Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

Kaching · 09-02-2013 6:00pm

Captain Graphite wrote: »

I've been in counselling for the past three weeks. My counsellor is a really nice woman, who listens to everything I have to say....but thus far she hasn't really given me any suggestions as to how I can improve my life or my way of thinking. She seems like an intelligent, perfectly competent person.....so I can only assume that I'm the problem; I'm so broken and stubborn and set in my self-defeating ways that she can't actually help me at all. Pretty annoying, depressing thought.....especially considering we only have six weeks worth of sessions and we're already halfway through it. I know she gets paid to deal with stuff like this but I can't help but feel like I'm just wasting her time and that she'd be much better off listening to someone she could actually help and give solid advice to.

Im exactly the same !
I feel like Ive wasted her time and that I continue to do so and that who am I to complain when there are worse things that could be going on
Its a common thing with depression to feel you're not worth anyones time. Hang in there and if you need I'm here drop us a line if ya want

Lightbulb Sun · 09-02-2013 6:20pm

Captain Graphite wrote: »

I've been in counselling for the past three weeks. My counsellor is a really nice woman, who listens to everything I have to say....but thus far she hasn't really given me any suggestions as to how I can improve my life or my way of thinking. She seems like an intelligent, perfectly competent person.....so I can only assume that I'm the problem; I'm so broken and stubborn and set in my self-defeating ways that she can't actually help me at all. Pretty annoying, depressing thought.....especially considering we only have six weeks worth of sessions and we're already halfway through it. I know she gets paid to deal with stuff like this but I can't help but feel like I'm just wasting her time and that she'd be much better off listening to someone she could actually help and give solid advice to.

You get out what you put in. You and her are the only one that knows what goes on in the meetings so I don't know how good her plans for you are but from my experience therapists can only help those who want to be helped.

I think this is important for anyone reading this thread. To improve your mental health it's about the effort that you make, professionals can help but it's about getting out there and putting the advice into positive action.

Kaching · 09-02-2013 6:45pm

Lightbulb Sun wrote: »

To improve your mental health it's about the effort that you make, professionals can help but it's about getting out there and putting the advice into positive action.

x1,000 agree

Captain Graphite · 09-02-2013 9:19pm

Lightbulb Sun wrote: »

You get out what you put in. You and her are the only one that knows what goes on in the meetings so I don't know how good her plans for you are but from my experience therapists can only help those who want to be helped.

I think this is important for anyone reading this thread. To improve your mental health it's about the effort that you make, professionals can help but it's about getting out there and putting the advice into positive action.

I know what you're saying but when you genuinely make an effort and things still don't work it's horribly dispiriting. Plus if I knew how to fix these things on my own I wouldn't be in counselling in the first place.

I do want to get better, I just don't know how.

Ladyblackadder · 09-02-2013 9:29pm

Captain Graphite wrote: »

I know what you're saying but when you genuinely make an effort and things still don't work it's horribly dispiriting. Plus if I knew how to fix these things on my own I wouldn't be in counselling in the first place.

I do want to get better, I just don't know how.

It can take a good while to get better and it can take a counsellor quite a while to figure out what help someone needs. Sometimes, just talking about things can help make them clearer and you might come up with your own solutions because of the counselling. Six weeks sounds like a very short time to deal with issues that could have taken years to come to the surface though. There is hardly even enough time to feel comfortable enough to reveal yourself to even a good counsellor.

Captain Graphite · 09-02-2013 10:28pm

Yeah six weeks isn't very long but it's a university counselling service so I guess they only have enough resources to offer students that many sessions each.

Ladyblackadder · 09-02-2013 10:58pm

Captain Graphite wrote: »

Yeah six weeks isn't very long but it's a university counselling service so I guess they only have enough resources to offer students that many sessions each.

Maybe you could ask if the counsellor could recommend you for further therapy when the six weeks are up. There should be local services that you could utilise for free or for a nominal fee because you are a student. It will probably mean you will have to start telling your story all over again but that might be good as well. I would recommend anyone who uses a humanistic, person centred approach but it has to be someone you feel comfortable with yourself. So it might be good if you consider these six weeks as a starter course to your getting better. I believe myself that it's better to think of ourselves as works in progress forever, always with the potential to change and improve with the more sensitive of us needing a bit of help along the way.

Gockers · 09-02-2013 11:00pm

Hi all,

So glad to have found this thread

I have been dealing with depression and anxiety for 5 years at least. Anyone who doesn't know about my illness wouldn't have a clue that i have it. I am an attractive, active, social, happy go lucky person who works hard and does well at her job. Maybe the only thing people would see is the fact I can get stressed when under pressure (pretty common for most people in the modern day workplace). In a way our attitude to illness is still a bit Victorian - if you can't see the problem, there is nothing wrong. Even my parents, who have been so amazing to me through my sickness, don't understand that when my worst/obvious symptoms subside, it doesn't mean that I am all better again. But, talk to someone if you haven't already. I got diagnosed first and then told my parents and a few close friends. Whatever works for you but DO NOT KEEP IT TO YOURSELF!

I am an open person but have always opted to not tell my employer about my illness (GPs, Counsellors, Psychiatrists and Mental Health Professionals have discouraged me to do so). It's tough because we live in a day and age whereby we are told that depression is as serious as a broken bone yet on the other hand, employers do not want to know. i have an amazing GP who told me he is there to protect me. So for example, if I am up all night because of anxiety or I am too tearful to go to work etc., he will deal with it for me. I haven't had to use this yet but it makes me feel safe/protected knowing that option is there.

Everyone is different, what has empowered me is reading up as much as I know about depression/anxiety and always keeping an open mind about treatments. The other thing I learned is to pick a Counsellor/ Psychiatrist that works for you individually. Make sure your Counsellor has all the relevant qualifications (here is a good place to look - http://www.irish-counselling.ie/). This also applies to Psychiatrists, pick one you feel comfortable around and one who is approachable. My friend's Mom was bereft when her Psychiatrist retired because he had been so good to her for 30 years. Whereas the one I had wasn't available for months on end so there was essentially no relationship there. That may work for someone else but not me. Recently i had a bad episode for about 4 months because I believed I made a full recovery and came off my meds, my legend of a GP who I have recently discovered has referred me to the Deans Clinic (http://www.stpatrickshosp.ie/dean-clinics-community-mental-health) which I am really excited about. They take a multi-pronged approach I believe and treat you as a blank page and spend a fair bit of time with you assessing you from scratch.

I have to say what got me out of my dark hole of last year (apart from going back on meds) was a 3 day course called the Lightening Process I did back in October (http://www.truenorthpractice.ie). It's basically all about learning how the brain works and how it picks up habits (good or bad) causing people to get the same symptoms over and over again. It teaches you how to break the bad patterns. Before I did the course, I had become scared of everything, could barely keep afloat in work and was having panic attacks the whole time. Since doing the course, none of those things have happened to me. Don't get me wrong, I still get stress and low moods, but few and far between (it takes the brain a while to get out of these learned patterns). My life is back again and when the going gets tough, I can do something about it!

I have always wanted to speak out about my illness and help people but have yet to find the way I would like to do that but this for now, is it. And my first time too so be nice people

Here are some links I find really helpful:
http://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au - An Australian Orginisation on Depression/anxiety related disorders
http://www.channel4.com/programmes/worlds-maddest-job-interview - really interesting documentary done last year by ch4. Watch it if you can.
http://www.lightningprocess.com - more info on the lightening process
http://www.ted.com/talks/jill_bolte_taylor_s_powerful_stroke_of_insight.html - A talk on how the brain works, this one made me cry!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXy__kBVq1M - another talk but more on re training your brain, the principal the lightening process abides by. In wider studies, it is called Positive Psychology.

RubyXI · 10-02-2013 7:39pm

Hi Guys
Here's the list of prescribed books used in England as part of their Bibliotherapy programme.

How To Stop Worrying by Frank Tallis

The Worry Cure: Stop Worrying and Start Living by Robert L. Leahy

Feel The Fear And Do It Anyway by Susan Jeffers

Overcoming Binge Eating by Christopher G. Fairburn

Getter Better Bit(e) by Bit(e): A Survival Kit for Sufferers of Bulimia Nervosa and and Binge Eating Disorders by Ulrike Schmidt and Janet Treasure

Overcoming Bulimia Nervosa and Binge Eating by Peter J. Cooper

Chronic Fatigue Syndrome by Frankie Campling and Michael Sharpe

Overcoming Chronic Fatigue by Mary Burgess and Trudie Chalder

Overcoming Chronic Pain by Frances Cole, Catherine Carus, Hazel Howden-Leach and Helen MacDonald

Overcoming Depression and Low Mood: A Five Areas Approach by Chris Williams

Mind Over Mood: Change How You Feel by Changing The Way You Think by Dennis Greenberger and Christine Padesky

Overcoming Depression: A Guide To Recovery with a Complete Self-Help Programme by Paul Gilbert

Overcoming Health Anxiety by Rob Wilson and David Veale

Introduction to Coping with Health Anxiety by Brenda Hogan and Charles Young

Overcoming Obsessive Compulsive Disorder by David Veale and Rob Wilson

Understanding Obsessions and Compulsions by Frank Tallis

Break Free from OCD: Overcoming Obsessive Compulsive Disorder with CBT by Fiona Challacombe and Victoria Oldfield

Overcoming Panic and Agoraphobia by Derrick Silove and Vijaya Manicavasagar

Panic Attacks: What They Are, Why They Happen and What You Can Do About Them by Christine Ingham

An Introduction to Coping with Phobias by Brenda Hogan

Overcoming Relationship Problems by Michael Crowe

Overcoming Low Self-Esteem by Melanie Fennell

Overcoming Social Anxiety and Shyness and Gillian Butler

Overcoming Insomnia and Sleep Problems by Colin A. Espie

The Relaxation and Stress Reduction Workbook by Martha Davis

Manage your Stress for a Healthier Life by Terry Looker and Olga Gregson

Overcoming Anger and Irritability by William Davies

Overcoming Anxiety, a Self-Help Guide by Helen Kennerley

Overcoming Anxiety, Stress and Panic: A Five Areas Approach by Chris Williams

The Feeling Good Handbook by Davis D. Burns

See more Here
http://todayfm.com/Shows/Weekdays/Ray-DArcy-Show/Blog/13-02-07/Mood_Boosting_Books.aspx?ReturnURL=%2fShows%2fWeekdays%2fRay-DArcy-Show%2fBlog.aspx

Tom_Cruise · 10-02-2013 10:15pm

This is my first time posting here.

I have been feeling really down in myself for a long time now and it doesnt seem to be getting any better. I don't know what to do about it or even where to start.

Maybe it will go away on its own in time?

MrMischief · 11-02-2013 12:05am

1dave123 wrote: »

Hi MrMichief

I read your note with interest and thanks for posting. If it is any consolation u r not alone. I have identical symptoms and I look forward to hearing how you get on with your therapist. Perhaps I can pick up a tip or two.

One thing I have found useful in recent weeks is a magnesium supplement. I certainly feel more relaxed and less prone to panic. The impact was noticeable within a couple of days of taking and whilst it may be a placebo effect I don't think so. I say this because I have been trying lots of things (iron, tyrosine, SSRIs etc) none of which had any beneficial effects.

It may not work for anyone else but the magnesium supplement seems to have helped me. To date I have been taking magnesium oxide which actually is the least absorbable form of magnesium. This week I am expecting to receive a supply of magnesium glycinate (ordered it on internet). This is a much more absorbable version of magnesium so much more potent - it will be interesting to see if the benefits continue.

Hi Dave - yeah i'm trying to keep an open mind wih regards to the counselling and i'll be sure to pass on some tips if i have any luck. Looking back i've probably had this for more than 10 years and am finally seeking assistance.

MrMischief · 11-02-2013 12:10am

Gockers wrote: »

Hi all,

So glad to have found this thread

I have been dealing with depression and anxiety for 5 years at least. Anyone who doesn't know about my illness wouldn't have a clue that i have it. I am an attractive, active, social, happy go lucky person who works hard and does well at her job. Maybe the only thing people would see is the fact I can get stressed when under pressure (pretty common for most people in the modern day workplace). In a way our attitude to illness is still a bit Victorian - if you can't see the problem, there is nothing wrong. Even my parents, who have been so amazing to me through my sickness, don't understand that when my worst/obvious symptoms subside, it doesn't mean that I am all better again. But, talk to someone if you haven't already. I got diagnosed first and then told my parents and a few close friends. Whatever works for you but DO NOT KEEP IT TO YOURSELF!

I am an open person but have always opted to not tell my employer about my illness (GPs, Counsellors, Psychiatrists and Mental Health Professionals have discouraged me to do so). It's tough because we live in a day and age whereby we are told that depression is as serious as a broken bone yet on the other hand, employers do not want to know. i have an amazing GP who told me he is there to protect me. So for example, if I am up all night because of anxiety or I am too tearful to go to work etc., he will deal with it for me. I haven't had to use this yet but it makes me feel safe/protected knowing that option is there.

Everyone is different, what has empowered me is reading up as much as I know about depression/anxiety and always keeping an open mind about treatments. The other thing I learned is to pick a Counsellor/ Psychiatrist that works for you individually. Make sure your Counsellor has all the relevant qualifications (here is a good place to look - http://www.irish-counselling.ie/). This also applies to Psychiatrists, pick one you feel comfortable around and one who is approachable. My friend's Mom was bereft when her Psychiatrist retired because he had been so good to her for 30 years. Whereas the one I had wasn't available for months on end so there was essentially no relationship there. That may work for someone else but not me. Recently i had a bad episode for about 4 months because I believed I made a full recovery and came off my meds, my legend of a GP who I have recently discovered has referred me to the Deans Clinic (http://www.stpatrickshosp.ie/dean-clinics-community-mental-health) which I am really excited about. They take a multi-pronged approach I believe and treat you as a blank page and spend a fair bit of time with you assessing you from scratch.

I have to say what got me out of my dark hole of last year (apart from going back on meds) was a 3 day course called the Lightening Process I did back in October (http://www.truenorthpractice.ie). It's basically all about learning how the brain works and how it picks up habits (good or bad) causing people to get the same symptoms over and over again. It teaches you how to break the bad patterns. Before I did the course, I had become scared of everything, could barely keep afloat in work and was having panic attacks the whole time. Since doing the course, none of those things have happened to me. Don't get me wrong, I still get stress and low moods, but few and far between (it takes the brain a while to get out of these learned patterns). My life is back again and when the going gets tough, I can do something about it!

I have always wanted to speak out about my illness and help people but have yet to find the way I would like to do that but this for now, is it. And my first time too so be nice people

Here are some links I find really helpful:
http://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au - An Australian Orginisation on Depression/anxiety related disorders
http://www.channel4.com/programmes/worlds-maddest-job-interview - really interesting documentary done last year by ch4. Watch it if you can.
http://www.lightningprocess.com - more info on the lightening process
http://www.ted.com/talks/jill_bolte_taylor_s_powerful_stroke_of_insight.html - A talk on how the brain works, this one made me cry!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GXy__kBVq1M - another talk but more on re training your brain, the principal the lightening process abides by. In wider studies, it is called Positive Psychology.

Good post.

The only thing i have done differently is that I actually told my boss in work who is also a friend i can trust so i suppose that helps! It stops with him and nobody else will know unless i feel like telling them. I think you're right being open about it and thats why i dont have the problem telling work and i know i wont be treated or viewed any differently. Best of luck anyway!

loveisdivine · 11-02-2013 10:41am

I seem to be having some issues with anxiety. In November last year I had a strong migraine and the visual symptoms have been constant since then. Its been really upsetting me, having constant visual disturbances. It now seems to be causing me some health anxiety.
Mainly I worry that my vision problems will never get better or I will wake up one day and they will be worse.

I am now seeing a specialist at the migraine clinic and I am on Propranolol for the migraines and I'm starting to worry a little about side effects. Mainly the possibility of sleep disturbances. I'm a really good sleeper but I know from previous experience that if I start to sleep really badly it effects my mood greatly.

I want to do something to address the anxiety but I'm not sure what. It isnt yet affecting my work or relationship and I still feel a happy person. However, I suffered mental health issues in the past and I know what can happen if you ignore things.

I've purchased the Overcoming Worry book and have just started reading it.

Is there anything else I can do? I know my worries are irrational and all my "what if's" are a thought process that needs to be halted. But I dont want to make things worse either. I just really dont want to end up with serious mental health issues again. I have overcome them once and was doing great for years, then this persistent aura migraine has triggered the anxiety again

I seem to get little bouts of anxiety in the early evening. I'll suddenly become a bit panicked and get butterflies. Then it passes after about 30 minutes.

RubyXI · 11-02-2013 12:39pm

Tom_Cruise wrote: »

This is my first time posting here.

I have been feeling really down in myself for a long time now and it doesnt seem to be getting any better. I don't know what to do about it or even where to start.

Maybe it will go away on its own in time?

Hi. Welcome. If you have been feeling down for a very long time, it might be best that you talk to your GP. There's no point suffering unnecessarily. Even if it may go away on it's own eventually, you will be miserable while you wait. And it's likely you will need a bit of help to get rid of it. Doctors see it every day

Kaching · 11-02-2013 8:12pm

beginning to feel like a stranger round here

cloud493 · 11-02-2013 8:17pm

What's up?

Kaching · 11-02-2013 8:53pm

cloud493 wrote: »

What's up?

how long have you got?

cloud493 · 11-02-2013 9:11pm

Kaching wrote: »

how long have you got?

Long as you need

Kaching · 11-02-2013 9:30pm

cloud493 wrote: »

Long as you need

Don't say that you wont get to sleep tonight

neemish · 11-02-2013 9:56pm

Hey Kaching and Cloud! How are you keeping... Know what you mean about feeling like a stranger.

Tired at the moment, well not tired drained. It doesn't matter how much i sleep, i never feel rested

Kaching · 11-02-2013 10:04pm

neemish wrote: »

Hey Kaching and Cloud! How are you keeping... Know what you mean about feeling like a stranger.

Tired at the moment, well not tired drained. It doesn't matter how much i sleep, i never feel rested

Know what you mean . Not great tbh

neemish · 11-02-2013 10:39pm

Kaching wrote: »

Know what you mean . Not great tbh

Its one foot in front of the other time. My appetite is gone. Everyone thinks i'm fine but.... I call it the x-factor and its just not there

Hersheys · 11-02-2013 10:41pm

Missed you Neemish, how you doing?

neemish · 11-02-2013 10:47pm

Hersheys wrote: »

Missed you Neemish, how you doing?

Hanging in there. Good days but feel like i'm dragging myself around. Lots of migraines and not feeling well. Flashbacks are taking over my life. Trying to get them back under control.

How are you doin?

Hersheys · 11-02-2013 10:55pm

neemish wrote: »

Hanging in there. Good days but feel like i'm dragging myself around. Lots of migraines and not feeling well. Flashbacks are taking over my life. Trying to get them back under control.

How are you doin?

Bit of a struggle the past while, bad thoughts and a bit of self harm. My abuser is pretty much back in my life & I can't avoid it. Doc has been amazing but genuinely feel like I can't get thru the next few weeks.

neemish · 11-02-2013 11:09pm

Hersheys wrote: »

Bit of a struggle the past while, bad thoughts and a bit of self harm. My abuser is pretty much back in my life & I can't avoid it. Doc has been amazing but genuinely feel like I can't get thru the next few weeks.

Hugs

Kaching · 11-02-2013 11:16pm

neemish wrote: »

Hugs

We need a meetup . Thing is most of ye are probably from Dublin .hmmm

neemish · 11-02-2013 11:21pm

Kaching wrote: »

We need a meetup . Thing is most of ye are probably from Dublin .hmmm

Def. i'm in dublin. What abt other people? Even mention north/south etc

loveisdivine · 12-02-2013 11:41am

Anxiety was better yesterday. Didnt have any panicky feelings at all. I think its cos I'm generally busier during the week. Its at weekedsn when I've less to do that they creep up.

Read some more of my Overcoming Worry book last night. Set some goals. Just need to work out how to achieve them now.

I'm just so scared of becoming depressed. How do you know if you're depressed?

titan18 · 12-02-2013 5:56pm

These last few days have been awful. Was hoping all this crap was gone away, but it just feels like before all over again

Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

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