Advertisement
If you have a new account but are having problems posting or verifying your account, please email us on hello@boards.ie for help. Thanks :)
Hello all! Please ensure that you are posting a new thread or question in the appropriate forum. The Feedback forum is overwhelmed with questions that are having to be moved elsewhere. If you need help to verify your account contact hello@boards.ie

Trans Advice - Question and Concerns

189101113

Comments

  • Moderators, Computer Games Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 19,240 Mod ✭✭✭✭L.Jenkins


    Someone else may know better, but you could always try electrolysis.


  • Registered Users Posts: 219 ✭✭WantToBeRose


    Quick question regarding legal documents.

    Is there anything I should be looking to change or apply for before I begin transition? Or is it alright to wait until I choose to live full time, or near it?


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,229 ✭✭✭deirdre_dub


    Quick question regarding legal documents.

    Is there anything I should be looking to change or apply for before I begin transition? Or is it alright to wait until I choose to live full time, or near it?
    I'd leave the legal side of it alone until you are ready to go full-time. Once you do your deed poll, for instance, it becomes illegal for you to use your male name. So things could get awkward really quickly if you aren't ready to go full-time.


  • Registered Users Posts: 219 ✭✭WantToBeRose


    Thanks again Deirdre. Just wanted to see if there was anything I could be doing. So tired of waiting at this point.


  • Moderators, Computer Games Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 19,240 Mod ✭✭✭✭L.Jenkins


    Thanks again Deirdre. Just wanted to see if there was anything I could be doing. So tired of waiting at this point.

    I understand how you feel sweetie.


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 1,229 ✭✭✭deirdre_dub


    Thanks again Deirdre. Just wanted to see if there was anything I could be doing. So tired of waiting at this point.
    There is tons to do (though I don't know how much of it you need to do, or how much of it even interests you).

    Some of the stuff I certainly needed to do was -

    - learn how to dress myself (!)
    - learn about makeup
    - practice my voice
    - gain confidence presenting as female in public
    - learn how to take the male swagger out of my walk
    - find what colour goes well in my hair
    - research things like deed polls, hormones, blood test results, surgeries etc

    Having said that, I understand your frustration. Hang in there.


  • Registered Users Posts: 166,026 ✭✭✭✭LegacyUser


    Hiya all, *waves* ^^

    Was wondering if anyone could inform me as to how to contact Prof. O' Shea's office? I have an appointment with him next week (1st time) but am starting to worry that my blood test results never reached him. The appointment letter I received lists a telephone number for the appointments desk, so I'm just wondering if thats the one to ring to find out if they have my results or if theres another number?

    Would rather not show up for my 1st appointment knowing he should have my blood test results only to find out he doesn't and having to wait however many weeks/months for the next appointment.

    (Also to anyone curious, if anyone remembers ;b, I saw Dr. Kelly without incident and got my letter after three sessions. :))


  • Moderators, Computer Games Moderators, Technology & Internet Moderators Posts: 19,240 Mod ✭✭✭✭L.Jenkins


    Hiya all, *waves* ^^

    Was wondering if anyone could inform me as to how to contact Prof. O' Shea's office? I have an appointment with him next week (1st time) but am starting to worry that my blood test results never reached him. The appointment letter I received lists a telephone number for the appointments desk, so I'm just wondering if thats the one to ring to find out if they have my results or if theres another number?

    Would rather not show up for my 1st appointment knowing he should have my blood test results only to find out he doesn't and having to wait however many weeks/months for the next appointment.

    (Also to anyone curious, if anyone remembers ;b, I saw Dr. Kelly without incident and got my letter after three sessions. :))

    Hey, I remember you and your anxiety over making the first step and I'm glad to see that things are moving swiftly. From my experience and I was there only a couple of weeks ago, you will be given a brief check up, weight and blood pressure. Then you will see a Junior Doctor, who will give you a tick the box questions to answer. Don't be nervous and bring a book to take your mind off things if it helps

    I know I have elaborated, but having received your blood test results or not shouldn't be an issue. (Well for me it wasn't) I was given my prescription with the required blood tests to be taken on the condition that I had them done before I took my first hormone injection. Now I'm just waiting to fill my prescription and it's all fun and games.

    If you want to get through to the clinic, it's in the resources thread, but here's the number anyway. 01 211 5066 Do prepare to be fraustrated, but be persistant and don't expect a call back. Just keep ringing until you get through.

    Anyway, best of luck with your appointment and don't be nervous. :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 328 ✭✭BlueSmoker


    Hi guys, first off I would like to say no sorry I am about panicing in going to James Kelly, I have now decided to have my 3 or meetings with Dr Kelly, I thought about it long and hard and I believe I need to do it.

    Secondly I really admire the courage that you girls have, and I do realise that sometimes necessity can be a badge for courage, but what you girls have posted in this thread, is beyond that I have to thank you from the bottom of my heart, thank you.

    Ok how can I give advice, in the advice thread to help out, someone said post your experience, might actually help, and after spending the week in reading how honest you guys are and thinking about it, I might start from their (even if ropey) but the first time I tired to explain or even work out who I was, so forgive me.

    Here's my story, I was lucky enough, that although gender rules where there, they where allowed to be blured, and that is the first time I became confused when I went to school, I didn't mind hanging out with boys, but I didn't mind hanging out with girls either, infact at home I played with both, I never saw them as gender different, I saw them as my friends, I never got the "yuck" thing boys had for girls, I would have a crush on anyone at any time regardless of gender.

    And this is a good enough reason to go and see Dr Kelly.

    The I became seven, I still couldn't understand gender difference, but was told to grow up and be a man, "One Statement, not as harsh as it sounds" got me thinking, also alot of doctors and nurses games made me think hold on a sec "I'm confused???" that's it. Exactly what was going through my head, I spent the next 10 years questioning that confusion, the answers ended up in boxes

    Am I gay (I had one or two crushes on guys in school)
    Am I straight (I had more than two crushes on girls in school)
    Am I ????? (I must be a cross dressing idiot "SURPESS, SURPRESS) not unlike a submaire

    I Surpressed failing quit badly and read up on as much as I could on the "condition", now I cared and care for people but what that medical encylopedia said just turned my blood to stone (I'm still pretending at this point, I clean up the stores and lose those Physchbabble books in the back (they we're bought by my boss for the student market.)

    So I work up the ladder of the bookshop I'm working in for 14 years, my dad died, my mom and most of my family moved to austrialia, I ended up missing them too much, I boworred to much money to chat with them

    Ended up 20,000 in debt, from alot of other things that may become clear.

    Came home was promoted, company closed within 12 months, (Not my fault, but I made his business more value) None at this point I still have no idea what gender or who I like sexually is (I'm using debt as my escape goat (2002)

    After the company was sold and I felt I lost my family again, I stopped trying so hard I'm me and maybe I'm actually a nice person,

    My Mom came home from austrialia, with mayor forgetfullness, I've being carering for her ever since.

    I still until this week realised what I was glancing against, I'm still waiting to find out what gender I am (but as people have point out , it's really not that important we are ourselfs)

    Also the reason I gave the example of my live was so that others could see that we do have a hard time of it (we over think what a cister would do, we do want to be prefected, and we our the ones who wait for the fall. Also allow yourself a clap on the back an kiss of reassurance on the forehead, XX XX. I stilll don't understand gender (yep I understand it as it's put down on paper, and how others understand it) I just never felt it emotionally within my bones, if anyone asked me now or 40 years ago, if I wanted to fit in with the binary system of gender, I am female, rather than male :)


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 328 ✭✭BlueSmoker


    Ok part two of my experiences, I really don't feel different than any other genders, but I do feel misrepresented by some people, every time they say sir, or "good man" (which happened today through txt). I honestly thought that breaking the news first (eg coming out first) would break the cycle and give them time, of what I was hearing from others experiences.

    It just seems to be a phase I'm going through, that every member of my family prays I will change. I spent lunch and a walk with my sister, who appears to want to help, but I keep getting these snide remarks, (like I dye my hair 2 weeks ago and wore it down(I generally wear it in a ponytail)) "what did you do to your hair, have you got split ends" I know my hair can be a fuzz ball, but really and truely it wasn't that night, it was a little fuzzy)

    After lunch and a walk today I asked her what she thought of my hair and she said "it actually works really well, (I was trying to hide grey bits) and it looks so shiney and soft (baby oil, Brilliant :) )

    And we got discussing a couple of other things, I mentioned hormones thearpy, and mentioned how long it might take and wanted to take them sooner than later, her immediate reaction was to call me a "butch female" when taking them, my immediate reaction back at that was "I take a very much smaller shoe size than you" :)

    I told my sister over 20 years ago, and she still thinks I'm a fruit cake, because I was waiting to tell everyone, when I did I was expecting them to say go for it,(they didn't, I image now they were expecting me to do that)

    Now I feel like I have to come out again, easier, but at least everyone has begun breathing again, morale of this tale, you may have too come out again, and again, and again, and again. But if someone asks you who you are be proud and just tell them.

    I've decided to do that, I always did things arse about tip, even the way I was born ( I was trying to come out side ways)

    Poistive: of my experience is that most of my family and friends know, I get great tips off girls

    Negative: I'm still considered male and seen as male (wasn't the reaction I was looking for Grrrr) evening by the people who have known for the last 15 years


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 43 Cherylwalsh3


    I have my appointment on may1st with Dr Canavan,diagnosis from dr kelly and will have my bloods done,should i expect anything to come from it?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,131 ✭✭✭Azure_sky


    I have my appointment on may1st with Dr Canavan,diagnosis from dr kelly and will have my bloods done,should i expect anything to come from it?

    If I remember correctly I think I got my prescription for Zoladex from that appointment. I think it was three or six months and I got my estrodot then.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1 grimnirr


    Hello *waves* I've just moved to Dublin and I need to find a doctor, nurse, or friendly neighbor to help me with intramuscular testosterone injections, and eventually with a prescription. I have brought my prescription and supplies with me from the US, and I have about six months' worth. I am just really awful at giving myself injections. I can do someone else's just fine, and what I've done for the last several years has mostly been to trade shots with someone. Does anyone have an idea of where I might start looking?

    Thanks!


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭RiseToMe


    Hey guys,

    Just made my first appointment With Dr Kelly. Does anybody know of any trans resources aside from teni?

    Thanks


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,783 ✭✭✭Freiheit


    In terms of the Internet the best support site I know of is trueselves.com, very heavily moderated so no crap there, there's obviously also support groups, some under the auspices of teni, others not. P.M. if your in need of anything further.
    F:)


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭RiseToMe


    Folks I'm starting with Dr Kelly in two weeks, just wondering about loughlinstown, I presume this is the only hospital in Dublin dealing with trans folk? The waiting time seems to be three months or over, is this for both medical card and private patients? In terms of privately, is the only option for private (quicker) treatment through the UK?


  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,783 ✭✭✭Freiheit


    I've not heard of any other Dublin options. Dr Bell operates in Galway, available privately fairly quickly, but not sure of her autonomy over Loughlinstown. I don't if Loughlinstown hold private appointments, does anyone else?. I'd be surprised if there wasn't quicker options in the UK but am only surmising. Hope your ok, F


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭RiseToMe


    Thanks for the quick reply, tho I attend uni in the UK several time a year I'm more inclined to start hormones at home as I graduate next June. We just hoping /wondering if there was a way around the time lapse between Dr Kelly diagnosis and seeing o shea for hormones.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1 YoHiOla


    Hi, everybody.

    This post is a little bit different from the norm here, but I'm looking for help. I'm a writer. I've recently signed with an American literary agent and we go out on submission to publishing houses in January. Which is cool, but I've recently started a new novel. It's Young Adult, and has two main characters: a cis white girl, and a FTM transman. I've done a lot of research, but finding an exact (or reasonably-exact) timeline for Ireland is proving difficult.

    If any of you could help me out, that'd be brilliant. Essentially what I'm looking for is the timeline of this sixteen-year-old kid's transition, starting from his coming out. I've read the resource thread here and followed the links but I'm still not 100% on the timeline. I realise everyone is different, but I want to make sure this book is as authentic and realistic as possible. Any help would be appreciated! Thanks! Any questions, message me! Cheers!


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭RiseToMe


    Hey guys and girls,


    So I got my referral from Dr Kelly for loughlinstown and now I need my second referral from a psychiatrist. Dr Kelly did tell me this can be tricky as some psychiatrists haven't dealt with trans folk before and can and do refuse.

    So I have a few questions:

    Do loughlinstown wait until they have both referrals before giving me an appointment?

    Does anybody have a psychiatrist they can recommend that is familiar with trans folk?

    I don't have a medical card, is a private psychiatrist acceptable?


  • Advertisement
  • Registered Users Posts: 2,234 ✭✭✭Meesared


    RiseToMe wrote: »
    Hey guys and girls,


    So I got my referral from Dr Kelly for loughlinstown and now I need my second referral from a psychiatrist. Dr Kelly did tell me this can be tricky as some psychiatrists haven't dealt with trans folk before and can and do refuse.

    So I have a few questions:

    Do loughlinstown wait until they have both referrals before giving me an appointment?

    Does anybody have a psychiatrist they can recommend that is familiar with trans folk?

    I don't have a medical card, is a private psychiatrist acceptable?
    Ill try to help!

    1. No the second opinion is only necessary when and if you get to the surgery point

    2. Afraid not, sorry!

    3. Yes it is indeed!


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭RiseToMe


    Meesared wrote: »
    Ill try to help!

    1. No the second opinion is only necessary when and if you get to the surgery point

    2. Afraid not, sorry!

    3. Yes it is indeed!

    That's great thank, I'm a bit lost in all this now.

    I've made an appointment with my doctor for referral to psychiatrist, would like to get all my ducks in a row and then be able to press forward but glad to know any wait I have won't affect my loughlinstown wait time


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,818 ✭✭✭Lyaiera


    1. The second opinion thing is weird. Some people have needed it, others have not. I had a second opinion from my psychiatrist and that was sufficient. When I was at the clinic a lot of people who had a therapists opinion were being sent to see the in house psychiatrist. I pointed out I had a second opinion already and didn't need to see him.

    2. Sorry, I don't know any private psychiatrists who specialise in gender issues.

    3. No problem with a private psychiatrist.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭RiseToMe


    Thanks for your reply.

    I think I'll push forward with getting my gp to refer me to the psychiatrist and therefore eliminate any hold ups and other things that could stand in my way.


  • Registered Users Posts: 5,818 ✭✭✭Lyaiera


    If he hasn't already ask James Kelly to send your referral to Loughlinstown. Depending on how long you're waiting you could have a second opinion by then. They might start you on anti-androgens if you don't have a second opinion or they might send you to see the in-house psychiatrist.

    You can always just bring your printed letter of support from a psychiatrist once you do get it.

    Best of luck. :)


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭RiseToMe


    I'm signing my paperwork with Dr Kelly next week for him to send my referral

    The waiting times for loughlinstown atm are around 4 months according to him so I hope I'll get my second opinion within then with a private psychiatrist


  • Registered Users Posts: 43 Cherylwalsh3


    RiseToMe wrote: »
    I'm signing my paperwork with Dr Kelly next week for him to send my referral

    The waiting times for loughlinstown atm are around 4 months according to him so I hope I'll get my second opinion within then with a private psychiatrist

    I sent in mine to loughlinstown in jan last year and got an appointment in May. Started on blockers on the 1st appointment. E then 3 months later. The 2nd opinion is really only needed for srs,as far as im aware,and loughlinstown will sort that for you.


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭RiseToMe


    Have ended up privately referred to Jim lucey,any idea long his waiting times are?

    Also how many sessions? At 300 a pop I'm trying to budget


  • Registered Users Posts: 1,272 ✭✭✭RiseToMe


    Guys I have done my deed poll, however the passport office are refusing to change my name until I show that I've been using it for at least two years.

    Is this right?

    The deed poll was done with a solicitor and I renounced the use of previous name entirely from that forth. Can they really force me to keep it and use it essentially illegally?


  • Advertisement
  • Closed Accounts Posts: 1,783 ✭✭✭Freiheit


    6 months perhaps, 2 years, rubbish, mine was legal and in use about 6 months, and I've gotten a female passport... Evidence is required of the name being in use, on various documents, ID's, letters etc, but not for 2 years...


Advertisement