There once was a dentist named Stone
Who saw all his patients alone.
In a fit of depravity
He filled the wrong cavity,
And my, how his practice has grown!
There once was a fellow named Dave
Who dug up a whore from her grave
She was mouldy as sh*t
and missing a tit
But think of the money he saved.
There was a young lady named Hitchin
Who was scratching her crotch in the kitchen.
Her mother said, "Rose,
It's the crabs, I suppose."
She said, "Yes, and the buggers are itchin'."
There once was a man from Nantucket
Whose thing was so long he could suck it.
He said, with a grin as he wiped off his chin,
"If my ear was a pussy, I'd F*ck it!"
A strange young fellow from Leeds
Rashly swallowed a package of seeds.
Great tufts of fine grass
Sprouted out of his ass
And his balls were covered with weeds.