Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie
Hi all,
Vanilla are planning an update to the site on April 24th (next Wednesday). It is a major PHP8 update which is expected to boost performance across the site. The site will be down from 7pm and it is expected to take about an hour to complete. We appreciate your patience during the update.
Thanks all.

Do you bring a condom?

Options
  • 19-09-2008 5:12pm
    #1
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭


    I vaguely remember something about this in 1st year sociology, and how many women felt it was a slutty thing to do. Do you feel that it is? Its obviously the responsible thing to do, but many women would sooner abdicate that particular responsibility to "the guy". So if on a night out do you bring a condom is basically the question and if so why? If not why not? Thanks.

    Do you bring a condom with you on a night out? 84 votes

    I am a liberated woman and therefore carry condoms
    1% 1 vote
    No condoms are for slutty girls
    39% 33 votes
    No, I because I don't sleep around.
    5% 5 votes
    atari conguar
    53% 45 votes


«13

Comments

  • Options
    #2
    JaneyMc
    Closed Accounts Posts: 1,420 ✭✭✭JaneyMc


    I wouldn't bring one on every night out but if I thought I was going to need it then yeah, in my experience, ya always rely on guys.
    "But are ye not on the pill?" etc.
    There are such things as STD's!!!!
    I don't think it's slutty at all and I would rather be viewed as slutty for carrying a condom, than the other things you have to deal with the repercussions of sex with no protection.


  • Options
    #3
    Nevyn
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,045 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    Bring a condom where ?
    Do you mean carry a condom on you when you go out for an eveing or on a date or when going out with who ever you are in a relationship with ?

    Carrying condoms is not slutty it's sensible and I would rather have it and not need it then not have it and need it.
    Just because a person is carrying a condom does not mean they are going to have sex, it's not a garentee it's back up just in case.

    I do carry condoms have done for the last 12 years, even when in a relationship and not using them with my partner
    I have still gone out with 2 in my bag, hang over from being wro in college and there have been occasions I have given them to women in the ladies who could not get the machine to work or it was empty or to friends.

    Better safe then sorry.


  • Options
    #4
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭brianthebard


    Well I thought it was obvious I meant a night out on the pull, in case of a one night stand, but why stop at that? If you are in a relationship would you have a condom with you just in case he had ran out and forgot to get more, or for some other reason, or would you let the man look after his rubbers? Is it even doubly more likely that if in a relationship you would abdicate condom responsibility to the male?


  • Options
    #5
    Nevyn
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,045 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    In a relationship if I am paying and looking after my side of the contraception then yes I would expect him to get the condoms but I would ocassional by some once I knew what he and we as a couple prefered.


  • Options
    #6
    fonpokno
    Registered Users Posts: 8,375 ✭✭✭fonpokno


    I carry them with me when I'm dating or in a relationship just in case but I never bother carrying them on me when I'm single. It's a responsible thing to do, I never thought there was anything slutty about it!

    That said, I don't generally go out just to score, I just go out for the craic and if I happen to score so be it!


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #7
    ChocolateSauce
    Registered Users Posts: 2,892 ✭✭✭ChocolateSauce


    I haven't been without them after 3 consecutive chances to loose my virginity failed due to lack of them. I take them where ever I take my wallet. They're also handy if a friend needs them, it gets you kudos like you wouldn't believe.

    I think it is very, very hard for a woman to be slutty. If a mature, responsible woman takes a man home every week, she is not a slut. Nor is she a slut if she grabs a guy on a train, does the dirty and then gets off at her stop (no more than the man is anyway). Slut is a term I use only when applying to (usually) teenage girls who get polluted drunk and let loosers do them. Sluts have no self-respect and very little sense of self-preservation. If a woman has either of those things and uses a condom, she cannot, in my mind, be a slut.


  • Options
    #8
    Nevyn
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,045 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    Fair enough to stick one in your wallet for the evening but it should not be stored there long time as it can damage the condom.


  • Options
    #9
    lasorciere
    Registered Users Posts: 9 ✭lasorciere


    I did before marriage. Now I sleep only with husband ;) without condoms. The reason was-venereal disease rather than pregnancy. Unfortunately I wasn't sure in every guy's medical history.


  • Options
    #10
    Crumble Froo
    Registered Users Posts: 8,196 ✭✭✭Crumble Froo


    ha, actually, i was trying to hide a €50 on myself last night, so i didnt spend it, and slotted it in the pocket of my wallet where i keep condoms, under the logic that so often while drunk, i completely fail to remember that the condom's there, so ill probably forget that the €50 was too. feckin worked and everything.

    but yes, since college, have carried a condom with me, just in case, whether in a relationship or not, just cos i know ill never remember to bring it when needed, nad dont wana leave myself in err... a compromising position in that respect, i dont use any other contraceptives.

    wouldnt think twice about anyone carrying them around with them, just seems like the sensible thing to to, to me.


  • Options
    #11
    Rozabeez
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,878 ✭✭✭Rozabeez


    I don't consider it slutty, I think it's quite sensible, but I don't 'sleep around' as you put it. Also, brianthebard, that sounds familiar to me as a 1st year Benson lecture perhaps.


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #12
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭brianthebard


    Don't remember who it was tbh, I really didn't pay attention. If you don't like the phrase sleep around what would you call it?


  • Options
    #13
    LolaLuv
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,496 ✭✭✭LolaLuv


    Liberated women FTW! :D


  • Options
    #14
    [Deleted User]
    Posts: 0 ✭ [Deleted User]


    I don't "sleep around" and I'm offend that you consider myself and the terms liberated and slutty to be mutually exclusive. :mad:


  • Options
    #15
    LolaLuv
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,496 ✭✭✭LolaLuv


    I think slutty is a good thing! I didn't until my gay bff said "I think I'd like it if people thought of me as a slut." Then I realized, hey, nothing wrong with that! Who cares what people think?


  • Options
    #16
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭brianthebard


    Moonbaby wrote: »
    I don't "sleep around" and I'm offend that you consider myself and the terms liberated and slutty to be mutually exclusive. :mad:

    That's not what I was saying (How you got that I don't know) its as Pillypen says, to be slutty is not a bad thing, if you are "liberated" you can come to that conclusion and see yourself as liberated, not slutty. If you are not liberated then you are probably going to see casual sex as a "slutty" thing. So you can be liberated and slutty, or slutty but not liberated, or liberated but not slutty.


  • Options
    #17
    LolaLuv
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,496 ✭✭✭LolaLuv


    brianthebard wrote: »
    That's not what I was saying (How you got that I don't know) its as Pillypen says, to be slutty is not a bad thing, if you are "liberated" you can come to that conclusion and see yourself as liberated, not slutty. If you are not liberated then you are probably going to see casual sex as a "slutty" thing. So you can be liberated and slutty, or slutty but not liberated, or liberated but not slutty.

    How could a person be slutty without being liberated?:confused:


  • Options
    #18
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭brianthebard


    PillyPen wrote: »
    How could a person be slutty without being liberated?:confused:

    Well firstly if they had self esteem issues. But what I meant was more that they would see others (who might consider themselves liberated) to just be sluts, and look at it as a bad thing.


  • Options
    #19
    LolaLuv
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,496 ✭✭✭LolaLuv


    brianthebard wrote: »
    Well firstly if they had self esteem issues. But what I meant was more that they would see others (who might consider themselves liberated) to just be sluts, and look at it as a bad thing.

    Yeah I forgot about self-esteem issues.


  • Options
    #20
    ChocolateSauce
    Registered Users Posts: 2,892 ✭✭✭ChocolateSauce


    Thaedydal wrote: »
    Fair enough to stick one in your wallet for the evening but it should not be stored there long time as it can damage the condom.

    They have a high turnover ;)

    Pillypen, a slut is a bad thing to be. But sleeping around, a slut does not make! I guess we're using different definitions of the word.


  • Options
    #21
    LolaLuv
    Closed Accounts Posts: 2,496 ✭✭✭LolaLuv


    ChocolateSauce wrote: »
    They have a high turnover ;)

    Pillypen, a slut is a bad thing to be. But sleeping around, a slut does not make! I guess we're using different definitions of the word.

    Yes, I think so. In my mind, if someone were to call me a slut I'd think it's because I'm sexually liberated and they're not comfortable with it, which is exactly what it means 90% of the time. Funny that anyone who's ever called me a slut has slept with more men than I have.:rolleyes:


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #22
    Rozabeez
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,878 ✭✭✭Rozabeez


    brianthebard wrote: »
    Don't remember who it was tbh, I really didn't pay attention. If you don't like the phrase sleep around what would you call it?

    I don't have a phrase for it, I just don't tend to sleep with people unless I'm in a relationship with them. I don't dislike the phrase, just haven't really thought about it.


  • Options
    #23
    fits
    Registered Users Posts: 13,250 ✭✭✭✭fits


    Yes I carry them. but silly me and all that, and I'm almost ashamed to admit this, I still have issues with buying them in pharmacies etc.


  • Options
    #24
    Nevyn
    Closed Accounts Posts: 43,045 ✭✭✭✭Nevyn


    I think it depends where you live there is a greated intimidation factor going into what is the only chemist for miles and it's a small one where everyone knows everyones business and a large chain like boots in a big city.

    The security tags which a member of staff has to remove which I have seen in some tescos would put me off buying them there.


  • Options
    #25
    fits
    Registered Users Posts: 13,250 ✭✭✭✭fits


    Theres absolutely no way I'd buy them where I live now. The whole town would know about it within 5 minutes :(


  • Options
    #26
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭brianthebard


    Condom buying and selling is the funniest thing. I remember I bought a pack in a chemist once and the man behind the counter called me sir and stuff like that, being extra polite. When I worked in dunnes it was fun to see the embarassed looks on peoples faces when buying them (not least cause they were buying them from a 17/18 yo) I think I only sold one pack of ky jelly in ten months, teh poor women of Sligo!


  • Options
    #27
    Kotick
    Closed Accounts Posts: 86 ✭✭Kotick


    Personally, I think guys should buy them. It's their junk that's getting wrapped up and I have no idea what size they would need (one size really does not fit all). Better to have one that fits than have one that's too small or big and either breaks or slips off. I'm on the pill, you wrap your own junk. Even though I do use condoms (that in my experience, the men provide), I still get tested for STDs/STIs once a year. The fail rate for condoms is pretty high. Still better than nothing but at least use other forms of birth control. Other forms of birth control should be the ladies job. Get on the pill or get an IUD or the shot etc.

    And no, bringing condoms makes you nothing but sensible. Don't be ashamed to buy them even if the whole town will know about it in 5 minutes. "Oh noes! She protects herself!" Come on now. :P


  • Options
    #28
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭brianthebard


    I agree that both parties should be looking after their own bits, but part of looking after yourself is making sure he's protected/sheathed. Men can't carry pills and give them to dates (and would ye really want us to?) so it may seem a bit unfair but that's the way it is I guess.


  • Options
    #29
    Kotick
    Closed Accounts Posts: 86 ✭✭Kotick


    If both parties aren't happy about the situation (no condoms, no form of anything) then you don't have to have sex. It's up to you. Takes two to tango.


  • Options
    #30
    MizzLolly
    Closed Accounts Posts: 3,556 ✭✭✭MizzLolly


    brianthebard wrote: »
    If you are not liberated then you are probably going to see casual sex as a "slutty" thing. So you can be liberated and slutty, or slutty but not liberated, or liberated but not slutty.

    I understand where you're coming from but the poll does not represent this well. I had difficulty choosing, by saying, 'no I don't sleep around' I felt like I was out of the 'liberated' category. Being in a relationship is a totally different scenario. If a girl goes out with her friends and not 'on the pull' as you phrased it, does it mean she's not liberated? Of course not and you've said this already so I know that's not the angle you were looking at it from but the poll options seem to have huge gaps between them. One extreme to the other. Slutty or repressed.

    I don't see casual sex as a slutty thing. As I said, I found choosing the option on the poll difficult. I don't 'sleep around' casually, so I don't feel the need to carry one with me every single time I go out. I don't think that means I'm not liberated. It means I'm not in a relationship and simply haven't thought about, erm, 'pulling' that night. Mainly because that's not something I ordinarily do.

    The fact that I said 'I simply haven't thought about it' does give weight to your question, maybe I should. You have made me think about it but I still don't think the poll represents our options well.

    Good question/thread. ;)

    Rozabeez wrote: »
    I don't have a phrase for it, I just don't tend to sleep with people unless I'm in a relationship with them. I don't dislike the phrase, just haven't really thought about it.

    Exactly, that's what I was trying to say above.. :o


  • Advertisement
  • Options
    #31
    brianthebard
    Closed Accounts Posts: 16,165 ✭✭✭✭brianthebard


    Sorry about the poll, I threw it together quickly and didn't fully think out the options. However your reply is thought out and considered, and much more informative than a tick of a box could be, so thank you. I realise that it is completely possible to be a modern, liberated woman without having to sleep around.


Advertisement