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Need help with relationship of sorts

  • 25-05-2015 2:21pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 307 ✭✭wolf99


    Hi folks.

    Bit of an issue, the only thing I could think of was to ask for impartial advice :\

    I was dating a woman that I *really* liked, we got on really well, she said she liked me, then she was busy for a week, then nada, zip, nothing on the communicado front.

    I got stressed out about unrelated matters a fortnight after that and sent a message to the lass that probably was ill-advised (it wasn't massively bad, just not the best thing for trying to suss out the situation :rolleyes:).

    Since then there has still been no reply, but I've wanted to apologise, not just to try and get things back on track but to simply apologise for said message.

    I though sending flowers with a note might be nice to do, however while I know her address, she never actually told it to me (it coincidently came up when conversing with mutual friends on FB, no really!)

    So the question is would it be très creepy to send flowers to an address I'm technically not supposed to know or just minorly creepy to the extent that the apology would outweigh it?

    Thanks peeps :o


«13

Comments

  • Closed Accounts Posts: 179 ✭✭mocha please!


    Very creepy. A text or Facebook message with an apology would probably be more appropriate.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,154 ✭✭✭silverfeather


    So the question is would it be très creepy to send flowers to an address I'm technically not supposed to know or just minorly creepy to the extent that the apology would outweigh it?

    It would be creepy.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 34,809 ✭✭✭✭smash


    Stalker level 5


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 12,318 ✭✭✭✭Menas


    You would probably get better advice in the relationships forum op.

    My 2 cents? Dont contact her again unless she contacts you first.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,795 ✭✭✭Red Kev


    She doesn't seem to want to have anything to do with you. So maybe just leave it.

    You could send them to her workplace, but maybe a text is the best option in this case, if she doesn't reply then leave it.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,707 ✭✭✭whatismyname


    If you're not supposed to know her address, I would find it highly inappropriate to send anything there. Stalkery and creepy. Potentially even more so when it's not even an occasion as such.


  • Registered Users Posts: 137 ✭✭engol


    Creepy. Leave it alone now. Move on. Don't apologise either. Just leave her alone.

    Sorry it didn't work out.


  • Registered Users Posts: 307 ✭✭wolf99


    Very creepy. A text or Facebook message with an apology would probably be more appropriate.

    My first reaction, however as I mentioned the non-communicado bit - she's not on FB


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,987 ✭✭✭Tilly


    Leave her alone and move on.


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,074 ✭✭✭pmasterson95


    Just buy a tent and move onto her lawn. Also buy some good binoculars.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 307 ✭✭wolf99


    You would probably get better advice in the relationships forum op.

    My 2 cents? Dont contact her again unless she contacts you first.

    Darn it I did look for a better forum on boards but I cant find anything since boards was restructured a while back :rolleyes:


  • Registered Users Posts: 137 ✭✭engol


    Potentially even more so when it's not even an occasion as such.


    Off topic but fwiw, getting flowers when it's not an occasion as such is hugely better than getting flowers when it is. Like, by a million miles.

    I thought everyone knew this??


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 34,809 ✭✭✭✭smash


    You would probably get better advice in the relationships forum op.

    I don't think so... http://i.imgur.com/wzNwfeU.jpg


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,188 ✭✭✭DoYouEvenLift


    Go no contact for life


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,154 ✭✭✭silverfeather


    Dont contact her again unless she contacts you first.
    It doesn't sound like she wants to. Move on op. She is not on OP your last message was such that you felt the need to apologize. Don't contact her.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,987 ✭✭✭Tilly


    wolf99 wrote: »
    Darn it I did look for a better forum on boards but I cant find anything since boards was restructured a while back :rolleyes:
    You'd get the same replies in there tbh.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 127 ✭✭Buzz Meeks


    Wolf99 do you know how to pick locks?


  • Registered Users Posts: 307 ✭✭wolf99


    engol wrote: »
    Off topic but fwiw, getting flowers when it's not an occasion as such is hugely better than getting flowers when it is. Like, by a million miles.

    I thought everyone knew this??

    this was the basis I was working off. :o


  • Registered Users Posts: 643 ✭✭✭scdublin


    She'd definitely find that odd. If she hasn't been in touch after several texts I'd just leave it....don't even bother with the apology.


  • Registered Users Posts: 43,017 ✭✭✭✭SEPT 23 1989


    send her a wreath instead of a bunch of flowers


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,154 ✭✭✭silverfeather


    scdublin wrote: »
    She'd definitely find that odd. If she hasn't been in touch after several texts I'd just leave it....don't even bother with the apology.
    Actually sometimes leaving someone alone IS an apology.


  • Registered Users Posts: 137 ✭✭engol


    wolf99 wrote: »
    this was the basis I was working off. :o

    Yeah but I said "off topic". My reference to sending flowers is not for you. Repeat, not for you. You have to leave this woman alone. :o


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 12,318 ✭✭✭✭Menas


    wolf99 wrote: »
    Darn it I did look for a better forum on boards but I cant find anything since boards was restructured a while back :rolleyes:

    Ach, you are grand here as long as you can handle the jibing!


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,480 ✭✭✭Chancer3001


    Leave her alone.

    Chances are if you leave her off shell have a much higher chance of coming back to you


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 3,188 ✭✭✭DoYouEvenLift


    Leave her alone.

    Chances are if you leave her off shell have a much higher chance of coming back to you


    http://static.celebuzz.com/uploads/2013/08/14/jennifer-lawrence-10.gif


  • Registered Users Posts: 307 ✭✭wolf99


    engol wrote: »
    Yeah but I said "off topic". My reference to sending flowers is not for you. Repeat, not for you. You have to leave this woman alone. :o

    Ha ha, yeah, I did note the FWIW, just meant that was where I was coming from. I am not a psycho. Repeat, NOT a psycho! :p


  • Registered Users Posts: 17,736 ✭✭✭✭kylith


    engol wrote: »
    Off topic but fwiw, getting flowers when it's not an occasion as such is hugely better than getting flowers when it is. Like, by a million miles.

    I thought everyone knew this??
    Flowers for no reason > flowers because of obligation

    BUT

    flowers sent to your house for no reason when the sender isn't supposed to know your address = contacting the gardai, moving house, and possibly changing your identity.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 34,809 ✭✭✭✭smash


    Send her a bunch of these.


  • Registered Users Posts: 137 ✭✭engol


    wolf99 wrote: »
    Ha ha, yeah, I did note the FWIW, just meant that was where I was coming from. I am not a psycho. Repeat, NOT a psycho! :p

    Yeah I think I'm just going to repeat DoYouEvenLift's meme at you now.

    :P


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 518 ✭✭✭FluffyAngel


    wolf99 wrote: »
    Darn it I did look for a better forum on boards but I cant find anything since boards was restructured a while back :rolleyes:

    Use it for what it is , a huge lesson on the difference of communication between the genders

    Next time try not to think with your head and listen to your heart


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