Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi all,
Vanilla are planning an update to the site on April 24th (next Wednesday). It is a major PHP8 update which is expected to boost performance across the site. The site will be down from 7pm and it is expected to take about an hour to complete. We appreciate your patience during the update.
Thanks all.

All ye oul wans and oul fellas out there! Wakey wakey, rise and shine!

1258259261263264334

Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 1,303 ✭✭✭Ramette


    looksee you need new glasses and Rube you naughty boy, of course I have experience running up hills nekkid, sure I do it every morning before breakfast to get the blood flowing, you should try it ;)


  • Registered Users Posts: 28,044 ✭✭✭✭looksee


    Ramette wrote: »
    looksee you need new glasses and Rube you naughty boy, of course I have experience running up hills nekkid, sure I do it every morning before breakfast to get the blood flowing, you should try it ;)

    Well, there's plenty of hills around here but they kinda go through the middle of the town, I think I might do even more damage to the local tourist industry :eek:

    Edit: hang on, it was Chucken's nekkid hill running that was in dispute! :-)


  • Registered Users Posts: 94 ✭✭roran


    OldGoat wrote: »
    Just about to head off for a week of faffing about on a surfboard. :D

    ...and quoting my all-time favourite comedians (Monty Python) "You lucky b*st*%d..." :D:D:D Enjoy your break!


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,551 ✭✭✭Rubecula


    Ramette wrote: »
    looksee you need new glasses and Rube you naughty boy, of course I have experience running up hills nekkid, sure I do it every morning before breakfast to get the blood flowing, you should try it ;)

    Do you mind if I slither and stumble and leave the running fer the young wans? Besides moving too fast while nekkid can cause locals to go blind. :cool:


  • Registered Users Posts: 26,899 ✭✭✭✭BBDBB


    its not the running too fast that's the problem

    its the sudden stopping that can cause you a mischief :eek:


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 8,551 ✭✭✭Rubecula


    I can stop safely in a hurry, but my body keeps moving for hours


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,108 ✭✭✭Jellybaby1


    You have all gone doo-lally. What will people think?


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,551 ✭✭✭Rubecula


    that we have all gone doo-lally?

    *Leaps up and down and blowing raspberries at passing young wans


  • Registered Users Posts: 28,044 ✭✭✭✭looksee


    Tis well for ye that ye can leap up and down. *Sits down puffing*.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,292 ✭✭✭BrensBenz


    Rubecula wrote: »
    Twas young Chucken who introduced me to this band of Scottish folk players and I dug this out ready to welcome her and Mr Chuck home from their sojourn in foreign climes.

    PS sorry to post a music video here in the peace and tranquility of O&O, but where else will she see it?

    PPS also sorry for the sound quality on this one. :(


    Sorry lads and lassies but....really? "Me ears is in bits after dah."

    Quote from an earlier opus on bagpipes from BrensBenz:

    Bagpipes? This thread is supposed to be about "trivial things" that annoy you. Bagpipes cannot be accused of being a trivial annoyance. Bagpipes provide intense annoyance to every living creature and plant on this planet except, of course for those sickoes blowing into them who have managed to supersize that gland in their heads which attenuates certain noises.

    Pythagorus went to the trouble of developing the musical "octave". A nice bit of work there, fair dues. Pity you had to ruin my childhood with your infernal triangles.

    Then the Egyptians invented and immediately rejected the bagpipes because it couldn't quite make that top note. In a remarkable bit of marketting, they managed to sell it to the Celts who quickly banished it to remote, West European islands. The Irish, reluctant to dump this heirloom, improved it by giving it its top note and extra drones. Unfortunately, their work was better suited to radio because, seeing the "elbow pipes" being played gave rise to severe mockery from a series of foreign invaders.

    Remarkably, the failed Egyptian prototype still survives, in Scotland, parts of Ireland and East US cities, where, at the drop of a hat, players, usually wearing orange skirts, still proudly demonstrate the bagpipes' ancient inability to play a full octave.

    Since the guvverment is inventing ever more stupid offences, isn't it time for bagpipe playing to be added to the list of nuisance crimes? No? What about a bagpipes tax? No? A register of known bagpipe players?

    Perhaps my grasp of historical data is slightly tenuous but not as inaccurate as bagpipe players describing their output as "music".


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 28,044 ✭✭✭✭looksee


    BrensBenz wrote: »
    Sorry lads and lassies but....really? "Me ears is in bits after dah."

    Quote from an earlier opus on bagpipes from BrensBenz:

    Bagpipes? This thread is supposed to be about "trivial things" that annoy you. Bagpipes cannot be accused of being a trivial annoyance. Bagpipes provide intense annoyance to every living creature and plant on this planet except, of course for those sickoes blowing into them who have managed to supersize that gland in their heads which attenuates certain noises.

    Pythagorus went to the trouble of developing the musical "octave". A nice bit of work there, fair dues. Pity you had to ruin my childhood with your infernal triangles.

    Then the Egyptians invented and immediately rejected the bagpipes because it couldn't quite make that top note. In a remarkable bit of marketting, they managed to sell it to the Celts who quickly banished it to remote, West European islands. The Irish, reluctant to dump this heirloom, improved it by giving it its top note and extra drones. Unfortunately, their work was better suited to radio because, seeing the "elbow pipes" being played gave rise to severe mockery from a series of foreign invaders.

    Remarkably, the failed Egyptian prototype still survives, in Scotland, parts of Ireland and East US cities, where, at the drop of a hat, players, usually wearing orange skirts, still proudly demonstrate the bagpipes' ancient inability to play a full octave.

    Since the guvverment is inventing ever more stupid offences, isn't it time for bagpipe playing to be added to the list of nuisance crimes? No? What about a bagpipes tax? No? A register of known bagpipe players?

    Perhaps my grasp of historical data is slightly tenuous but not as inaccurate as bagpipe players describing their output as "music".

    But not nearly as tenuous as your grasp of which forum you are in Benz! :D


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,108 ✭✭✭Jellybaby1


    Obviously all that noise has made Brens dizzy!


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,292 ✭✭✭BrensBenz


    [/QUOTE]

    looksee wrote: »
    But not nearly as tenuous as your grasp of which forum you are in Benz! :D
    Jellybaby1 wrote: »
    Obviously all that noise has made Brens dizzy!

    There's...bag...pipes...in...that...vid...e...o...Must...be...ex...ter...min...ated
    Ex..ter..min...ate...ffffzzzztttt...ex...ter...min...ate


  • Registered Users Posts: 94 ✭✭roran


    BrensBenz wrote: »




    There's...bag...pipes...in...that...vid...e...o...Must...be...ex...ter...min...ated
    Ex..ter..min...ate...ffffzzzztttt...ex...ter...min...ate[/QUOTE]


    Oh Oh! I've seen this before...low battery..."Mrs BrensBenz!...Mrs BRENSBENZ, can you plug in the charger please...." :P:P:P


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,292 ✭✭✭BrensBenz


    roran wrote: »
    Oh Oh! I've seen this before...low battery..."Mrs BrensBenz!...Mrs BRENSBENZ, can you plug in the charger please...." :P:P:P

    These bolts here...just below my ears...crocodile clips...red one to the....left??? or maybe???...whateverrrr! ZZZZZZTTT.

    Hmmm. Folks, BrensBenz is emmm broken, melted, sort of. Eeeeuuuuuwww!

    No, hold on...there's a tiny twitch in his face...What's that? You want your keyboard? You want to get something off your chest? You found some more total b@$t@rd$ today? Oh....OK....tell us about it why don'cha.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,292 ✭✭✭BrensBenz


    BrensBenz wrote: »
    These bolts here...just below my ears...crocodile clips...red one to the....left??? or maybe???...whateverrrr! ZZZZZZTTT.

    Hmmm. Folks, BrensBenz is emmm broken, melted, sort of. Eeeeuuuuuwww!

    No, hold on...there's a tiny twitch in his face...What's that? You want your keyboard? You want to get something off your chest? You found some more total b@$t@rd$ today? Oh....OK....tell us about it why don'cha.

    So, since my laptop is running XP and will explode into millions of pieces of lethal shrapnel at any moment, I asked the nice man in the cumpewher shop today about a new laptop. "Hmmm", I said during his recitation on a "Theme of Acer and Sony", trying to sound interested, while frantically dredging my brain for any technospeak ammo I could remember:

    "What about "MS Office?" Is it installed?"
    "No, you buy this Office 365 (€99.99) and install it yourself."
    "Hmmm", I thought. "Golden opportunity for error right there". But before I could impart this wisdom to the salesperson, he announced that:

    "It only works for a year??? You get this special card with this magic number and, if you haven't lost it, you renew it online and...if this...and if that...it runs for another year after you've paid another €99.99.

    So, I can't BUY Office 365, I can only rent it? For €100 year? And renewing the rental is a sequence of error-prone processes, specifically designed to fail and force me to buy ANOTHER Office 365 package? Right?

    Well, his poor little face didn't know where to look. "They never told me about this in the training sessions! Better call Anto, the supervisor."

    Same thing in the next cumpewher shop.

    How would yiz feel if a year's work on, say, Word, Excel and PowerPoint suddenly wasn't available because MS's ransom payment method didn't work? I would be less than impressed.

    I have Office 2010. I OWN it. It works. It's on MY laptop. My laptop is staying put. I may not be able to beat Bill Gates single-handed so feel free to lend a hand.


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,551 ✭✭✭Rubecula


    my main comp is XP and while it works I see no need to change it. The only reason for upgrades is to make money for Microsoft, Ther really couldn't give a tinker's codpiece for the plight of the working classes. Not like the olden days when we would get up half an hour before we went to bed, have half a handful of cold gravel for breakfast ..... if we were lucky *mumble mumble* Spam *mumble mumble* Bloody Vikings * mumble mumble* Nobody expects *mumble mumble*


  • Registered Users Posts: 28,044 ✭✭✭✭looksee


    I never knew tinkers wore codpieces? ;)


  • Registered Users Posts: 94 ✭✭roran


    looksee wrote: »
    I never knew tinkers wore codpieces? ;)

    Maybe they (s)wore codpieces?:confused:


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,551 ✭✭✭Rubecula


    On the plus side may I be the first to say WELCOME HOME to Chucken and her Mr Chuck.

    Good to have you back my little Soup Dragon (when you see this)


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 9,459 ✭✭✭Chucken


    Thanks Rubes :) Great to be back.










    *I'm lying :(
    :pac:


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,292 ✭✭✭0lddog


    looksee wrote: »
    I never knew tinkers wore codpieces? ;)

    Yes, but did you ask ?


    I'm an X XPer cause the ol thing discovered how to turn itself off when thing got to hot for it.

    Now have a Win 7 from 'refreshed by us' ( I fancy a bit of a refresh too ) came loaded with open office.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,108 ✭✭✭Jellybaby1


    An annual hundred smackers into Microsoft's back pocket! Do they think we is eejits, or whah?


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,303 ✭✭✭Ramette


    Batten down the hatches there is an unstable weather front approaching from the bay of biscay...... Apparently we will be flooded overnight if the forecast is correct.... And I don't think even Chucken's soup will save us!


  • Registered Users Posts: 9,459 ✭✭✭Chucken


    Thats it.

    I'm goin to the airport.

    :mad: Bloody weather.

    On a side, I met my match for soup in Corfu. I wasn't feeling too well one evening (not beer induced btw) and the lady of the house made me what I can only call magic soup.We couldn't figure out what was in it but by gum it worked a treat.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,108 ✭✭✭Jellybaby1


    And you didn't get the recipe! Shame Chuckie, you're losing your grip! If you had got the recipe I wonder what delights we would have been subjec......erm.....happy to indulge in!

    Welcome home all the tanned Chucks!


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,552 ✭✭✭Layinghen


    Welcome home Chucken.


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,210 ✭✭✭bonzodog2


    looksee wrote: »
    I never knew tinkers wore codpieces? ;)

    Sure they were all the rage back in the day. Couldn't leave home without one. :rolleyes::D


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,292 ✭✭✭BrensBenz


    Ramette wrote: »
    Batten down the hatches there is an unstable weather front approaching from the bay of biscay...... Apparently we will be flooded overnight if the forecast is correct.... And I don't think even Chucken's soup will save us!

    God was moving furniture this morning in NCD, then He pulled his bathplug and soaked us.

    But, you know, the universe is in perfect balance: Ups are always matched by downs and vice versa. Take today, for example:
    BrensBenz Manor was battered by tunder'n lightnin'.
    The woof wouldn't go out - sat with his legs crossed for a couple of hours.
    Next, it's chemo day again, so off we go to the hostible.
    Several hours later, the (really) nice doctor told me I failed the blood test and sent me home, chemoless.
    Then, I needed change for the carpark but the hostible cafeteria was packed and the queue stretched down the hall.

    So, what could possibly balance that lot out, I hear you ask. Well, Chucken is back, safe and sound of course but, still needing change, I stopped at the little bakery at the hostible foyer and what did I find on display? Go on, guess. Yizzle never get it......gurrcake!!! Yes, actual gurrcake. "Is that....gurrcake? I asked the nice lady. "Oh yes, just like your Grannie used to have. Would you like a piece?" "How many have you got?"

    Well, the scales tipped - "this is a good day after all, a memorable day. Gurrcake is still available," and, for a modest fee, I'll tell yiz where the hostible is.


  • Advertisement
  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,108 ✭✭✭Jellybaby1


    Gurcake never went away Brens, it can now be seen at some of those posh food markets, and the RDS food fair. They think Gurrrrrcake is an awful common name, so they do, and hence they now call it Chester Cake! CHESTER Cake? Damn their eyes! To horse men, weapons at the ready.....charrrrrrrrrge!!! Te de den, te de den, te de den, te de de, etceterah, etceterah, etceterah!


This discussion has been closed.
Advertisement