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Poetry Megathread

  • 29-03-2012 2:40pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 11,763 ✭✭✭✭


    This post has been deleted.


«13

Comments

  • Moderators, Arts Moderators Posts: 34,941 Mod ✭✭✭✭pickarooney


    Two threads but no poems. This is the Creative Writing forum where anyone can post poems and specify if they want feedback or not.
    What are you waiting for exactly?


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,763 ✭✭✭✭Crann na Beatha


    This post has been deleted.


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,763 ✭✭✭✭Crann na Beatha


    This post has been deleted.


  • Registered Users Posts: 24 supp


    nice


  • Registered Users Posts: 43 crazyhorsecowle


    A Bitch and It's world.

    I hail from nothing and I've nothing to give,
    I hail from nothing and in nothing I live,
    I hail for forgiveness and I have broken your heart,
    I hail from a love lost, it was lost from the start.

    I was bred from a madness in conclusion a sadness,
    an every day sadness of a Bitch and it's World,
    And this foregone illusion can't stop my conclusion,
    My conclusion that nothing breeds nothing at all.

    Society's just broken down
    And all it's walls come tumbling down,
    And the Heaven's Lord's have closed their gates,
    And cooperate to coordinate on how to seal our fate,
    Like a delegation of politicians who must decree our faith.

    To you I'll stick my finger up
    And give to you this hollow cup,
    And toast to your brilliance, your throne and your crown,
    With your ever present vultures that strip us and rape us,
    Only death can now save us,
    And deliver us down.

    I was bred from a madness, in conclusion a sadness,
    An every day sadness of a Bitch and it's World,
    And this foregone illusion can't stop my conclusion,
    My conclusion that nothing breeds nothing at all.

    Enable hope to take first place,
    Amongst this deluded degenerate race,
    But pity us not, for here pity's lost,
    Like a flower in December, fallen victim to frost.


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  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,831 Mod ✭✭✭✭Insect Overlord


    Here's one that seems to be picking up a few views in the ol' poetry blog.

    Closing Time

    The nightclub undimmed all its lights
    At half past two and sent us packing,
    Allowing only time to search for coats
    And exclamations of another job well done;
    Another personal best for which prevention,
    The next step, would out-weigh cure.

    Then eight diverged to five and three
    Outside the shining kebab shop door,
    Allowing time for smiles, mischievous grins
    And exclamations from a Donor-virgin’s lips;
    Add a new favourite to the menu list!
    Then back outside into the rain

    To search after the other five
    And make up eight for the wet walk home.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,364 ✭✭✭golden lane


    ah!, such is life, the man declared
    so much around, but nothing shared
    can we not hold out our hand
    and share with all, from this green land

    why people have, more than their shares
    and those without, with forlorn stares
    why one can have more, than their fill
    then leave to others, in their will

    is today, not hungers need
    is life much better, filled with greed
    and one day will those not repent
    what's on this earth, is heaven sent


  • Registered Users Posts: 43 crazyhorsecowle


    Why a bed is more than just somewhere you sleep....

    You are mostly conceived in a bed

    You give birth in a bed

    You dream in your sleep and HEY PRESTO!!!
    You sleep in your bed.

    You make love in a bed (hopefully often!!)

    Your bed is what holds you when you are sick
    And releases you when you are well,

    And when you die
    You hopefully by the grace of God
    Die peacefully in your bed.

    So enjoy your bed!

    Written whilst sitting on my bed! Hee Hee!!!


  • Registered Users Posts: 50 ✭✭Whelpling


    Here's one that seems to be picking up a few views in the ol' poetry blog.

    Closing Time

    The nightclub undimmed all its lights
    At half past two and sent us packing,
    Allowing only time to search for coats
    And exclamations of another job well done;
    Another personal best for which prevention,
    The next step, would out-weigh cure.

    Then eight diverged to five and three
    Outside the shining kebab shop door,
    Allowing time for smiles, mischievous grins
    And exclamations from a Donor-virgin’s lips;
    Add a new favourite to the menu list!
    Then back outside into the rain

    To search after the other five
    And make up eight for the wet walk home.

    Love this.

    I think it's 'Doner' - but that's pretty irrelevant. Still love it.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 21 tubby trucker


    Mindless Minds,
    Mind Moronic Morons,
    Minding Mindless Minds.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 219 ✭✭insight_man


    Aquila wrote: »
    Tempest

    A whirlpool of deceit:a never-ending cycle ensues
    Hidden storms over calm waters
    Nothing is, as it seems
    Streams of negativity flow
    Into waters ill at ease

    Hidden feelings reappearing
    The eye of the inner tempest shearing,
    Lone gone the coat of love
    Bare and naked fearing

    Torrid winds roar, cruel waves bash against the shore
    Eroding ones soul further into obscurity
    Darkness falls over troubled waters
    The mournful hymn of the soulless
    Could be heard all round
    In this boundless sea of turmoil.

    Very good. I read into it that this comes from some personal experience. Not prying but most good poetry comes from our life experiences.

    Any suggestions,critique most welcome

    Very good. I think it comes from personal experience. Not prying, but most good poetry comes from personal experience


  • Registered Users Posts: 219 ✭✭insight_man


    A Bitch and It's world.

    I hail from nothing and I've nothing to give,
    I hail from nothing and in nothing I live,
    I hail for forgiveness and I have broken your heart,
    I hail from a love lost, it was lost from the start.

    I was bred from a madness in conclusion a sadness,
    an every day sadness of a Bitch and it's World,
    And this foregone illusion can't stop my conclusion,
    My conclusion that nothing breeds nothing at all.

    Society's just broken down
    And all it's walls come tumbling down,
    And the Heaven's Lord's have closed their gates,
    And cooperate to coordinate on how to seal our fate,
    Like a delegation of politicians who must decree our faith.

    To you I'll stick my finger up
    And give to you this hollow cup,
    And toast to your brilliance, your throne and your crown,
    With your ever present vultures that strip us and rape us,
    Only death can now save us,
    And deliver us down.

    I was bred from a madness, in conclusion a sadness,
    An every day sadness of a Bitch and it's World,
    And this foregone illusion can't stop my conclusion,
    My conclusion that nothing breeds nothing at all.

    Enable hope to take first place,
    Amongst this deluded degenerate race,
    But pity us not, for here pity's lost,
    Like a flower in December, fallen victim to frost.

    Very dark work. Fatalistic even. Good play with words and well written.


  • Registered Users Posts: 219 ✭✭insight_man


    ah!, such is life, the man declared
    so much around, but nothing shared
    can we not hold out our hand
    and share with all, from this green land

    why people have, more than their shares
    and those without, with forlorn stares
    why one can have more, than their fill
    then leave to others, in their will

    is today, not hungers need
    is life much better, filled with greed
    and one day will those not repent
    what's on this earth, is heaven sent

    Really like this!


  • Registered Users Posts: 43 crazyhorsecowle


    Very dark work. Fatalistic even. Good play with words and well written.

    Thank you so much for your comment,it means a lot.
    Thank you also for the new word fatalistic.I looked it up,very interesting.

    I never have an idea before I write,it usually stems from a word or feeling or tune that gives me a rhythm for the way the words progress.
    I am sometimes surprised myself of the way they map out and the places and feelings I transport myself to whilst writing.


    This is my first time ever putting up my words for people to see in a specific place designated to writing,so I was very nervous in doing so.
    I don't mind whether people like or dislike it but at least by putting it up it gives people the chance to find out.

    I love reading peoples words ,and wish there were more to read on this creative writing section.

    Thanks again and I hope to get the opportunity to speak with you again.
    Fatalistic.....love it.


  • Registered Users Posts: 219 ✭✭insight_man


    Thank you so much for your comment,it means a lot.
    Thank you also for the new word fatalistic.I looked it up,very interesting.

    I never have an idea before I write,it usually stems from a word or feeling or tune that gives me a rhythm for the way the words progress.
    I am sometimes surprised myself of the way they map out and the places and feelings I transport myself to whilst writing.


    This is my first time ever putting up my words for people to see in a specific place designated to writing,so I was very nervous in doing so.
    I don't mind whether people like or dislike it but at least by putting it up it gives people the chance to find out.

    I love reading peoples words ,and wish there were more to read on this creative writing section.

    Thanks again and I hope to get the opportunity to speak with you again.
    Fatalistic.....love it.

    Like you I love words. Used in the right way they can make us laugh, cry and tug at our heart strings, cause anger and conflict. Very powerful really. If you have other pieces of work you want to share I'd love to read them.


  • Registered Users Posts: 43 crazyhorsecowle


    Like you I love words. Used in the right way they can make us laugh, cry and tug at our heart strings, cause anger and conflict. Very powerful really. If you have other pieces of work you want to share I'd love to read them.

    Cheers,I will do and likewise if you have also.
    I don't write as often as I used, or would like to.

    I would absolutely love to do spoken word,I have it all in my head and is unlike anything I write, but I need to translate it to paper and then into physical emotion which should be an interesting experience!!!
    Then of course I have to find the balls to actually do it,the rest is easy in comparison to getting up and doing it.

    Ah maybe next week!!!
    Keep in touch and Thanks a million.


  • Registered Users Posts: 43 crazyhorsecowle


    Hail and thunder,
    snow and ice
    began to whither
    our paradise.

    No yeast to harvest
    no bread to turn
    few are the forests
    and no fires burn.

    Food so scarce
    lengths well over run
    cattle all starve
    no milk to churn.

    "Plague is upon us"
    The people now cry.
    "If god cannot save us
    Why even try".

    Children unhappy
    no smiles can they keep
    nothing but hunger
    to lull them to sleep.

    "Why has this happened
    what have we done?
    Deliver us from evil
    thy will be done.

    There goes my family
    I wave them goodbye,
    they have plenty of company
    on the cart where they lye.

    I know I'm not far behind you
    but carry on,
    try as I must,

    Ashes to Ashes,
    Dust to Dust.


  • Registered Users Posts: 43 crazyhorsecowle


    I fell asleep in a sea of dreams surrounded
    by verse,
    Crumpled up I lay with ease.

    Shut your eyes it takes time to rest and unwind.

    There's no need to worry,
    Your o.k.

    Relax ,deep breaths.

    Maybe you should lye down your looking a little peakish,
    Your starting to get very pale.

    You alright?
    take a seat,
    deep breaths.

    "BYE,BYE"
    I'll just drop and lye....
    for a moment.

    I'm gone,
    far from the ground I lay upon
    and deep beneath the atmosphere,

    CHAOS.

    I pay no heed as I lay here unconscious.

    "WAKE UP"
    "WAKE UP"

    AND BREATH.


  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,831 Mod ✭✭✭✭Insect Overlord


    Some Day We Have To Share This Sight Together

    You cannot walk these roads with me tonight,
    And tomorrow morning feels too far away,
    And so, instead, I force my hands to write
    A pale impression of the Milky Way.

    Every star that can be viewed by mortal sight
    Carries over Moher’s cliffs and waves
    A lonely message that I hope just might
    Redeem my absence over summer days.

    And if a man had wings to give him flight
    I’d take a leap from castle walls to say
    That Heaven’s quilt of jewels holds no light
    To match the diamonds in your smiling face.

    I promise that this sight we’ll one day share
    As an embracing, starlight-gazing pair.


  • Registered Users Posts: 43 crazyhorsecowle


    Some Day We Have To Share This Sight Together

    You cannot walk these roads with me tonight,
    And tomorrow morning feels too far away,
    And so, instead, I force my hands to write
    A pale impression of the Milky Way.

    Holy ****,did you write that? all of it I mean?

    Now that is impressive,very rare occasion indeed,
    stunning.
    Thank you so much for sharing whether yours or not.
    I felt it as I read it.
    Nice one.
    Think I'll read it again.......and again.


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  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,831 Mod ✭✭✭✭Insect Overlord


    Holy ****,did you write that? all of it I mean?

    Now that is impressive,very rare occasion indeed,
    stunning.
    Thank you so much for sharing whether yours or not.
    I felt it as I read it.
    Nice one.
    Think I'll read it again.......and again.

    Thanks! :)

    Yup, that's all my own work. Written while exiled in the Arann Islands a few years ago.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,364 ✭✭✭golden lane


    Thanks! :)

    Yup, that's all my own work. Written while exiled in the Arann Islands a few years ago.

    time not wasted then.......


  • Moderators, Social & Fun Moderators, Society & Culture Moderators Posts: 30,831 Mod ✭✭✭✭Insect Overlord


    time not wasted then.......

    Not entirely anyway. :) It's funny what ideas can come to you on the way home after supervising a céilí. :pac:


  • Registered Users Posts: 52 ✭✭DaneScott


    Filleted a moth this evening.

    Horrific really. Poor thing still breathing.

    Still though, a curiosity had besieged me, on seeing

    Another being, protruding from a crude opening

    Below its torso, while poking it under scope.

    I was hoping to get a closer look,

    To understand what was unfolding.



    What it took, was to lightly trim

    Off the limbs. Whittle away the wings.

    Other such deplorable things.

    The precision needed to succeed in

    Removing the unwanted pieces,

    Attempting to reveal its species,

    Left no room to consider the moths feelings.

    I crushed its head with a tweezers.



    Most likely a parasitic creature.

    I took pictures. Spent hours observing its features.

    With no success, My mind digressed,

    I began thinking of sleeping.



    I decided to keep it.

    To see if tomorrow we could tease it

    Into another suitor.

    Though only to explore its nature.

    I swear, never for pleasure.



    But it died. I knew it would.

    And all night, I dreamt moths ruled the world.

    How about this?
    I really liked Closing Time. Reads nice. :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 43 crazyhorsecowle


    DaneScott wrote: »
    Filleted a moth this evening.

    Horrific really. Poor thing still breathing.

    Still though, a curiosity had besieged me, on seeing

    Another being, protruding from a crude opening

    Below its torso, while poking it under scope.

    I was hoping to get a closer look,

    To understand what was unfolding.

    Hee Hee!!!

    Class, well done. the imagination and words combined,a powerful combination.
    Fair play for posting.
    I'D LOVE TO HEAR MORE.Cheers pal.


  • Registered Users Posts: 11,763 ✭✭✭✭Crann na Beatha


    This post has been deleted.


  • Registered Users Posts: 43 crazyhorsecowle


    Aquila wrote: »
    Love?

    The funny thing is that I will never know how it reads in your head or sound ,but I have found a lovely broken rhythm in speaking it out in mine.
    I really enjoyed it ,thanks.

    I have a couple of lines that I thought of a long time ago and had always planned on basing a poem around them,

    ( it's dark in here,
    too dark to see how dark it really is)

    Reading your poem reminded me I had yet to do it,so thanks for bringing it back!!!
    Be great to hear more.
    Thanks.


  • Registered Users Posts: 274 ✭✭PurpleBee


    DaneScott wrote: »
    Filleted a moth this evening.

    Incredibly good first line.


  • Moderators, Arts Moderators Posts: 34,941 Mod ✭✭✭✭pickarooney


    DaneScott wrote: »
    Filleted a moth this evening.

    Horrific really. Poor thing still breathing.

    Cracking poem. I loved the meter and the content.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 52 ✭✭DaneScott


    Seriously, some of the more encouraging things I've ever heard. Thanks guys. I'll fall asleep smiling tonight. It actually means a lot. :)


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