List of things to do - Weddings

From an email I sent someone:

At least 1 year in advance:

1) Choose a church and date, call the parish house to confirm. If it's a popular church, you'll want to have it booked at least a year in advance.

2) Ask the priest to perform the wedding. If you are choosing a priest from a different parish to the church, expect to pay extra, and pay for a B&B for the night.

3) Arrange a venue for the afters. Shop around, and don't mention the fact that it's for a wedding, or they'll automatically charge more. Ask for what you want, for example a 3 course meal for 150 people, with a drinks reception. Once they quote you a price you can tell them that it's your wedding.

4) Book your pre-marriage course. Accord have a 6 month waiting list for some areas. http://accord.ie will tell you all local courses and some general info. It costs €180 per couple. o_o You'll want to book one for at least 6ish months before the wedding.

5) Book your band for the reception! You wouldn't believe how far ahead most are booked.

8 months in advance:

1) Think about invitations. Get a list of all the adresses. You may need to book accomodation for people travelling to the wedding.

2) Post your banns! This site: http://www.oasis.gov.ie/relationships/marriage/registration_of_marriage.html has a pdf form you can download, and a link to a list of registrars. Your priest will tell you where you need to register it. It's basically just a simple form that you both fill out and sign, stating where and when the wedding will take place and your names/ages.

3) If you're getting your dress made as opposed to buying off the rack, your dressmaker will need at least 6 months generally.

6 months in advance:

1) You need to get your church papers done. This can only be done within 6 months of the wedding date to try and counteract bigamy. (I don't really get it either, especially if you've been engaged to one person for years) This involves calling the church where you were baptised, and getting your baptismal and confirmation certs from them. Even if you had your confirmation in a different church, they always send all your Catholic files back to your baptismal church. You need to get your respective parish priests, or family priests, to fill out all the permission to marry forms. Typically, one of these is the priest that will marry you, so he'll be letting you know what to do anyway.

2) When you have your pre-marriage cert, church papers, and banns sent, the priest performing the ceremony will want to see you again to fill out a 'suitablity to marry' form (basically a formality, it'll only ever be used again if you want an annulment) and to discuss which readings/psalms you want etc. Typically, if this is the priest doing one of your 'freedom to marry' papers you can get it all done at the one time.

3) Send invites. Ask for cash instead of a gift list, most people prefer to give/recieve moneh.



General:

Flowers. Bouquets, church flowers, centrepieces for the reception.

People to say readings/ be ushers/ prayers of the faithful. Bridesmaid/best man.

Church music. Organist/ flautist/ singer.

Cake.

A bit of a long list for you but it should cover everything.

Six to Twelve Months Before

Select engagement ring with fiancé, if not already done so.

Select a wedding date and time.

Make a preliminary budget.

Reserve your ceremony and reception location.

Determine who will officiate at the ceremony.

Hire a wedding consultant, if you plan to use one.

Start compiling names and addresses of guests.

Select bridal and groom attendants.

Plan reception.

Check catering facilities, if at a club or hotel.

Select a caterer, if one is necessary

Select a professional photographer and video photographer.

Select a professional florist.

Select your dress and headpiece.

Announce your engagement in the newspaper

Select bridesmaids’ dresses.

Four Months Before

Make final arrangements for ceremony (deposits should be paid, contracts signed)

Make sure all bridal attire is ordered.

Have both mothers coordinate and select their dresses.

Register at a bridal registry in the towns of both families.

Order invitations and personal stationary.

Complete the guest lists and compile them in order.

Select the men’s wedding attire and reserve the right sizes.

Check requirements for blood test and marriage license in your area.

Make appointment for physical exam.

Shop for wedding rings.

Start planning the honeymoon.

Two Months Before

Address invitations and announcements. They should be mailed 4 to 6 weeks before wedding.

Finalize all details with caterer, photographer, florist, reception hall manager, musicians, etc…...

Order wedding cake, if not supplied by caterer.

Finalize the ceremony details with officiate.

Make rehearsal arrangements.

Plan rehearsal dinner.

Make appointments with hairdresser.

Make accommodation list for out-of-town attendants or guests.

Finalize the honeymoon plans.

One Month Before

Have final fitting for your bridal attendants’ gowns.

Make transportation arrangements for wedding day.

Purchase gifts for attendants.

Purchase gift for fiancé, if gifts are being exchanged.

Have the bridesmaids’ luncheon/Hen Party

Purchase going away outfit.

Keep a careful record of all gifts received in the notes section (write thank you notes immediately instead of letting them pile up).

Make sure you have all accessories, toasting goblets, ring pillow, garter, candles, etc.

Select responsible person to handle guest book and determine its location.

Two Weeks Before

Attend to business and legal details. Get necessary forms to change names on tax, drivers license, insurance and medical plans, bank accounts; make a will.

Prepare wedding announcements to be sent to newspaper.

Reconfirm the accommodations for out-of-town guests.

Arrange to have possessions and gifts moved to your new home.

Give a change-of-address card to the post office.

Finish addressing announcements to be mailed on the wedding day.

One Week Before

Contact guests who have not responded.

Give a final count to the caterer and review details.

Go over final details with all professional services you have engaged. Inform them of any changes.

Give photographer the list of pictures you want taken.

Give the video photographer a list of shots you would like included in the video.

Give all musicians the lists of music for the ceremony and reception.

Plan the seating arrangements.

Arrange for someone to assist with last minute errands and to help you dress.

Practice having your hair done to make sure it comes out properly, and determine the time it will take to have done.

Practice using your make-up in the same type of lighting you will have on the wedding day.

Keep up with the writing of your thank-you notes.

Pack your suitcase for the honeymoon.

Make sure you have your marriage license.

Have speech ready.

Make sure you have the wedding rings, and that they fit properly.

Make sure all wedding attire is picked up and fits.

Have a rehearsal with all participants, reviewing their duties.

Attend rehearsal dinner party. Stay calm and have fun!!!

Stay with family the night before the wedding. Go to bed early. You will want to look your best and feel great the next day…

On Your Wedding Day

Be sure to eat something. You have a big, exciting day ahead, and many brides have been known to faint.

Take a relaxing bath.

Fix hair or have an appointment to have it done at least 3 to 4 hours before the ceremony.

Make sure nails are done. Allow plenty of time to apply make-up.

Have all accessories together.

Start dressing one to one and half hours before the ceremony. If pictures are being taken before the ceremony, then have yourself and attendants ready approx. two hours before the ceremony (photographer and bridal attendants should arrive forty-five minutes to an hour before the ceremony for pictures)

Relax and enjoy your day.

After The Wedding

Send announcement and wedding picture to newspaper.

Mail announcements.

Write and mail thank-you notes.

Enjoy the rest of your life together.

There's a really good book written by a former B2B called "The Irish Bride's Survival Guide" - contains absolutely everything you need to plan a wedding & keep sane (I should know... the author is a friend of mine & I was one of the contributors!!)

babaduck wrote:

There's a really good book written by a former B2B called "The Irish Bride's Survival Guide" - contains absolutely everything you need to plan a wedding & keep sane (I should know... the author is a friend of mine & I was one of the contributors!!)

Congratulations babaduck, I reckon you were part of the production of one hell of a useful an informative book.

Girls (and guys) get this book, it is great!!
There is even a very funny chapter at then end which explains why guys may not seem to be as "into" the whole wedding thing as girls.

They just don't really care whether your shoes look "too strappy" or not
Thought the book was full of humour and a pleasure to read.
I'm reading it again ... (and again ..).

BTW - I am not related to the author in any way .. at all .. just pushing a book that is worth its weight in gold!

Register at a bridal registry in the towns of both families.

Check requirements for blood test and marriage license in your area.

Make appointment for physical exam.

Oh lord, I'm so clueless! What's a bridal registry and why do we need blood tests and physical exams before the wedding?

Thanks Cathy, that's calmed me a little. Think I might leave all the arrangements to my fiancee and I'll just get lots and lots of massages...

I thought you'd gotten the church and priest, poor you, I hope the organisation (and your treatment) goes well.

CathyMoran wrote:

I think that the blood tests are for the US

every US state has different rules. We got married in Washington State last July and we did have to sign a form declaring any long-term medical conditions such as untreatable STD's. Nobody wanted a blood test though.


Some notes on Wedding Photographers:

- book yours as early as possible as especially during the summer months, the best people get booked up rather quickly

- meet with your photographer before booking them. if you both don't get on with them, they probably aren't the person you want at your wedding

- book the date & location before booking a photographer.

- browse through various photographers websites to see the kind of styles of photography there are and print out samples of things you like and things you don't like to show your photographer

I am getting married in New York, but we havent set a date yet.

I am really new to all of this and only found out about doing marriage courses this morning, I was blissfully unaware of all the "procedures".

I read this sticky but just wondering if it is up to date?

What are the procedures for marrying in the US, do we still have to get "permission" etc???

:pac:

chriskin08 wrote: »

It seems to be too good to be true! It's helping us out a great deal. Just thought I'd share this website with everyone, it seems to have just come out of nowhere!

Probably popped up from the same place you came from chriskin :pac:

Sounds like it has some great features though, but if it is a wedding checklist, why not call the site weddingchecklist.ie??

IDo2Do sounds like something out of Star Wars ......

DeVore wrote: »

This was written by someone from the company behind MapMe. I wont use any service that feels the need to act in that manner.

DeV.

This is me prying, I know, but you getting married Devore?