I don't drink, I don't particular like people in general or small talk. Also my uncles and dad don't seem to understand I don't like to drink any more and they will be offering me drink and making jokes about me not drinking...
I don't care if you don't drink but you don't like people in general? Jesus wept. I'm sorry but you also seem to have a bit of a stick up your arse about you not drinking. Just laugh it off. Nobody's bothered. I'm vegetarian and I've had all manners of grief or jokes off people in the family but if you brush it off, have a laugh nobody cares.
Also just think what are you going to remember in life? Going to your cousin's communion and have an afternoon with your family, which let's face it not all of them will be around forever or the time you couldn't be bothered to go and spent your time on the internet complaining about it? Go to the pub with a smile on your face, enjoy it and cherish the moments you have with your family.