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Favourite Simpsons Quote

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Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 1,604 ✭✭✭blondie83


    From one of the sunday episodes:

    Smithers - Sir maybe it would be possible to solve this without killing the little girl

    Monty Burns - Don't be ridiculous Smithers, non violence never solved anything

    There were a few good quotes in that episode but I can't think of them now.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,197 ✭✭✭Spalk0


    "i think i can work the Velocitator and the accelamatrix, hmmmmm!" - Mr Burns!


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,257 ✭✭✭SoupyNorman


    Zulu wrote:
    Homer - "butter up that bacon!"
    Homer - "bacon up that butter!"
    Bart - "...my heart hurts."


    Stupid Episode...


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 213 ✭✭Micheal Wittman


    Smithers:Sir, the townspeople see you as something of an ogar

    Mr.Burns: (shudders) I augh'da crush them and eat their bones

    :D:):D:)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 68 ✭✭spudster101


    Homer: No beer and no TV make homer something something.
    Marge: Go crazy?
    Homer: Dont mind if i do.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 783 ✭✭✭Skellington


    (alarm goes off)
    homer: ah, but i got up yesterday...


    (bart running past window dressed as cheerleader)
    principal skinner: oh no, looks like bart got into the pep closet.
    homer: looks like barts coming out of the pep closet...


  • Registered Users Posts: 17,727 ✭✭✭✭Sherifu


    Marge, what's the number for 911


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,093 ✭✭✭woosaysdan


    marge: your work called the said that since you didnt go in yesterday dont bother going in monday!
    homer: woohoo 5 day weekend


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 274 ✭✭adjodlo


    Sorry if its been said before but this one always cracked me up.

    Look Marge, you don't know what it's like -- I'm the one out there every day putting his ass on the line. And I'm not out of order! You're out of order! The whole freakin' system is out of order! You want the truth? You want the truth?! You can't HANDLE the truth! 'Cause when you reach over and put your hand into a pile of goo that was your best friend's face, you'll know what to do! Forget it, Marge, it's Chinatown!



    The code of the schoolyard, Marge! The rules that teach a boy to be a man. Let's see. Don't tattle. Always make fun of those different from you. Never say anything, unless you're sure everyone feels exactly the same way you do. What else...


    Stealing! How could you? Haven't you learned anything from that guy who gives those sermons at church? Captain what's-his-name? We live in a society of laws. Why do you think I took you to all those Police Academy movies? For fun? Well I didn't hear anybody laughing, did you?


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,440 ✭✭✭✭Piste


    Ralph: Mrs Hoover? I ate my worm can Iv'e another one?

    Mrs Hoover: No Ralph, there are no more worms. Now put your head on your desk and try to go asleep

    Ralph: Oh Boy! Sleep! That's where I'm a Viking!




    Cracks me up every time


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  • Registered Users Posts: 68,317 ✭✭✭✭seamus


    From the newer episodes (they're actually getting good):

    Homer: I'm in no condition to drive. Wait, I shouldn't listen to myself. I'm drunk!

    Homer: I'm gonna pull an all nighter for my daughter! MARGE! Go put on a pot of coffee! Drink it! And start making hamburgers!


  • Registered Users Posts: 261 ✭✭golden gal


    when the weight of the world has got you down and you wanna end your life.something something a dead end job and problems with the wife. well dont throw in the towel cuz theres a place right down block where you can drink your miseries away. at flaming moes. lets all go to flaming moes. where liquer in a mug can warm you like a hug , happiness is just a flaming mug away. Classic!!!!!


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,093 ✭✭✭woosaysdan


    golden gal wrote:
    when the weight of the world has got you down and you wanna end your life.something something a dead end job and problems with the wife. well dont throw in the towel cuz theres a place right down block where you can drink your miseries away. at flaming moes. lets all go to flaming moes. where liquer in a mug can warm you like a hug , happiness is just a flaming mug away. Classic!!!!!
    LOL excellent


  • Registered Users Posts: 7,626 ✭✭✭smoke.me.a.kipper


    "did ya hear that boy, the carnie code!"


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,263 ✭✭✭Caesar_Bojangle


    Let the bears pay the bear tax, I pay the Homer tax.



    I'm a white male, age 18 to 49. Everyone listens to me, no matter how dumb my suggestions are.


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,440 ✭✭✭✭Piste


    Bart to Milhouse: 'Ewwwwwww you kissed a girl! That is soooooo Gay!'

    [Stone flies through Mr. Burns' office window]
    Look Smithers, a bird has become petrified and lost its sense of direction.

    Principal Skinner: I have caught word that a child is using his imagination and I've come to put a stop to it.

    Well the simpsons are on now so I'll be back with some more quotes.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 442 ✭✭Hello Kitty


    To many to choose from:

    Homer: "Dear Lord: The gods have been good to me. For the first time in my life, everything is absolutely perfect just the way it is. So here's the deal: You freeze everything the way it is, and I won't ask for anything more. If that is OK, please give me absolutely no sign. OK, deal. In gratitude, I present you this offering of cookies and milk. If you want me to eat them for you, give me no sign. Thy will be done."


  • Registered Users Posts: 6,810 ✭✭✭DRakE


    Colonel Hap Hapablap: Did somoebody say.. boxkites?

    Bart: No!

    Martin: "The common boxkite was orignally used as a means of drying wet string"


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,598 ✭✭✭cashback


    Kent Brockman: Tonight, on Eyewitness News: a man who's been in a coma for 23 years wakes up.
    Man: Do Sonny and Cher still have that stupid show?
    Kent: No, uh, she won an Oscar, and he's a Congressman.
    Man: Good night! [turns over and dies]


  • Registered Users Posts: 17,727 ✭✭✭✭Sherifu


    Joe Banks... 82 years young has come to this pond every day for the past 17 years, to feed the ducks. But last month, Joe made a discovery... the ducks... were gone! Some say the ducks went to Canada, others say Toronto. And some people think, that joe used to sit down there, near those ducks. But it could be, that there is just no room in this modern world, for an old man... and... his ducks...


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  • Registered Users Posts: 1,598 ✭✭✭cashback


    another good one:

    Homer: I learned this from a movie I saw about a bus that has to SPEED around the city, keeping its SPEED above 50, and if its SPEED drops, it would explode. I think it was called: "The Bus That Couldn't Stop."


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 144 ✭✭Aava


    "Suspect is driving a... car, of some sort."


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 704 ✭✭✭PeadarofAodh


    I Like-a to chew!! :D

    I wonder how many times I've used this phrase randomly for the past year...


  • Registered Users Posts: 56 ✭✭lazernuts


    Bart: I'm going to get the dog back!
    Homer: [off-camera, distant] The good dog or the bad dog?
    Bart: The bad dog.
    Homer: Ah good.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,767 ✭✭✭Hugh Hefner


    "Bah! I deride your truth handeling abilities!!" - Sidshow Bob. :D

    That quote has a lot of history with me.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,327 ✭✭✭Nasty_Girl


    Booberella about Mr Burns when he took over the media
    "His heart is as big as my BOOOOBS!"
    Kent Brockman: "Well we'll have to agree to ...agree on this one then"
    Booberella : ".....BOOOOOOOOBS!"

    I thought it was funny
    or this by kent brockman
    "We're coming to you live and to prove we're live.. P*NIS!!"


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,440 ✭✭✭✭Piste


    Kent Brockman: And I for one welcome our new ant overlords and remind them that as a member of the media I would be an invalubale source for rounding up people to work in their underground sugar caves


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,875 ✭✭✭Seraphina


    the following tale of alien encounter is true
    by which i mean, false.
    they're all lies, but they're entertaining lies,
    and isn't that, in the end, the real truth?
    the answer, is no.


  • Moderators, Education Moderators Posts: 9,570 Mod ✭✭✭✭mayordenis


    "i got it from my film with Rob Schnieder 'my baby's a fat ugly man" - wolfcastle


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  • Registered Users Posts: 3,952 ✭✭✭mp3guy


    "Hey chief, can hold hold my gun sideways. it looks so cool!" - Cop (i forget his name)
    "You can do whatever you want birthday boy" - Chief Wiggum

    "Ok, here we are boys, 123 fake street" - Chief Wiggum

    "No, you must have the wrong number, this is, 91...2" - Chief Wiggum

    "Has my crate of pixie sticks come in yet?" - Dr. Hibbert
    "No" - Apu
    "DAMN IT!!! When they come in you call me at this number!" - Dr. Hibbert
    "Hm, 911" - Apu

    "Note to Marge, 'Get Out!'" - Motherloving sugar corp. Owner


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