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The Online Dating Thread Part II **Mod Warning** Read First Post/or Post 7389

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    #122
    stargazer 68
    Registered Users Posts: 5,075 ✭✭✭stargazer 68


    Misticles wrote: »
    Could he have had a dodgy tummy?

    Did he make many loo trips during the date?

    Bit bad if he left you looking for a taxi on your own! :o

    Lol nope that was the first visit. I just thought it was a bit bad to let me walk down O'Connell Street to get a taxi by myself too!! Mentioned it to one of the girls in work today and so did she so its not just my paranoia!


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    #123
    Misticles
    Registered Users Posts: 13,746 ✭✭✭✭Misticles


    Dovies wrote: »
    Lol nope that was the first visit. I just thought it was a bit bad to let me walk down O'Connell Street to get a taxi by myself too!! Mentioned it to one of the girls in work today and so did she so its not just my paranoia!


    ye I would find it quite rude not to make sure you were safe in a taxi.

    Any text to see if you got home?


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    #124
    stargazer 68
    Registered Users Posts: 5,075 ✭✭✭stargazer 68


    Misticles wrote: »
    ye I would find it quite rude not to make sure you were safe in a taxi.

    Any text to see if you got home?

    Nope. And normally I would text when I got home to say I was home, thanks etc but didnt bother last night. Sod him! lol


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    #125
    Misticles
    Registered Users Posts: 13,746 ✭✭✭✭Misticles


    Dovies wrote: »
    Nope. And normally I would text when I got home to say I was home, thanks etc but didnt bother last night. Sod him! lol

    too right!

    You don't need a man who dosnt have the basic manners to ensure a woman gets home safely!


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    #126
    Dravokivich
    Moderators, Category Moderators, Music Moderators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 22,360 CMod ✭✭✭✭Dravokivich


    Misticles wrote: »
    too right!

    You don't need a man who dosnt have the basic manners to ensure a woman gets home safely!

    No independant women here wha!?

    :pac:

    I kid, does seem a bit odd to me too. Maybe he's unaware of the affect is actions have caused.


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    #127
    That_Guy
    Registered Users Posts: 51,342 ✭✭✭✭That_Guy


    Galvasean wrote: »
    Once again my narcissistic tendencies have betrayed me... I'm told.

    Sorry to hear this pal.

    As Otis has mentioned, just enjoy the Christmas period. No need to rush back into it really.


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    #128
    duke916
    Registered Users Posts: 113 ✭✭duke916


    Dovies wrote: »
    Had a date last night - not too bad (or so I thought) - having a good chat and a laugh etc - seemed very attentive. Then we were leaving we got up, put the coats on and headed to the door. He then said, Im going to use the loo so it was nice to meet you, chat again and off he went! I had to leave the pub and head off to find a taxi by myself!

    Now is that weird or is it just me?? :confused:

    tell ya one thing, nothing surprises about net dating. anything that can happen, will happen and more. ya think thats bad, was chatting to a girl from the north for a week. everything was goin 'unusually' great. calling each other from work during the day and even chatting on skype at night. got a few days off, so instead of her coming to dublin, i did the mannerly thing and drove to newry to meet up. within 10 mins of meeting her i was told she didnt like me. jaw dropped and thought wtf?! was quite deflated after that i have to say as I was driving home on the motorway thinking 'right, never again', but nothing you can do but to just get on with it and laugh it off. there is weird and there is downright disrespectful. fair enough, if she didnt like what she saw (despite numerous pics exchanged and video chat on skype) then fair enough, but could have given a chance, got on with the date, enjoyed the day and make a decision later. kinda same principle as your date. ok you might have not been to your tastes, but at least be a gentleman and walked you to your taxi to make sure you were safe regardless of his feelings towards you.


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    #129
    G-Money
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,200 ✭✭✭G-Money


    It's been a while since I've been on a date but I don't know if I always walked them to a taxi or whatever. I guess it depends on how the date went and the general vibe or whatever. If it didn't go that well, I'd want to be hightailing it as quickly as possible. But then sometimes I've met girls in shopping centres and they've driven there or something so we often just go our seperate ways when we leave the coffee place or something.

    I'd say though if it was late at night or something, I'd probably walk her close to a taxi rank or something. I might not hang around though if the date didn't go well or worse, if one of us is interested and the other isn't.


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    #130
    GrumPy
    Registered Users Posts: 6,557 ✭✭✭GrumPy


    Joined OKCupid about three weeks ago out of curiosity and mainly my forever alone status. :P

    Exchanged a few messages but nothing really developing.
    Joined POF on Tuesday, absolutely hated the interface (I'm a comp science graduate, and it just ****s with my brain how horribly designed it is) so I decided to delete my account after only a half hour of creeping. :o

    It wouldn't let me do it for 24 hours (areyou****ingkiddingme.jpg) but I've been in touch with more chicks in the last few days then I ever have on OKCupid? :confused:

    Anyway, needless to say, I'm not gonna delete the account :P

    I'll put my nerdy snobbery aside and deal with how nasty the site looks and see what happens :pac:

    I wonder why the better uptake on POF though? (My profile is all copypasta)


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    #131
    stupidusername
    Closed Accounts Posts: 14,762 ✭✭✭✭stupidusername


    I don't really see what the big deal is about the guy not walking her to the taxi rank. :confused: as Gmoney said, it depends on the way things went also. maybe he wasn't feeling well, and didn't want her to stick around for him to come out. that'd make sense to me. wouldn't see it as a deal breaker myself.


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    #132
    zuroph
    Registered Users Posts: 11,097 ✭✭✭✭zuroph


    that or he had a mate somewhere else in the pub and didnt want to leave for fear he didnt get back in.


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    #133
    Otis Driftwood
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,925 ✭✭✭Otis Driftwood


    Even if he wasn't feeling it,it's common bloody courtesy to walk your date to the bus/taxi etc.


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    #134
    Seisen
    Registered Users Posts: 8 ✭Seisen


    In my opinion you can take it to mean BOTH! (a) he isn't really interested and (b) he's keeping his options open, in case nothing better turns up. I gave up on internet dating sites when my friends and I started to compare notes - we found (1) men were on up to 10 dating sites at the same time (2) were texting, emailing and meeting numerous women in the course of a week (3) were not interested in letting the friendship/relationship evolve, it was instant gratification or nothing!
    Sorry to sound cynical but that has been our experience.


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    #135
    G-Money
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,200 ✭✭✭G-Money


    Seisen wrote: »
    In my opinion you can take it to mean BOTH! (a) he isn't really interested and (b) he's keeping his options open, in case nothing better turns up. I gave up on internet dating sites when my friends and I started to compare notes - we found (1) men were on up to 10 dating sites at the same time (2) were texting, emailing and meeting numerous women in the course of a week (3) were not interested in letting the friendship/relationship evolve, it was instant gratification or nothing!
    Sorry to sound cynical but that has been our experience.

    In fairness, I'm sure quite a few of the girls I was talking to were emailing other guys. I always made a point of not putting all my eggs in one basket when it came to contacting girls on internet dating sites. I had no desire to be some sort of "player" or whatever, but I knew I simply couldn't rely on any particular girl responding and even if she did, the conversation not tailing off after a few mails or her not contacting/dating other guys. I sort of learnt that the tough way a few years ago when there was a girl I liked and was chatting to her on a dating site a few days and she told me about some date she was going on. I felt a bit put out by it but at the same time, she was single so she could do whatever she wanted. Since then, I made sure not to fall into the same trap.

    If it got as far as organising to meet up, I'd sort of stop contacting other girls and wouldn't organise to meet up with anyone else until I'd seen how things went with the girl in question.


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    #136
    murhatchi
    Registered Users Posts: 39 ✭murhatchi


    Otis Driftwood wrote: »
    Even if he wasn't feeling it,it's common bloody courtesy to walk your date to the bus/taxi etc.

    Eh? I wouldnt let any girl walk herself to a taxi/bus at night be it friend, sister, date or whatever. Maybe Im just old:confused:


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    #137
    Galvasean
    Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    That_Guy wrote: »
    Sorry to hear this pal.
    zuroph wrote: »
    sorry to hear that Galva, very surprised too :(
    Dovies wrote: »
    Aw Galv thats a shame. Welcome back to the fold though x
    gatecrash wrote: »
    Damn dude. Sorry to hear this.
    MudSkipper wrote: »
    that shucks :(
    Otis Driftwood wrote: »
    Ballbag.

    Feck it man,these things happen.
    Larianne wrote: »
    :(

    Genuinely saddened to see this.

    Onwards and upwards man.

    Sentiment appreciated guys.
    However, in hindsight I'm bloody glad I'm out. Looking back over the relationship I wasn't being treated very well at all (case in point: I was sick for practically the whole month of November and she never came to visit me once, or offered for that matter. She did ring me a couple of times, once to argue with me over something irrelevant FFS :rolleyes:) but I was too blind to see it at the time. I was actually kind of miserable for the last couple of weeks but the weight of the world feels lifted from my shoulders now.

    *notices that guy is still here*

    How you don'...........? :pac:

    PS: bumped into that ex ex girlfriend of mine yesterday. A civil conversation ensued. three's a charm eh????????????????? :o


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    #138
    G-Money
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,200 ✭✭✭G-Money


    Kya1976 wrote: »
    Nothing to do with being old. As a girl I really appreciate small gestures like that.

    I was on a date last night, I've seen him a few times now. We both started out saying we want something casual, I just hope I have the right to change my mind about that:p

    I find him a bit hard to read though, last night he brought me a gift, a DVD. He just said he knew I'd love it so he got if for me. Such a sweet thing to do:)

    If you are going to change your mind about what you want, he needs to as well otherwise you will be heading for a whole world of hurt!


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    #139
    G-Money
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,200 ✭✭✭G-Money


    I wouldn't buy a gift for a girl unless I liked her and wanted something to happen.

    But then I'm not a fan of casual relationships and I avoid them. I don't like this sort of "having to half like someone" mentality while they can go off with someone else if they want. It's either all or nothing for me. So I don't know if I can give you a knowledgeable answer :)


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    #140
    Otis Driftwood
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,925 ✭✭✭Otis Driftwood


    murhatchi wrote: »
    Eh? I wouldnt let any girl walk herself to a taxi/bus at night be it friend, sister, date or whatever. Maybe Im just old:confused:

    Ehhh Im not sure why you quoted me mate,I presume you misread my last post,that was the point I was making.

    Dovies had said that her date basically left her standing,I said it was common courtesy to walk your date to a cab or whatever,even if you weren't interested.


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    #141
    Larianne
    Registered Users Posts: 35,954 ✭✭✭✭Larianne


    I guess the dude wasn't that interested and didn't want the awkwardness of having to say goodbye at a taxi or whatever. In his mind it was probably a case of "ah, not gonna see her again so it doesn't matter."

    :cool:


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    #142
    Otis Driftwood
    Closed Accounts Posts: 9,925 ✭✭✭Otis Driftwood


    I know that feeling,believe me,but still,where are the manners gone!


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    #143
    Seisen
    Registered Users Posts: 8 ✭Seisen


    I'm sure it works both ways G-Money, as your own experience shows but I still think there is a gender difference in how men and women use internet dating sites. Men in their 40s and 50s have no issue with looking for a woman 20-30 years younger and men in their 20s often specifically look for women in their 40s and 50s! I always replied to emails that looked like there was some effort put into them, rather than a generic version that was mass-posted! Even if it was only to say thanks but no thanks. This included replying to the aforementioned 20 year olds to tell them I had a son their age! Even though I don't use these sites anymore, I could write a thesis on my previous experience!


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    #144
    Larianne
    Registered Users Posts: 35,954 ✭✭✭✭Larianne


    Otis Driftwood wrote: »
    I know that feeling,believe me,but still,where are the manners gone!

    I'm not saying it was the right way to end the date mind! Even just to offer is suffice!


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    #145
    The Big Red Button
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,390 ✭✭✭The Big Red Button


    Ah even if I went for drinks with male friends, they'd still make sure I got to a taxi OK! I don't care if it's sexist to say it, but it's just good manners, and basic decentness (is that a word? I'm very hungover! :o )


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    #146
    murhatchi
    Registered Users Posts: 39 ✭murhatchi


    Otis Driftwood wrote: »
    murhatchi wrote: »
    Eh? I wouldnt let any girl walk herself to a taxi/bus at night be it friend, sister, date or whatever. Maybe Im just old:confused:

    Ehhh Im not sure why you quoted me mate,I presume you misread my last post,that was the point I was making.

    Dovies had said that her date basically left her standing,I said it was common courtesy to walk your date to a cab or whatever,even if you weren't interested.

    Sorry. Just quoted you as several posts since . Totally agreeing with you. Out of habit of posting stuff .


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    #147
    Newsite
    Closed Accounts Posts: 820 ✭✭✭Newsite


    What kind of hit rate on messages you send do ye get on POF lads? In terms of replies?! Last time I gave it a bash I got almost no replies from girls I fancied, even though I am a respectably good looking lad - did get a few from girls I didn't fancy though!


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    #148
    G-Money
    Closed Accounts Posts: 8,200 ✭✭✭G-Money


    Newsite wrote: »
    What kind of hit rate on messages you send do ye get on POF lads? In terms of replies?! Last time I gave it a bash I got almost no replies from girls I fancied, even though I am a respectably good looking lad - did get a few from girls I didn't fancy though!

    Last time I was on POF I think I sent out about 20 mails and got about 1 or 2 replies.

    I then had 1 or 2 girls initiate contact with me who I didn't really fancy. The usual "hi, how r u?" and nothing else.


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    #149
    den87
    Registered Users Posts: 531 ✭✭✭den87


    Quick question for ye guys and gals- How long were ye on one of the dating sites before ye went on yer first date??


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    #150
    Lost Accent
    Closed Accounts Posts: 24 ✭Lost Accent


    I started about 6-7 weeks ago and going on my first date this weekend.


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    #151
    wobblyknees
    Registered Users Posts: 1,435 ✭✭✭wobblyknees


    I've been a member of OKC and POF for a few weeks and haven't really had much luck. Was contacted by someone I thought was really interesting, pretty and actually laughed out loud at some of the stuff she said but think I maybe left it too long with the whole chat online thing. I really do not know how to do this! When she asked me did I have any plans for the weekend, I presumed she was being polite. Perhaps she was or maybe I'm an idiot and should have asked her would she like to meet. Oh well.


This discussion has been closed.
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