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11-05-2004, 15:17   #1
carpocrates
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sex...why?

why can't I say hi to a girl on the street or start talking to one without it being drenched in 5 billion contradicting, codified sexual signals and why can't a girl just strike up a conversation with a lad somewhere without 'oh my god is she coming on to me..etc' or any of the infinite related microscopic nuances that echo off into the void, can sex not just stop rising it's banal head even once... seriously you guys.... can't we evolve past this? or at least work out a system of pinafore or something...
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11-05-2004, 15:21   #2
l3rian
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because thats how our brain works

also, girls are more cautious of strangers, but are a lot more approachable if you are co-workers, in the same gym or club, drunk, or have something obvious in common

Last edited by l3rian; 11-05-2004 at 15:27.
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11-05-2004, 15:23   #3
bizmark
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6 billion humans say this system works quite well tbh
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11-05-2004, 15:35   #4
dahamsta
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Quote:
Originally posted by carpocrates
or at least work out a system of pinafore or something...
ROFL, especially if it's three little maids you're talking to. I think you meant semaphore.

adam
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11-05-2004, 15:47   #5
l3rian
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signal flags? yes thats a gOOd idea
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11-05-2004, 16:10   #6
carpocrates
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semaphore, that was it, knew it seemed wrong when i was writing it.
So what's pinafore, other than the obvious...
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11-05-2004, 16:19   #7
aidan_walsh
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Quote:
Originally posted by carpocrates

So what's pinafore, other than the obvious...


He is an Englishman!
For he himself has said it,
And it's greatly to his credit,
That he is an Englishman!


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11-05-2004, 16:59   #8
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Also an apron....
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16-05-2004, 00:44   #9
pork99
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Why sex?

recombine DNA, resist disease blah blah blah

http://www.amazon.co.uk/exec/obidos/...344221-0807660
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16-05-2004, 22:40   #10
amp
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There's always the recreational part of sex which I vaguely remember being quite fun.

If chatting up people was easy (for people who aren't fabulously wealthy/famous/good looking) then I'm fairly sure the world would be a much more boring place.

hmmm this is more of Personal Issues kind of thing but sure we'll hang to it for the moment. It's not like Humanities cup is overflowething at the mo.
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17-05-2004, 00:02   #11
Agent Orange
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6 billion humans say this system works quite well tbh
Even the two billion who live in misery?
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17-05-2004, 11:11   #12
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6 billion humans say this system works quite well tbh
Shower o' muppets.
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17-05-2004, 12:18   #13
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Also an apron....
Wearing an apron during sex....ooooooo saucy! Yet practical.
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17-05-2004, 12:37   #14
Beruthiel
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hmmm this is more of Personal Issues kind of thing but sure we'll hang to it for the moment.
no way ampie
tis not a personal issue! it's an evolving issue or the lack there off...
now if he had said that he doesn’t want to have sex with women, what’s wrong with me? Then it would be a PI….
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17-05-2004, 12:51   #15
MiCr0
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I'd like if people stuck to the topic - this isn't After Hours after all
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17-05-2004, 18:06   #16
simu
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Re: sex...why?

Quote:
Originally posted by carpocrates
why can't I say hi to a girl on the street or start talking to one without it being drenched in 5 billion contradicting, codified sexual signals and why can't a girl just strike up a conversation with a lad somewhere without 'oh my god is she coming on to me..etc' or any of the infinite related microscopic nuances that echo off into the void, can sex not just stop rising it's banal head even once... seriously you guys.... can't we evolve past this? or at least work out a system of pinafore or something...
I take it you're still a teenager?

When you first get into flirting and sex and so on, you start seeing something you had never really paid attention to before all over the place and it gets a bit overwhelming. But usually, people get used to it and don't get embarassed about it quite as easily after a few years.
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20-05-2004, 11:43   #17
qwertyphobia
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"why can't I say hi to a girl on the street or start talking to one without it being drenched in 5 billion contradicting, codified sexual signals "

because we have been codified to send/read thoes signals

You can't stop sending them out or noticing them, but you can stop worrying about them so much, why is so important to you?

If you flirt with someone you don't have to marry them, you are just flirting. Consider it a social lubericant if everyone was harsh, abruate, rude and cold with each other swociety would suck and probably wouldn't have made it this far. Flirting and friendlyness sets up bonds between people and gets them to be nicer to each other without a quid pro quo return favour being expected.





I like that term "Social lubericant" must see if I can find more opportunity to use it
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24-05-2004, 14:04   #18
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the original poster is right, I have said it so many times myself!
I dont understand why when I go out it is so difficult to meet someone...unless the guy comes on to me strong or is creepy about it I wish they would talk to me! instead of making eye contact all night and that across the room flirt crap...They are usually with thier friends when this is going on so for a woman to walk up to a group of guys and try to talk to one of them its more intimidating.
More men should just be a man and talk to the ladie if they want to...if she isnt interested then so what, that is life! we will never get anywhere by saying "i wish I had talked to that person" I certainly havnt given up and will attempt a conversation if I think he is interested, but if a guy is too much of a girl to talk to me then I dont want to be with him anyway, I (like most girls) want a man who knows what he wants and goes after it. And no, before the sarcasm starts, I dont mean serial killers,stalkers and the like.
It's all about confidence guys and girls, and a great smile
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02-06-2004, 11:51   #19
Iago
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So Beat, tell me about yourself? Do you come here often? What brings you out tonight?



The problem isn't so much that men don't/won't/can't chat to women, it's more about perceptions. If a guy comes up to you in a (delete as appropriate) bar/club/street/shop, the general first reaction is what's he out to get?

When you get past this and evolve into a conversation you may start to like him, and vice versa and who knows where it may go. Getting over that first hurdle is difficult though, you have to be confident but not arrogant, what can you say that isn't a line?

I don't do this often but..

I couldn't help noticing...

Hi, would you like.....

and even thought it isn't a line it sometimes gets taken up that way. I think you'll find that the confident guys are generally the ones that have nothing to lose, i.e. they are only looking for a one night thing and if you turn them down then they'll simply approach someone else. There's 500 girls in the club at least one of them will say yes and take them home!!

Getting back to the original post, I think it's all about involuntary instincts, engrained in our subconcious are two main overriding genetic orders. Self-preservation and preservation of the human race, basic I know, but none the less true regardless. Society strives to harnass these orders, to constrict and restrict them, to force us to ignore and fight them at every opportunity. To a great extent this has been successful, we no longer rut in public or simply take what we desire the way our ancestors would have (well most of us don't anyway ) we have courtship rituals and we generally stick to monogamus (see I can't even spell it, much less do it :ninja: ) relationships, even though that flies in the face of our genetic build. So when we meet someone of the opposite sex, without even realising it we are measuring them, does she look healthy and fertile? Does he look strong enough to protect me and our children? This has evolved with society to include issues of wealth and prosperity, and so without voluntarily doing anything there is none the less a tension that appears as soon as you start talking to a member of the opposite sex, which does not dissipate until both parties decide that there is no attraction between them.

I think...
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04-06-2004, 00:05   #20
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I was talking to a girl from New York, and she was amazed that guys and girls in Ireland did'nt mingle and chat up more. Apparently in New York chatting someone up is as easy as asking "where did you get your tan ?". If they're not interested they say so straight away and then you move onto someone else with no hard feelings.

USA! USA! USA!

In the gym I'm in, the club discourage you from talking to people and I would'nt dream of staring a conversation with anyone in the place.

But somehow the system we have here seems to work, your better off just not thinking about it and enjoying yourself.
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