Do you have any odd public transport stories?

Numina · 21-01-2009 10:02pm

I once got the 66 from the City Center and a homeless, solvent abusive woman with silver spray paint all over her mouth/face and coat got on the same bus. When the bus came on to Conyngham road it pulled over and after around a minute of patiently waiting while sitting upstairs, suddenly screams were let out from passengers below. It turned out that the Homeless woman was harassing and attacking passengers, one even crying. We all waited and listened to passengers trying to calm the situation, every minute or so the homeless woman would act up again. The driver had locked the doors to keep the homeless on the bus as he was waiting for the Gardai to arrive. The woman was clearly insane, at one point she aggressively asked a passenger who was attempting to calm her "What d'ya want from me!? What d'ya want!? D'ya want to go to a mountain do ya?"

All ended well when the Gardai came, the driver opened the door and the homeless woman bolted in the opposite direction of the Gardai, but was caught by one of the Gardai using one arm to drag her back. We watched, we waited, and I have 15 minutes audio of it recorded from my Zen, which I'm going to go listen to now.

Vain · 21-01-2009 11:02pm

Peter Powerful Toddler wrote: »

he just thought I was a woman

You mean your not a woman?? So all my dirty pm to you were a waste of time?? Why did you lead me on?:D

Edit: I wasn't the only one to be confused about fradas sexuality. *Hangs head in shame*

nlgbbbblth · 21-01-2009 11:49pm

One wet morning I was on the 18 coming down Waterloo road and someone rang the bell for the second stop on the road [halfway down]. The bus stops and the driver shouts

"Anyone getting off"

No response.
Nobody gets off

He drives on and about a dozen people stand up and walk towards the front of the bus, some ring the bell. They all want to get off at the bottom of the road, by the Xtravision and the turn-off to upper Baggot st.

The traffic lights are green.

The bus fails to stop, drives through the lights and turns right up Pembroke road. Some people say

"You missed the stop. We all wanted to get off back there"

Driver shouts

"F*ck yis! Now you know what it feels like!"

and pulls up at the next stop which is quite a reasonable distance from the previous one. Some alighting passengers berate him about this and he responds with more abusive language - the jist of which is

'I f*ckin hate c*nts trying to shaft me.'

The last guy getting off says 'I wouldn't shaft yer auld one'!

shenanigans1982 · 21-01-2009 11:53pm

When I first started going out with my OH I used to get the bus down to Carlow every Saturday. First time I did this I got my ticket and asked the guy what gate the bus was leaving from. He said " there is one leaving from gate two right now." I grabbed my ticket and ran for the bus, getting on just before he pulled away.

About 2 and a half hours later I got a text from her asking if I was nearly there. Turns out to bus to Longford doesn't go through Carlow.

nlgbbbblth · 22-01-2009 12:11am

This will take four seconds of your time.

STAND CLEAR - LUGGAGE DOORS OPERATING

http://www.irelandlogue.com/files/2006/12/r09_0100.MP3

towel401 · 22-01-2009 12:29am

nlgbbbblth wrote: »

This will take four seconds of your time.

STAND CLEAR - LUGGAGE DOORS OPERATING

http://www.irelandlogue.com/files/2006/12/r09_0100.MP3

who`se voice is that?

Acacia · 22-01-2009 12:32am

nlgbbbblth wrote: »

The last guy getting off says 'I wouldn't shaft yer auld one'!

Fcukin' brilliant!:pac:

One time I was sitting downstairs on the bus, from town back to my gaff, with my ma. We were sitting on the seat just in front of the back seat, facing the driver. A middle-aged chap gets on the bus and begin walking towards the back,stopping every so often to shake randomers' hands and asking them, "Hello, how are you?" in weird, fake, posh accent.

"Maybe he's just really friendly...", I innocently thought. Not so. He began to rant and rave for the entire bus journey, mostly about the government, the church and sex, like some madder version of Father Jack. The couple sitting beside him fecked off up-stairs (don't blame them), and gradually more and more people , moved away from him.

Throughout the whole journey, everybody was doing a wonderful job pretending not to hear him, until he hopped off the bus merrily on his way.

Madser.

Nightwish · 22-01-2009 12:35am

I got on the 40C on Gardiner St, when I was in fact waiting for the 40A. I had to get away from a crusty homeless man who was harassing me. I told the bus driver I'd get off just around the corner at Dorset St. The driver said, dont worry I'll get you to Finglas. The route terminated at Finglas village, and I was going to Finglas west...the driver insisted on bringing me home...on a dublin bus

22-01-2009 12:38am

Nightwish wrote: »

I got on the 40C on Gardiner St, when I was in fact waiting for the 40A. I had to get away from a crusty homeless man who was harassing me. I told the bus driver I'd get off just around the corner at Dorset St. The driver said, dont worry I'll get you to Finglas. The route terminated at Finglas village, and I was going to Finglas west...the driver insisted on bringing me home...on a dublin bus

That was nice of him.

Bus drivers certainly have a rep for being assholes but it's by no means all of them.

CamperMan · 22-01-2009 12:42am

I hate public transport, not used it for many years, the last time I used it was when some dirty, smelly 30 stone bloke sat beside me, burping, farting, sneezing, horrible, that was the last straw!!!

Pen1987 · 22-01-2009 12:51am

I travel on the 76A and 78A everyday. The amount of stories I have is unreal. The best one I can think of right now is - this junkie couple get on in Ballyfermot Village, same as me, no seats downstairs. I head upstairs, only seat is down the back. I jump in the second-last seat on the right. The couple jump in the last seat on the left and immediately lean down and start rolling...

It soon becomes clear that they dont have enough contents for their roll. An argument ensues... "Jaysin... dah' gear was meant to last you tree day-yezs! You only gorrit today ye stupih fuk", "shurrip it's grand", "yeh'll git sick", "I won't it's grand"... conversation continues, all the "gear" has been stuck into the papers and its still not enough to make a full roll.

"Here, giza birra bit will ya?" he says to her...

He then pulls out a blade and chomps off a lump of her greasy long hair, sticks it into the roll, licks the paper, rolls it, lights it and smokes it.

This wasn't even that odd for the 78A, it's just the one I can remember today.

Captain Darling · 22-01-2009 1:02am

I was getting the train up to Athlone a few years ago and there was this old wino shouting and roaring on the train, all the way from Galway. He looked a bit like the old guy in the Life of Brian that took the vow of silence. Anyways when the train arrived into Athlone, four Gardai were waiting to take him off it.

They got on the train and he started giving them dogs abuse. I was stuck behind them and had to wait until they lifted him physically out of the train.

I hung around on the platform to see what else happened. The wino then started a sit down protest on the platform and there was more fcuking and blinding coming from. The cops were getting extremely pissed off with him.

Two of them went either side of him, linked his arms and lifted him up. As the wino was being lifted up his trousers fell down. Everybody on the train and the platform got a full frontal of his bollox. It was like time stood still, because the cops didnt know what to do. He was just being held up, with his meat and two veg dangling around the place for all the world to see. There was people staring out the windows of the train with their mouths open and grannies covering their eyes. The wino was fcuking oblivious to the fact his wedding tackle was hanging out.

The cops who were not lifting him, pulled up his pants. He was then dragged off the platform and fcuked into the back of a paddy wagon.

kmart6 · 22-01-2009 1:05am

MIne would involve the Luas. You know the people who stand there asking for your change/show people how to use the machine?! Well there was 2 lad's mouthing off at each other at Stephens Green yesterday.

Guy 1 ''This is me bleeding spot,fuck off''
Guy 2 ''No fuck you I'm always here!!!''

Anyway this continues on for while but in between there sentances they were throwing in the ''Any change for a hostel?!'' line and then continuing abusing each other.

The even better one was the 2 of them were there again today happy out talking to each other bout how they haven't seen ''Fat Fred'' in ages!!!!

Arcee · 22-01-2009 1:32am

When I was around 15 or 16 I was headed into Dublin city centre one Saturday evening to meet my mates. I sat down beside some random guy on the bus without taking too much notice of him. A little while into the trip I could see him staring at me and my legs (was wearing a skirt) with glazed, vacant eyes. He was swaying around like he was about to nod off in his seat and I figured that he was fairly stoned or hammered. Was a little uncomfortable but ok until he started fumbling around inside his jacket and I realised he had his lad out and was pulling himself off while looking at my legs. A few of the other passengers copped it at the same time and everyone started shouting at him. He was so baked he took no notice and just kept at it despite looking like he was gonna fall asleep at any minute. Gross and disturbing experience for a poor, innocent girl! *shudder*

dSTAR · 22-01-2009 2:27am

I was traveling on the Northern Line one time in London and this homeless dragster wearing a faux fur coat, a pair of ladies tights and not much else got on. He sat down in front of me and crossed his legs as would any lady dressed in such attire. The only thing was he forgot to tuck himself under. The look on the business mans face sitting next to him reading the Financial Times was priceless

Zwillinge · 22-01-2009 2:49am

The joys of Dublin Bus.

Once waiting on a bus to town while it was freezing cold, a guy just arrived at the stop and asked me how long I was waiting. I said ten minutes, then ten minutes later he went on a rant about how terrible buses were, how cold it was, how he was going to be late, how the bus was ruining his night. The bus finally came and we were both standing, of course he said "Typical!"
He got off after 2 stops...it was a five minute walk, not even.

Another time on the bus, I usually sit downstairs thinking less 39 Blanchardstown scumbags. Nope, some drunken woman gets on with a black suitcase. She sits down and asks the girl across from her does she have a light, the girl shakes her head and the woman starts calling her the most foul names known to man. She then proceeds to open the suitcase and removing bottles of vodka and whatever else.

Was sitting in the front of the bus and was reading a magazine that had differnt sexual positions in it - you know the "10 ways to improve your love life" articles that don't really do much for you - either way I'm engrossed in this and an elderly nun sits beside me. I look up for a moment and see her staring at me, then at my magazine and sharply exclaims "Are you ok?!?"
When she left after giving me the sign of the cross, another woman sat beside me in a big fur coat and she smelt of urine and cheese and onion crisps. Weirdest combo.

Not too weird I suppose but this Halloween, I was on the way home from a party and an aul wan sits next to me and starts telling me how horrid Halloween is and wasn't I a good girl not going out last night, depsite not telling her anything about myself. She then proceeded to tell me all about her sons trip to Disneyland with his 4 children and during a recession! I tell ya!

My OH was on a bus and a lady wrote him and everyone on the bus a Christmas card. Nice for July :pac:

Soby · 22-01-2009 3:13am

right these aren't mine there outta the "More overheard in Dublin " book..i just remembered it when i seen the topic title so thought id share some of the ones with ya..

On the 130 bus some bird on her phone:

"Hiye, yea, listen we're going te Skerries....no man, Skerries...What d'ye mean? Can ye not hear me?SKERRIES! S.C.A.R.Y.S"....

"I got onto the no. 78A bus, found no seats downstairs so decided to try upstairs. I found one empty seat and was about to sit down when some blike yells "HERE MISSUS, I wouldn't sit there if i were you I just pissed there!

Nitelink home heading to Clonsilla. The bus was packed upstairs at 3am. A man up the top of the bus stand up and asks.
" Does anyone mind if i take a piss?"
At that, everyone lifts up their feet towards their chests, nothing said...

Little girl on the bus, after spotting a fly
(roaring); "Look, Dad, a bastard!"..

Im sure theres funnier ones somewhere..Im gonna read it for my own amusement and post any more i seee:)

Emmsy · 22-01-2009 4:02am

Getting the 16A from town one evening and it was packed. Two junkies get on on and sit down across from this old man. The three of them obviously locked.
Anyway few minutes into the journey the man junkie turns and says to the woman junkie 'jaysus yer man looks like Miley of Glenroe dun'e' Woman agrees and shouts over to the old man 'Miley ya wanna come for one down the auld triangle with us? We never met anyone of the telly before.'
'Miley' says 'ah **** off would ya's'
Woman: 'Ah come on miley don't be a feckin dry arse'
And so on and so forth.
So we arrive at the Auld Triangle and the couple make their way through the people and before they get off the bus they stand at the door for around a minute shouting at 'miley' to come with them. They get off and knock on the side of the bus shouting 'miley we never got an autograph will ya send us one will ya?' And they go on their merry way.
'Miley' sits on the bus giving out about the state of young people in Dublin today and how drinking has gotten out of hand. He then stands and yells at the bus driver 'Will ya lemme off at the Big Tree? I want a feckin' pint!'
'Miley' gets off and the whole bus erupts into laughter. Made the journey in friday evening traffic go a lot faster.

ahmed89 · 22-01-2009 1:20pm

Do you have any odd public transport stories?

no,not really,i just hate them,but i got my first car yesterday,so no more buses for me:D

tallaght01 · 22-01-2009 1:28pm

Drinking buckfast at a bus stop with 2 homeless guys when I wasn't even getting a bus was a real low point in my life :P

Krieg · 22-01-2009 2:33pm

No story that compares to any of the previous mentioned story's,

But one time (Galway), me and my sister were getting a bus to the Merlin hospital to visit our grandmother. On the way, a crazy old women gets on and immediately starts swearing at everyone on the bus. "F*ck off", "F*ck you" to each person as she walks down the aisle and sits down. (I know it sounds like tourettes, but ive seen the disease before and im pretty sure it wasn't). Then she started swearing at each person the bus went past and stuck her finger up at them, which was hilarious. The shocked expression on each person who passed nearly floored me.
Bus arrives at the hospital and she gets off as well. Me and my sis walked slowly to get a bit of distance between us but it didn't stop her turning around every 10 seconds to shout the same abuse at us.
Unsurprisingly, we saw her walk into the psychiatric building.

ROCKMAN · 22-01-2009 2:36pm

nlgbbbblth wrote: »

One wet morning I was on the 18 coming down Waterloo road and someone rang the bell for the second stop on the road [halfway down]. The bus stops and the driver shouts

"Anyone getting off"

No response.
Nobody gets off

He drives on and about a dozen people stand up and walk towards the front of the bus, some ring the bell. They all want to get off at the bottom of the road, by the Xtravision and the turn-off to upper Baggot st.

The traffic lights are green.

The bus fails to stop, drives through the lights and turns right up Pembroke road. Some people say

"You missed the stop. We all wanted to get off back there"

Driver shouts

"F*ck yis! Now you know what it feels like!"

and pulls up at the next stop which is quite a reasonable distance from the previous one. Some alighting passengers berate him about this and he responds with more abusive language - the jist of which is

'I f*ckin hate c*nts trying to shaft me.'

The last guy getting off says 'I wouldn't shaft yer auld one'!

Different Class of Drivers down here:D

Three years back, just after moving into my new house , my first time ever using the first bus of the day. As I was working up the country that day had arranged for my lift to collect me near the end of bus route.
Anyway arrives and catches for bus and take off for city centre , next thing I know, the bus has left normal route and is heading to big local industrial estate at the opposite side of the city . (about 2/3 miles away from pick up point).I approach the driver and tell him my trouble .(thinking we may be heading into the city after the estate )He informs me that NO . first bus is always a SHUTTLE SERVICE from my new housing estate to the industrial estate and back.

.

But as I am thinking of my options ,
He say don't worry " I'LL DROP YOU IN "

They're not all assholes , some are even legends

Fizman · 22-01-2009 2:41pm

Dublin has more taxis than New York city. Now theres a fcukin odd public transport story.

rainbow kirby · 22-01-2009 2:45pm

Well, the worst is the African guy who decided to have a **** while sitting beside me on a crowded rush-hour 49.
I've also seen skangers have a domestic at the back of the 25A several times, I've seen fights on pretty much every bus route I've ever had to get regularly too.
I've seen one Down's Syndrome person call another person with Down's retarded on the 17 (sorta felt bad about cracking up laughing at that one...) and I've also seen 2 kids throw their running spikes at each other on the same route.

Draupnir · 22-01-2009 2:51pm

Fizman wrote: »

Dublin has more taxis than New York city. Now theres a fcukin odd public transport story.

Not that odd, considering New York has a working alternative in the Subway. Dublin has so many taxis as part of the cruel game known as "Getting the Bus".

It involves people standing at the side of the road for random periods of time looking in the direction of the oncoming traffic and wondering how long they can wait for a bus to appear before they have to hail a taxi or else be late at their destination. Hence, Dublin needs taxis.

I feel nearly sure that the Taxi Drivers Union pays Dublin Bus a fee to create these bus
stops of desperate people in fact.

The other game I like to play at the bus stop is "Whatever comes next, I'm getting it". A bus has yet to defeat a taxi in this game for me, the day someone flies a helicopter round that corner offering lifts I am in trouble.

mp3guy · 22-01-2009 3:03pm

Fizman wrote: »

Dublin has more taxis than New York city. Now theres a fcukin odd public transport story.

Source please

Cuddlesworth · 22-01-2009 3:45pm

The population of Co.Dublin(not just the city) is around 1 million. The population of New York is supposed to be around 8 million, surrounding areas included it goes to 18 million.

How exactly can we sustain more taxis?

T.G Catter · 22-01-2009 3:55pm

There was one time I was waiting on the 77 which was due at 19.45, and it actually arrived at 19.45. That was a particularly odd Dublin Bus moment.

ahmed89 · 22-01-2009 3:59pm

T.G Catter wrote: »

There was one time I was waiting on the 77 which was due at 19.45, and it actually arrived at 19.45. That was a particularly odd Dublin Bus moment.

ya,happened to me once and i could not believe it was on time

but never happened again:(

Wood · 22-01-2009 4:26pm

mp3guy wrote: »

Source please

http://www.planetizen.com/node/36304

There are about 16,000 licensed taxis in Dublin, up from about 2,800 in the late 1990s. That's a lot of taxis. New York City, which is 7 or 8 times bigger than Dublin (population 1.2-million), has about 13,000 licensed cabs.

Do you have any odd public transport stories?

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