Dr Ferrari's Camper Van (off-topic discussion)

doozerie wrote: »

When doing turbo sessions where I'm doing stints for specified time periods though, so basically I am watching various numbers, I find it hard to watch a DVD. For those sessions I listened to music instead. It came as quite a surprise to me to find that my ears sweat. A lot. I had trouble keeping the earphones in my ears. There, I've outed myself as an ear sweater now

I've gone thru at least 4 pairs of iPhone headphones from sweating them to death.

Ear sweating?

/me never looks at cycling forum again

cdaly_ wrote: »

Which old fogey were you? I was the one with the Jimmy Page hairdo...

His hairdo in 2007 or back in the day? If the latter - kudos! Watched it in Dun Laoghaire and it was a bit like a MAMIL convention but without the lycra - if you get my meaning. Volume was way too low but maybe they thought they had to go gentle on whatever hearing we have left!

It's Friday.

I'll just put this here........inside Ferrari's camper van

Qualitymark wrote: »

Bus drivers and passengers are talking about cyclists here

http://www.boards.ie/vbulletin/showthread.php?t=2056779290&page=21

if anyone feels like weighing in.

No need, I have some rusty needles here I can just jam in my eyes now.

Lusk Doyle wrote: »

We need to find this listening device, and quickly. It's in here somewhere :eek:

It may be too late!:eek:

They expected to formally conclude their investigation in a month’s time and so the full details will soon emerge.

170km solo today. Fine weather but bloody tough on your own. A shot of caffeine in Blessington on the way home worked wonders!:)

Many, many cyclists out there today.

Who would have won in a fight back in the day, Hinault or Kelly?

To the truffle-hunter who nearly took me out in Blackrock this morning:

The lights had turned orange, all the cars were coming to a stop. Your friend decided that as the light had just turned red, could safely go through.

You, travelling a few seconds behind, decided that even though the light had been red for some time (in traffic terms) and that even though my light had gone green, you could still continue to power through and almost tackle me to the ground.

I was not some boulder to be skidded around, nor was the red light prompting you to hammer it into oncoming traffic.

Make no mistake, had I not been at the top of that queue, but a trigger-happy motorist waiting to gun it on green, you would be spending your morning in different circumstances, at best.

Don't be an idiot, if you want to take your own life in your hands on the trails, be my guest.

Just stop at red ffs!

Junior wrote: »

Any damage done to yourself Dirk ?

Thank God no, I stopped in horror and he sort of swerved behind me and around me without even slowing down...straight toward the cars.

I'm sure he thinks he has awesome mountain biking skills, but testing them out in traffic is not on.

Not sure what would have happened if he had hit me, I was wearing a helmet so at least my hair wouldn't have taken any damage. But he would have totally t-boned me and no doubt it would have been nasty.

I rode through Manor Kildride yesterday while mass was on in the local church. There were cars scattered everywhere, apparently considerate parking is anti-christian or something. Outside of the church were standing quite a few sinners, their heads leaning forward and to the side in that odd way that I only associate with Catholic mass-goers. It's some wierd body language, the downward head bit seems to convey a guilty expression of "I'm a sinner, I'm a disgrace", the head tilted sideways bit seems to convey a feisty attitude of "but fukkit, I don't care". I haven't been to mass in years, but I suspect years of "training" in my youth would cause me to instantly adopt the same manner myself if I went back.

Anyway, the priest's voice was booming out onto the road, presumably there is a loudspeaker at the church entrance. I could hear every word as I went past, which made me shudder a bit - the priest obviously came from the same training academy as the priests in my parents' parish 'cos his voice and delivery were laced with the same patronising tones that I associate with trips to the church in my childhood. It made me think though, the circumstances were perfect for drive-through mass. And then I wondered whether I'd just been subjected to cycle-through mass and whether my soul was now saved as a result (I used to be an altar boy, bless me, but I've since strayed). Maybe I had been transformed into a better person all of a sudden.

It seems that I was destined to put that to the test. A few minutes later, a woman in a car coming the other way decided to overtake the cyclist in front of her. She pulled right over to my side of the road, and drove straight at me. She passed within a couple of feet of me, at speed. If she'd had a sticker on a car it would have read "How's your Christian charity?". Well, I didn't lob a water bottle at her car (there was no time), so one gold catholic star for me. I did utter "sweet Jesus" though, which could be construed as loud and spontaneous worship, though the tone wasn't entirely one of celebration, and the single raised finger that I was at pains to attract her attention to probably set a less than forgiving tone too. Maybe my heart was indeed still filled with the love of god, but it was beating so hard that it was difficult to say.

Roll on the next test. Coming down from Sallygap at speed I was almost in the middle of a big mound of gravel on a bend before it even became visible. The "Ffffuuuuccckkkk!" that I uttered almost cancelled out the gold star from earlier, but I reckoned that the pope himself would have been rattled in the circumstances so I applied some self-christian charity and forgave myself. Two bends later though and despite the fact that a cautious pedestrian on the other side of the road had stepped completely off the road and anto the verge, a car coming up the hill decided that it should swing completely over to my side of the road and away from the pedestrian "just in case". That left me with sod-all space and certainly not enough space to pick a line on the bend that would allow me to get round the corner without ending up on my ear on the other side of the ditch. It also wasn't clear that I wouldn't pile head first into the car, given that they were still drifting further over to me side. I hauled on the brakes. It didn't seem like it would be enough. So I invoked the devil's braking incantation. There was no disguising it this time, my "Jeeesuusss Chriiiiiist!" was quite clearly hollered in a blasphemic tone. I didn't even add a "please" to the "SHOVE OVERRRRR!" that I yelled immediately afterwards. The car driver looked entirely unworried. I made it round the bend, just.

That answered the question then, my soul hadn't been saved, I remained a god-less sinner. So I embraced the fact, and as I came down Cruagh Road I mumbled various profanities to myself about the car driver ahead of me who drove the whole thing with his brake lights permanently on. Annoying feckin' thing about car brake lights, they give no indication of whether the driver is lightly pushing on the brake pedal or trying to drive the pedal through the floor of the car, so you've got little warning of whether the car is slowing gently or stopping suddenly. Staying far enough back is the only way to deal with that dilemma, but on a road where you are freewheeling faster than the big jalopy in front of you is moving, things get tricky to say the least. And when the road rises upwards, and you are still freewheeling faster than the car in front, it goes from tricky to downright annoying.

So on the next downhill bit, when another car pulled out from a side road in front of me and pretty much stopped dead while they searched for the make-car-go-vroom pedal, I was well primed for a heathen outburst. I couldn't actually be bothered though, I was just resigned to the situation by then, so after hauling on the brakes all I could bring myself to do was to throw my hands up in the air in that universal "what are ye like?" manner. The car driver actually stuck their hand up to acknowledge it though, which was a pleasant surprise, so the ride actually finished on a positive note. Well, mostly positive, the fact that I'll eventually burn in the fires of hell takes some of the shine off.