The Pregnant Womans Moan Thread.

loubian · 17-02-2013 10:26pm

I'm 19 weeks today. I felt the little thing moving all day Tuesday.. (well I thought it was, it was the normal fluttering feeling I'd been getting for a while) but I haven't felt much since Tuesday.. Is that normal? Ironic thing is think I felt a few flutters there! I know I shouldn't worry coz its still so small, but can't help it!

wolfpawnat · 17-02-2013 10:46pm

freudiangirl wrote: »

Sometimes I wonder if I actually puked would it be over with

Anyhoo, finally settled tummy with salt n vinegar crisp sandwich....

My oh decided he wanted tuna sandwich, a smell i find hard to stomach when not pg.
I just told him it will make me sick, so he continued making it so I am in bed away from smell. I did warn him to get rid of tuna smell

Yeuck

I hate the tuna, I feel so bad still with it, same with cooking scrambled egg every morning, I just want to run as far a way as possible from it. Hmmm, crisps, I am insane for Monster Munch now, I want them so much all the time.

freudiangirl wrote: »

Great to hear I am not only one finding it tough

It is crap, I know how you feel, but I promise it gets a bit better after the main morning sickness is over. Everything seems so much more intense this time around. Having another to try and entertain too I think makes it so much harder. The baby drains so much from you then I think it is made harder by them draining you even more.

wolfpawnat · 17-02-2013 10:54pm

I had my sons birthday today, he had an amazing time, which had me happy of course. Then the hormones set in and I got emotional about how old he is and freaking that a new baby would make him fell abandoned and all other what seem ridiculous in hind sight, but got the better of me at the time making me feel stupid crying about it.

And I was stressed out of my mind about the cost of the party, I budgeted perfectly, but I got it in my head it would go wrong and was freaking I wouldn't have enough money. I am so tired from the stress I put myself under that tonight a dinner and a shower are seemingly like a 25km run.

Pat McGhee · 18-02-2013 3:10pm

freudiangirl wrote: »

Great to hear I am not only one finding it tough

Oh sweetie you're not on your own. *hugs*
My ms kicked in at about 4 weeks and has been relentless - hospitalized 6 times for fluids and meds, waking in the middle of the night to puke, nausea 24/7 and Im not even 12 weeks yet. Its totally put me off ever getting pregnant again!

The hospital have put me on zofran which has helped with the vomiting but unfortunately the nausea is never far away. Cant wait for it to end.

Synyster Shadow · 18-02-2013 6:46pm

freudiangirl wrote: »

Sometimes I wonder if I actually puked would it be over with

Anyhoo, finally settled tummy with salt n vinegar crisp sandwich....

My oh decided he wanted tuna sandwich, a smell i find hard to stomach when not pg.
I just told him it will make me sick, so he continued making it so I am in bed away from smell. I did warn him to get rid of tuna smell

Yeuck

Yea fish was my weakness too any kinda fish and I love fish

I found any kind of crisps were my comfort point in it all

My dads neighbour made dinner for him one day (he's her golden boy) and it was pasta and mince and veg and a sauce I was feeling half ok and thought I'd swipe a bit and took one fork full and started chewing dad just looked at me and said "you ok?" and out the door I ran and got sick I had a cinnemon stick in my mouth I was discusted. Couldnt understand why it was in there it was like an inch long wasnt small at all!

freudiangirl · 19-02-2013 1:56pm

Today started bad, felt hungover and cranky. My poor son and partner got given out to for no reason. I still managed to go to playgroup but no energy at all.
In pjs now for day , small man is asleep so all good.
Have my bloodtest tomorrow , i cannot remember ever feeling this bad on baby #1 .

wolfpawnat · 19-02-2013 2:49pm

freudiangirl wrote: »

Today started bad, felt hungover and cranky. My poor son and partner got given out to for no reason. I still managed to go to playgroup but no energy at all.
In pjs now for day , small man is asleep so all good.
Have my bloodtest tomorrow , i cannot remember ever feeling this bad on baby #1 .

That is the perfect way to describe how I felt too. Hungover, minus the nights drinking. I know how crap it feels, and you feel guilty for giving out to no1 too.

It really does feel more intense this time.

freudiangirl · 19-02-2013 3:03pm

wolfpawnat wrote: »

That is the perfect way to describe how I felt too. Hungover, minus the nights drinking. I know how crap it feels, and you feel guilty for giving out to no1 too. It really does feel more intense this time.

I hate the feeling of annoyance i feel towards baby #2 already.
I also hate that i am so moany when I should be delighted.

Yeah #1 is a good boy and doesnt deserve to be given out to. Will make sure to have decent play with him later.

wolfpawnat · 19-02-2013 3:10pm

freudiangirl wrote: »

I hate the feeling of annoyance i feel towards baby #2 already.
I also hate that i am so moany when I should be delighted.

Yeah #1 is a good boy and doesnt deserve to be given out to. Will make sure to have decent play with him later.

Totally normal, I was in bits for weeks and was a terrible mum to my little guy, putting on DVD after DVD and just sleeping on the couch next to him because I felt so crap. I have a bit more energy now, but still the hormones make me give out to him and he is just looking at me wondering what he's done wrong or apologising and worst of all "Sorry Mummy, I try to make you happy" that has caused me to cry a few times. Hormones are evil.

People say Congrats to me and I just give them a glare. I should be happy to be pregnant, but there are days I really can't even pretend to be.

How Strange · 19-02-2013 3:55pm

It passes fruediangirl and then you'll feel normal again. In lots of ways I'm finding this pregnancy easier even with a toddler. I just don't have the time to indulge every little niggle or pain. It's actually making the pregnancy fly around.

I never thought I'd be saying that when I was as sick as a dog from wks 4-14. I just wanted to crawl into bed and cry. I think the tiredness which I seem to exist in constant state of these days made the sickness worse. I was very irritable and cranky.

MurdyWurdy · 20-02-2013 1:14pm

Spent yesterday evening and this morning vomiting copiously. Seriously, who still has morning sickness at 22 weeks? This is getting ridiculous. I have weeks of not being too bad and then all of a sudden it's back with a vengeange - ffs!!! :mad:

Synyster Shadow · 20-02-2013 2:03pm

MurdyWurdy- I was so fearful of that I hit 17 weeks and felt great and everyone said it can come back in the 20+ weeks again I near cried! I have had a couple of vomiting episodes though where I'v eating something I'v eating till this point and not been sick and with no warning I've got all my dinner up I get so frustrated cause it puts me off foods.

Today I'v a head cold and could not wake up this morning (I do hubbys lunch and get breakfast ready) usually I just lie waiting for the alarm to go off. Would give anything to spend all day wrapped up in bed with hubby I'd happily let him play xbox all day. Just one of those days but the world dont stop for me. We agreed to get one quality day in soon though just us at home doing what we want and piggin out on fav foods maybe even dinner delivered to our door...CANT WAIT!!!

freudiangirl · 20-02-2013 4:23pm

How do ye deal with people fussing over you when pregnant. I mean the whole"you shouldnt be lifting that"I am six weeks preg with baby #2 with 16 month old... so I have to lift him and do housework etc..I will actually freak at my family if they keep it up.How do i politely tell them to back off?
I feel like getting a t shirt pregnant not disabled.

Still not feeling great tummy wise, had app with nurse to get bloods done and sort out hospital stuff.
I am to go back in 4 weeks for check up so happy out.
On the plus side, darling husband has taken little man for most of afternoon which meant I got to go window shopping on my own and have kfc''s for lunch
Sitting in tra ksuit watching countdown now..... nice no craziness in my house.

wolfpawnat · 20-02-2013 4:57pm

freudiangirl wrote: »

How do ye deal with people fussing over you when pregnant. I mean the whole"you shouldnt be lifting that"I am six weeks preg with baby #2 with 16 month old... so I have to lift him and do housework etc..I will actually freak at my family if they keep it up.How do i politely tell them to back off?
I feel like getting a t shirt pregnant not disabled.

I get that a lot too, had to go to the vet today so had to lift my 4 year old up, people going mental. I just said "I'm a real woman"

Stupidly infantile, but I had more important things to worry about!

Synyster, I am eighteen weeks tomorrow and I thought for two weeks it was getting better, but yesterday and the day before were horrible, just hoping it is my tight-ish clothes and not actual MS back. I could do without it.

Synyster Shadow · 20-02-2013 5:59pm

wolfpawnat wrote: »

I get that a lot too, had to go to the vet today so had to lift my 4 year old up, people going mental. I just said "I'm a real woman" Stupidly infantile, but I had more important things to worry about!

Synyster, I am eighteen weeks tomorrow and I thought for two weeks it was getting better, but yesterday and the day before were horrible, just hoping it is my tight-ish clothes and not actual MS back. I could do without it.

Well Im now 33 weeks and I got lucky. As I said there has been little moments but I can handle that. I hope its just your clothes I did feel off a few times after MS was on its way out but I figured the hormones are trying to settle down again and just made allowances for weeks 18 and 19 just to give that extra time. Hope your in the all clear now I wouldnt wish it on anyone

dublinlady · 20-02-2013 6:41pm

I get the weirdest of looks as I have to carry my one yr old on top of my 30 wk bump - she perches on it! It's uncomfortable but what am I meant to do - she can't walk - am I meant to put her on a lead and ask her to crawl around behind me?!?!

Funny tho... My family are totally unsympathetic as all have kids so know & understand u just have to get on with it!!!

MurdyWurdy · 20-02-2013 6:53pm

I feel bad having a moan again but my family are driving me around the bend, for the opposite reason that you are Synyster! My mum usually goes on holiday in the summer with my aunt, uncle and two cousins. They're going this year the first 2 weeks in July and I'm due the 24th June. My mum has said she can't go as i might go late.

Anyway, that results in me hearing moaning from my aunt and mum that my 12 year old cousin is "very upset" and "perturbed" that my mum won't be going with the this year and is telling everyone she hopes I have the baby early so my mum can go because obviously, the world revolves around her (she is very very spoiled). I told my mum I'd like to have her around when the baby is born. My aunt (and to a lesser extent my mum) keep saying they didn't have their mum around when they had babies and I should ""let my mum go with them" because obviously my cousin being slightly put out is more important than me having my first baby.

I spoke to my mum in private and explained that my husband has no family in Ireland and if something happens to me he'll need help. She said she knew that and would only book flights the day before to go out and meet them if I don't go late with the baby. I can only hope that for the most part they were joking about my cousin being so upset and with me about it they actually didn't give her any time about it but I'm just fuming. I just wish someone would shake my cousin and tell her the world doesn't revolve around her - so what if she wants my mum to be there. How is that the more important of the two things? If some of it is joking I really don't find it very funny.

I know it's probably hormonal but I'm just raging, I feel so unsupported. My friend's sister had a baby and she was due the end of January -her mum postponed a holiday she was going to take in March to be around to help her. Anyway, my mum just rang up about another family matter - my uncle needed some details from me which I texted last week and he replied to say thanks. Now he's claiming he never got them and I'm holding something important up and he told my aunt, who told my mum who rang me :rolleyes: I'm just fed up of the lot of them, tbh. I got really upset on the phone with my mum but it's just all of it on top of me at once.

Sorry for the big rant ladies, I really needed to get that out!

Synyster Shadow · 20-02-2013 7:23pm

MW- I wish I had family that would put something off for me, I cant even get them to help when there doing nothing. Your cousin has obviously been spoiled a little too much by mummy! My two little sisters are spoiled by there mum (dads partner) and me and dad cant handle it cause it was never that way with me. You have a right to feel off with her not been around as this is my first I find little things all the way up to big things stress me out big style. took me awhile to wanna drive anywhere alone I felt something would go wrong etc... Your in the perfect place for a moan and sympathy and you have my fullest sympathy!!!!

wolfpawnat · 20-02-2013 9:00pm

MW, your mother needs to tell your aunt "She (your cousin) is your daughter, mine is having her first child, my priority is her. If the baby is here fine, if not, then it's not. End of discussion." as for the little witch, she needs a good dose of cop on, leave her with me for a weekend, I'd have her behaving like a normal person by the end of it

And without in anyway harming her!!!

So let me get this straight, your aunt is saying that it is important your mother is there since they did not have their mother growing up? That is all the more reason she should be with you, afterall, YOU'RE HAVING A FÚCKING BABY!!!!!! It is top priority FFS!!!! That is more important that two weeks with a little spoilt brat!!!!

I am sorry, but I am actually shaking in rage here! I don't have any family, seriously, I am all alone with no one but my OH. His mother is on the other side of Ireland, so we can't even depend on her, so I know what you mean about your husband.

MurdyWurdy · 20-02-2013 9:43pm

Thanks for your rage on my behalf! My cousin does need a good shake-up though - I hadn't said anything to my husband before tonight but he was raging as well.

My mum is staying here but both her and my aunt are putting major guilt trips on me that a) my mum is missing a holiday and b) my precious cousin won't have her there. I just feel like telling the lot of them to feck off and I'll be fine myself. My hubby reckons I need to tell my mum that if she wants to stay and be here when the baby is born it's up to her but not to guilt trip me about it and tell my aunt the same. I don't know how many times she has said to me "will you let me go - I need your permission""

wolfpawnat · 20-02-2013 9:54pm

MurdyWurdy wrote: »

Thanks for your rage on my behalf! My cousin does need a good shake-up though - I hadn't said anything to my husband before tonight but he was raging as well.

My mum is staying here but both her and my aunt are putting major guilt trips on me that a) my mum is missing a holiday and b) my precious cousin won't have her there. I just feel like telling the lot of them to feck off and I'll be fine myself. My hubby reckons I need to tell my mum that if she wants to stay and be here when the baby is born it's up to her but not to guilt trip me about it and tell my aunt the same. I don't know how many times she has said to me "will you let me go - I need your permission""

Ah now, if she is that desperate for a hollie there are 52 weeks in a year! Pick any of them not near the 24th of June. For goodness sake I know countless families that have altered plans because of imminent arrivals of grandchildren.

So what if the princess won't have her there, if princess (my new name for the cousin) means more than a grandchild, then off with her.....I would not be a good person to have around your family right now!!! Your husband is right, tell her if she wants to be here, then please stop the guilt trip, if she rather go, then go, but don't think you won't remember it. I rather be alone than have people around me making the most important time in my life a misery. I would love to have a mum around to be here for me, but it's not an option. This sort of thing pisses me off no end. I am now a mixture of angry and upset, my OH thinks I've lost my mind, I am nearly in tears!!! No joke!

Blueskye · 20-02-2013 9:58pm

Gosh that's an awful position to be put in Murdy. Of course you'll need your mum when baby is born. I can't believe your cousin is being flouted as the one who will miss out. Surely you're the priority? I'd be pretty annoyed with your mum too. Even if nothing were to happen to you, surely you'd need help from your mum as well as your husband? You shouldn't be made feel guilty for that. I mean, holidays can happen anytime, first baby being born is kindof more important IMO.

wolfpawnat · 20-02-2013 10:04pm

Blueskye wrote: »

first baby being born is kindof more important IMO.

Even if it were the fifth I would see it as more important than a 12 year old niece. I went without family help, it is so much harder without it. The selfishness is unreal!

MurdyWurdy · 20-02-2013 10:06pm

Thanks ladies, I feel better already! My problem is I don't know how much of it is them being serious or not and in my current hormonal state it makes it harder to tell so it all just upsets me. My mum's a big fan of telling me I have no sense of humour when I don't find her and my aunt funny and I really really hate it.

Regardless of their intentions, it's making me feel like crap which I don't think is on. On the surface it all seems so clear, you'd imagine a first grandchild is the priority but it's the guilt trips I hate. I also hate the fact that my mum wants to take off a few days after the baby is born anyway, she's talking about booking flights when the baby is born and we know when he has arrived. Is it selfish to want her around for the first few weeks?

Blueskye · 20-02-2013 10:22pm

Is it selfish to want her around the first weeks? Eh definitely not!! Won't your husband have to go back to work at some point? You'll need her even more then. I would have thought for at least the first 6 weeks. It's a huge change and I'll be wanting my mum around to help for as long as possible. Even just to be around to make you a sandwich or a cup of tea or to take the baby for a few mins while you go to the loo!!!

wolfpawnat · 20-02-2013 10:25pm

MurdyWurdy wrote: »

Is it selfish to want her around for the first few weeks?

No, it is the most terrifying yet amazing few weeks of our lives when they arrive. You know so much both naturally and from reading books, but only a mother or a close female relative can help with some things. I learnt the wipe trick for boys off a friend. It took me six weeks of being alone Monday to Friday 8-late to learn it. Take it from someone who had only a partner who was out all day working. You need someone, if only to take them and wind them while you shower. I went days without showers freaking about the baby being alone while I was doing it.

It is understandable that your mother has raised her children and wants to relax for herself, but as I said, there are 52 weeks in the year. It doesn't have to be late June/July she goes somewhere.

Neyite · 21-02-2013 11:26am

MurdyWurdy wrote: »

Thanks ladies, I feel better already! My problem is I don't know how much of it is them being serious or not and in my current hormonal state it makes it harder to tell so it all just upsets me. My mum's a big fan of telling me I have no sense of humour when I don't find her and my aunt funny and I really really hate it.

Regardless of their intentions, it's making me feel like crap which I don't think is on. On the surface it all seems so clear, you'd imagine a first grandchild is the priority but it's the guilt trips I hate. I also hate the fact that my mum wants to take off a few days after the baby is born anyway, she's talking about booking flights when the baby is born and we know when he has arrived. Is it selfish to want her around for the first few weeks?

Murdy, you have my sympathies, they are really putting pressure on you.

Having said that, if your mother is guilt-tripping you now, are you sure that you want to endure the whole "and I missed my holiday because of you.." for months or years afterwards? I think the 12yo is being an utter brat and your aunt not much better, but if it were me and my mother was giving me the hang-dog expression and "asking my permission to go" I'd just tell her to go and recruit supportive friends to pop around instead, or ask them to sort out groceries or prepare meals for you, bring the baby in the bouncer into the bathroom to shower or whatever.

Its also worth bearing in mind that it can be very special and intimate time for you and your partner at home with your newborn, sending her away for the first couple of weeks might work out very well for you. Dont get me wrong, I know you badly want your mother to be there, but do you want her there in a mood when you are trying recover from the birth, dealing with hormones, maybe getting to grips with breastfeeding (if you are doing that) getting to know the wonder of your new baby is such a special time, you dont want to look back and have that bloody holiday overshadowing it.

lazygal · 21-02-2013 11:34am

I know there's more serious moans.

But I'm sick of being sick. I thought things might be different second time around and getting past 12 weeks would make a difference but it's dawning on me that I'm going to be just as sick the whole time on this pregnancy as I was on the last. Pity party for me.

:(:(:(:(

Pat McGhee · 21-02-2013 12:06pm

MurdyWurdy wrote:

Is it selfish to want her around for the first few weeks?

Omg MW, I am RAGING here on your behalf! NO, of course you're not being selfish, imo its your mum who's the selfish one, her and your aunt and the little brat of a cousin! Jesus, guilt tripping you at a time like this!? Especially when she knows how much of a horrible experience you're having with the ms. They can go on holidays at any time! Lowest of the low imo. Bi*ches. Sorry, but it has to be said. *hugs* Poor pet...

Lazygirl, you have my deepest sympathies as a fellow 12 weeker in the throes of hyperemesis. The whole experience is just horrible, and sucks all the fun out of what is supposed to be such a happy time. *hugs* to you too. :-(

elly123 · 21-02-2013 12:57pm

MurdyWurdy wrote: »

Is it selfish to want her around for the first few weeks?

I really don't think its selfish at all, its only human to want her with you, as everyone else has said she can take a holiday any time and especially that it's the first grandchild you would think she would get her priorities right! If they are taking the P*ss and winding you up thats is really really selfish of them, as for the cousin she is your aunts daughter not your mams so why would the fact your mam not going on hold upset her, the cousin is still getting her holiday seems like the little brat is spoiled and she is jealous of the impending new arrival.

Fortunately for me we have both sets of grandparents around and to be honest i think both our mams might feel a tad put out by the fact im planning on B'feeding so for the first few weeks they wont get much time if any with the baby on their own.

Thankfully i have had a really nice pregnancy with the odd off day here and there.........but for the last 4-5 weeks im getting really bad pain on the right side of my back just at my ribs, i get it from driving and sitting at my desk, it goes away if i go for a walk or when i go to bed, the last two days its really getting worse and im getting a burning sensation with it, last week the GP said to try heat on my back he said it sounds like muscle pain but it doesn't help, physio gave me some exercises to do but they don't seem to relief it at all. Roll on two weeks when i finish up in work!!

The Pregnant Womans Moan Thread.

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