Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

girlonfire · 18-02-2012 11:33pm

I love Cake wrote: »

Hi all,
I'm currently in the midst of my final year in college but am plagued by incessant depression. I was unable to leave bed last week and have come pretty close to ending it. As you can imagine this is having a detrimental effect on my college work. Do any of ye have experience of telling your tutors or course heads of your daily turmoil. Is it worth telling them? Were they understanding? Would there be a chance of getting deadlines put back?
Cheers and keep fighting:)

I'd recommend talking to your tutors/lecturers. They're very accommodating and they're there to help and want to see people doing well at the end of the day. It'll definitely give you some breathing space and allow you to take some time for yourself. Good luck.

Things have been very chaotic of late. Have been experiencing hypo-manic symptoms for the last couple of weeks. Hoping to change up medication soon to help get things under control.
Hope everyone's doing okay

jammstarr · 18-02-2012 11:42pm

Lorna123 wrote: »

I most certainly am and from time to time I can't function but I find that the best thing for me is to force myself to get up and get out even though it requires an effort. When I give in to doing nothing I am worse off. This may not work for everyone though. I do appreciate that everyone is different. I am not advocating that this will work for everyone either, I am just saying what my experience has been. Not asking anyone to agree with me either, just giving my two cents worth.

I agree that making the effort can usually be the best thing to do however for myself depending on the severity of the fear it just cannot be done at times.

I love Cake wrote: »

Hi all,
I'm currently in the midst of my final year in college but am plagued by incessant depression. I was unable to leave bed last week and have come pretty close to ending it. As you can imagine this is having a detrimental effect on my college work. Do any of ye have experience of telling your tutors or course heads of your daily turmoil. Is it worth telling them? Were they understanding? Would there be a chance of getting deadlines put back?
Cheers and keep fighting:)

Definitely tell them. You certainly won't be the first person to approach them in this manner and colleges tend to be very aware of mental health issues nowadays.

girlonfire · 18-02-2012 11:43pm

Princess Peach wrote: »

I worked through my depression final year and miraculously got a 1.1. You can do really great to it you try and fight it. You seem to have the right attitude anyway, knowing what you should do to cope with the workload.

Wow. This inspires me so much! That's amazing. Well done:)

nesf · 19-02-2012 12:17am

Lorna123 wrote: »

I most certainly am and from time to time I can't function but I find that the best thing for me is to force myself to get up and get out even though it requires an effort. When I give in to doing nothing I am worse off. This may not work for everyone though. I do appreciate that everyone is different. I am not advocating that this will work for everyone either, I am just saying what my experience has been. Not asking anyone to agree with me either, just giving my two cents worth.

It's really important not to generalise from your own experience onto others' in these things. Otherwise you'll start pissing off people in a worse position to you or worse, making them feel worse about themselves for not being able to cope well.

nesf · 19-02-2012 12:20am

I'm reading this at the moment and am finding it good: http://www.amazon.co.uk/Peace-Every-Step-Mindfulness-Everyday/dp/0712674063/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1329607157&sr=8-1

More mindfulness preaching by me etc but I'm really finding this stuff is helping me cope day to day.

scrimshanker · 19-02-2012 1:28am

Plagued these days with wanting to die. Very down and worried over my future and not seeing much way out. My lovely housemate has been very nice to me and really is helping keep my head above water.

Another bad week over. Completely failed to do what my counsellor asked me to do as well so I get to fail again next week... Been considering a trip to the doc... Not sure if I should tho given I am seeing a counsellor. Wouldn't like to tread on toes.

KyussBishop · 19-02-2012 1:29am

I'm far too good at finding ways to fill my time (yet quite bad at making time for things), while avoiding anything remotely social (unbearably uncomfortable around people sometimes, other times completely fine; mixed social phobia/depression, which I'm seeing a psych about); have been coasting along now (again) for about 5 months, though in fairness a family member passed in that time, which inevitably pushed things on a bit longer.

Was doing quite well for a similar amount of time before that though, with social stuff; need to get back doing something again

A bad part of it is that I've been doing fine in all this time, completely within my comfort zone not really pushing myself; it's a worrying pattern as it's been this way about 10-12 years, and it's far too easy for time to just piss by unnoticed.
Not quite sure what I'm looking for socially either (i.e. what I want exactly socially), which makes things a bit more confusing as well.

Lorna123 · 19-02-2012 9:19am

nesf wrote: »

It's really important not to generalise from your own experience onto others' in these things. Otherwise you'll start pissing off people in a worse position to you or worse, making them feel worse about themselves for not being able to cope well.

My sole intention in inputting here was to try and offer help to someone, not to piss anyone off. I can only talk from my experience, and there are times when I cannot function and pushing myself doesn't work either but I was just saying what I try and do in those circumstances. I try to be positive in my messages. I am not responsible for anyone taking offence to anything I say, but at the same time I would not like to cause offence. People can read into messages what they want to, I have no control over that, but I don't think that many people set out to hurt anyone else. Does anyone worry about pissing me off??? I don't think so !

nesf · 19-02-2012 12:35pm

Lorna123 wrote: »

My sole intention in inputting here was to try and offer help to someone, not to piss anyone off. I can only talk from my experience, and there are times when I cannot function and pushing myself doesn't work either but I was just saying what I try and do in those circumstances. I try to be positive in my messages. I am not responsible for anyone taking offence to anything I say, but at the same time I would not like to cause offence. People can read into messages what they want to, I have no control over that, but I don't think that many people set out to hurt anyone else. Does anyone worry about pissing me off??? I don't think so !

You're doing the equivalent of going into a room full of people with pneumonia and telling them when you've got a touch of a chest cold that you just buck up and carry on and if they did the same then they wouldn't be getting pneumonia. Sure it's being positive but it completely misses the point and is likely to irritate others. When you're capable of making yourself feeling better by pushing yourself and going and doing stuff you're pretty much by definition not in a depression in the way most of the people posting on this thread get depressions. This isn't from time to time not being able to push yourself this is for weeks and months not being able to push yourself the vast majority of the time and not feel any better at best.

Edit: There are two ways to be depressed in the medical sense of the word. You can either have an all pervasive low mood which isn't capable of being lifted by going out and pushing yourself or anything similar. Or you can not be able to feel pleasure when doing pleasurable things, such as sex for the same time period even when your mood is good. So in both senses, pushing yourself to go out and do stuff doesn't help you. Just feeling low for a while until you get up and do something isn't depression it's a perfectly normal low mood as experienced by nearly everyone. Which can be deeply unpleasant, don't get me wrong, but it's not the same as being depressed for weeks on end.

Temaz · 19-02-2012 1:43pm

In a deep depression atm.

Lorna123 · 19-02-2012 2:45pm

nesf wrote: »

You're doing the equivalent of going into a room full of people with pneumonia and telling them when you've got a touch of a chest cold that you just buck up and carry on and if they did the same then they wouldn't be getting pneumonia. Sure it's being positive but it completely misses the point and is likely to irritate others. When you're capable of making yourself feeling better by pushing yourself and going and doing stuff you're pretty much by definition not in a depression in the way most of the people posting on this thread get depressions. This isn't from time to time not being able to push yourself this is for weeks and months not being able to push yourself the vast majority of the time and not feel any better at best.

Edit: There are two ways to be depressed in the medical sense of the word. You can either have an all pervasive low mood which isn't capable of being lifted by going out and pushing yourself or anything similar. Or you can not be able to feel pleasure when doing pleasurable things, such as sex for the same time period even when your mood is good. So in both senses, pushing yourself to go out and do stuff doesn't help you. Just feeling low for a while until you get up and do something isn't depression it's a perfectly normal low mood as experienced by nearly everyone. Which can be deeply unpleasant, don't get me wrong, but it's not the same as being depressed for weeks on end.

Thanks for that Nesf. Time for me to get out of here, while I had the best of intentions I seem to be doing more harm than good.

Gillo · 19-02-2012 4:00pm

Lorna123 wrote: »

Thanks for that Nesf. Time for me to get out of here, while I had the best of intentions I seem to be doing more harm than good.

I think the tone of your post was misunderstood, and it seems to me despite apologising that some people decided to go for glory. My reaction when I say the posts this morning was, for people just to relax and not get so worked up about your original. For what it's worth I'd say stay around, I've found the thread a great resource.

Aoifums · 19-02-2012 4:54pm

Feeling utterly shite since Wednesday. I found out I failed an exam on Thursday so that's made me feel even worse. Just trying to get through the mountain of work that I've let pile up now.

Kaching · 19-02-2012 6:12pm

Aoifums wrote: »

Feeling utterly shite since Wednesday. I found out I failed an exam on Thursday so that's made me feel even worse. Just trying to get through the mountain of work that I've let pile up now.

Its hard though , when you dont have the motivation to do the work tis even worse .. I've a pile too and absolutely no gumption to do it

Lorna123 · 19-02-2012 7:03pm

Gillo wrote: »

I think the tone of your post was misunderstood, and it seems to me despite apologising that some people decided to go for glory. My reaction when I say the posts this morning was, for people just to relax and not get so worked up about your original. For what it's worth I'd say stay around, I've found the thread a great resource.

Thanks Gillo, see I find the Mods on these boards very cutting. People are doing their best. I don't understand why the Mods have to be so cutting in their remarks. I went away feeling like a villain and all I was trying to do was help. The big thing about someone reading a message is that they are not face to face with the person who is posting it so they don't know in what context it is meant and they are free to take whatever meaning they want from it. I really do not think that anyone wants to piss off anyone here on any of these forums and oftentimes they are just misunderstood. To be honest with you I would be afraid to open my mouth in future, so best not to, I guess.

nesf · 19-02-2012 7:05pm

Lorna123 wrote: »

Thanks Gillo, see I find the Mods on these boards very cutting. People are doing their best. I don't understand why the Mods have to be so cutting in their remarks. I went away feeling like a villain and all I was trying to do was help. The big thing about someone reading a message is that they are not face to face with the person who is posting it so they don't know in what context it is meant and they are free to take whatever meaning they want from it. I really do not think that anyone wants to piss off anyone here on any of these forums and oftentimes they are just misunderstood. To be honest with you I would be afraid to open my mouth in future, so best not to, I guess.

I'm not a mod in this forum. It's just your comments have been ones I've heard many times by people trivialising depression.

jammstarr · 19-02-2012 8:10pm

I've started a new course last week. We've only done an introduction to the course so far and I'm already anxious as fuck about it

sam34 · 19-02-2012 8:59pm

Lorna, gillo, nesf, can ye take any further discussion to PM please and let's get this thread back on topic.

Kaching · 19-02-2012 9:38pm

jammstarr wrote: »

I've started a new course last week. We've only done an introduction to the course so far and I'm already anxious as fuck about it

You can't possibly f*ck it about more than I have with mine tbh

Lorna123 · 19-02-2012 10:05pm

jammstarr wrote: »

I've started a new course last week. We've only done an introduction to the course so far and I'm already anxious as fuck about it

Gosh jammstarr, I think that starting a new course is a terrific achievement, well done and don't worry you will be fine. You will have plenty of help and there is no need to worry. Best of Luck.

Aoifums · 19-02-2012 11:50pm

jammstarr wrote: »

I've started a new course last week. We've only done an introduction to the course so far and I'm already anxious as fuck about it

Well done for doing it

Just try keep on top of the work. I sound like such a hypocrite saying that but I'm speaking from my experience in college so far. I find it so easy to fall behind (like now) and really, really hard to catch up. I can't say the anxiety about it will go away because college and lectures and stuff still freaks the hell out of me but it gets more bearable.

cloud493 · 19-02-2012 11:53pm

Bought more razors today, but I haven't used them yet

bloody tempting, silly to buy them .

nesf · 20-02-2012 12:06am

cloud493 wrote: »

Bought more razors today, but I haven't used them yet bloody tempting, silly to buy them .

Go outside and bin them somewhere you won't be able to get them out of right now while you are still able to.

My plan these days to get my wife to hide all the sharp knives. Works well enough.

nesf · 20-02-2012 12:21am

Low and anxious all this evening. Exhausted tired too. I'm hoping it's nothing, I've had had a good week symptom free other than paranoia which was nice.

cloud493 · 20-02-2012 12:56am

Won't do anything tonight, have an exam tomorrow

two exams to be exact, freaking out. tried studying, but i cant remember a word off the page. but ive hid the razors, so it should be ok

Kaching · 20-02-2012 12:59am

cloud493 wrote: »

Won't do anything tonight, have an exam tomorrow two exams to be exact, freaking out. tried studying, but i cant remember a word off the page. but ive hid the razors, so it should be ok

Calm i'm sure you'll fly em

as for hiding the razors ? just curious hun hows that work if you know where they are?

cloud493 · 20-02-2012 1:11am

Well, I know not to use, cos I 'hid' them in an obstructive place

nesf · 20-02-2012 3:44am

cloud493 wrote: »

Won't do anything tonight, have an exam tomorrow two exams to be exact, freaking out. tried studying, but i cant remember a word off the page. but ive hid the razors, so it should be ok

Good luck with it!

jammstarr · 20-02-2012 5:59pm

cloud493 wrote: »

Well, I know not to use, cos I 'hid' them in an obstructive place

If you can throw them in the river or into a bin on the street. Just to make yourself another step removed from them.

Hope the exams went ok for ya. Mind yourself man

scrimshanker · 20-02-2012 6:37pm

Hi guys

just wondering who knows when does it become time to see a doctor and/or give up on counselling? What my counsellor says makes sense I guess but its not much use when I can't get out of bed in the morning and end up in even mroe of a panic cos I'm not doing any work and going to fail so then the next day is ruined as well. At this point I'm out at least one day every week and no sign of a better mood any time soon

When I am in I get about an hour's work done for every 4 I'm there. This is ridiculous and I'm getting so panicked because how am I supposed to do a postgrad degree when I can't work properly?

I'm just worried about what the right protocol is about seeing a doctor. I'm going to the college counsellor at the moment going ok i guess but as I said, hard to follow any of the advice when I can't get out of bed, but would it be wrong to also see the college doctor? I don't want to offend the counsellor, she's a lovely lady and I'd feel terrible if I offended her. She hasn't mentioned going to the doctor so I guess that means I can't be that bad? Have I gotten this all the wrong way round or am I just wasting everyone's time?

Sorry I don't know why I end up ranting every time I come in here. But yeah, how do you decide when it's time to see a doctor or do I wait until such as time as it may come up with the college counsellor?

Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

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