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(UK) Vicar hospitalised with potato up his Bum

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Comments

  • Registered Users Posts: 11,569 ✭✭✭✭ProudDUB


    At least the spud didn't have claws. ;)

    Asked my old restaurant boss once what was the worst/best/funniest excuse he heard for an employee not coming into work. He said it was a waiter calling and saying that he couldn't come in as he'd been gerbiling the night before and his ass was cut to ribbons. Cue me looking mucho puzzled as to what he was talking about. :confused:

    Turns out it is putting a gerbil into a sock, tying a knot in it and then shoving it up your bum. Apparently, the gerbils to-ing and fro-ing in the sock trying to escape gets the business done in the pleasure department.

    Only thing is, this idiot neglected to trim the claws of the poor wee gerbil before he sent him on the ride of a lifetime.

    As an employer, it would tend to stand out from the typical " the my dog ate my homework " type of excuses that they are used to hearing wouldn't it? :D


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,705 ✭✭✭Johro


    I wonder did they send the spud to the kitchen?
    I mean, with the recession and all..


  • Registered Users Posts: 4,705 ✭✭✭Johro


    Potato: 'It was horrible, just horrible... I.. I don't even... L-leave me alone!'
    (in an interview for the Sun).


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 6 Wosserwoman


    its better him getting action from vegetables than young children :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 55,431 ✭✭✭✭Mr E


    http://www.oddee.com/_media/imgs/articles2/a97933_penispotato.JPG

    (May be NSFW from a distance - up close, it's a potato) :o


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  • Registered Users Posts: 2,484 ✭✭✭The Snipe


    In the words of System of a Down.... PULL THE POTATOE OUT OF YOUR ARSE!


    But seriously I guess he took it too far when he heard the term, "Straining the spuds"


  • Registered Users Posts: 74 ✭✭shancoduff


    ProudDUB wrote: »
    At least the spud didn't have claws. ;)

    Asked my old restaurant boss once what was the worst/best/funniest excuse he heard for an employee not coming into work. He said it was a waiter calling and saying that he couldn't come in as he'd been gerbiling the night before and his ass was cut to ribbons. Cue me looking mucho puzzled as to what he was talking about. :confused:

    Turns out it is putting a gerbil into a sock, tying a knot in it and then shoving it up your bum. Apparently, the gerbils to-ing and fro-ing in the sock trying to escape gets the business done in the pleasure department.

    Only thing is, this idiot neglected to trim the claws of the poor wee gerbil before he sent him on the ride of a lifetime.

    As an employer, it would tend to stand out from the typical " the my dog ate my homework " type of excuses that they are used to hearing wouldn't it? :D

    You must feel honoured to have worked with Stephen Lynch :P


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,477 ✭✭✭Hootanany


    ProudDUB wrote: »
    At least the spud didn't have claws. ;)

    Asked my old restaurant boss once what was the worst/best/funniest excuse he heard for an employee not coming into work. He said it was a waiter calling and saying that he couldn't come in as he'd been gerbiling the night before and his ass was cut to ribbons. Cue me looking mucho puzzled as to what he was talking about. :confused:

    Turns out it is putting a gerbil into a sock, tying a knot in it and then shoving it up your bum. Apparently, the gerbils to-ing and fro-ing in the sock trying to escape gets the business done in the pleasure department.

    Only thing is, this idiot neglected to trim the claws of the poor wee gerbil before he sent him on the ride of a lifetime.

    As an employer, it would tend to stand out from the typical " the my dog ate my homework " type of excuses that they are used to hearing wouldn't it? :D

    I heard you need a bit of Wavin pipe to do this.


  • Registered Users Posts: 15,134 ✭✭✭✭Oat23


    *Frank Costanza voice*

    Million-to-one shot doc, million-to-one...


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