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The Breast Feeding Support Thread

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  • Registered Users Posts: 482 ✭✭annamcmahon


    I cut and pasted it from the post you'd mentioned How Strange. It was about 6 pages in. It's crazy how difficult it is describe.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,992 ✭✭✭dublinlady


    How bad is it to consider using formula at night in the hope that she'd sleep longer? I'm just so tired and she still waking every 3 hrs at 6 weeks... I use an expressed bottle for the 3 am feed. Sometimes my oh gives it. But I'm so tired I need more sleep! In consecutive hrs!!!
    I don't know what I'm looking for here... I want to keep goin but as the weeks go on and there's no stretch it's getting tougher and tougher.....
    I don't even know if I mean this... I'm just having a bad moment... Oh I dunno....
    I never had any expectations of myself with the breastfeeding - and during the day I like it and will prob keep it up longer than I thought I would... It's jst the nites.....


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,215 ✭✭✭galah


    DL, I don't think it's bad, don't beat yourself up over it - we've supplemented with one bottle at night since birth, it was the only thing that kept me sane...

    BUT: I found that the bottle doesnt make our baby sleep longer at all (probably not what you wanted to hear) ;-( there is absolutely no correlation between what type of/how much feed he gets and how long he sleeps. Maybe it's different for other people, but that's what I found...On the upside though, if you use a bottle, your hubby can give it to your little one while you get a bit of a break...

    I may get killed for saying it - but do whatever you need to do, and if that means a bottle, give the bottle. Your little one is getting all the goodness from breastfeeding anyway, and a happy and relaxed mummy makes for a happier relaxed baby...


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,339 ✭✭✭How Strange


    dublinlady you have to do what you think is best for you and your family. No one can say you're right or wrong for doing it your way.

    In my experience the sleep deprivation was the worst thing and I remember being so stressed in the evening at the thoughts of another night without sleep. My lad dropped his 11pm feed around 8 weeks which meant I was getting a break of 5 hours or so at night and once that happened I felt like we'd turned a corner and somehow it got easier because I was getting a block of sleep.

    Most babies settle down after 6 weeks and as regards breastfeeding your son has been feeding so much to establish your supply so he may start sleeping longer between night feeds.

    Take each day/night as it comes but I'd consider an expressed bottle first. Get into a routine where your husband gives it at 11pm or whatever time he wakes. Then you feed the next time. That should give you a good few hours sleep. Honestly, one night of decent sleep and you'll wake up feeling like you've won the lottery.


  • Registered Users Posts: 451 ✭✭LilMrsDahamsta


    My lad woke every 2-3 hours day and night til he was about 12 weeks, and still wakes twice a night at close to 8 months, so I know the exhaustion you're talking about. I found that even if I couldn't get many consecutive hours of sleep, if I got enough overall I felt much better. For me, this meant going to bed in the evening and getting up in the morning at the same time as the baby, and getting hubby to mind him while I had a nap sometime during the day too. Admittedly nothing else at all got done, and the house was filthy, but the breastfeeding, and life generally, definitely got easier with a few extra hours shut eye, even if very disjointed.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 9,624 ✭✭✭wmpdd3


    DL have you tried co-sleeping? would it be really out of the question, can you feed her lying down? These are the things that save me. I really understand if you wouldn't dream of having the baby in the bed for the night, but it could work.

    I've had a few off days and given baby a bottle of formula as i didnt have much expressed. We gave him 8oz of aptamil :0 at 8pm one night, around 5 week old.

    When we finally got his wind up, he passed out for about 1 hour. Woke up, his nappy exploded, he had a short boob feed and slept for 4 hours....

    Now at 9 weeks, he goes to bed with me at 11pm, I feed him, he falls asleep on my belly. I move him to the middle of the bed. He wakes about twice for a little feed lying down and usually at 8am he wakes for a massive 2 boob feed.

    Before that he used to wake loads of time during the night but I just stuck a boob in his mouth and went back to sleep.

    My daughter was bottle fed and she woke every hour for 1 oz until she was 12 weeks old. It wasnt too bad as I didnt really have anything else to do, but some days I spent stayed in bed till 4pm with her as i was so exhausted.


    Just to say, my son is 8 week old tonight and today I weened him off the nipple sheilds, He just wasnt able to latch on till 8 weeks old! But now he's an expert.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,992 ✭✭✭dublinlady


    Thanks ladies for your advice, my problem seems to be that I'm a bad sleeper - on that it takes my about an hr to fall asleep , which doesn't leave much time for sleeping between feeds! So even if I have her in the bed with me - I still have to wake so ultimately still have to fall back asleep! And I think I find it easier to fall asleep with her in Moses basket as I worry about her less! Sometimes I think it's the anxiety about not being able to sleep that prevents me from falling asleep ! I've always been like this.. But now knowing I only have 2 hrs before she wakes again I think puts much more pressure on me to fall asleep so it's a vicious cycle!!!
    I think from what you said giving her formula ultimately won't help her sleep for longer spells and so prob would be of no benefit to me....
    I guess this is why ppl say motherhood is tough! Don't get me wrong - I completely love her and being a mom - but I feel the sleep deprivation is making miss some of the pleasure of the experience - I just have to hope she does drop a feed and so I can get some sleep - and fingers crossed that will happen sooner rather than later as the thought of this continuing when I have to go back to work is just to much to handle right now!!!


  • Registered Users Posts: 862 ✭✭✭red fraggle


    dublinlady i know what ur sayin bout feelin like ya miss out. e is pretty ok at sleeping now but i think i missed out on the joy of her bein a tiny baby cos i was so tired myself!!!!! sleep is so important!!

    i started givin e a kind of double feed. say i would feed her at 8 and then go into the dimly lit quiet bedroom for a 9.15/9.30 feed and let her feed til she came off. i think this is what helped her start sleeping for longer periods. it might be worth a try. i hope she starts sleepin a little longer for you. would u consider sleepin in another room and lettin your oh mind her for the night? i know i would prob worry but if u got one good nights sleep u would be like a new woman for a while!!


    my problem today is i think my boob is blocked or has dried up!!! is this possible? e drank for a short while and then went mad pullin at it and crying. put her on the other one and she drank for ages no problem. earlier on the same boob she drank for a short while and i tried expressin to empty it but nothin came out!! its a bit sore to touch now but its not hard really. any ideas much appreciated!!!!:confused:


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,992 ✭✭✭dublinlady


    I'll def give the double feed idea a shot! I'll try anything at this stage!! I've been trying all afternoon to make A give me her first smile.... Nothing!! Hehe - I'm dancing and jumping around like a lunatic pulling faces - well I suppose the dog barked so that's sonething!!!!!

    I know very little about blocked ducts etc but be careful it doesn't develop into mastitis - I did read somewhere to try pump for 5 mins even with no milk coming out to try clear it? Signs of mastitis would be redness, tenderness , swelling and heat around the boob and also raised temperature in general - but it doesn't sound like that at the mo anyway, weird that there's no milk, hopefully someone here can help ya more as I'm a bit clueless!!


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,339 ✭✭✭How Strange


    red fraggle it could be a blocked duct. Is it sore in a particular area? I can't see how your supply would decrease so drastically if you're exclusively breastfeeding and have been fine up to now.

    Look for red patches/marks on the breast or a painful area or a lump. Also another sign is flu like symptoms so ferling cold and shivery followed by a fever. The sooner you react the better if it's a blocked duct. You should take ibuprofen for inflammation and keep the breast hot (shower, bath or hot water bottle) and hand massage to clear the initial blockage then latch your little one on to feed. When hand expressing you want to see the milk coming out of the whole nipple and not just a part of it. I'd feed more often from that breast over the next 24 hours too.

    The most important thing if it's a blocked duct is rest, rest and more rest. Do nothing except feed and rest for 3 days as it really wipes you.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 862 ✭✭✭red fraggle


    thanks dublinlady and how strange. i actually do have a lump/painful area. feelin ok other than that. ive massaged and expressed 2 ounces and had e feed aswell. she got a bit out i think. ill be feeding her again in over an hour and i might try see can she get anything out of it then again. duno why it happened all of a sudden. was grand yesterday!!

    hope it doesnt take too much out of me!! had a few things to do but i guess ill have to put them off if im not well!! mad how somethin as simple as that could make ya feel so unwell!! thanks again!


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,339 ✭✭✭How Strange


    Red fraggle is the milk flowing freely when you hand express? If so you've probably cleared the blockage if not then its still blocked. If its still blocked get into a hot bath of you have one and keep expressing until the milk is flowing.

    My son had terrible wind one day at 10 weeks (caused by me eating hummus!) and I started to feel unwell that evening. I had mastitis in the first week so after the blocked duct I was always on the look out for both. A few times over the next few months I noticed a red patch (always on the same breast) and I'd take my son into bed and feed as much as we could for the night. It can happen so quickly if your little one isn't emptying the breast.


  • Registered Users Posts: 9,624 ✭✭✭wmpdd3


    (caused by me eating hummus!)

    oops, this could be why my baby is in agony with wind all day.....


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,339 ✭✭✭How Strange


    wmpdd3 wrote: »
    oops, this could be why my baby is in agony with wind all day.....
    Honestly! I wouldn't have believed it if someone else said it. We had a bad few days after I ate asparagus salad too!


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,617 ✭✭✭Cat Melodeon


    I have a bit of a problem. My girl is 4 and a half months now. We're going to a wedding at the start of May and we'll be leaving her and her brother with their grandparents overnight. There is no way we can bring them with us, nor can we afford to have the grandparents come with us as stay-over babysitters. For the past 2 weeks I've been expressing and trying to get herself to take a bottle. I've tried every bottle - avent (same as her soother), tommee tippee, dr brown, nuk - you name it, we've tried it. She simply won't suck on anything that isn't me. She has a tongue tie that isn't helping.

    We've tried all the tricks I know - different times, different levels of hunger, me doing it, husband doing it. Half an hour of struggle results in about a teaspoonful of ebm taken and she now screams in temper if she as much as sees a bottle. If it wasn't for this wedding, I wouldn't be bothered as I've no intention in weaning her until she's at least a year old. But her gran has to be able to feed her for 36 hrs and she'll only be starting with solids around then.

    Any ideas? We could try spoon feeding or using a syringe, but that's a bit unpleasant for her and fiddly for her gran. The 'What to expect' book talks about introducing a cup around now. Has anyone done that this early? I'm at my wits' end, any tips would be much appreciated!


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,339 ✭✭✭How Strange


    Would you start with a sippy cup now? The wedding is about 5 weeks away so you've loads of time to get her used to it. You can get starter sippy cups from 4 months. Maybe try getting your husband to feed her with the cup and in a couple of weeks get her gran to give it a go so both of them are used to it.

    I started my son on a sippy cup with water at 6 months and by 7.5 months that's what he took his drinks out of in crèche. And they say girls are more advanced at these things so she should be quite good at holding and drinking from it in 5 weeks.


  • Registered Users Posts: 9,624 ✭✭✭wmpdd3




  • Registered Users Posts: 41 Future Baby


    How serious is getting a coldsore while breastfeeding? I'm after getting one in the past 3 hours, prob due to the amount of sun I got in the past 2 days and prob run down from been on the clock 24 /7 breastfeeding, changing nappys, having dinner ready for the other fellow when he comes home for work ect... you know urself men have it so easy sometimes I wonder if I wasnt breastfeeding would be have got up for night feeds anyway!:mad:

    Google should be banned as Im reading the worst cases about coldsores and babies end up dead, like this story

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/health/article-1081076/Did-I-kill-baby-kiss-How-anguished-mother-didnt-discover-danger-common-cold-sore-virus-late-.html

    I'm going to ring the doctors in the morning and see if I can get an appointment just to be safe!


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,937 ✭✭✭implausible


    Would you start with a sippy cup now? The wedding is about 5 weeks away so you've loads of time to get her used to it. You can get starter sippy cups from 4 months. Maybe try getting your husband to feed her with the cup and in a couple of weeks get her gran to give it a go so both of them are used to it.

    I started my son on a sippy cup with water at 6 months and by 7.5 months that's what he took his drinks out of in crèche. And they say girls are more advanced at these things so she should be quite good at holding and drinking from it in 5 weeks.

    +1 on the sippy cup. My wee man never really had a bottle and took both ebm and formula from a cup. Because it's so different, it might distract her from it not being a boob. Has her gran fed her on her own without you being there? I think that when the wee darlings know that there's a boob in the vicinity, they look for it!


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,937 ✭✭✭implausible


    How serious is getting a coldsore while breastfeeding? I'm after getting one in the past 3 hours, prob due to the amount of sun I got in the past 2 days and prob run down from been on the clock 24 /7 breastfeeding, changing nappys, having dinner ready for the other fellow when he comes home for work ect... you know urself men have it so easy sometimes I wonder if I wasnt breastfeeding would be have got up for night feeds anyway!:mad:

    It's the Daily Mail that should be banned in my opinion....

    That poor baby was a freak incident, the chances are in the millions. Have you had coldsores before? If you haven't, it could be worth going to the doc to put your mind at ease. If you have, then mind yourself, treat the coldsore and avoid passing it onto baby. And I'm sure the other half could manage to do a few dinners for both of ye himself for a few days. You need your strength.

    I take Lysine (you get it in health food shops) when I feel one coming on, does the trick and stops it developing.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 41 Future Baby


    Had one two years ago, my lip blew out like one of them blow fish for 2 weeks!

    I dont normally fall for these stories in the Daily Mail, thats why I said Google should be banned. As for my other half making dinners for the next few days, I will tell u a story and it will make u laugh, he had a takeaway Pizza years ago and it was cold, so he said he'd heat it up under the grill for a few mins, he put the pizza in the pizza box under the grill and set the box on fire :D sometimes you wonder why all the top chefs are MEN!

    Prob go home to the Mammys for a few days, get some Mammy dinners and my little fellow will be spoilt rotten! Ah my other half is not really that bad, he did cut the grass and washed the car yesterday, but when it comes to house work, night time nappy changes he get a big fat "F" if you were grading him, but as my own mother said its half my own fault as I let him get away with it, as when I do decided to go on strike for a few days, I always give in and tidy up the place in the end.

    Yeah Im going to go to the doctors tomorrow if she is not too busy, if I have to pay 55euros to be told to use Zervix, I'll Scream, but at least its better than worrying about the worst case every!


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,617 ✭✭✭Cat Melodeon


    Thanks guys, glad to hear some of you have had success with the cup. I tried again tonight, same drama, she just will not/cannot suck. She takes a soother occasionally but even then she chews more than sucks. I'll check out cups tomorrow. Unfortunately gran lives in the UK so I can't get her to help before the actual day of the wedding. Pressure's on to make little madam independent by then!


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,339 ✭✭✭How Strange


    Babies are so clever and intuitive. We went away for our first night when my son was 5 months. We'd come through the sleep regression and I was exhausted. No one had ever minded him for more than a couple of hours never mind overnight and we were cosleeping.

    What did he do for his granny? He guzzled his 11pm bottle of ebm, slept through to 6am and cuddled up to her for a few more hours sleep. The next night he was back to his usual routine with me.


  • Registered Users Posts: 862 ✭✭✭red fraggle


    Red fraggle is the milk flowing freely when you hand express? If so you've probably cleared the blockage if not then its still blocked. If its still blocked get into a hot bath of you have one and keep expressing until the milk is flowing.

    My son had terrible wind one day at 10 weeks (caused by me eating hummus!) and I started to feel unwell that evening. I had mastitis in the first week so after the blocked duct I was always on the look out for both. A few times over the next few months I noticed a red patch (always on the same breast) and I'd take my son into bed and feed as much as we could for the night. It can happen so quickly if your little one isn't emptying the breast.


    seems to be grand now thanks!!!! and ive noticed any pain is always in the same breast!! wierd:rolleyes:


  • Registered Users Posts: 3,937 ✭✭✭implausible


    Babies are so clever and intuitive. We went away for our first night when my son was 5 months. We'd come through the sleep regression and I was exhausted. No one had ever minded him for more than a couple of hours never mind overnight and we were cosleeping.

    What did he do for his granny? He guzzled his 11pm bottle of ebm, slept through to 6am and cuddled up to her for a few more hours sleep. The next night he was back to his usual routine with me.

    I could have written that post How Strange! My wee man was the same with his granny - me worrying away and not a bother on His Highness! Babies will not let themselves starve.

    Cat, you're better off getting someone else to try the cup/bottle, while you're not in the area. Babies' boob radar is very strong!


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,992 ✭✭✭dublinlady


    Today I was on the train for a long return journey and on the way there I breast fed A no problem as there wasn't many ppl around but on the way back it was really busy and I just really didn't feel comfortable doing it. I couldn't bring expressed milk as was out for too long, I had an emergency carton of sma with me and a sterile bottle just incase - I've never given her formula before. Shes 6&1/2 wks old and for the last few weeks has been puking up ALOT of her feeds . I know she's keeping enough down as is gaining weight consistently. I don't think it's reflux really as its not every feed, just most! I use nipple shields as my nipples are too small and she can't latch on without them - this was advised my lactation consultant in the hosp. I've tried her on several occasions without them - she really just cannot latch on without them and I would have had to give up breast feeding a long time ago without them!
    When I gave her the formula she seemed to love it - and seemed so much happier after the feed - did her burps , only spat up a little and was so relaxed and happy afterwards - normally she seems uncomfortable! ( and I've tried gaviscon infant to no avail)
    I'm wondering is she getting too much air with the nipple shields? But then we give her a bottle of expressed milk every night and it's the same - lots of puking and wriggling!? So now I'm wondering about the consistency... The formula looked a fair bit thicker/ heavier than the breast milk, could it actually suit her better???
    I'm tempted to try formula again to see tho - I don't know what to do!


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,339 ✭✭✭How Strange


    dublinlady, you've done such an amazing job to get to 6.5 weeks and any breastfeeding mother knows its a tough 6 weeks but don't doubt yourself now. Honestly there's no way that formula which is mass produced in a factory is better for your baby than the milk your body creates for her. It's her perfect tailor made food.

    You're right formula is thicker and heavier so it overfills them and they are just like us after Christmas dinner; stuffed to the gills! Breastmilk is lighter and easier to digest so they need to feed more often.

    I think you've hit the nail on the head when you mentioned the nipple shields. That lactation consultant was talking bull when she said your nipples are too small. It's called breastfeeding not nipple feeding. The size of your nipples are not reflective of your ability to breastfeed. When you latch the baby on, as you know, the baby takes the breast into its mouth and the nipple goes to the back of the mouth.

    Would you contact a local la Leche league or Cuidiu counsellor? I'm suggesting those organisations because they're so highly trained and they will help you feed without nipple shields but also they're a free resource.

    Please don't doubt yourself now because you've done the hard work and you're about to turn a corner where it gets so much easier and it's really like your big reward. I'm 100% pro breastfeeding so I have to remind myself to temper my enthusiasm sometimes but I wouldn't recommend carrying cartons of formula if you intend to continue breastfeeding as slowly but surely you'll start using it more and more.

    I know how absolutely nerve wrecking feeding in public is so I'd suggest you look for a breastfeeding mother baby group in your area. It only takes a few times of doing it in public to get the hang of it do you aren't fumbling and once you do you'll be able to go anywhere without restrictions or stressing about feeding. I sy this as someone who'd never go topless on a beach so it's not that I'm especially confident drawing attention to myself.


  • Registered Users Posts: 482 ✭✭annamcmahon


    Dublinlady, if you live near Liffey Valley a group of us meet for coffee and mama to mama support and a chat in Starbucks every Thursday from 11-1pm. It really helped my confidence when feeding in public because I surrounded by other ladies feeding their babies. Feel free to pop along anytime if you like.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,992 ✭✭✭dublinlady


    Thanks how strange for all of your advice! I took it and phoned a cuidiu counsellor who spoke to me for 30 mins or so and was lovely and a great help!! She agrees that it's prob the shields causing so much wind and gave me tips on how to try to stop using them, haven't been brave enough to try yet but will! She gave me loads of advise about feeding in public with examples of where to go which was very helpful! She understood why I didn't feel comfortable in the particular situation yest and advised me to get a bottle cooler so I can bring expressed milk with me for trips where I think I can't brave it and understood that even with all the best intention not everyone has enough strength to brave it in every situation! But she did advise me how to overcome this by bringing expressed milk rather than formula. Don't get me wrong - I intend to breast feed in public discretely and think its good that ppl do - however I will never feel comfortable sitting surrounded by drunk male strangers who even smoke on the train they care so little!! There are times when I will be glad to have my bottle with me but in most cases I'll hopefully be bringing it home full!!
    It is tough at this stage - mainly cos my body is now over the surgery and in feeling ready to go out and about but she's feeding so much and for so long each time! But from what she said my baby may never speed up so I'll have to get used to it!!
    I do feel if I stopped breast feeding I'd really miss the closeness with my daughter - ESP now that she's becoming more alert and is realising its me attached to the boobs!!!! It's a lovely bond to have - and as you said its so natural it has to be best!
    Thanks again for your support - much appreciated :)

    Anna - thanks a mil, Liffey valley a fair bit out of my way but if I will look for a local group and if they aren't nice and friendly I'll be straight out to ya! Thanks again!!


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  • Registered Users Posts: 482 ✭✭annamcmahon


    It's great that you got to talk to someone so helpful Dublinlady. I know there is another group that meet in Ikea, either Cuidiu or Le Leche League.


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