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The Online Dating Thread Part II **Mod Warning** Read First Post/or Post 7389

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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,040 ✭✭✭Armaghmagic


    Galvasean wrote: »
    I was thinking of leaving it until Sunday (as her first week back may be tough, with Juniour Cert practical exams on), and then calling her to find out what the story is. What do you think?

    I just really like her and we have spoken about the way you have to ignore people on POF if you dont like their messages but I think we have gone beyond that stage of it being ok to ignore me??

    Sounds like she has found somebody else or lost interest in you but is too cowardly to give you the time / decency to tell you. Happens a lot (and it's not exclusive to people you meet online either) these days. As Lotwan said, it takes a few seconds to take a text. If she's not willing to spare a precious minute of her life for you then she's being extremely rude and not worth your time.
    And yes, it has gone well beyond the stage where it is okay for her to simply ignore you, but people can be rude dicks like that.
    It's happened to a few times at this point. It sucks donkey balls when it happens, especially if thing had appeared to be going extremely well, but the best thing you can do is move on and forget her.
    As an aside, personally I like to text them to tell them how rude they have been and how they lack common courtesy. It never achieves anything, but damn I don't like the idea of just letting them away with being so callous.

    Yeah I was thinking I was being ignored alright but didn't want to admit it......in fairness when we were chatting about meeting up it could take her a day to txt back! I definitely can't leave it like this! If I hear nothing there will be contact made about how rude she is being, there is a real person with real feelings here! Nothing worse than plain bad manners.


  • Registered Users Posts: 51,342 ✭✭✭✭That_Guy


    Yeah I was thinking I was being ignored alright but didn't want to admit it......in fairness when we were chatting about meeting up it could take her a day to txt back! I definitely can't leave it like this! If I hear nothing there will be contact made about how rude she is being, there is a real person with real feelings here! Nothing worse than plain bad manners.

    It sounds like she might be ignoring you mate. Sucks. It shouldn't be a case of you having to figure it out for yourself by "taking the hint". It should be a case of her having the decency to just let you know if she's interested or not.

    It only takes a minute to send a text or give you a call to let you know where you stand instead of racking your brains about it.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,040 ✭✭✭Armaghmagic


    Well im glad people see why I am annoyed / confused......a terrible thing to say but there are plenty off the site that I would love to have ignore me! Just the way life is I guess!

    Well I have sent her a txt, and this is the jist of it:

    "Hey Mary (fake name), I was just wondering why you have been ignoring my txts.....if you don't want to see me again then that is ok, I just think I deserve at least a text after collecting and dropping you from and to your house, taking you out for dinner, etc. I realise you may be busy with work but it should'nt take this long to reply. I basically just want to know where I stand as I do like you but can't wait around forever, you understand?"

    A bit OTT or what do you guys think?


  • Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    Chances are she wont reply to you, but with any luck you may have sewn some seeds in her mind so she might be a bit nicer to the next poor sap.


  • Registered Users Posts: 51,342 ✭✭✭✭That_Guy


    Seems like an alright text to me lad. Now stick in a few F Bombs and you're good to go. :pac:


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,040 ✭✭✭Armaghmagic


    Galvasean wrote: »
    Chances are she wont reply to you, but with any luck you may have sewn some seeds in her mind so she might be a bit nicer to the next poor sap.

    Yeah I realise that but I have signed up to free txts to all networks so at least it cost me nothing:D


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,040 ✭✭✭Armaghmagic


    That_Guy wrote: »
    Seems like an alright text to me lad. Now stick in a few F Bombs and you're good to go. :pac:

    Oh trust me I had to restrain myself :mad:

    Not tarring all the ladies with the same brush, im sure this is an isolated incident.....if any wish to reinstate my trust in the female species feel free to PM me :p


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,000 ✭✭✭andreac


    Oh trust me I had to restrain myself :mad:

    Not tarring all the ladies with the same brush, im sure this is an isolated incident.....if any wish to reinstate my trust in the female species feel free to PM me :p

    If its any consolation ive been through this several times recently with several different guys, being ignored after meeting up, its horrible.

    A simple text isnt that hard to write to someone. You dont have to see the person ever again, its only a few words.

    But on the other hand, the guy i met a month ago is lovely, we've met up twice and had a lovely time, been in touch everyday and hes great at keeping in contact. I have a good feeling about this one :D


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,040 ✭✭✭Armaghmagic


    andreac wrote: »
    If its any consolation ive been through this several times recently with several different guys, being ignored after meeting up, its horrible.

    A simple text isnt that hard to write to someone. You dont have to see the person ever again, its only a few words.

    But on the other hand, the guy i met a month ago is lovely, we've met up twice and had a lovely time, been in touch everyday and hes great at keeping in contact. I have a good feeling about this one :D

    Well it is good to hear a success story to keep the spirits up so thanks and I hope it works out for you :)

    It will be interesting to see what she replies with (if anything which is unlikely). There are POF in the sea:rolleyes: so I guess I will just have to polish the rod (no innuendo meant:D) and add some new bait!


  • Registered Users Posts: 608 ✭✭✭LoTwan


    Regardless of the llama guy I have turned my profiles off. I need a few days to clear my head

    Armaghmagic... I'm sorry she messed you around. It's not nice, at all.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 51,342 ✭✭✭✭That_Guy


    I guess I will just have to polish the rod (no innuendo meant:D) and add some new bait!

    My tagline is "Just sticking my rod out there so apologise you need not.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,040 ✭✭✭Armaghmagic


    That_Guy wrote: »
    My tagline is "Just sticking my rod out there so apologise you need not.

    Love it.......has cheered my day up no end :p


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 5,671 ✭✭✭BraziliaNZ


    Do none of you tire of this dating thing? It's just such a pain meeting strangers and going through the same chit chat all the time. Some of you seem to go on so many dates I don't know where you get the enthusiasm. Tried dating for a while and the whole thing just made me appreciate being single tbh. Anyone else feel this way?


  • Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    BraziliaNZ wrote: »
    Do none of you tire of this dating thing? It's just such a pain meeting strangers and going through the same chit chat all the time. Some of you seem to go on so many dates I don't know where you get the enthusiasm. Tried dating for a while and the whole thing just made me appreciate being single tbh. Anyone else feel this way?

    Sometimes. Take a break. Long for it again. Go back. repeat cycle ad nausea.


  • Registered Users Posts: 16 maoidh


    Well im glad people see why I am annoyed / confused......a terrible thing to say but there are plenty off the site that I would love to have ignore me! Just the way life is I guess!

    Well I have sent her a txt, and this is the jist of it:

    "Hey Mary (fake name), I was just wondering why you have been ignoring my txts.....if you don't want to see me again then that is ok, I just think I deserve at least a text after collecting and dropping you from and to your house, taking you out for dinner, etc. I realise you may be busy with work but it should'nt take this long to reply. I basically just want to know where I stand as I do like you but can't wait around forever, you understand?"

    A bit OTT or what do you guys think?

    Well i know how you feel. Was texting a fella i met a while ago and arranged to meet up again. I texted him a few times and got no answer but thought he's probably just busy. The night we were supposed to meet up came and went and still didn't hear from him. I texted him and asked why did he bother ringing and texting me if didn't want to meet up, got no answer. Then his GIRLFRIEND rang me 2 days later!!!!

    Not a nice feeling!!
    I think it's very easy to text someone and say you've lost interest or whatever, not very decent of her to keep you hanging like that. Hopefully she'll answer your text this time.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 5,671 ✭✭✭BraziliaNZ


    Galvasean wrote: »
    Sometimes. Take a break. Long for it again. Go back. repeat cycle ad nausea.

    I think it's kind of depressing for me when I meet someone and realise I have no interest, which has been the case on pretty much any date I've gone on. Any proper girlfriend I had has come through meeting randomly and getting to know each other and hooking up eventually. The whole setup thing of dates kind of puts me off.
    Glad it's working for you guys though but haven't had one of these random clicks with someone in a long time!


  • Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    Not getting much in the way of profile views (even the ones that viewed me aint viewing!) Time to update the photos so the girls will think, "Ooh, whose that sexy new man!? *click* Oh! Him... :("


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 5,671 ✭✭✭BraziliaNZ


    Well im glad people see why I am annoyed / confused......a terrible thing to say but there are plenty off the site that I would love to have ignore me! Just the way life is I guess!

    Well I have sent her a txt, and this is the jist of it:

    "Hey Mary (fake name), I was just wondering why you have been ignoring my txts.....if you don't want to see me again then that is ok, I just think I deserve at least a text after collecting and dropping you from and to your house, taking you out for dinner, etc. I realise you may be busy with work but it should'nt take this long to reply. I basically just want to know where I stand as I do like you but can't wait around forever, you understand?"

    A bit OTT or what do you guys think?

    You shouldn't have bothered sending it really. If she's ignoring your texts just forget about her and move on. You're not winning anything by sending a text, it comes across as a little needy to me, my advice would be to just leave it in future.


  • Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    BraziliaNZ wrote: »
    Glad it's working for you guys though

    Who said it's working??? :pac:

    The way I see it is 99% of relationships dont work out in the grand scheme of things so online dating is no different in that respect.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 5,671 ✭✭✭BraziliaNZ


    Galvasean wrote: »
    Who said it's working??? :pac:

    The way I see it is 99% of relationships dont work out in the grand scheme of things so online dating is no different in that respect.

    I guess so, but after the last few dates, I just can't be bothered and I'm now just happy living my nice cushy life as a singleton. It's amazing how many people thrive towards having a partner so much, it's not the be all and end all of life.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 8,163 ✭✭✭Beefy78


    Galvasean wrote: »
    Not getting much in the way of profile views (even the ones that viewed me aint viewing!) Time to update the photos so the girls will think, "Ooh, whose that sexy new man!? *click* Oh! Him... :("

    Sounds stupid but I've never even thought of that. I jsut keep the same pictures up all the time. After this amount of time every girl on pof must have seen my profile so time to dupe them into looking again! :D


  • Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    BraziliaNZ wrote: »
    It's amazing how many people thrive towards having a partner so much, it's not the be all and end all of life.

    Fo' sho', I remember when my last proper relationship ended I was taken aback (in a good way) at just how much time to myself, not to mention extra cash I had. I'm the kind of person who can enjoy being single alright, but after a while start wanting a woman to have a relationship with. Instinct perhaps?

    edit: just got a mail (on OKC of all places). Girl seems very nice, lots of common interests. Location: Manchester, United Kingdom.
    False alarm. Back to zee drawing board(s).


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,699 ✭✭✭amacca


    BraziliaNZ wrote: »
    I think it's kind of depressing for me when I meet someone and realise I have no interest, which has been the case on pretty much any date I've gone on. Any proper girlfriend I had has come through meeting randomly and getting to know each other and hooking up eventually. The whole setup thing of dates kind of puts me off.
    Glad it's working for you guys though but haven't had one of these random clicks with someone in a long time!

    sounds familiar...........in my case you can add not clicking with the one/ones I like on top of going out briefly with people I have no interest in

    its a depressing state of affairs................sometimes I wonder if its some sort of test or challenge I'm supposed to overcome or just some sort of cosmic joke at my expense..........


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 5,671 ✭✭✭BraziliaNZ


    Galvasean wrote: »
    Fo' sho', I remember when my last proper relationship ended I was taken aback (in a good way) at just how much time to myself, not to mention extra cash I had. I'm the kind of person who can enjoy being single alright, but after a while start wanting a woman to have a relationship with. Instinct perhaps?

    edit: just got a mail (on OKC of all places). Girl seems very nice, lots of common interests. Location: Manchester, United Kingdom.
    False alarm. Back to zee drawing board(s).

    Yeah well we all want to get laid sometimes too!


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,508 ✭✭✭hollypink


    That_Guy wrote: »
    My tagline is "Just sticking my rod out there so apologise you need not.

    that made me :D
    BraziliaNZ wrote: »
    I think it's kind of depressing for me when I meet someone and realise I have no interest, which has been the case on pretty much any date I've gone on. Any proper girlfriend I had has come through meeting randomly and getting to know each other and hooking up eventually. The whole setup thing of dates kind of puts me off.
    Glad it's working for you guys though but haven't had one of these random clicks with someone in a long time!

    Yes that's why I closed my online dating account, just found it too difficult to get psyched up to meet someone and all the nervousness of it and then for there to be absolutely no spark. It's great that it's working for some people on this thread tho!


  • Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    BraziliaNZ wrote: »
    You shouldn't have bothered sending it really. If she's ignoring your texts just forget about her and move on. You're not winning anything by sending a text, it comes across as a little needy to me, my advice would be to just leave it in future.

    I disagree. Sometimes people need to know that they are dickheads! :pac:

    For example, a girl stood me up on a date so I waited a day or two to see if she bothered to come out with an excuse. She didn't bother so I mailed her something along the lines of: "Cheers for not turning up. Sitting in the bar on my own for an hour was a good use of my Sunday."
    Sometimes you just need to vent and I like to go for the source.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 5,671 ✭✭✭BraziliaNZ


    Galvasean wrote: »
    I disagree. Sometimes people need to know that they are dickheads! :pac:

    She wasn't interested. There's no need to take offense to her not getting back, that's just what people do. I've done it people have done it to me. Sounds like he was pinning too much hope on the date now after sending that.


  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 5,671 ✭✭✭BraziliaNZ


    Galvasean wrote: »
    I disagree. Sometimes people need to know that they are dickheads! :pac:

    For example, a girl stood me up on a date so I waited a day or two to see if she bothered to come out with an excuse. She didn't bother so I mailed her something along the lines of: "Cheers for not turning up. Sitting in the bar on my own for an hour was a good use of my Sunday."
    Sometimes you just need to vent and I like to go for the source.

    Being stood up is different though


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 11,255 ✭✭✭✭Esoteric_


    I don't think I'm cut out for this online thing.

    Disappeared off the dating site for about a week because personal sh!t hit the fan and the person I was talking to is now seeing someone. Lol, this is why I stick to just meeting people in bars when I'm drunk. So much easier. :)


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  • Registered Users Posts: 30,746 ✭✭✭✭Galvasean


    In Armaghmagic's case though, they had been on 3 dates and things were going swimmingly (date 3 even ended with kissing). I think he has every right to feel aggrieved in such a scenario and deserved the common courtesy of a simple text.


This discussion has been closed.
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