet anyone and have a relationship... :(

    And she tells me things will get tougher....!!!!!!!!!

    i don't know if i can see this through.... :(


    i found cbt so difficult and in the end i gave up feeling like a failure.

    please stick with it, it will get easier as time goes on and you will soon feel better about your self.


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    #433
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Not being able to sleep at night isnt good for the mind. I just cant stop the ruminating. I.feel.like.****.


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    #434
    tikkaman
    Closed Accounts Posts: 32 ✭tikkaman


    MUSEIST wrote: »
    i found cbt so difficult and in the end i gave up feeling like a failure.

    please stick with it, it will get easier as time goes on and you will soon feel better about your self.



    i hope your right, things cam to a head when i met someone on a photography forum, We talked and got real close, We both decided to meet up in ireland as shes in england, i booked a nice cottage with stunning views...

    and things just built and built until my heatlh suffered, and i felt i couldn't see her, and that she would run a mile...

    i know i hurt her as she cried her eyes out, i feel so ****ing ugly within myself.....

    And just felt i couldn't hold conversation when she landed !!!!!

    So at the last few days i bottled out... :( been feeling like this thing will never pass me by, and some sessions of CBT make me feel terrible, as i judge myself as NOT NORMAL, because i cannot simply meet a female...


    tikkaman.


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    #435
    Bebs
    Closed Accounts Posts: 111 ✭✭Bebs


    Could anyone tell me a bit about CBT?


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    #436
    tikkaman
    Closed Accounts Posts: 32 ✭tikkaman


    CBT,

    you sit down with your therapist talk about what you find tough, and work on a plan of tasks to get you through it, they may be small, but will have meaning, and you will fill out sheets as to what your feeling, thinking, how nervous you are, etc, and they will point out your thinking error's if you find it difficult to see them for yourself...

    tasks may be repeated so as you learn whats going on around you, and see that others are not concerned about what you may think they are...

    you may learn calming techniques if you are in a stressed situation....
    each person will have different anxieties and you will find a way to work on your own with the therapist...

    You WILL need to be strong as i have figured out recently, its not easy, and you will have to be strong...

    i just hope i have the courage to see it through...


    Tikkaman.


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    #437
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    I'm starting group CBT on Thursday for Social Anxiety Disorder and I'm terrified!


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    #438
    mickman
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,661 ✭✭✭mickman


    Nervous85 wrote: »
    I'm starting group CBT on Thursday for Social Anxiety Disorder and I'm terrified!

    why?


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    #439
    RubyXI
    Registered Users Posts: 1,596 ✭✭✭RubyXI


    mickman wrote: »
    why?

    Would have thought the clue was in the question.


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    #440
    RubyXI
    Registered Users Posts: 1,596 ✭✭✭RubyXI


    Nervous85 wrote: »
    I'm starting group CBT on Thursday for Social Anxiety Disorder and I'm terrified!

    Major kudos for doing it. Best of luck.


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    #441
    stupidusername
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    my new doctor has upped my efexor to 150mg.I'll be starting it tomorrow. if this doesn't help, I'm going to come off it all in a while.


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    #442
    stupidusername
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    I wish I could stop getting thrown into these lows. Am having a rough time lately though.


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    #443
    Princess Peach
    Registered Users Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    stupidusername wrote: »
    I wish I could stop getting thrown into these lows. Am having a rough time lately though.

    I'm the same! I was doing great for ages and now everything is just going wrong :( And I still dont know how to pull myself out of it


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    #444
    C_Dawg
    Closed Accounts Posts: 431 ✭✭C_Dawg


    How is everyone handling relationships with friends and family while being depressed?


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    #445
    RubyXI
    Registered Users Posts: 1,596 ✭✭✭RubyXI


    C_Dawg wrote: »
    How is everyone handling relationships with friends and family while being depressed?

    I'm fine with my family but I have no real friends because of it.


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    #446
    Princess Peach
    Registered Users Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    C_Dawg wrote: »
    How is everyone handling relationships with friends and family while being depressed?

    I've basically stopped talking to my friends. Firstly I dont think its fair on them to have to be around me while I'm like this, no need to bring them down. And I cant talk to them about how I'm feeling cause they don't understand. I tried to and one friend called me dramatic, the other told our friend she hates how I'm so negative. So I've just taken myself out of the picture till I can sort myself out.

    My family doesn't know about my medication or counselling, I just try and put on a brave face and stay out of their way most of the time

    Probably not the healthiest way to deal but its the best solution for me


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    #447
    stupidusername
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    Well I have one friend, who is my ex. Seem to have problems making friends, though can't quite figure out why.

    Don't get on great with my family. None of them know I'm on anti depressants or that I'm seeing a counsellor. They wouldn't know what to say if I told them. It's sad because I would really like to have people I could depend on to talk to.

    I'm making an effort to try to meet new people, but between my lows it's hard to keep doing it. I can't even commit to doing something far in advance because I don't know if when the time comes I'll be up to it.

    Of course, these lows are caused by the fact that I don't have friends and people to talk to, and also by people not treating me too well. I just can't seem to get on with people. So when I fall out with someone for some reason I get down again.


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    #448
    mickman
    Closed Accounts Posts: 4,661 ✭✭✭mickman


    stupidusername wrote: »
    Well I have one friend, who is my ex. Seem to have problems making friends, though can't quite figure out why.

    Don't get on great with my family. None of them know I'm on anti depressants or that I'm seeing a counsellor. They wouldn't know what to say if I told them. It's sad because I would really like to have people I could depend on to talk to.

    I'm making an effort to try to meet new people, but between my lows it's hard to keep doing it. I can't even commit to doing something far in advance because I don't know if when the time comes I'll be up to it.

    Of course, these lows are caused by the fact that I don't have friends and people to talk to, and also by people not treating me too well. I just can't seem to get on with people. So when I fall out with someone for some reason I get down again.

    why do you not get on with your family and keep falling out people? you seem to be at fault for the falling out, which is making you depressed. analyse why you fell out with someone and change yoru ways


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    #449
    Princess Peach
    Registered Users Posts: 11,698 ✭✭✭✭Princess Peach


    stupidusername wrote: »
    I'm making an effort to try to meet new people, but between my lows it's hard to keep doing it. I can't even commit to doing something far in advance because I don't know if when the time comes I'll be up to it.

    I hate that! When you have plans and have to pull out and I can never give the real reason! I just tell them that I'm sick!


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    #450
    stupidusername
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    mickman wrote: »
    why do you not get on with your family and keep falling out people? you seem to be at fault for the falling out, which is making you depressed. analyse why you fell out with someone and change yoru ways

    Well I've been trying to figure out all this stuff, but the only conclusion my counsellor has come to is that I haven't met the right people. She's actually gone through a number of my relationships with people and has said it seems to be them.

    My family don't care about anything.we're not the type of family that talks about things.And with friends I don't know. I don't know what it is about me.I've very strong opinions about things, that's the only thing I can think of. I am trying to work through it. My counsellor says I need to get into social situations so that we can work through it but it's taking time to get round to that. plus I have spoken to her about some things that have happened with people, and her conclusion (with the last person I fell out with) was he was in the wrong. Basically he was married, and he wanted to have an affair, and because he knew I had no friends he basically attacked me, trying to make me dependent on him to make me feel better, so I'd be interested in him. whatever about his motivations, he did just keep trying it on with me, and he did verbally attack me about how I was living my life. He wasn't a good person.

    There have been a few people that I've fallen out with and I can go through exactly what happened with them, but most people just don't have any interest in talking to me. Maybe I'm not interesting, maybe I come off like I'm not interested, maybe I'm not fun... I don't know what it is.


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    #451
    tikkaman
    Closed Accounts Posts: 32 ✭tikkaman


    stupidusername wrote: »
    Well I've been trying to figure out all this stuff, but the only conclusion my counsellor has come to is that I haven't met the right people. She's actually gone through a number of my relationships with people and has said it seems to be them.

    My family don't care about anything.we're not the type of family that talks about things.And with friends I don't know. I don't know what it is about me.I've very strong opinions about things, that's the only thing I can think of. I am trying to work through it. My counsellor says I need to get into social situations so that we can work through it but it's taking time to get round to that. plus I have spoken to her about some things that have happened with people, and her conclusion (with the last person I fell out with) was he was in the wrong. Basically he was married, and he wanted to have an affair, and because he knew I had no friends he basically attacked me, trying to make me dependent on him to make me feel better, so I'd be interested in him. whatever about his motivations, he did just keep trying it on with me, and he did verbally attack me about how I was living my life. He wasn't a good person.

    There have been a few people that I've fallen out with and I can go through exactly what happened with them, but most people just don't have any interest in talking to me. Maybe I'm not interesting, maybe I come off like I'm not interested, maybe I'm not fun... I don't know what it is.


    i understand everything your saying believe me, i feel as if i'm boring to people, and my CBT therapist is making me watch people conversing, but its not sinking in yet...

    i'm 34 and never had the confidence to start a full blown relationship, and now i simply cannot meet anyone of the opposite sex at all...

    i've joined a dating site to try and "BE NORMAL" and i've talked to a lovely girl online, i've thought about meeting up with her only to go into full blown panic attack this morning, needless to say i was at work half an hour and decided to take a day off....

    i just dont have the confidence to chat to women... or strangers... which makes life very very tough.... i don't want to die an old man alone whos wasted his life.... :(

    i've spent the morning crying my eyes out to my mum and brother, and never really could chat to the family about it until recently...

    i simply don't know if i have the strength or courage to carry on... :(

    i don't have many friends either, but you cannot expect many if you don't go out a socialise.... RIGHT..


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