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Ridiculous Workplace Rules, Policies, Requests, PC, Initiatives, etc.

  • 14-08-2012 5:33pm
    #1
    Registered Users Posts: 224 ✭✭babymanval


    Hi all,

    Workplace policies/procedures/rules/directives from management etc. can often be ridiculous, counter-productively nonsensical at times. However I heard the most ridiculous one today. A friend of mine texted me at lunch to tell me about a farcical 30 minute meeting that she had to sit through:

    She got an email requesting her to attend a meeting with her line manager this morning. It transpired that the purpose of this was to discuss any support that she may need for "any addictions that [she] might be suffering with"... The catalyst for this? Her manager had observed her taking three, rather than the recommended two tablets (for her Katie Taylor homecoming-inspired hangover). Furthermore, the manager observed that she had 2 packets of Solpadeine on her desk, "in full view". She came away from the meeting with some literature on addiction agencies, and a heartfelt reassurance that the management have a staunch policy of standing behind employees where they need support.

    It got me to thinking; I've heard of some management requests/policies that would make you want to rip your hair out. They always put me in mind of the film "Office Space" (TPS reports etc). My experiences have been:

    - A request that I wear black slacks, instead of the very (very, very, very) dark blue/navy ones I was wearing, in a telesales job, with zero contact with anyone, ever.
    - The (quickly boycotted) organisation of separate male and female Xmas "parties", so "as not to encourage workplace romance/indiscretions leading to awkwardness/disruption in the team".

    Anyone else?


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Comments

  • Banned (with Prison Access) Posts: 32,865 ✭✭✭✭MagicMarker


    My employer doesn't allow fisting.


  • Registered Users Posts: 63 ✭✭The Amazing Spiderman


    babymanval wrote: »
    Hi all,

    Workplace policies/procedures/rules/directives from management etc. can often be ridiculous, counter-productively nonsensical at times. However I heard the most ridiculous one today. A friend of mine texted me at lunch to tell me about a farcical 30 minute meeting that she had to sit through:

    She got an email requesting her to attend a meeting with her line manager this morning. It transpired that the purpose of this was to discuss any support that she may need for "any addictions that [she] might be suffering with"... The catalyst for this? Her manager had observed her taking three, rather than the recommended two tablets (for her Katie Taylor homecoming-inspired hangover). Furthermore, the manager observed that she had 2 packets of Solpadeine on her desk, "in full view". She came away from the meeting with some literature on addiction agencies, and a heartfelt reassurance that the management have a staunch policy of standing behind employees where they need support.



    Anyone else?
    Sure that sounds like a bit of an overreaction. But at least they mean well


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,818 ✭✭✭Lyaiera


    My employer prefers we only have a few drinks while working and keep the heavy drinking for when we've knocked off.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,559 ✭✭✭Millicent


    So, your friend has a hangover on a workday, takes more than the prescribed dose of OTC medicine, and has two boxes of a highly addictive, tightly controlled and usually prescription-only codeine painkiller on her desk? I wonder why her boss might have thought she had difficulty with substance abuse problems. :eek:


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,004 ✭✭✭Cassidy28


    It seems fairly okay to me.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,184 ✭✭✭marshbaboon


    I was brought into a managers office & told I "wasn't friendly enough & needed to spend more time talking to co-workers".


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,033 ✭✭✭mauzo


    I was brought into a managers office & told I "wasn't friendly enough & needed to spend more time talking to co-workers".

    I was told that too, so I started screwing half the staff


  • Posts: 8,647 Leilani Damp Roughneck


    Millicent wrote: »
    So, your friend has a hangover on a workday, takes more than the prescribed dose of OTC medicine, and has two boxes of a highly addictive, tightly controlled and usually prescription-only codeine painkiller on her desk? I wonder why her boss might have thought she had difficulty with substance abuse problems. :eek:
    What's this now?


  • Registered Users Posts: 966 ✭✭✭some random drunk


    In my ex-girlfriend's office they were only permitted to drink bottles of water at their desks (including carbonated, flavoured water). She had a bottle of 7up one day and was given out to and warned not do it again.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 5,455 ✭✭✭Where To


    I love my boss, he's the bestest boss in the world ever, very handsome also.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 4,559 ✭✭✭Millicent


    I was brought into a managers office & told I "wasn't friendly enough & needed to spend more time talking to co-workers".
    syndeyfife wrote: »
    I was told that too, so I started screwing half the staff

    I got told I was talking too much to customers. In a retail job. Because I was making chit chat while scanning through shopping. How the fuck is that a bad thing? :confused:


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 7,293 ✭✭✭1ZRed


    syndeyfife wrote: »
    I was told that too, so I started screwing half the staff

    Yeah like you needed a reason :rolleyes: :p


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,818 ✭✭✭Lyaiera


    What's this now?

    It's no longer over the counter. I think the pharmacists have a little leeway over handing it out though.


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,559 ✭✭✭Millicent


    What's this now?

    Solpadeine is ridiculously hard to get now. Same rules as that for Nurofen Plus cos of the codeine in it.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,004 ✭✭✭Cassidy28


    syndeyfife wrote: »
    I was told that too, so I started screwing half the staff

    Where they any good?


  • Registered Users Posts: 10,572 ✭✭✭✭brummytom


    I had to do some training at work last week, Health & Safety and some Fire Safety thing.

    Supervisor told me, 'They're multiple choice so it doesn't matter if you get them wrong, press back and click another one until you get it right'.


    Really useful training there.

    Then yesterday I had to see the manager for an 'appraisal'. I'd never done one before so I said 'ok, do I just answer a few questions?'. He said, 'no, I've done that for you. Just sign here, here and on the next page. Bye'.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,033 ✭✭✭mauzo


    Cassidy28 wrote: »
    syndeyfife wrote: »
    I was told that too, so I started screwing half the staff

    Where they any good?

    Not really, ended up going out with my supervisor until I left :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,598 ✭✭✭cashback


    My manager told me once that she didn't hear enough of a 'smile in my voice', when talking to customers on the phone.


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,052 ✭✭✭Matt_Trakker


    Was told I had to improve my handwriting for the menu board, I told him if that's all he had to complain about his restaurant was doing just grand. Shut him up so it did.


  • Registered Users Posts: 2,129 ✭✭✭LenaClaire


    One of my first jobs we were only allowed to go to the toilets at 10:15 or 3:15 and we weren't allowed to talk to each other except during lunch which was from 12 - 12:45.

    At the end of the day we had to turn off our computers at 4:50 and count the orders we had entered and give the manager a hand written note with our count. We then had to sit silently at our desks until 5.

    I quit after 3 weeks.


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  • Registered Users Posts: 4,831 ✭✭✭RayCon


    We we're sent on a 2 day Diversity training program. It was taught by 2 American black guys. At the end of day 1, as our "homework", we were asked to look for examples of discrimination (on TV that night, out socialising - wherever) and report back the next day.

    That night I noticed the MOBO awards on TV and thought "good example".

    I mentioned it as my example the next day and they hadn't heard of the ceremony. So I went on to explain what it was etc. They absolutely refused to accept it as a valid example of discrimination. I tried to argue the point but they told me they had heard enough and moved on.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,515 ✭✭✭zcorpian88


    cashback wrote: »
    My manager told me once that she didn't hear enough of a 'smile in my voice', when talking to customers on the phone.

    "Hear enough of a smile" wtf does that mean? Unusual way of putting it. She could have just said more enthusiasm in the voice. But really I wouldn't care as long as the service was nice and helpful :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 515 ✭✭✭Supraman


    When working in retail , I was once told I spent too much time talking to customers by a regional manager . Bizarre as store manager always asked me to spend as much time as possible with customers . Zara (clothing store) the wonderful pursuant of this policy .


  • Posts: 8,647 Leilani Damp Roughneck


    Lyaiera wrote: »
    It's no longer over the counter. I think the pharmacists have a little leeway over handing it out though.

    Yeah, so it's a P medication like in the uk. Thought Ireland had gone crazy and made it prescription only.


  • Registered Users Posts: 8,155 ✭✭✭Wompa1


    Worked in a place where I had to go to a customer service training day complete with walking around shaking hands while making eye contact with one another and drawing a picture of examples of good customer service....

    In my current place of work no cursing, casual Friday means less formal rather than casual, you are required to do things for your community and it's included in your yearly review. Oh we have TPS reports and as of tomorrow I will have 9 bosses. I beat him by 1!! woooo!

    Also worked in a place where we were told not to take things back that were damaged by the person, they'd always demand to see a manager who would give them what they want and make the staff look and feel like crap

    Returns policy was to allow returns if in good quality, even if they didn't have a receipt. Queue 'people' taking things off the shelves, bringing them to the counter and getting store credit


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 4,199 ✭✭✭Shryke


    Having to wear black slacks as and black shoes was one. I won't go into detail but completely unnecessary.

    I swear to God this is true, slashing everyone's hours with the idea that putting people on the bread line would encourage harder work.

    Was asked to sign a dodgy backdated contract.

    Not being given payslips for weeks and then being given them all at once. The excuse was that they hadn't come down from head office yet.

    Reducing staff and hours while expecting twice the workload to be completed. Vague threats of getting other people to do the job if you can't. Being called up to the office and given out to for this type of stuff.

    Some people being sent on the same training course more than once while others not at all. If you weren't sent on the course you were probably going to be let go once your contract was up.

    Staff were given warnings if they didn't perform well in the mystery shopper. Anyone familiar with retail will know what this is.

    Management were encouraged to stab each other in the back to get ahead. The place bred incompetence.

    Bringing people in for 4 hour shifts (part of the hour cutting) and expecting miracles.

    No training given to new staff or new management. Just told to go to work.

    Giving out to night pack staff for not doing enough even though everyone was flat out all night trying to get everything absolutely perfect.

    ^All the same place. I no longer work there. I have never encountered such incompetence, ignorance and malicious intent before or since.
    It's worth pointing out the insane pressure that management would inflict on regular employees. You would think it was Wall Street with millions on the line. Just awful treatment of everyone. It would have been an alright place if not for that.


  • Registered Users Posts: 20 supernature


    We've just been issued with a dress code banning all sorts of things including ties with sports team logos on them and flip flops. Two things I don't own and had no desire to wear until this message.

    Oh and 'short' mini skirts are banned too, so that makes long mini skirts okay?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,635 ✭✭✭eth0


    If someone wants to order something like a pack of surface mount resistors no matter how cheap it is for bureaucratic reasons a letter has to be printed and sent off to where ever the company is based. If you want something fast you have to hassle the department that does this to also send an email. The letter then mentions the email and that it isn't a duplicate purchase order.

    This is the kind of carry on your household charge (if you were stupid enough to pay it) and your new increased college fees are being used for


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 394 ✭✭RaRaRasputin


    Office administrators...in my previous job we had a crazy one.
    She'd ring maintenance to get them to open a window for her when she had put barred her way to it with boxes, chairs and other stuff.

    Confidential waste to be shredded was supposed to be alphabetically sorted of course.


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  • Closed Accounts Posts: 2,635 ✭✭✭eth0


    Wompa1 wrote: »
    Oh we have TPS reports and as of tomorrow I will have 9 bosses. I beat him by 1!! woooo!

    What exactly does a TPS report contain?


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