Review: Ethiopia

Just got back from Ethiopia - and loved every second = 11/10

Hope I ain't too wordy below ...

"White Meat"
When you stroll down your first dirt laden Addis street (yeah Addis to the cool kids) and someone gently offers "White Meat" as a welcome you know you are in for an interesting time.

Lesson number one:
"White bait" would be more appropriate, the first guy who approaches you in a friendly manner claiming to work for Goal most likely is not to be trusted. Well he did give us a tour of the city and got a meal and a couple of quid for his services but by all accounts we got off lightly.

Lalibela:
Okay onwards and upwards, our first few days took in screaming kids, partially paved roads, dust in the nostril bone rattling 4x4 rides, a manic camel/goat/donkey/AK-47 market in Bati, Kombolcha and Woldia as stopovers before arriving at Lalibela. Actually not to write off those two days or in fact any day, there was as much anecdotes in any given day as there is in a week of other holidays I have undertaken.

Lalibela is the Petra of Ethiopia, and also sports a mean table tennis team. Several impressive churches have been carved (hewn) out of the ground during and after the reign of King Lalibela The tour took us around the many sites thru a few tunnels and to the pinnacle post card shot Bet Giorgis (St. Georges). This tall monolith reaches up out of a deep cut in the rock and is stunning.

Gonder:
Gondo/e/ar comprises of several medieval castles - not unlike Bunratty without the ****e folk park. Built by Fasilides of Ethiopia and subsequently bust up good by the Italians and subsequently the British.

Simien Mountains:
Simien / Simen / Simian (I like the latter) is a National Park encompassing Ethiopias highest peak and some amazing trekking. Local wildlife we saw included Ibex, Lagemeyer, Vultures, Kestrels and my own kind: Gelada Baboons. We trekked for 4 days / 4 nights although I fell ill on the last and did not make the last peak - much to the ire of my compadres who quietly accused me of fakery - I showed them - literally. We also met about 100 children named Jamal, saw a lady with gangrene, showered not once, cleaned ourselves in a stream twice, ate like kings and toiletted like queens.

Bahar Dar:
This is the most modern town we visited, and has lots of new best friends for you to meet. It lies on the edge of Lake Tana. We visited some of the Lakes' many monasteries by boat and also the Blue Nile falls - a whimper of their former glory due to a hydro plant installation at their summit, but worth a look nonetheless.

With Love: Here comes the night:
At an average 5 birr (E0.50) for beer St. George, Meta, Castel, Dashen, Bedele, and more were imbibed as was our wont. Meta and Bedele stood out as the best of a not so good lot but hey its Ethiopia - what did you expect?

We also sampled the sweet sweet Tej - a honey wine (read hooch) in a straw floored mud rendered Tejbeit in Lalibela. Its very nice but churns the gut a little - almost like a palatable Buckfast - and with similar side effects.

We only hit the town once - in Bahar Dar. On this most amazing night of nights we managed to climb trees, pose with a rifle, inadvertently attend a brothel, left the brothel as innocent as when we arrived (I swear), went to an azmari singing house [ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Music_of_Ethiopia], hijacked the drums and the Masenqo (guitar type thing), dance like maniacs, get clapped on, get booed off, get accused of not paying, nearly get into a fight, almost have the cops involved, escaped in a taxi, laughed our arses off. How was it? Fupping brilliant.

With Love: 5 star treatment:
We were bug bitten, cold water shower, luck to have a roof over our heads - actually the accommodation was fine better than expected (if you set expectation to zero) in the majority of places. Just don't expect Jeeves to bring you a cuppa and for the love of jimmy I cannot understand why some complained about lack of facilities, - look at your room, then look out at the street - then be thankful for what you have.

With Love: Running Repairs:
Can you read a donkey, goat, calf - or for that matter a human - which one is going to cross in front of you at the last minute without looking? Which is going to stay as is. Can you repair a Land Cruiser when the steering goes, or the gear box seizes? Replace a tire on an uneven road while crazed bus drivers speed by? All of this and in addition putting up with 4 Irish idiots is required to drive in Ethiopia.

A big big shout to our drivers: Adam, Arameus, Woubeshat, and last but not least Gomfer (all spelt wrong I'm sure). Gomfer was so nice, a real gentleman he even gave us four a gift before we left. Can't praise him enough.

With Love: People:
The best, by a mile, of the tour was the people, the smiling, hand holding, pointing, laughing, cartwheeling people.

The three favourite words of the vast majority of Ethiopians are in fact one, repeated three times ad nauseum: 'You, you, YOU'. As a Faranji, kids grab your attention by shouting 'you you you' and leaping, waving, hopping, and so on. In fact jumping head over heals into sand was one favourite. You might think this would tire you out - not really - they are a curious, brave people. The best fun to be had is to shout 'you you you' back, Hi 5, pull a coin from their ear, shake hands, jump up and down with them, kick football (give them the football afterward if it is yours - you don't need it!), scare em, whatever, they are kids, and when you act like one for a while - its great.

Don't, however, feed em biscuits or any sugary sweets. As you may imagine they have a diet lacking in sugar. Sugar input makes em 10x more hyper - and that, believe me is a hell of a lot of hyper...

And Squalor:
Perhaps I have glossed over the poverty in Ethiopia. I don't want to lean too heavily on it - as the experience was so positive as a whole - even that sounds selfish. We all know and recognised the poverty from day one. To put it mildly it Ethiopia is piss poor. I think its great that they are so positive and warm despite that, but believe me that is no substitute.

Amputees, the blind, open wounds, beggars yes beggars in Ethiopia, people carrying immense loads, mud huts, open sewers (where sewers exist), sharing your hut with donkeys, cows, etc. This and more forms daily life in Ethiopia.

All I can say without a rant is to do your bit - the best thing by far is to visit ...

Practicals for 2 weeks:
Flights - Aer Lingus / BA via Heathrow - E800 return
Drivers / Tour - E1250
Spending money - Strict Budget (food / water / tips) $200, Plenty $500-$600

Can be done cheaper (excl flights) - a lot cheaper if you have the time to use public transport etc. etc. and the research - for convenience we used a company to arrange this - EthioGuzo Tours.

Photos:
http://picasaweb.google.com/sbradish/Ethiopia

More to come.

I cannot recommend it more highly!