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Young girls paying to lose their virginity

2

Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 18,239 ✭✭✭✭WindSock


    Thaedydal wrote: »
    Even if you have your hymen broken and have used dildos it is still not the sames as the feeling of a man being inside you and moving in and out and around. The pressure of them, the touch, the sight and smell and the noises that sex makes can be very strange.

    Plus a dildo doesnt wipe itself on the curtain when it's done ;)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,181 ✭✭✭LolaDub


    Dudess wrote: »
    I agree Lola, but you know what? Sex with someone you're in love with... well it's too amazing for words for those of us who have been lucky enough to experience it... but it doesn't happen for everyone. We're conditioned to believe it's an inevitability but it isn't. So then, you go for the nowhere-near-as-wonderful option - e.g. this one - and while it's nothing like being with someone whom you're mad about, at least you're getting to experience sex... and yes, finding out what all the fuss is about.

    Thanks dudess. I wasn't just discussing love, just some emotion and attraction. I think nearly everyone would have been with someone they had feelings for at some stage and its a wonderful experience, being with someone you love is mind blowing but you're right that doesn't happen for everyone. Just because of that i don't think its enough to give up altogether


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,420 ✭✭✭JaneyMc


    Thaedydal wrote: »
    Even if you have your hymen broken and have used dildos it is still not the sames as the feeling of a man being inside you and moving in and out and around. The pressure of them, the touch, the sight and smell and the noises that sex makes can be very strange.

    There is in the usa a growning number of what are called body workers.
    They are professional sexual surrogates who work with people who have sexual dysfunction
    ( which in some cases is from abuse/rape ) but it is done as treatment and prescribed by a therapist.


    I never considered the fact they might not have had sex and their hymens had broken in other ways.

    So these sexual surrogates, they are legal sex workers then? Do they have full intercourse if that's what the client requires to help get over what ever issues they might have?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 37,215 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    Young women (late teens, 20s)... it's a shame all right. However, a more mature woman - e.g. in her 30s/40s - it's not a bad idea because the pressure they're under must be terrible (real or imagined). Channel 4 showed a documentary on people who are virgins late in life and one of them was a woman in her 40s who paid an escort, and she seemed delighted with the decision and how things went.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,497 ✭✭✭✭Dragan


    WindSock wrote: »
    Plus a dildo doesnt wipe itself on the curtain when it's done ;)

    Neither does a penis. ;)


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 37,215 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    There's a thread near this one called "Remove stains". Now both threads are inextricably caught up with each other in my mind...


  • Subscribers Posts: 19,425 ✭✭✭✭Oryx


    Dragan wrote: »
    Neither does a penis. ;)
    I think most of the men who are slovenly enough to wipe themselves in the furnishings dont bother going as far as the window. The sheets do just fine. And yeah, dont accuse the poor ol penis. I blame the owners, personally.

    Im not really qualified to comment here. Me and my virginity parted company so many years ago that abstinence was taught as birth control in schools and the world wide web was science fiction. At the time I suppose I saw it as a precious commodity, something that should be revoked with a lot of ceremony. When the reality is that its awkward, painful and often a bloody mess. Having it built up as something wonderful means that how it actually happens can make you feel like a failure. But to get rid of it as a financial transaction is a failure to me too.

    The importance of the first time would be for me that youre with someone you chose because you liked them, ideally. Someone you have a rapport with so you can relax. It may not be wonderful, but at least it was real. I just hate the idea that this, like everything else in the world, is becoming less about emotion and joy and more about ticking a box and saying: done. It took me a lot of time to learn that the best sex was not just about physical gymnastics, but the whole mind and body experience. Something like this puts the poor girls who do it waaaaaaaaaaay back down the line in terms of learning that. To use the dance analogy, you can learn the steps, but until you begin to feel and enjoy it with your partner, youre only halfway there.


  • Moderators, Science, Health & Environment Moderators Posts: 6,376 Mod ✭✭✭✭Macha


    It's very sad that girls are feeling this way - that their virginity is some sort of burden. I had heard of young men doing this but never young women. I mentioned in an earlier thread about prostitution that many male clients have issues with responsibility and it appears to be the same thing here.

    The girls are feeling too much responsibility/pressure to please the other partner and be some sort of sex vixen so they go to a person who is paid not to put that pressure on them. As Dragan pointed out, sex is about 2 people and going to a prostitute means you don't have to worry about the other person.


  • Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    Dudess wrote: »
    There's a thread near this one called "Remove stains".

    Ive avoided that thread. is it actually about... THAT? :eek:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,497 ✭✭✭✭Dragan


    taconnol wrote: »
    It's very sad that girls are feeling this way - that their virginity is some sort of burden. I had heard of young men doing this but never young women. I mentioned in an earlier thread about prostitution that many male clients have issues with responsibility and it appears to be the same thing here.

    The girls are feeling too much responsibility/pressure to please the other partner and be some sort of sex vixen so they go to a person who is paid not to put that pressure on them. As Dragan pointed out, sex is about 2 people and going to a prostitute means you don't have to worry about the other person.

    Actually, in Guam, it is common practice for girls to hire the services of a "wandering salesman" for want of a better word, as virgin brides are not desirable.

    So it is rather predominant in some cultures for various reasons.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 2,537 ✭✭✭Gyalist


    Interesting discussion, but I'm very sceptical of the original article itself. Sounds very much like a clever marketing stunt. free publicity for the businesses concerned and a potentially new market and revenue stream for them to tap into.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,816 ✭✭✭Acacia


    Dudess wrote: »
    Where's the guarantee you'll meet "the right person" though? I agree people shouldn't feel under so much pressure sexually, but I can understand the mindset of someone who's sick of waiting and just wants to experience it - if that's with a "professional lover", all the better.


    Not necessarily the 'right person' as in the love of their life or 'the one', but just somebody they feel comfortable with. I just find paying somebody to do it a bit cold, personally.

    I think that people put too much of emphasis on sex these days, like it's a competition to see who can lose their virginity first and I think this contributes to the mindset of wanting to 'get it over with'. I can understand your point, and where the girls are coming from, it's just not for me, I guess. :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 37,215 ✭✭✭✭Dudess


    Galvasean wrote: »
    Ive avoided that thread. is it actually about... THAT? :eek:
    You'd better believe it...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 21,191 ✭✭✭✭Latchy


    Be intresting to see the type of guys who are available to these young girls and women .Like are they all Adonis type guys ,great looks ? .If so then it's obiously a turn on sexual thing to be enjoyed and they are no different to young men in that respect who are doing the same .But as mentioned it will be an akward and uncomfortable expierence for many .


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,662 ✭✭✭Trinity


    Dragan wrote: »
    Neither does a penis. ;)

    Nope, only pricks do that ;)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,662 ✭✭✭Trinity


    I was just kidding bout the virginity thing. I doubt people would believe i am still a virgin when they see 2 kids hanging out of my legs. :eek:

    Paying to lose it. Hmmm. I think if i was going to be that clinical about sex i would just go out and have a one night stand or a short fling with someone i didnt care about, or get myself a fcuk buddy to practice on.

    I dont equate sex with love, i dont believe you have to be in love with someone to fcuk them, hell you dont even have to know their name if you are that way inclined, but in my opinion sex improves the longer you are with someone, you get to know them, their fantasies, desires, bodies, what they like what they dont You become more open, less inhibited and more adventurous. And thats not something paying to get deflowered can teach you.


  • Subscribers Posts: 19,425 ✭✭✭✭Oryx


    Imagine the queue when that crowd advertise for escorts. I wonder what prospective candidates put on their cv as education and work experience?

    1995-2000 Fumbling in cinema. Light petting.
    2000-2002 Logistics of shagging in cars.
    2002-present Nightclub doorman and occasional stripogram.

    Two year night class in Locating the clitoris is a must-have.

    Although, now that I come to think of it, maybe these girls are onto something. These escorts must be smarter than the average bear.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 21,191 ✭✭✭✭Latchy


    Trinity1 wrote: »
    a short fling with someone i didnt care about, or get myself a fcuk buddy to practice on.
    When i was younger there were plenty of fcuk buddies around .They were called slappers


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,497 ✭✭✭✭Dragan


    latchyco wrote: »
    When i was younger there were plenty of fcuk buddies around .They were called slappers

    And what about the guys who were with them?

    Legends no doubt?:rolleyes:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 21,191 ✭✭✭✭Latchy


    Dragan wrote: »
    And what about the guys who were with them?

    Legends no doubt?:rolleyes:
    Well actually i agree, it's just some people bandy this americanism word around like ' fcuk buddies ' like ' think i'll just pop into see my fcuk buddie for a few moements '' :p


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  • Subscribers Posts: 19,425 ✭✭✭✭Oryx


    latchyco wrote: »
    Well actually i agree, it's just some people bandy this americanism word around like ' fcuk buddies ' like ' think i'll just pop into see my fcuk buddie for a few moements '' :p
    I dont agree with slapper, as if the womans doing something wrong, but I dont agree with fcuk buddy either. Sex without emotional entanglements is like trying to eat calorie free icecream. No such thing. You might not realise straight away, but do it enough and it will effect you.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,497 ✭✭✭✭Dragan


    Oryx wrote: »
    I dont agree with slapper, as if the womans doing something wrong, but I dont agree with fcuk buddy either. Sex without emotional entanglements is like trying to eat calorie free icecream. No such thing. You might not realise straight away, but do it enough and it will effect you.

    I don't know. "**** buddy" sums it up pretty well for me. Or "friends with benefits" if you prefer.

    I definitely don't agree that just because you have sex with someone that you will end up with feelings for them beyond fondness and friendship.

    It takes a hell of a lot more than a good **** for me to love someone.


  • Subscribers Posts: 19,425 ✭✭✭✭Oryx


    Dragan wrote: »
    I don't know. "**** buddy" sums it up pretty well for me. Or "friends with benefits" if you prefer.

    I definitely don't agree that just because you have sex with someone that you will end up with feelings for them beyond fondness and friendship.

    It takes a hell of a lot more than a good **** for me to love someone.
    Ha, youre so hard core.

    But thats not quite what I meant. I just see the term used for casual shags, I presume that not everyone is being fair and even with it. Its like a licence to not care, sometimes. I see problems with it, cos its not just the noble, even minded folk who use the term and are fond and friendly. The term has hit the zeitgeist, and its becoming so common as to be expected.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 21,191 ✭✭✭✭Latchy


    Oryx wrote: »
    I dont agree with slapper, as if the womans doing something wrong, but I dont agree with fcuk buddy either. Sex without emotional entanglements is like trying to eat calorie free icecream. No such thing. You might not realise straight away, but do it enough and it will effect you.
    I suppose slapper is just an anocrym for 'fcuk buddie ' which in my opinion is equally as bad a term .But in todys lingo to some people it means a regular sexual partner .I was never fond of using the term slapper and was not ( by todays standards ) very promiscuous myself growing up , just pointing out the termonology of the times .


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 13,497 ✭✭✭✭Dragan


    Oryx wrote: »
    Ha, youre so hard core.

    You lost me there?
    But thats not quite what I meant. I just see the term used for casual shags, I presume that not everyone is being fair and even with it. Its like a licence to not care, sometimes. I see problems with it, cos its not just the noble, even minded folk who use the term and are fond and friendly. The term has hit the zeitgeist, and its becoming so common as to be expected.

    Well in fairness, if we were to worry about every word that people use with an incorrect meaning then we'd hardly have time to talk for correcting people.

    A **** buddy is someone you would regularly have sex with , but no boyfriend/girlfriend relationships exist.

    Anyone who would refer to a 1 time shag as a **** buddy is a tool.

    Tbh.


  • Subscribers Posts: 19,425 ✭✭✭✭Oryx


    Dragan wrote: »
    You lost me there?
    I wasnt being serious. Twas referring to your point about it taking a lot more than a shag for you to love someone.


    Well in fairness, if we were to worry about every word that people use with an incorrect meaning then we'd hardly have time to talk for correcting people.

    A **** buddy is someone you would regularly have sex with , but no boyfriend/girlfriend relationships exist.

    Anyone who would refer to a 1 time shag as a **** buddy is a tool.
    Im sorry if Im getting all tangled up in meanings here. Didnt mean to. I suppose what Im getting at is that for every person that a fb relationship works with, you have one where it gets messy. Problems occur and boundaries get blurred. And you see the phrase everywhere, so its getting almost like a thing you are expected to do, sure, doesnt everyone have a fb? And it dont work out for everyone.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 21,191 ✭✭✭✭Latchy


    I would imagine the 'fcuk buddie ' phrase might feel uncool to some if they havent got one ,obiously like the young girls in the thread title looking for one ;)


  • Subscribers Posts: 19,425 ✭✭✭✭Oryx


    latchyco wrote: »
    I would imagine the 'fcuk buddie ' phrase might feel uncool to some if they havent got one ,obiously like the young girls in the thread title looking for one ;)
    Ok you got me. Im only p1ssed cos I have no friends with benefits. Damn.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 21,191 ✭✭✭✭Latchy


    Oryx wrote: »
    Ok you got me. Im only p1ssed cos I have no friends with benefits. Damn.
    Well the young girls in question are looking to loose their virginity .Not sure if they care if the guy is on benifits tbh


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  • Registered Users, Subscribers Posts: 47,247 ✭✭✭✭Zaph


    Oryx wrote: »
    Two year night class in Locating the clitoris is a must-have.

    Two years??? :eek:

    Ffs, we know the general area it's around, how hard can it be to find? :D


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