All ye oul wans and oul fellas out there! Wakey wakey, rise and shine!

Went to a new archery club last week. Woman in charge was giving the general rules and layout speech. She came to the "We have Zero tolerance for alcohol while shooting in the club" part of the speech and she looked me straight in the eye as she said it.
Who has been telling tales out of school?

Jellybaby1 wrote: »

Brens, you sure do look for trouble!

Think you might be right. "We" went dress-shopping today in Drawda Town, an ordeal that no male should ever be subjected to. Every molecule was diplomatically strained trying not to look bored by having to touch thousands of pieces of cloth when, out of the blue like a big, slobbery St. Bernard pulling me out of a snowdrift, I heard "Tell you what: Why don't you go to the camera shop and I'll meet you later?"
Halleluyah, halleluyah.....
"Oh, well, OK.....if you're sure."

Well, it was elections time and I could faintly hear some intellectual, obscured by mugshot posters, speaking through a faulty Tannoy, meekly suggesting that all politicians, except his buddies, were eejits. As I approached the camera shop, my view still obscured by posters and, through the gaps, squad cars, the speaker reached the climax of his oration. With the audience of 17 people and 18 gardai in the palm of his hand, he introduced the special guest, from Norn Arn, the one, the only Jarry Oddoms.

You know that feeling you get when you think you're being watched / filmed / assessed / documented / bar-coded? I'm sure that an international array of invisible laser dots were jiggling all over my cool, hip and trendy gansey. Suddenly, the latest offering from Mr. Nikon was of less interest than viewing endless racks of almost identical dresses and trying to figure out what moron invented women's dress sizes. Size 12? 12 what? Feet? Inches? Centimetres? Cubits? 12 in that shop but 14 in this shop?

However, millions of brownie points were earned when I hurriedly re-appeared, breathless, in a dress shop, obviously having selflessly sacrificed playtime with a 400mm f2.8 piece of essential kit to help touch more acres of fabric.

Yiz probably know that I like big dogs. I also like Laurel and Hardy. Knowing this, one of my offspring sent me this vidjo which I hadn't seen for donkeys' years.

Stan is trying to get the brandykeg from a St. Bernard. Yes, it's dated but, with so many tales of alcohol-driven divilment in this thread, I thought it might strike a chord with O's & O's.

Be careful with your volume setting........!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T_wiqByZX6k

OldGoat wrote: »

Phew! That was a narrow escape for ya BB. We all know Canon is the beesknees.

/Worms, Can, Open

Think you mean the "pup's nuts."

Back in the black and white days, I had an AE1. Then Mr. Canon rendered it valueless by introducing the AE1 Program. When I received executive approval, I stuffed a wad of notes into my underpants and, because the photo mags said the new Olympus bore a remarkable resemblance to pup's bits, I went to trade in my AE1 for an Olympus OM2N (I think). The nice man put the Olympus on the counter. It was beautiful, looked like a Ferrari but.......I have eyesight difficulties and that viewfinder was small, dim and difficult to find exposure information.

"Well, for the same money, you could have an AE1 Program." On the counter, it looked like a family saloon but "when will Mr. Canon devalue this by introducing an AE1 Program2?"

"Hhmmm. What else have you got," I asked. "I have a slightly used Nikon FE2." "A whoh?"

It was placed on the counter, beside the Ferrari and the family Ford and looked like a 1960's London taxi. I really wasn't keen, not only because it was ugly but Nikon owners "seemed" to be either professionals or wealthy, deluded posers.

I have no ambition to be either but, just to be sociable, I lifted the Nikon to my eye and......WOW! The viewfinder was huge, bright, clear with all necessary information easily seen. He gave me all the spiel about the vast range of lenses and bits but I wasn't listening - that viewfinder was amazing! Then, the Nikon spec. beat the Canon hands down so the taxi came home with me and I still use it, thirty years later.

I have other Nikon cameras: all the lenses fit and the controls are in the same place so there's no need to "learn" a new camera. And, over the years, Mr. Nikon has accommodated my deteriorating eyesight with easily-fitted, "extreme" correction lenses while Mr. Canon needs a man in some far-off country, with tiny screwdrivers, to remove the blur from his viewfinders.

However, I hope I have resisted brand snobbery, allowing my rubbish photos to attest my lack of skill. To this end, I rarely venture outdoors these days without my duty-free, cheap and nasty Samsung digital. The image content may still be cr@p but it's always focused and correctly exposed cr@p. And, how cool, hip and trendy do I look when holding the camera, one handed, at arm's length or over my head? Like, todally ossum.

Got Newstalk on here and following local radio stations website for our local results.

Happy little Hen here as well.

Ya, someone should.

I cant get local radio working on my laptop so I've no idea whats going on.

Can you keep an eye on the Elections for me, it's half time in the European Match.

Yes they do change from an Oval Ball, to a round one for the second half, no the Elections are not available on Sky. Thanks.

Still glued to the radio!!!!!!

Sad really:(

But hey I enjoy it:D

martinn123 wrote: »

Gareth Bale just got elected President of Europe, just thought you would like to know.

Marcelo, just got VP.

And Ronaldo, gets the other V P position.

Can't wait to hear those inaugural speeches:

• "Well like, e's creay'ih this like issue and e's stud theh, doin' naffink 'bouh ih an' Oi'm like.....woh?."
• "At the end of the dye, this like victry juss shows the lads' charactah."
• "Goin' fawwud, Ih'll be like a tough job like bah Oi fink we can todally do ih."
• "Oi'm like quihhin' coz they don't like show me no respek."

Spread ,
our fallen comrade,
On the off chance you look us up, congrats on your "R's" getting back in the big time yesterday. Hope you are doing ok mate.

Chucken wrote: »

No fear of our Spread

I chat to him regularly elsewhere.

by chat you mean give grief .... :pac:

So, d'elections are over!

During the campaign, I had the dubious honour of being canvassed by one of the candidates. Not having much else to do, I decided to listen and possibly discuss ishooz with this candidate. I listened intently and was following this carefully-rehearsed monologue when, suddenly, my concentration was shattered, never to return.

"What caused this breakdown in concentration?" I hear you ask.

Well, the candidate had a broad, North County Dublin accent, not dissimilar to members of my own family and social circle. (As yiz know, I myself have no accent a tall a tall but, somehow, THEY all have diss NCD drawl.) Hearing this accent, I guessed that the candidate and I had similar backgrounds, life experiences and possibly even similar educations. Imagine my surprise, Joe, when, mid-sermon, the candidate uttered a certain word that I thought had been eradicated from Ireland; had been replaced by a shorter and perfectly acceptable word and had survived only in the acquired accents of theatrical lovies, British Tory MPs and British Pleese when microphones are being pointed at them.

"What is this word?" I hear you ask. Janey, youze are asking a lot of questions!

The word in question in "whilst", usually pronounced "wawlst" by the above-mentioned groups. I was shocked, Joe! Apsilootly shocked I was to hear this word in a NCD accent.

"What did you do?" I hear you ask. Well, I remained calm, thinking maybe the candidate was throwing "feelers" into the monologue to assess my attitudes to lovies, British Tories and pleesemen. "Nah, irrevelint", I thought, and dismissed that idea. "He is merely reciting blurb that his bosses made him learn off by heart, so the real question is "who wrote this word, the word with the affectational "st" in the tail?

It is my unpleasant duty to inform you that the candidate was elected. Presumably the writer of the "whilst" word will be regarded as a hero, will write more dross for his sheep to learn and include the "whilst" word whensoever he can so do. Therefore it may soon be heard in the halls of power and in the meeja, whilst his true identity remains unbeknownst to the electorate as the "whilst" word gains usage, like todally?

In a few years, we will have an opportunity to remove the mouthpiece but the real culprit, the composer, will remain at large. The party of the first part finds this to be a nuisance of considerable magnitude.....so he does.

Jellybaby1 wrote: »

Spread, the only one who ever escaped, whilst we linger on. Respect.

Oh, except for Cicero, who began this thread.

I left once.
I didn't like it.