I knew a few really bad spoofers when I was working in a supermarket. I think somehow they felt embarrassed about working there and hate to make stuff up to make themselves look better.
One English guy claimed to have been a supervisor in a nuclear power plant in England. He never explained the transition from that to an Irish supermarket.
Another guy in his late twenties would always brag about how many girls he'd kissed the night before. I never went out with him so I can't confirm he was lying, but he'd talk about it like he was a kid, saying things like, "Yeah, I shifted seven girls last night!" Disregarding his lack of looks or charm, surely at least one of the seven might notice him kissing another girl in a small nightclub.
Another guy would always go on about all the drugs he'd taken the night before, but again, in a way that sounded exactly like he'd never taken any in his life: "I had sooooo much cocaine last night!"
He also once claimed he was late for work as on the way, a driver had splashed him as he was walking on the footpath. So naturally he dragged the driver out of the car and beat him up in the middle of the busy city centre street.
I also had to spend literally a few hours one night listening to one guy go on about all the incredibly violent fights he'd been in where he'd almost got killed. None of them were just scraps: they were all Hollywood-style set pieces with weapons and a number of different locations in a single fight. I might have believed one or two, but he kept going on (Even though no-one asked to hear the stories) and must have told us of about fifty fights.
At one point he showed me a picture of a girl and told me he loved her and though he wasn't going out with her, he'd never go out with anyone else and he'd marry her. A few months later I started to see him going about hand-in-hand with a girl from work, who most certainly was not the girl from the picture.
He also said he'd kill himself when he was thirty. I wonder how that worked out for him.
I know one person in particular though, who used to lie pretty much non-stop, but they do seem to have improved.
Most of them were such banal lies though. They weren't designed to make him seem cooler; it was like he just wanted something to say. Like, he'd make up some piece of trivia about a film or song that could easily be proven untrue.
I think he may also have claimed to be meeting people but then just wander around town on his own.
Once, at the age of about fifteen, he claimed to know the entire Irish football squad through a contact, and engage in various social activities with them.
He'd often claim to have interesting encounters with celebrities, all unverifiable.
There were countless stories of success with women, though no-one who knew him had ever seen even kiss a girl. At one point, he'd tell lies about going out with girls in areas of his life you weren't involved in (eg telling his college friends he was going out with a girl from work and vice versa). But then friends from different parts of his life got to know each other and it was discovered that all of these girls were made up.
He also told me he'd met his ex (I'd never heard of) out and found out she was getting married. Then a few years later told a friend the exact same story.
Among the best: Telling a friend of a friend that he'd met the lead singer of a famous band. Once he'd finished his detailed story, the friend of a friend calmly told him he'd just had his own anecdote recounted back to him, that he'd told to my friend about a year previously!
Another time he claimed to have asked a good-looking popular girl to the Debs, and she'd said yes. Shortly after, he was in a café with a mutual friend, when she walked in. Our mutual friend called her over, said hi, then said to the spoofer "Sorry, what's your name again?" I think the other friend didn't ask about the Debs so as not to cause any further embarrassment.
The sad thing was, he's a nice guy and didn't need to lie, but he doesn't seem to do it anymore.
Last edited by The King of Moo; 16-02-2012 at 13:32.