Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

titan18 · 12-06-2013 2:15am

God, I hate this life, and don't see the point of it. All doctors do for this **** is give medication, and no change. What's the point of it all?

noah45 · 12-06-2013 8:24pm

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Can't even tell how i feel today. Weird. I can feel my humour dipping pretty rapidly right now, but the smallest thing could stop it, or speed it up.. It's extremely confusing.

How is everyone else?.

Feel like this also. Feel so down for no reason , just have no interest in anything or anyone. Absolutely nothing has changed, all is well and taking my meds fine. I don't want to engage with anyone at work and feel that everyone is against me or doesnt want to talk to me. Just really sad, even with this fab weather( or what was fab )

Viva La Gloria · 12-06-2013 11:21pm

having serious anxiety issues with my MSc dissertation at the moment. I'm so caught up in and think about it almost every second of the day, yet I feel so out of touch with it because I still can't pinpoint exactly what it is that I'm trying to research and find out. I don't really get on well with my supervisor which makes things even worse - I do have another amazing lecturer who has helped me so much, but I'm paranoid that he'll just give up on me because I feel like such a hopeless case and am constantly chopping and changing my ideas. I'm aiming for a first in my Masters and I think I'm on track with my exam results but for some reason my dissertation literally has me feeling physically sick thinking about it and I just want it to be over. Such a shame because I really do love researching academically - now I just feel like such an idiot.

Hersheys · 12-06-2013 11:25pm

Viva La Gloria wrote: »

having serious anxiety issues with my MSc dissertation at the moment. I'm so caught up in and think about it almost every second of the day, yet I feel so out of touch with it because I still can't pinpoint exactly what it is that I'm trying to research and find out. I don't really get on well with my supervisor which makes things even worse - I do have another amazing lecturer who has helped me so much, but I'm paranoid that he'll just give up on me because I feel like such a hopeless case and am constantly chopping and changing my ideas. I'm aiming for a first in my Masters and I think I'm on track with my exam results but for some reason my dissertation literally has me feeling physically sick thinking about it and I just want it to be over. Such a shame because I really do love researching academically - now I just feel like such an idiot.

Hang in there. You will have your eureka moment & nobody likes their supervisor

What field are you in?

Hersheys · 13-06-2013 1:54am

Can't sleep. Dreadful thoughts kicking in.

Also can't help but feel like a bad person & bad friend for trivialising others problems and getting upset that they don't want to listen to me when I clearly don't want to listen to them.

Worried about a friend too. Why can't things just be easy?!

Viva La Gloria · 13-06-2013 11:34am

Hersheys wrote: »

Hang in there. You will have your eureka moment & nobody likes their supervisor

What field are you in?

Thank you!

I'm studying marketing. Exam results are out tomorrow and I've been so worried about this that my usual 'pre results anxiety' is nowhere to be seen :P

Hersheys · 13-06-2013 2:18pm

Ha! Love when some other form of anxiety overshadows your normal anxiety. The mind works in mysterious ways.

Anything we can help with?

Viva La Gloria · 13-06-2013 2:31pm

Hersheys wrote: »

Ha! Love when some other form of anxiety overshadows your normal anxiety. The mind works in mysterious ways.

Anything we can help with?

That is always the way with me. The other day I was driving down to Wexford and I thought 'Wow, I'm not in bits about having to drive down!' then I realised that it was because my anxiety has since manifested itself in my dissertation. Always happens haha.

Actually got my exam results early an am now in a pretty good position - only need something pretty attainable in dissertation (55% odd or something) to get a first over all in my Masters. Try 'irrationalise' that, anxiety

Thanks for your kind words

Hersheys · 13-06-2013 2:55pm

No worries, irrational thoughts, particularly to do with education, are dreadful!

Viva La Gloria · 13-06-2013 4:01pm

Tell me about it! And it's particularly horrible when you know you can't avoid and you have to deal with it. I have to do my dissertation so there's no way around it...just have to face it head on!

Hersheys · 13-06-2013 10:10pm

Ridiculously lonely. Feeling so down. Pushing everyone away.

RubyXI · 13-06-2013 10:20pm

Someone asked me to meet up with them next week. Logically I should. But so terrified

Kaching · 14-06-2013 3:36pm

phi3 wrote: »

Someone asked me to meet up with them next week. Logically I should. But so terrified

Doooooooo iiiiiit !:)

RubyXI · 14-06-2013 3:42pm

Kaching wrote: »

Doooooooo iiiiiit !:)

Easier said than done!

Kaching · 14-06-2013 3:55pm

phi3 wrote: »

Easier said than done!

True but you will feel better after it . Fact :pac:

Gremlinertia · 16-06-2013 2:53pm

What a week, was alright, or maybe more accurately, nothingish early on in the week, and it just rapidly spiralled downhill as it went on.. Not able.. Tension headaches and neck pains. I wouldn't mind a lot of this if i knew what was causing it.. I'm so frustrated, back to therapy soon i guess but it'll be a long time before anything happens there. I can't plan anything because i have no idea how i'll be, never mind tomorrow but in an hour.. So along with my usual mood swings and cranky/temper i'm bloody angry.

Phew.. Needed that rant..

TL:DR fcuk it

Call Me Jimmy · 16-06-2013 3:16pm

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Not able.. Tension headaches and neck pains. I wouldn't mind a lot of this if i knew what was causing it..

TL:DR fcuk it

For a couple of years I've had those symptoms, it's so hard to narrow down but I found dehydration was a massive factor. If I drink around 4 glasses of water a day it improves very quickly.

Also yoga and slowing down to try and acknowledge or 'make sense' of the pain, instead of it feeling like a confusing assault on the senses, meditating and breathing can also play a part.

It is terrible though, my sympathies! I still get it from time to time, but lots of water is a big part of it.

Gremlinertia · 16-06-2013 3:30pm

Heyo, thanks, i'm very good for keeping hydrated actually, always have a bottle with me, especially work, but i'll try keep an eye on my intake and see if i'm slacking somewhere that might be causing it.. I really do think there's a big issue with my thought processes, raking over mistakes and regrets, then looking ahead and being scared to change anything so feeling mired.

Call Me Jimmy · 16-06-2013 4:14pm

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Heyo, thanks, i'm very good for keeping hydrated actually, always have a bottle with me, especially work, but i'll try keep an eye on my intake and see if i'm slacking somewhere that might be causing it.. I really do think there's a big issue with my thought processes, raking over mistakes and regrets, then looking ahead and being scared to change anything so feeling mired.

I know this could be taken as blase and I am a sufferer myself but really really, if anything worry about the future (don't do that) but the past is just so gone. It couldn't be more gone. I know everyone knows that but it can be let go. It's a really well-worn path of neurons in your brain inside your skull.. Answering honestly, is it somewhat part of your identity now? This past with all its regrets and problematic situations?

Hope you don't find it patronising but placing emphasis on obvious **** has begun to help me.

Gremlinertia · 16-06-2013 4:26pm

Call Me Jimmy wrote: »

I know this could be taken as blase and I am a sufferer myself but really really, if anything worry about the future (don't do that) but the past is just so gone. It couldn't be more gone. I know everyone knows that but it can be let go. It's a really well-worn path of neurons in your brain inside your skull.. Answering honestly, is it somewhat part of your identity now? This past with all its regrets and problematic situations?

Hope you don't find it patronising but placing emphasis on obvious **** has begun to help me.

Nope, not patronising, just proving damned near impossible to actually let go.. I ruminate and torture myself before i've even noticed falling into it.. Trying cbt soon according to doc in the hospital, will see how that's going in my next appointment with him.

Call Me Jimmy · 16-06-2013 4:30pm

Gremlinertia wrote: »

Nope, not patronising, just proving damned near impossible to actually let go.. I ruminate and torture myself before i've even noticed falling into it.. Trying cbt soon according to doc in the hospital, will see how that's going in my next appointment with him.

For what your talking about CBT I think will be very helpful. Just remember that there will be no results with it through passivity, is all I'd say about that. At least make yourself ready to really try to turn a corner before starting. Best of luck!

Gremlinertia · 16-06-2013 4:57pm

I'm afraid i won't be able to.. Already dropped out of therapy once, but that was private - if i get my public appointment that'll make it mandatory in my mind.. I hope..

starviewadams · 16-06-2013 6:16pm

Feeling terrible (hopeless,no energy,crying,angry) over the past month or so,was hoping it would pass but just seems to be getting worse and worse.Have tried pills and all kinds of CBT etc before and none of it really worked.

Just fed up with everything at this stage.

Hugo Stiglitz · 16-06-2013 6:56pm

I've noticed my mood slowly but steadily dropping over the last week or so. Not enjoying this tbh.

Gremlinertia · 17-06-2013 2:34am

Another eight hours of work.. Head all paranoid that the lads are talking about me.. Cannot wait to go hibernate.

hello goodbye · 17-06-2013 5:29am

Gremlinertia wrote: »

I'm afraid i won't be able to.. Already dropped out of therapy once, but that was private - if i get my public appointment that'll make it mandatory in my mind.. I hope..

Read about self esteem.
Learn you have little and this is what's holding you back.
Everybody can gain self esteem and feel worthy, some take longer than others but either way it is achievable for everyone.
Don't give up ever because it's worth fighting for. Realise you are worth fighting for.

I've suffered from social anxiety, general anxiety and depression for 12 years.
I was young and didn't want treatment.
It got worse. Sometimes it was ok. I felt I never would be able to be 'normal'. This was me. This mess unable to cope with the most basic demands. Cant even go to the shop without having a panic attack. Pathetic me. Useless. And everyone so functional. Content and normal.
Not me.

Now years of torture later I took myself serious and gave it a shot, felt a glimmer of hope that I wasn't so bad after all.

I'm in cognitive behavioural therapy.
I've learnt I'm entitled to the same as everyone else, I am normal. I'm just scared. And that's ok. It doesn't have to dominate my life anymore....
I am as strong as other people
I am just as capable
I am worthy of that experience, and I'm worthy to live life.

Eventually everything is becoming so much less overwhelming. Some experiences I feared are enjoyable now! For example I used to freak about seeing, nevermind talking to neighbors. Now I've had the chance to be able to talk without nerves and found out I live next door to the nicest and one of the most gentle people and I love when we bump into eachother.

I could never believe this would happen in the height of my despair.

Life is beginning to take shape but it is.
It can for you and everyone else. First you need to believe you are worth it. You won't change overnight. But you will change with help. The fear will go.
X

Stereomaniac · 17-06-2013 5:58am

Drank way too much tea tonight while I was watching a video with my friend, and now am dosed up on caffeine. I feel very messed up after this. I became abstinent from alcohol and narcotics 18 months and 2 weeks ago, but I feel very much as though I have taken something. My body is exhausted, but my head will not switch off. I decided to have a look on here and fate showed this thread at the top of the page, as having been the most recent one that was posted in. The fear is a terrible thing to have to contend with. I am reminded of how I used to be on a daily basis on mornings like this. Watching the sun up, terrified of anyone coming into the house and having to pretend that I am only getting out of bed, when in reality I haven't slept. Oh man, I am so glad I turned my life around when I did. I know that I will be alright once all this caffeine leaves my system and I am able to get some sleep. Thank God I am not worrying about what I was before. To the people who posted before me in this thread, I feel your pain. I was hospitalised for a couple of months in 2011 for anxiety/depression and addiction. It is not a great situation to be in, but getting help was the greatest decision that I ever made. Correction, I think the decision was made for me. I was lead to water, and the first mouthfuls were forced into me. Eventually the penny dropped with me, so to speak. I wanted a quick fix, I thought that I would be cured as such, when I left the hospital. In my opinion, and I am not trying to disagree with anyone, I feel that I will always be of a nervous disposition, with the potential to get upset. But if I understand what I am going through in my life (as I understand what is happening to me tonight) I believe that I will then be able to take ownership of my condition on any given day. The most part I am fine, but on nights like tonight, it is a reminder of what every day used to be like. Godspeed!

Call Me Jimmy · 17-06-2013 1:23pm

hello goodbye wrote: »

Read about self esteem.
Learn you have little and this is what's holding you back.
Everybody can gain self esteem and feel worthy, some take longer than others but either way it is achievable for everyone.
Don't give up ever because it's worth fighting for. Realise you are worth fighting for.

I've suffered from social anxiety, general anxiety and depression for 12 years.
I was young and didn't want treatment.
It got worse. Sometimes it was ok. I felt I never would be able to be 'normal'. This was me. This mess unable to cope with the most basic demands. Cant even go to the shop without having a panic attack. Pathetic me. Useless. And everyone so functional. Content and normal.
Not me.

Now years of torture later I took myself serious and gave it a shot, felt a glimmer of hope that I wasn't so bad after all.

I'm in cognitive behavioural therapy.
I've learnt I'm entitled to the same as everyone else, I am normal. I'm just scared. And that's ok. It doesn't have to dominate my life anymore....
I am as strong as other people
I am just as capable
I am worthy of that experience, and I'm worthy to live life.

Eventually everything is becoming so much less overwhelming. Some experiences I feared are enjoyable now! For example I used to freak about seeing, nevermind talking to neighbors. Now I've had the chance to be able to talk without nerves and found out I live next door to the nicest and one of the most gentle people and I love when we bump into eachother.

I could never believe this would happen in the height of my despair.

Life is beginning to take shape but it is.
It can for you and everyone else. First you need to believe you are worth it. You won't change overnight. But you will change with help. The fear will go.
X

Inspiring post! Especially for me, and I assume lots of other people here who may have accepted that they are just 'odd' or destined not to ever enjoy being around people.

Thank you.

RubyXI · 17-06-2013 2:00pm

Just put a letter to my doctor in the post. So stressed about it. Can't believe I did it. I know it's nothing but it's the biggest step I've ever taken. Step one, hopefully of many.

Gremlinertia · 17-06-2013 2:28pm

phi3 wrote: »

Just put a letter to my doctor in the post. So stressed about it. Can't believe I did it. I know it's nothing but it's the biggest step I've ever taken. Step one, hopefully of many.

Oh well done!. That's brilliant, from your posts i know how big this is for you. I for one am very happy and proud for you, as i imagine most others here are.

Deep breaths now, it's all good..

Lets all be anxious/depressed together.

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