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Talking To Ex?

  • 22-07-2014 10:39pm
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi,

    I was with my girlfriend the other day when I saw on her Facebook a message from her ex an it looked like they were talking back and forth. When I saw it my girlfriend made a passing comment along the lines of "ah we're just having a laugh on Facebook".

    But is that normal for a couple who haven't been together in over a year? I think they may have met up recently by chance in a pub and have been messaging since.

    I don't doubt her for a second just feel a little weird about her having regular chats with her ex who they have no mutual friends with etc.

    Am I paranoid or what?


Comments

  • #2
    Tokyo
    Politics Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,655 Mod ✭✭✭✭Tokyo


    Unless you have specific reason to be concerned, then I wouldn't worry about it. Plenty of people manage to make clean breaks from relationships and maintain a friendship with their exes - your girlfriend just sounds like one of those people. If you have concerns beyond that, then talk to her and tell her that you are bothered a little by it - maybe she can put your mind at rest.


  • #3
    Bafucin
    Closed Accounts Posts: 642 ✭✭✭Bafucin


    ConcernedGuy wrote: »
    Hi,

    I was with my girlfriend the other day when I saw on her Facebook a message from her ex an it looked like they were talking back and forth. When I saw it my girlfriend made a passing comment along the lines of "ah we're just having a laugh on Facebook".

    But is that normal for a couple who haven't been together in over a year? I think they may have met up recently by chance in a pub and have been messaging since.

    I don't doubt her for a second just feel a little weird about her having regular chats with her ex who they have no mutual friends with etc.

    Am I paranoid or what?

    It depends on the type of guy he is and the type of girl she is.

    She is not keeping it overly secretive or anything so that's a plus.

    Talk to her about it and have her explain. It is all about context.

    It is possible they are friends now.


  • #4
    Corkgirl210
    Closed Accounts Posts: 329 ✭✭Corkgirl210


    relationships are based on trust.. the fact that she wasnt open with you in the first place is a bit sneaky... if that was me with a current bf & talking to an ex.. id openly talk about it... not to justify but to ensure openness and trust...


  • #5
    blatantrereg
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,743 ✭✭✭blatantrereg


    As mentioned, it's all about context.
    Doesn't sound like she was making great attempts to conceal it to me. There's no need for her to ask permission.
    Plenty of people have experiences of people having problems with this sort of thing where there shouldn't be. That might contribute to her not advertising it, if you felt she might have spoken more about it.
    Do you have any reason to think they aren't over each other? Are you aware of either of them being inappropriate? If not you would be best taking it at face value.


  • #6
    tantan10
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12 ✭tantan10


    If this was me I'd.probably be only worried that she didn't memetioned.it in passing that she had been speaking to him. Of you have no doubt in her then I wouldn't worry to much as you said it's been nearly a year. You don't waNt to make a big thing out of nothing here either. If you feel really uncomfortable about it then tell her do I'm.sure shed understand if you were serious


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  • #7
    tantan10
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12 ✭tantan10


    If this was me I'd.probably be only worried that she didn't memetioned.it in passing that she had been speaking to him. Of you have no doubt in her then I wouldn't worry to much as you said it's been nearly a year. You don't waNt to make a big thing out of nothing here either. If you feel really uncomfortable about it then tell her do I'm.sure shed understand if you were serious


  • #8
    tantan10
    Closed Accounts Posts: 12 ✭tantan10


    If this was me I'd.probably be only worried that she didn't memetioned.it in passing that she had been speaking to him. Of you have no doubt in her then I wouldn't worry to much as you said it's been nearly a year. You don't waNt to make a big thing out of nothing here either. If you feel really uncomfortable about it then tell her do I'm.sure shed understand if you were serious


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