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Separating from Husband

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  • 12-05-2015 7:43am
    #1
    LegacyUser
    Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭


    Hi my husband and I live in the same house but we have no physical contact. I need out of our marriage and don't love him. He does not seem to get the fact that I want a separating. He comes in and pretend nothing wrong follows me if I leave the house to visit friends/ family. It is emotionally draining the life out of me please can anyone offer help and advice me. I've no idea what to do king regards


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    #2
    Neyite
    Administrators, Politics Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 25,947 Admin ✭✭✭✭✭Neyite


    Mod:
    Hi OP, I've separated your post out into a thread just for yourself. I've also moved it to Separation and Divorce where you might get better support and advice.


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    #3
    lostsoul01
    Registered Users Posts: 31 ✭lostsoul01


    Have you told your husband exactly how you feel? Sounds strange if you have done and he still thinks everything is okay maybe you need to sit down and have a proper chat with him. He might think you weren't serious or he could simply just be in denial, either way you're going to have to speak to him again and explain how you feel. You didn't mention children, do you have any? If so have you thought how all of this will effect them? I have been through similar situation so I wish you a luck. Stay strong and positive you will get through this Xx


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    #4
    tomirs
    Registered Users Posts: 107 ✭✭tomirs


    Move all your stuff to another room and put a lock on the door for your privacy ...yes its aloud ... ... make out a list off bills that need paying ..stating who pays what and when stick it up on the fridge ...Do your own shopping ..... Do your own and the children's laundry ,,,not his ... cook your own dinners... have your own social life ....tell him he is baby sitting such and such and night ect or book a sitter and go out for you time ...Make life as if ye are sharing a flat ...stop doing what you have been doing ,... minding him and tending to his needs .... you are separated ... so do your own thing and if he wont move out ...work towards finding your own place


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    #5
    lollie3
    Registered Users Posts: 17 ✭lollie3


    Tomirs
    you are right I am still living with my ex partner 18 months on and at the start he was like this asking me where I was going and still wanting me to come if he brought the kids out - everything you listed up there to do is the way im currently living - mediation didn't work and its going to court were 18 months like this and solicitor reckons it will take another year - its actually draining going home to it every day


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    #6
    tomirs
    Registered Users Posts: 107 ✭✭tomirs


    Stay strong remember every little thing you change has a bigger effect ...Live your life for you and not him ....make your plans for the further you can bet he wont as he is expecting you to sort it all as you more than likely have done for ages ,,the washing , the ironing , the hovering , the filling in the calender , the paying off certain bills ... the weekly shop ...the ordering off fuel for the winter ... get ahead off the game ... do you part but dont do his he more than likely wont thank you for it anyways .... Play fare ... play nice and be smarter ...one step at a time ...one day at a time you waited this long a little longer you are more than able for :)


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    #7
    Jamaican Me Crazy
    Registered Users Posts: 1,111 ✭✭✭Jamaican Me Crazy


    I can't even get my head around the idea of staying in the same house as my ex - fair play to ye for managing it.

    Also make sure you have your own bank account and any income from salary or whatever goes into a single account and then you each pay a share of whatever bills.


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