I'm an 19 year old guy and recently started dating a good friend of mine who I secretly liked for a long time. I only had the courage to ask her out a few weeks back and now we are a couple. I am not a virgin, I have had sex lots of times with two different girls (both girlfriends) since I lost my virginity when I was 17. My new girl is a virgin though (she is also 19). Since my two other gfs were not virgins, I'm converned about "breaking" my new gf in... It's supposed to be really painful for virgin girls and she might bleed and everything so I'm looking for advice. I really like her and think I'm falling in love so I want her first time to be good and I really don't want to hurt her like. Can anyone give me advice on things like positions, how gentle I have to be etc etc... Thanks everyone.
It doesn't have to be 'very painful' and there is not always blood.
You do have to take your time though, and let her control the pace. This might be frustrating as she might only be comfortable going part of the way. It will help if she has masturbated before as she will be aware of what does and doesn't do it for her. Let her lead you. If she is not able to do so well then maybe she's not really ready.
Make sure you use your fingers first and don't dive straight in. Lube might be needed and protection of course. Let her guide you.
Side by side is quite nice, or her on top - missionary would probably be a bit much as it gives her almost no control.
Even with the best intentions, it may still not be a great experience for either of you, but at least it and all the pressure it brings will be out of the way.
be gentle and make it the most special day of her life man..... flowers, music, a nice massage with oils, candles, i mean the works, dinner first ya know.
For the act itself, jsut go slowly and ask her to tell you if it hurts or if its more than she can take. let her lead as spurious says, and don't force it if its not working. its likey it might hurt for a few mins then everything will be fine, just relax and remember its a very important day in her life so make it special
Aaaaaaaw, OP I agree with what this dude has said...take is slow and make it memorable.
Just listen to her and follow her movements!
That way, you'll know how gentle to be! Look at her and it's also the biggest giveaway ever!
How much it hurts will depend on how big you are. If you're well endowed it'll hurt quite a bit at first but as long as you take ot very slowly she'l ease into it and get used to it.
The second time you have sex with her don't jump right in cos you think the pain's out of the way, most likely it'll hurt just as badly the second and the third and the fourth and...well you just have to get used to it by having lots of sex I guess!
I had this problem at a festival in Poland with a girl from Ukraine, we got to the door so to speak but it wasnt opening and I just couldnt bring myself to do it! So I just did other stuff, I doubt it'll ever happen again so my one near experience of a virgin isnt much help to you I guess. I'll stick to more experienced girls now I think!
Its probably going to hurt her a little, just be gentle and attentive.
There are three different things involved here.
Firstly, there is the hymen. This may or may not still be wholy intact or partially intact enough that it will break. Even if intact it may be so small as to not be noticed. If it ruptures there may be some pain. How much varies.
Secondly, there is muscular tightness from not being used to penetrative sex.
Thirdly, there are a few different reasons why sex might be painful even if she wasn't a virgin - and since she's a virgin she will not be likely to know yet if she suffers from any of these.
The first is what may cause there to be some bleeding. It's not something to worry about though.
Any pain from the second will be eased by taking time as said above, it will also make any pain from the first easier to endure.
The third is a whole different matter. Probably not going to happen, so don't worry about it, just be aware that it is a possibility.
I'd recommend having lots of non-penetrative sex and not engaging in penetration the first time until she's cum.